Oh good, we’re off to the races with a Ghost of Tsushima joke. Which, after hearing about the premise and reading the history, I can tell you with certainty after watching Senorita Weaselo play about 3 hours and then getting sidetracked with another game (twice), ends in the original definition of the kamikaze, literally the “divine wind.” That’s not spoilers, that’s just extrapolating the actual Mongol invasions of Japan and knowing where this is going. (I do not know if this is correct, someone who’s actually played it can verify.)
Okay, let’s do this, because the tea master called me a professional samurai thanks to knowing the teamaking movements because they’re similar to samurai movements, and by gum, I’m gonna take that one to the grave.
Country: Japan
Where is that? …Seriously?
Capital: Seriously?
Nickname: Samurai Blue
Mascots: Karappe and Karara, two Yatagarasu (mythical three-legged crow that represents/acts as envoy for the Sun and is on the team’s badge)
Current FIFA Ranking: 24th (2nd in AFC)
Notable accomplishments: Qualified for last 7 World Cups (since 1998); 4-time champions of AFC Asian Cup (’92, ’00, 04, ’11), defending runners-up (’19); 1-time runner-up in Confederations Cup (’01, co-hosts); Bronze medal, 1968 Olympics; 1st team outside the Americas to compete in the Copa América (’99 and ’19, withdrew in ’11 and ’15)
Best World Cup result: Round of 16 (’02, ’10, ’18)
Kit which won’t embed. But goddamn, those blues are nice. The whole kit is origami inspired, including the sleeves on the white road unis and the tangential stuff (warmups and the like).
Do I know anyone on this team? Well, if you follow German footy or the J-League, probably. I count eight players playing for German teams, plus others for Belgium, Spain, Portugal, and defender Tokehiro Tomiyasu who plays for the Water Pistols. Their big name and chief goalscorer of Cups past, Shinji Okazaki, may no longer be active for the Samurai Blue though he’s still playing in Belgium, and their other big scorer, Yuya Osako, was left off the World Cup roster. So, it seems to be a young, less experienced squad for Hajime Moriyasu to field. This screams transitions to get ready for 2026, as with the exception of the goalkeepers, there are four players in their 30s on the roster (Shogo Taniguchi-31, Hiroki Sakai-32, Gaku Shibasaki-30, and the captain, Maya Yoshida-34). In contrast, 11 players on the squad are 25 and under.
Who do they play? Oof. They get Germany, Costa Rica, and Spain in Group E. That’s rough. That’s the 11th, 31st, and 7th ranked teams. That may be a bit of pain, though who knows, upset?
Nah, probably not. I say a draw against Los Ticos and that’s it, a disappointing single point, continuing the pattern of alternating between going out in the group stage and the round of 16. (We’ll see what happens next cycle when the field expands.) Not alternating is the Japanese supporters being the tidiest fans in the field, as they are known to not just pick up their trash but any other trash they may see after matches. The cleaning staff thanks them, as as a result they might stay away from any accidents that may occur while in the stadium.
Now for the important questions!
Pick an anime: Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba
Pick a JRPG: As a series, Fire Emblem. Although avoiding the permadeath is always a scary prospect. (Though in more recent games they’ve given options to play without the feature.) As a game, I’ve only mentioned Persona 5 a thousand times, so that.
Pick a Miyazaki film: Crazy as this sounds because it’s not one of the ones everyone knows… The Wind Rises.
Listen, I’m a big fan of the intimacy of the soundtrack. It’s certainly not as bombastic as Howl’s Moving Castle or as feel-good as Ponyo or My Neighbor Totoro and didn’t get the accolades of Spirited Away and isn’t as hilarious as Porco Rosso, but it’s a heartfelt movie. And there are airplanes.
Pick a Japanese baseball player: (non-Ohtani/Ichiro/Godzilla edition) Munenori Kawasaki
Pick a JDM car: R34 Skyline GT-R or Impreza WRX. Yes, in blue. Yes, I was 6 when the first Gran Turismo game came out, however did you know?
Pick a style of sushi: Much to the chagrin of Senorita Weaselo, I still don’t eat fish. Hey, she pulls that off, the parentals will be begging me to put a ring on it. It would be that big of a deal.
MXC or Iron Chef? Yes. Speaking of, they’re apparently rebooting Takeshi’s Castle. No news on whether MXC will also get a reboot.
Pick a Hi-Chew flavor: Watermelon, with cola second.
Pick an underrated/less known drink: Hojicha. As opposed to other Japanese teas, the tea leaves are charcoal roasted instead of steamed. It’s definitely an unexpected taste compared to your standard green tea/matcha.
Pick an NPB team: I mean, I have no rooting interest, but points to the Hokkaido Nippon-Ham Fighters. Nippon Ham is the name of the owning company. Mets legend Tsuyoshi Shinjo is the manner *holds finger to ear piece* Sorry, he goes by Big Boss now. *re-holds finger to ear piece* Sorry, it’s stylized as BIGBOSS. And he does this sort of shit.
In conclusion… someone take me to an NPB game. Please? Also Japan is a land of contrasts.
I just went to a hockey game! The Kings blew a 2-0 lead and scored a great goal to tie things up at 3-3 in the third period, and then within a minute gave up a howler to fall behind again and eventually lose.
Hawkey!
Smoothies for everyone, except the Kings, fuck the Kings.
Speaking of Japan, who can forget the thrilling escapades of the Imperial Japanese Navy of Pacific War fame, who were obliterated in that wonderfully unique Japanese way of committing the same mistake over and over and over again:
If there is one place in the world that’s a land of contrasts, it’s Japan.
Pick a weird kit kat flavor: ALSO hojicha
With so many sports active right now, it’s hard to not have options of some good sports to watch right now. Time to watch some porn and play some games.
I would like to study in Japan. I am eager to learn.
Tonight’s cocktail is the Vieux Carre. Only one day left in the work week, and let’s face it, that’s gonna be a half day.
That’s in my top 3 cocktail rotation
oh, an’ y’all FANCY
Uh, there’s 3 days left in the work week
Sure, Jan.
I have to say that American Thanksgiving is far superior.
First day of a four-day weekend >>>> last day of a three-day weekend
NFL > CFL
Of course it helps that I only have experienced the good parts of American Thanksgiving. Food, drinks, and football with friends. No obligatory gatherings with shitty racist uncles or whatever.
I like this time as its basically few days off for me without taking time off
I am having a beere.
(accent mark implied, don’t care enough to look it up)
The Japanese are in the AFC? I still think the Chiefs will take it, but that gives me pause.
You see, JFK faked his own death so that he could mastermind the plan by which JFK Jr. would fake HIS own death decades later, and then resurface more decades later to become Trump’s running mate and finally bring about the Storm that QAnon has foretold.
It’s simple, really. I am not a crank.
The beauty of the plan is in its simplicity
Exactly. You see, the worldwide pedo conspiracy is so obvious that every bored housewife can uncover it in an afternoon on message boards, but it takes presidents and military leaders decades to expose it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6BRhu1n8aSQ&ab_channel=SavageBaller
Look who turns ten!
In a couple of years, Sanchez will be looking to date it.
Why wait?
— Matt Gaetz
All you guys complaining about Saudi Arabia and their Islamo-fascist government that tends to kill people discriminately (dudes that spray paint happy signs on every Mercedes they can find-they had it coming-amirite?) and indiscriminately-government employees and students get tomorrow off. Did I get the day off after Canada beat the Soviets in ’72? Did I get a long weekend off when Donovan Bailey set a new world record in the 100 in the ’96 Olympic Games? No, I didn’t. Saudi Arabia has quite a bit to teach us about time off.
https://talksport.com/football/1253667/saudi-arabia-public-holiday-argentina-world-cup-king-salman/
I’m stunned to learn that Canada has not declared “Beating The Soviets In ’72” a national holiday. Would’ve thought that was the only thing Quebec and Rest of Canada good agree on.
Let’s see what the internet has to say about Japanese cinema…
Tagayashiize, the farming monster, wanted a strong woman’s bodily fluids, which are essential for producing the finest vegetables. Then Sailor Leviathan happened to appear. Tagayashiizer asked her, “Are you a strong woman?” Sailor Leviathan, whose strength is recognized by Tagayashiizer, is squeezed out of every bodily fluid by this strongest monster. All in order to produce the finest vegetables.
Okay then.
[closes internet for the day]
Haaaaave you seen Grave of the Fireflies? I haven’t, not for any reason or anything…
This made me uncomfortably hard.
Coach Reid was not as impressed.
Too good 😂😅🤣
Automatic +1 for any and all geography jokes has always been a staple of mine
Woo hoo! I learned a new word via context!
And knowing the Requiem Mass! (Thanks, Lacrimosa!)
Nostalgia Hour:
…And Justice For All was the very first cd I bought with my own money, like somewhere in 1988/89/90 when I was old enough to start exploring music for myself instead of listening to my parents music. I’m pretty sure I still have the actual cd around somewhere in a box, for whatever silly reason.
I dunno why that was such A BIG MOMENT for young Pirate, but it was.
Nostalgia hour is usually when Balls reminds us about Marilyn Chambers and Christy Canyon.
Giroud becoming France’s all-timer goal scoring leader feels wrong.
It seems like only yesterday he was in that Boston bar, threatening to steal Woody’s girlfriend.
And that’s when Wakezilka typed “game over” on DFO’s chat
yeah, my TV went off, even. I’m sure FAWX will spend the next hour fluffing Christian Pulisic, the world’s most boring, cromulent Prem squad player.
Damn fine goalie work from some Aussie who isn’t the goalie.
…ultimately didn’t matter, anyway.
I don’t think Melvin Gordon liked his time in Denver https://twitter.com/zacstevensdnvr/status/1595094272406978570?s=46&t=zGPJpLXhMldBWxLogWYmXg
The Herschel Walker running back tree is not off to a good start.
Talking to people here, to the surprise of no one, the divide between the elite ‘s ideological beliefs about the rainbow people and women contrasts a lot with the masses.
Speaking of women, Saudi women are gorgeous. It’s funny how with the exception of one that was wearing a hijab, the rest weren’t wearing any religious clothing.
Takeshi’s Castle is back!!! WOOOOOOOO!!!
After that goal, the Kangas played like they realized they should be losing and corrected that for the French.
That’ll do, Aussies, that’ll do.
Oui oui oui!
I hope the Aussies enjoyed their 10 minutes in the sun!
Japan were dominating The Belges at o e of the best games in Russia 2018. And their fans are loud and clean after themselves. Great team to root
And think of the anime memes if they make the Raging Semis!
We need a country known for dolphins.
Kangaroos 1, Frogs nil??