The Party’s Over… For Now, At Least: Your 2024 New England Patriots Season Preview

The Maestro - August 22, 2024August 15, 2024

Last season was the nadir of the New England Patriots. It had to be. It MUST be. After utter disaster on the field and the departure of the greatest head coach in the history of football, it was clearly time for a complete and total rebuild of the entire organization.

So Long, Tom: Your Tuesday Night Open Thread

The Maestro - February 1, 2022February 1, 2022

It's finally official. In light of the leaks, nobody's really that surprised this time around. Tom Brady is now officially retired from the National Football League. He entered as an unknown sixth-round draft pick, and left as the greatest player in the history of the sport. While it's true that I am

LAST CALL! Pats – Iggles #SB52 Open Thread

Don T - February 4, 2018February 4, 2018

2352

Well well… WELL. This being a Sunday afternoon, Hate Week is no more. Via reactiongifs.us And yet, the Patriots are in the Super Bowl, again. No. 1 seed in the AFC against the Iggles, No. 1 seed in the NFC. Philadelphia is riding a weekend high, after the Hall of Fame selection

Historical Badasses: Henry Knox

Historical Badasses

The Maestro - February 16, 2017February 15, 2017

Canadians don't get to talk about American military history enough. It's a shame, too, because there's a lot of it there - schoolchildren get to talk about the world wars and Native rebellions quite a bit, but there's only one high-school course available in Ontario on American history. All the

Bye Week Update: New England Patriots

The Maestro - November 2, 2016November 1, 2016

The New England Patriots head into their bye week with the best record in the NFL at 7-1. They are better than your favorite team. Their quarterback has an infinitely better life than yours. Their fans remain insufferable as hell. They once drafted a murderer. And despite the sheer annoyingness

Start Or Sit (On Your Face): The DFO Fantasy/Sex Mailbag

The Maestro - October 9, 2015October 9, 2015

So we kicked off Week 5 last night with a 40-year-old Matt Hasselbeck in pants-shitting agony, somehow getting enough energy to overcome a bacterial infection he'd been in the hospital for just two days earlier, throwing for 2 TDs and spearheading the Colts to beating the hapless Houston Texans. So

Bye Week Update: New England Patriots

The Maestro - September 30, 2015September 30, 2015

Week 4 begins tomorrow, and everyone's favorite team to hate, the New England Patriots, head into their bye week sporting a perfect 3-0 record. Not only have they managed to look good in the process of wins over Pittsburgh, Buffalo, and Jacksonville, they've managed to enrage both Roger Goodell and