How to Explain Bad Bunny to Your Children & Open Thread

Don T - February 1, 2026February 3, 2026

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Muy buenas noches, damas y cabrones. I may have mentioned years ago that I am from Puerto Rico, my country: where I work, live, and will die proudly—most likely as a patient after my third stroke, but I morbidly digress. OBVIAMENTE I was thrilled when boricua Bad Bunny was announced as

Yap Yap Yap – Sunday Offseason Etc. Etc.

Getting Hatey In Here

Don T - April 27, 2025April 27, 2025

Living in this Caribbean Paradise, and through the exercise of my profession, I’ve had the enormous privilege of rubbing elbows with scores of talented and dedicated loudmouths. The feigned indignation when lying, the raised voice when cornered, the torrent of personal attacks over unrelated shit (my fave, ymmv), and “Think

Become Revolutionary: Be Decent

Don T - November 6, 2024November 12, 2024

Donald Trump is a proven liar, fraudster, sex assaulter, top-secrets divulger, and is likely a foreign agent. This declining and feckless creep cares about nothing but his money. I’d offer my condolences to U.S. citizens, but 47 is the president of Puerto Rico too. And we don’t get to vote

Wednesday Motivational: Xmas Music Special

Don T - December 20, 2023December 20, 2023

Hello hello. Happy Holidays, which I wish earnestly. Not everybody celebrates Christmas, but nobody is clear from its tornado of consumerism and reliculous traditions. Stores get crowded, traffic gets worse and everywhere you go, there it is, again: Xmas music, melodious browbeating of JESUS, BUY, CHRIST, PAY, LORD and so

Luv 4 USA, 4 Reelz!

Don T - July 2, 2023July 4, 2023

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[Video plays] [Fade in to a mostly steady selfie video of a shirtless handsome man, shot from the neck up, sitting at the beach on a beach chair] Hello, ladies. My name is Dónal Yandel T and I’m speaking live from my Latin American country, Puerto Rico. This around here [turns camera to

The Cozy Simplicity of Crises: a Wednesday Motivational

Don T - October 5, 2022October 5, 2022

Let’s assume, just for a moment, that you are impatient or neurotic (quite a stretch, oh yeah). Imagine you are hungry and you extend an invitation to a friend or loved one for grabbing a bite wherever. And the very worst thing possible happens: “I dunno. Where do you want to

A Weather So Cold It Would Stare At You And Wave “Go” With Its Hand: Tuesday Open Thread

Don T - November 16, 2021November 18, 2021

I spent most of last week until yesterday in the United States and got to experience cold weather AND daylight savings time in the flesh. As I now sit at home shirtless with the fan on, I can say in good faith: I Feel Ya I will never complain again about NFL games starting

Commentist Beer Barrel: Heineken

Don T - December 6, 2019December 6, 2019

Heineken is an amoral mercantile outfit that appropriated the Red Star. Still, please: put down your pitchforks and torches, because I like their beer. Per Wikipedia: Heineken Lager Beer (Dutch: Heineken Pilsener)—wait. Is Heineken a Pilsener or lager? The bottle says “lager”, which settles the issue. At least for me, because I’m not

You Philistines Don’t Deserve Marcus MarioTa – Titans 2019 Preview

Team Previews

Don T - August 28, 2019August 28, 2019

A lot to unpack there! First, hey Fox: fuck you for the misspelling. I’m gonna speculate that the graphics guy was an older feller who thought “Sounds like Torretta, Ruthless Posse WOOO”, and didn’t name check out of self-satisfaction (“I can’t be racist, I know Italians!”). Too much? Listen, you misspell