There are a smattering of Premiership games this morning, with Manure hosting 15th position Middlesbrough (10:00, NBCSN) getting feature treatment. Leicester/West Ham and Chelsea/Stoke are probably better options in the morning window, though. Consult your Extra Time listings.
But the big action (Euro-speaking) today is at Anfield, where the 2nd place Shite host 3rd position (and 1 point behind) Man City (12:30, NBC). Of course, my NBC affiliate is pre-empting the match for…sigh…syndicated ACC hoops. The South ,, amirite?? Anyway, I shall send good vibes to the Manc blues for this one, naturally. This “Klopp title challenge” talk needs strangling in the crib.
EPL fun boomerangs right back around Monday/Tuesday, so I will preview that during or right after Hippo Thoughts.
Citrus Bowl – LSU vs. Louisville (11:00, ABC)
Both of these teams pretty much fell slam-ass apart down the stretch, so I have no clue what to expect. 2017’s most overrated fantasy prospect (yeah, I said it, wanna fight about it??) Leonard Fournette isn’t playing, so it won’t be as easy to compare and contrast how his backup does exactly the same thing.
Gator Bowl – Georgia Tech vs. Kentucky (11:00, ESPN)
This used to be a pretty proud, high-value destination bowl. Now look at it. Stripped of its name, hosting these two bleeding sacks of shit. Of course, now that I’ve said this…game of the day, for certain.
National Semifinal #1 – Alabama vs. Washington (3:00, ESPN)
Definitely the fixture of the day, so of course NC State’s basketball opener happens right in the middle of it. Lots of chuckles about Nick Saban and “coachspeak” regarding his statements re the Huskies being the best side his team have faced, and a stern/unique test…but I think it’s true. UW is very, very fast, and can hit you in many different ways. They won’t let Roll Damn Tide dictate the terms of play, and that’s 90% of the battle. I am interested.
But FUCK YOU, I will not list your meaningless bowl title. National. Semifinal.
National Semifinal #2 – Clemson vs. Ohio State (7:00, ESPN)
Just thunder fuck both of these asshole programs/coaches right in the ass, please. I know I will be cheering for whoever wins match #1 to win it all, that’s for sure. Maybe it will be a good, entertaining game, or barring that, at least over in plenty of time for me to defiantly crash out before midnight. I will not give 2016 the satisfaction of a goodbye, even with a middle finger.
It’s always time for Pitbull.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/35af9afc31b486fdadcbcbb155dd4708/tumblr_ocrwzx38Yx1r888xpo1_500.jpg
Chase Kennedy. Has 51″ legs.
2017 is getting to be interesting.
Most people don’t stop and look at the good in life.
I had a brand new grandbaby and my Cubs won the World Series!
Nobody can take that away!
It was a good year!
“It’s export-quality semen, we only deal with the best.”
http://firstwefeast.com/drink/2015/08/semen-beer-new-zealand-green-man-pub
Happy New Years Mountain DFOs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2YH9dr2DNSo
2016, the year we give up
http://68.media.tumblr.com/704cab356d9ef47b7a5d2363824cec5f/tumblr_ocutc8AyTj1u1zr1lo1_1280.jpg
Yikes.
I’m sorry, what?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NO2cHJmDkBg&app=desktop
You know how to tell 2016 sucked? Roger Goodell is still alive.
Roger Goodell is a national discgrace
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xdrqy0OK3QU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpvdAJYvofI
Cool story time. The original band is still together.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_tyWt_9Bfs
What are we celebrating again?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lYac9O3GYTM
Back at the apartment after a stop at a house party after dinner. Wayne’s World is on tv. I may have to start masturbating to Tia Carrera if my gf doesn’t come back to the couch soon.
Have to, or get to?
Huh, that usually makes my girlfriend take even longer to come back to the couch.
http://25.media.tumblr.com/6425e964483387b4abce3e919881d4e1/tumblr_msmnyst2DI1s83ffjo1_500.gif
Central time zone:
Definitely in the top 4 of the time zones of the contintal us states
Fuck Mountain. Atlantic 4 Lyf
Woops. I could’ve sworn part of Maine was in ATL
Let’s drink to the Cowboys!
To them, or due to them?
“Let’s drink the Cowboys”
-Most Texas hookers in the 90s
Dance your asses off Central Time
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2YH9dr2DNSo
Hey 2016,
http://31.media.tumblr.com/d0c3aa8b1805e7a4ad8edd3e648316b5/tumblr_mlg7e7Qc5i1ronhn5o1_500.gif
Welcome to 2017, those of you on DFO time. What kept you so long?
Holy shit, you’re right, it’s New Year according to DFO time!
/makes out with empty beer bottle
Nah,
Too soon.
Happy New Year from the Central timezone!
http://68.media.tumblr.com/74524cf4db4aefe284531654fdff34da/tumblr_oe7n3ntTw01u1zr1lo1_1280.jpg
So this dog keeps pulling beer bottles out of the trash.
Either that dog is looking for food, or its an alcoholic.
Also happy new year fellow Midwesterners!
http://68.media.tumblr.com/287ea14f5c7c33a45398da3b44e95559/tumblr_odq4bnKjoe1u1zr1lo1_1280.jpg
Happy New Year Moline, and Rock Island Illinois and Davenport and Bettendorph Iowa!
MORE MUSIC!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8iGvfWus-y4
http://25.media.tumblr.com/2066470dbbd89822efde6ea793f2419c/tumblr_mptx7aQjLn1qc9pxno1_400.gif
Do y’all know what it’s gonna take to keep my old ass up for another two hours?
I don’t either.
I may have an idea though.
I’ve got an idea…
http://68.media.tumblr.com/120053d7464e770fc212b117696a988b/tumblr_ofoyq3aGiX1u1zr1lo6_1280.jpg
Happy New Year reprobates.
How is the party going?
http://68.media.tumblr.com/debd0ffbe200e53adb3b4f0be42f6826/tumblr_oglxtlAwCl1u1zr1lo1_500.jpg
Jacksonville or Tampa? YOU DECIDE
http://68.media.tumblr.com/6635264f93c4a17b2973de5ebcdd22e8/tumblr_ogcl2hKj181u1zr1lo9_1280.jpg
You too Horatio.
We don’t get much one on one interaction, which is a shame but I just want to say that you are easily one of my favorite commentists and I wish you and the rest of the Cornblowers the best New Year possible.
I still have nothing but hate for your Cowboys.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/a81a2b500d7c161eb32139e62cd0cbc0/tumblr_ofoysjJx2a1u1zr1lo4_1280.jpg
Thanks man. One of these days the wife and I are gonna surprise one of your West Coast gatherings and after that well, pretty much none of you are ever gonna acknowledge me again.
But for now everything’s great and I’m truly sorry about the state of the Vikings.
Sorry being a key word.
Is it too early to wish for 2018?
We can have chocolate frosting on the cupcakes.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/2b51b0711123fd153c2c94473ce70beb/tumblr_oglxs7mpeQ1u1zr1lo1_500.jpg
I cosign this for banner quote.
DID SHE PICK UP THE SPLIT OR NOT!?!?!?!?
http://68.media.tumblr.com/496ea0e32639fd974ae76a5b99fa2ae8/tumblr_ogpyh3Bp2k1u1zr1lo3_1280.jpg
Two and a half hours may be a stretch.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xpoi3Q7whQ
Father Mulcahey kicked it.
Son of a gun.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/502fe31f528e77a5ca2286572a33ff65/tumblr_ogze5sVPGj1u1zr1lo8_500.jpg
Too much wasted onion
http://68.media.tumblr.com/0156e4f05475467f0cf3034feb1d0bb6/tumblr_ogpyjiqh781u1zr1lo2_500.jpg
Wow.
Wow.
I assumed “Topless Keira Knightly Getting Spanked [NSFW]” would be hotter. https://gfycat.com/CourteousInfamousElver
http://is.4chan.org/b/1483247826758.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4GrDOOIIbk
http://68.media.tumblr.com/47fb4cf2d1a6a31a700a462987f801c1/tumblr_ogze0x7vT61u1zr1lo2_1280.jpg
Thanks Obama
Trump knives, folks!
http://68.media.tumblr.com/d58a022524be1eaa3067542eab1e2292/tumblr_oj0kxr9ASM1ude2zdo1_1280.jpg
Ass or just trickery?
http://68.media.tumblr.com/499cbafd0b3b0b3f50f8c7dd138ee519/tumblr_mq0hwr2YNT1qctyjdo1_1280.jpg
I see attractive women at my Starbucks every fucking day and one of these days I will have the balls to talk to one.
I did once, it turned out ok. We dated for a year. Do it man, it only builds your confidence.
I talk to them pretty much every time I go in there.
It’s the only way I can place my order.
Working off her being in Charlie Wilson’s War (video link on the previous page), Amy Adams was a shockingly pleasant surprise in Night at the Museum 2.
Time to scream along with Biz Markie at full volume in 2017 as a 33 year old
My resolution for 2017: To crush my enemies, to see them driven before me, and to hear the lamentations of their women.
My resolution for 2017: To drink beer, watch sports and sleep often.
I’m off to join a party after I’ve been at work. I plan to play a dangerous game of catch up.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gql9220Qon8
I miss Dick Clark.
I need to up my cooking game.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ldk2pLyVZ4c
Not that I have anything to vacate from, but vacations seem cool.
Mom: “Who are the guys in the robe?”
Dad: “I don’t know.”
Me: “Maybe a rock group.”
Brother: “Its New York. Maybe they are escaped mental patients.”
Why not both?
Not far from the tree.