Start predicting how the Browns will waste all those draft picks.

NFL News:

• In a bid to force Boltman’s appearance at his Hall of Fame induction (to kill all in attendance),  LaChargers have appointed LaDainian Tomlinson as a special assistant to the owner.

• A.J. McCarron isn’t going anywhere, according to Marv Lewis, who also isn’t going anywhere, thereby ensuring the Bengals aren’t going anywhere in 2017.

• T.J. McDonald just made his off-season rougher by acquiring an 8-game suspension for substance abuse, ensuring whichever team signs him can’t use him right away.

• Deadspin (I know, I know) collected the numbers, and it seems Oakland will still owe $163 million on their facilities after the Raiders and Warriors leave their East Bay homes.
  • which should help the A’s get a new home right away.

• AHH – KILL IT WITH FIRE!
  • apparently, CBS wants Phil Simms to retire, only to replace him with Tony Romo alongside Jim Nantz, if Romo ends up being released.

• In a fan vote, supporters of the Indoor Football League’s Salt Lake Screaming Eagles prevented the team from signing former Cowboy & active asshole Greg Hardy.
  • at this point, I’d joke about how his only option now is to keep driving north & show his passport at the border, but the CFL has blocked all teams from adding him to their negotiation lists.
    • it happened in 2016, when the Green Riders tried to add him to their list.

I do apologize for linking to Skip & Shannon, but God bless Michael Bennett for asking the REAL questions, like how the FBI can find Tom Brady’s missing jersey so quickly but not Tupac & Biggie’s killers after 20 years.

"We still don't know who killed Tupac & Notorious B.I.G., but they found that jersey" —@mosesbread72 on FBI finding Brady's jersey in Mexico pic.twitter.com/WPi1Jgx5rj

— UNDISPUTED (@undisputed) March 29, 2017

Finally, a very good long read from Michael Rosenberg over at si.com. It is a sober analysis at the factors keeping Colin Kaepernick from being signed so far this off-season.

• He avoids the knee-jerk summation that it’s racism, but does delve into how exactly Mike Glennon is worth $19 million per, but Kaep can’t even get a sniff, and it’s not just because people love giraffes.
• Also, they talk to Jim Harbaugh & Chip Kelly (was Jim Tomsula too busy?), and both have nothing but honest praise for a guy who does his job despite all the other noise, which has taken on meme life of its own.

Tonight’s sports:

• NHL:
  • Islanders at Flyers – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
  • Stars at Bruins – 7:30PM | NBCSN
• NBA:
  • Cavaliers at Bulls – 8:00PM | TNT / Sportsnet1
  • Rockets at Trail Blazers – 10:30PM | TNT / Sportsnet1
• NCAA:
  • NIT Championship Game:
    • Georgia Tech vs. TCU – 8:00PM | ESPN
  • College Baseball:
    • Mississippi State at Mississippi – 8:00PM | ESPNU

With the next couple of evenings being Sexy Friday & Final Four semis on Saturday, looks like I’ll see you Sunday night for Wrestlemania! C-M-PUNK! C-M-PUNK!