NFL News:
- Ravens owner Steve Biscotti (pictured right) reached out to people like Ray Lewis to garner possible reactions to the potential signing of Colin Kaepernick.
- Because Ray Lewis might’ve helped kill a guy, but Ravens fans DO NOT FORGIVE taking a knee during a ceremonial part of a sporting contest.
- Branden Albert decided he’d rather retire than play for the Jaguars.
- Seahawks rookie Malik McDowell injured himself on an ATV, in the time between rookie camp and main camp, and is absent from training camp.
- Estimates about the seriousness of the injury & expected absence from camp range from a couple of weeks to the whole season.
- This should be interesting: the Chargers are hard-balling Philip Rivers & Antonio Gates, saying practice should come before attending ceremonial events like LaDanian Tomlinson’s Hall of Fame enshrinement ceremony.
- We all know Marmalard’s a good company man, but Gates is being rumoured as willing to go, because he figures the Chargers won’t punish him due to his stature.
- Looks like someone is up for the Jim Irsay challenge: John Bowlen caught himself a DUI in California.
- He was observed doing 100 mph & passing cars on the median, and blew over 0.08 on the field test.
- Police turned his puppy – named Duke (of course) – over to animal control.
- He even pulled the “do you know who I am” card:
- He was observed doing 100 mph & passing cars on the median, and blew over 0.08 on the field test.
After the Jeep passed a patrol car, the officer pulled the speeding driver over. The trooper noticed an open container of alcohol in the SUV. The man who lives near Redondo Beach kept telling officers “who his dad was.”
“He wasn’t cooperative. He did make it clear several times that he was the son of Denver Broncos owner Pat Bowlen. It didn’t help. We arrested him just like any other citizen. He got no preferential treatment,” said Sgt. Tim Neumann, spokesman for the California Highway Patrol.
Finally, fresh of last week’s ball fondling of the Patriots by the MMQB & chief fluffer Peter King, comes ESPN‘s entry into the Patriots soft coverage with ruminations on how likely it is (hint: QUITE!) that the Pats might finally go 19-0.
Tonight’s sports:
- MLB:
- Indians at Red Sox – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN
- Blue Jays at White Sox – 8:00Pm | Sportsnet
- WWE:
- Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
Today was the MLB trade deadline; were deals afoot? I dunno. NOT FOOTBALL; NO LIVEBLOG!
I didn’t realize Hannah Murray did anything before being Gilly on GoT.
h
ttps://i.imgur.com/NsEnYSG.gifv
She needs to eat a sammich or something.
That’s from Skins. I think her character was supposed to have an eating disorder or something.
Cutting to tWBS’s chase. https://www.reddit.com/r/nsfwCelebArchive/comments/638ixu/alice_eve/
Congratulations to Los Angeles on “winning” the 2028 Olympics. I assume that in the next decade there are going to be a lot of shithead eurotrash idiot children “attending” UCLA and USC even though they can’t spell in their native languages. Luckily, Los Angeles is so used to corruption at that level that nothing much will change.
*sigh*
My brother’s been lamenting how they’re building up all of these towers in Los Angeles and up to the hills like on Sunset so that the views that drew so many people to those neightborhoods are being destroyed. And it just occurred to me that is what’s been happening here. There is one goddamn tower that was built in downtown that totally blocks the view of Mt. Hood from all but the topmost floors because of this, and there are just more and more towers being built. I need to go back and find my favorite photo from walking around that I posted on Instagram with the label “Gentrification.”
Are you actually comparing Portland to Los Angeles? Lemme know when you get more than one sports team.
/sits in traffic for 53 minutes to drive 4 miles
Real estate speculators and commercial RE builders are making housing miserable as shit for all the big cities along the west coast. That’s all I’m saying. At least we’re not Vancouver, which has people being crowded out of housing while these buildings sit completely empty because they’re owned by Chinese speculators.
You are correct, just busting your balls, unless you don’t have them, in which case, congrats on being married. (Note: I have been married for >20 years)
Have ’em. Don’t use ’em.
Eventually all major sports will take place in Pyongyang.
I still sometimes ponder what insane corrupt shit would have happened if Chicago had hosted the 2016 Olympics.
What would be more insane, the corruption itself or the batshit circus congressional investigations because those motherfuckers would’ve been absolutely intent on proving Obama and his friends personally profited off the games?
The Moose Method returns.
Take the hint.
h
ttps://images.sex.com/images/pinporn/2014/01/04/300/4551296.gif
lol at images dot sex dot com as a regularly visited site…brb
bouncy bouncy
When was the point where the Deadspin commentariat became so… uninteresting. Reading the comments on the Bears WYTS all I see are boring dimwits I’d find on any sports site.
I believe the consensus I’ve seen from comments on the site marks it as when it switched to Kinja
Seems about right.
You mean… Bears fans?
(Present company excluded, of course.)
I will burn your house to the ground
I mean Hi.
Oh, Bears fans are awful–somehow worse than Cubs fans who are a generally loathsome bunch.
But the quality of the non-Bear-fan posts there are shit too.
Terry Richardson’s father.
The life of a crime scene photographer?
History of colonoscopy, Part I.
You rang?
“Yep, that’s a butthole all right.”
https://imgix.ranker.com/user_node_img/50010/1000195880/original/alice-eve-in-crochet-lacey-night-dress-photo-u1?w=650&q=50&fm=jpg
Dammit Alice!!!!!
I gotcha fam
Muchas Gracias
Hold up, Goon 2’s had a release date this whole time and it wasn’t plastered all over? This is an outrage!
I assume one of the usual suspects wrote this on reddit.
Well, she’s straight forward.
Been there.
Frog pussy tho.
Has to be…. water tight.
When I said 3 months ago at least now that a Taco Bell employee took pity on me for sitting in line for 45 minutes gifting me a giant bag of sauce. I wasn’t lying. I still have 3/4 of a bag of just sauce
Wait. What? Why were you in line for 45 minutes?
My only guess is 2 people quit, then I got stuck in a line that allows no one to leave because how it was designed
Wait, why were you at a Taco Bell? like, ever?
I was drunk and people were telling me to eat at least one meal, There weren’t many choices
Wow. That’s fucked up.
The person working gave me a giant bag filled with sauce. I will live
Yeah. Plus, 45 minutes away from your father. Win-win.
Well I made it to Providence, RI after a 2 hour delay in Philly, and an hour drive from FACKIN’ BEAN TOWN. Two beers deep at the hotel, and need about two more to “adjust” to local time.
Here, I’ll help.
I feel an intimate connection to that city after listening to Crimetown, and that connection is full of cocaine.
Bahstan Lahgah!
Why are the dogs barking?
Squirrel with Parkinson’s. Got it.
Dear lord, I think I just had a stroke.
(get it?)
heh heh. tWBS is a “Member”.
Just the one?
I WAS ALREADY WORKED UP LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!
I wonder how long Gorka’s going to last in the White House now that the chief of staff is a former general cut from the Jack D. Ripper mold. He’ll either be fired out of a cannon by the weekend or earn a permanent spot sucking off Kelly forever.
So does Spicer still leave?
No idea. I just think a Nazi perpetually sucking off a general is funny
He already stole the mini-fridge.
Not kidding.
http://www.businessinsider.com/sean-spicer-allegedly-swiped-a-mini-fridge-from-an-office-of-junior-staffers-2017-7
The long-term impact of the Trump administration is that by 2020, our government will be indistinguishable from an episode of WWE Raw.
Giving RAW more credit than it deserves
HEY WHERE’S BALLS I WANNA SEE THE GREEN BUTTPLUG!!!!
OK, that might sound odd to any of you who haven’t been around the past few days I guess.
I am just gonna assume tWBS is sniffing glue now. I will take you to your bed, And yes this is me stealing your weed. This is part of the process. We will get you well
Considering my Alice Eve boner right now, I should warn you not to turn your back on me.
/hoping you’ll turn your back on me
/should probably close Alice Eve tab
//NEVAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, this day was wasted.
Sorry to hear that, sincerely.
Good day for me tho…one less racist prick I’m related to in the world.
Time for meatloaf….
http://www.rockymusic.org/img/celebrityphotos/MeatLoaf-Paradise-EllenFoley1978L.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1S1AxSD_31A
Woohoo! Time for booze.
/might have to rub one out soon
//realizes no one is surprised
You realize you don’t need to share that information every time you do it. Right?
I KNOW! It really makes it difficult to edge when hot thoughts push in.
http://pre02.deviantart.net/8908/th/pre/f/2014/001/6/2/ariel_not_so_little_mermaid_by_elias_chatzoudis-d70d13a.jpg
That guy is great. Has been one of my artsy “friends” for years.
It make me happy as a fan of the Raiders that they got a top 10 talent at 24, but it makes me sad* as a Raiders fan that so many fellow fans are screaming “if a woman accuses a man of rape and he isn’t convicted, they should throw HER in jail.”
*in Baltimore they call that “stabby”.
I thought you had to say “stabby” 3 times before he’d appear.
A certain someone thought the same thing.
He ded.
Anyone besides me ever been bitten by a macaw?
That shit hurts.
Regular parrot (not the plagiarism kind), drew some blood.
I still have a chunk of meat (giggity) missing from my left forearm.
I wanted to euthanize that feathered fucker so badly.
No, he wasn’t sick, but I still wanted to off him.
As a kid, one of my friends had a macaw. The phrases that it learned were “Hello,” “Come here” and “I love you.”
That bird was a fucking asshole.
Championships cure everything.
LMFAO
I thought Richard Pryor died already.
“THAT’S what you’re wearing to dinner tonight !?!”
“I’m fine with that, where do you want to go?”
“I’ve got your meal right here.”
“Fine, a snack then.”
Every episode of Undisputed should end with Shannon punching Skip in his stupid fucking head.
I would pay Sharpe and be a character witness if he would just smash that face until death.
If you just showed clips of the show you could probably have an insanity defense without doing anything else.
…should start, go to break, continue, and end with…
/tomato, tohappiness
They could have a Twitter poll to see which weapon Shannon gets to use each episode.
Raiders first round pick Gareon Conley was not indicted by a grand jury.
This was a very strong statement considering earlier in the day that same grand jury had indicted a ham sandwich.
That ham sandwich, however, has apparently jumped bail as it has been missing since yesterday, when it was last seen attending a scheduled meeting with Andy Reid.
Like a ham lamb to slaughter…
Apparently the Buccaneers have Ryan Griffin as a backup QB, when I swear he was a TE on the Texans.
Hey look…
I think they just decided to sign a guy that looked like Mike Glennon with hair…for some reason.
Up yours!!! I’ve got hair!!!!
He in no way looks as awkward as Mike Glennon. Also his neck is at least 6″ too short
How many people do you think named their dog Avon Barksdale?
Five? I bet it’s five.
At least.
I saw Valerian last night and this is my brief review:
The graphics were great and everything else was Cleveland Browns bad. Like, I’m pretty sure they spent all their money on graphics and then went to the local high school and found a senior willing to ghost write the script for a letter of recommendation to NYU.
The lead male tried to portray Keannu Reeves in Bill and Ted’d Bogus Journey and Carla D tried to do her best Daisy Ridley impersonation.
The love story was clearly written by a virgin and the metaphor about African slavery was peculiar at best. And the bad guy’s motives were painfully stupid and non sensical.
I give it 1 failed franchise out of 10 sequals.
Watch this film if it’s on at 2 am on a Sunday night and you have nothing better to do. Even then, consider rubbing one out.
I have more to say about this so I might write later about this turd.
I thought the whole gist was the man lead was suppose to look like a woman and the female lead was suppose to look like a young boy.
Did Cara’s eyebrows get listed in the credits this time? Or are those part of the CGI budget?
Oh, Alice you are truly a Wonderland.
I was going to make a “Consider the following: Maybe Kaepernick sucks” but I just saw his stats. His accuracy is kind of average but his running ability and TD-INT ratio definitely makes it worth taking a flyer on the guy.
What do his “Is a White Person” numbers look like?
If he cut off his fro he could easily get white person street cred. He is barely tan.
Not good, but Dalton broke the curve.
Oh, well, if you convert to white and no public stances on anything worthwhile he is “Franchise” material.
He could start for the Browns til he’s 50
Not with their line…….but good point.
The last two years he has not been that good, his being on a terrible team may have a slight affect. The point is he is way better than a shit tonne of QBs who have been pursued and signed by other teams.
Trevone Boykin has almost as many arrests as game appearances, but he isn’t controversial so I guess it makes sense he has a contract.
“Hey, you can’t just try to draw attention to social injustice. That is way worse than beating women.”
-Anonymous NFL source
h
ttps://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/66/a6/5c/66a65c64249d3c265ab22b6c96501bce.gif
NSFW
But nice.
Apologies, sincerely.
I used the “Moose Method” of breaking up the addy, thought it would be clear the nsfw aspect.
That is enough sign for anybody, since you have to copy and paste.
The MM results in women rolling their eyes (not in the good way).
Just didn’t want to get someone in trouble by opening something at work. It could’ve been a huge picture or something.
Edit: Well they were huge…
OK, OK, I’ve got a great joke….
Q: What does one say to their racist prick grandfather the last time you see him?
A: Nothing. Fucker’s dead.
It sounded funnier in my head.
Nope; it was funny in my head too….. of course that is not saying much, but still.
HA!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=493pL_Vbtnc
I would have gone with this one myself
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vcZ9ku_wInw
Also appropriate. 🙂
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wVagQ_LVd4
Fucking America man…seriously. Kaepernick can’t even get a fucking backup job. How does this fucking make sense in this day and age?
Again…his controversial position is that the police should not have the right to perform on the spot extrajudicial executions of unarmed black men and teenagers.
How the fuck is this controversial?!?!
Straight up, if MLK Jr was alive to day, people would be demanding he gets thrown into Gitmo and exectuted.
Lots of principled Americans with respect for the plight of others in this list: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_NFL_franchise_owners
I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t bother with any of that now. Just claim his position at a podium was threatening. Have a cop shoot him. Pretend to do an investigation for 6 months until people forget it happened. Then let the cop off with a 1 week suspension.
If only I had the willpower to boycott this shit ass league of footballing that I love so much
Also, not for nothing, people did demand MLK get executed, thus the whole assassination thing.
Including the FBI
/forgets to close Alice Eve tab
//regrets nothing
I am genuinely disappointed in all of you. All these comments and no Biscotti had cum all over himself jokes?
FOR SHAME!
Look, Balls. We just eat the cookies. Whatever you do to it is between you and the cookie.
http://list.lisimg.com/image/14794570/700full.jpg
WHhhaa???
Random Thought: When they finally perfect sex robots, the Alice Eve model will likely be a big seller.
You mean I can only buy one?!
What kind of warranty are we looking at for these?
/asking for the audience in general
Seth MacFarlane in I Can’t Believe its not Galaxy Quest?
I can suffer through the “God doesn’t exist and you’re stupid to believe in him” jokes for that.
I said this on reddit (KILL ME) after an article came out saying ST: Discovery will be “grittier” that Macfarlane is such a Trek fanboy that The Orville will definitely be more faithful to Roddenberry’s vision than Trek has been for at least a decade.
Apparently, Cap’n Picard is almost 80. I wonder at what point in my life nostalgia became the first step to “When is this thing I used to love going to die?”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oeGMHbK4NlA
http://i.imgur.com/Wv3aDT4.jpg
I believe his secret is weed and young pussy
If your bored and drunk, watch World War Z but replace the Zombies with Trump supporters.
So…no changes needed?
Aside from the fact that if you’re actually sick, they want to eat you that much more.
I finally read Magary’s WYTS on the Bears. To the guy who wears a Super Bowl XX Belt Buckle:
a) FUCK YOU
b) You don’t live in Illinois, or at least not the top third of it
c) If you do live in Illinois, please move
I’m curious about the WYTS Bengals edition. The bar is set pretty damn high.
Hey! How are all my imaginary internet friends?
Not drunk yet
How ’bout now?
Scotch is flowing, sobriety remains an ongoing problem
I’m having a similar issue with freezer vodka tonight.
DAMN YOU ALCOHOL, YOU FICKLE BITCH!!!!!!!
I can’t drink. I work tomorrow.
(stares at five empty snack cake packages)
I may not be sleeping tonight, either.
I’m still at work
Playing ball drinking beer. Hope you are well.
Watching Star Trek: Voyager episode “Equinox”: Good Stranded Ship find another Stranded Ship that went heel. Good episode, but it does have some flaws.
– Evil Ship made Good Ship’s Hologram Doctor evil by deleting his ethical subroutines. That’s it. That means the Doctor is inherently evil without an program in my matrix saying:
10 NOT be-evil
20 RETURN
– Good Ship Captain went nuts by hunting down Evil Ship because “its personal”. When 1st Officer questioned, he was relieved of duty. No one in the crew questioned it. Not even the 2nd Officer, the Vulcan who is supposed to be driven by logic. So it is logical for the Good Captain to attack a peace alien race, attempt to kill a prisoner and hunt down a kill people with due process or a day in court.
– Good Ship picked up six crew members from Evil Ship at the end, and they were never heard from again. They did say their rights and privileges would be restricted, but the crew has a mess hall manned by one person. At no time were they seen serving food or even moping the floors. Star Trek VI showed waiters on a ship, but they not only wasted a perfectly good idea by showing what happens to the people who have fallen from grace. My theory: Janeway killed the bastards.
My cable company actually got rid of UPN before the last season of Voyager. I trust I didn’t miss anything worthwhile? I mean, I got to see the Rock give Jeri Ryan the Rock Bottom, so what else was there worth seeing?
You missed a very good Jeri Ryan acted episode where she acted as the Doctor, and Q’s kid.
Its wasn’t bad like TNG Season 7. It wasn’t awesome DS9 Season 7. But they had some good episodes.
If you got Netflix and nothing better to do, its worth seeing, but you’re not missing much.
I need to rewatch DS9 one of these days. I just remember it being a pattern of like 5 holy fuck boring “Going to work, going home” episodes and 2-3 fucking great war episodes over and over again.
Agreed. DS9 had the better story. Voyager had some better actors (Seven, Doctor, Torres and even Kim and Neelix had some moments), but DS9 was just better overall.
its stories like these that make me leery to really invest time into trek.
I made that mistake with enterprise….. reluctant to try again…
You had me at “Jeri Ryan”.
I mean who wouldn’t want to take her to a sex club?
https://mobile.twitter.com/mtsw/status/892091870855270400
THEY STOLE OUR BIT!
Not sure what his home planet looks like but I’m sure Scaramucci’s idea of hell is a place with no mirrors.
I bet if you made up some new age horseshit about how it would extend his career you could get Tom Brady to smash all the mirrors in his house.
Would Pat Bowlen’s son even get preferential treatment in Colorado? Why the fuck would he get it in California?
Okay, purely hypothetical situation. You are in a room with Donald Trump and Peter King. You’re holding a gun but with only one bullet.
What do you do?
I think you could shoot PK’s head and Trump’s dick off with one bullet
Am I a spice baron? Cuz Trumpy gonna take hisself out (politically).
NO ONE MAN CAN HAVE THAT MUCH CONTROL OVER OUR NUTMEG.
“Someone called for a spice baron?”
First I would do some physics.
That would be enough to kill both.
Do they know I only have one bullet? If not, make them fight to the death, with an empty promise to let the victor live.
If so, try to line up a shot that kills one and wounds the other, then pistol whip the survivor to death.
Rikki’s answer is the only answer.
I mean, there’s two games each against the Jets, Bills, and Phins, so that just asks whether they can go 10-0 in the non-divisional games!
/Starts thinking about buying and stocking a liquor cabinet
They can lose in the playoffs.
Assuming God hates me and the Bengals face the Steelers again, I’m all for the Bengals forfeiting and loaning out AJ Green, Geno Atkins and Vontaze Burfict to Pittsburgh for a game.
I may hate the Steelers; but I have my principles.