Your “24 Hours to the Most Anticipated Exhibition Game Of The Year!” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

NFL News:

  • Injuries:
    • The Rams defence has suffered another fatal blow for this season: Dominique Easley has torn an ACL & is out for all of 2017.
      • It’s his third; he had two in college.
      • In his four-year career, 2016 was the only year he didn’t finish the season on IR
    • Giants WR Sterling Shepard either rolled or tore up his ankle in practice Wednesday.
      • The ambiguity comes from viewing the injury versus waiting for test results.
  • Apparently, the impediment to the Ravens signing Colin Kaepernick is owner Steve Bisciotti.
    • He is apparently quite upset both that someone leaked his name and that John Harbaugh has been so effuse in wanting him on the team.
      • It’s putting him in the role of “bad cop”, which is something good friend Ray Lewis is uncomfortable with.
      • If Harbaugh keeps pushing the point, it could be an issue at season’s end, if the Ravens fail to make the playoffs.
  • In the “I thought he was already dead” department, famed Notre Dame coach Ara Parseghian died Wednesday morning, aged 94.
    • He won two national titles in 1966 & 1973, and retired with a record of 95-17-4.
      • The 1973 Sugar Bowl victory over ‘Bama is considered one of the best college games of all time.
    • He is generally considered the man responsible for returning the Irish to national prominence.
  • Does this come under irony: A lack of coaches has forced Vince Lombardi High in Green Bay to suspend its program for the 2017 season.

Finally, per ESPN, for the second year in a row, the Cowboys start the season the League leader in suspensions.

  • This will cost the Cowboys a minimum of 25% of the three players lost salary – about $91,000.
    • Furthers suspensions will cost the Cowboys 33%.
  • The suspension of Damontre Moore last week pushed the Cowboys up to three suspended players, exceeding the minimum, and no doubt making the ghost of Al Davis laugh.
    • The funny part is that Moore was suspended for something he did while with the Seahawks.
  • Three more Cowboys are possibly facing suspension: Ezekiel Elliott, Nolan Carroll and Damien Wilson. That could bring the fine to $500,000 — the maximum, per NFL rules.

In case you didn’t catch Big Daddy Drew’s WYTS on the Jags yesterday, he threw in a Door Flies Open reference:

HOWEVER, they did make one notable hire after anointing Marrone permanent interim head coach…

 (Ford Crown Victoria door flies open)

OHHHHHH SHIT YEAH HE’S BACK! Yes folks, the glory days of the Tom Coughlin era are here once more. Early meeting times! Hands on hips! Yelling!

I’m seeing that as a shout-out to his interview with Yeah Right‘s interview with Drew last Sunday.


Tonight’s sports:

  • MLB:
    • Indians at Red Sox – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN
    • Rays at Astros – 8:00PM | Sportsnet
  • MLS:
    • All-Star Game:
      • MLS All-Stars vs. Real Madrid – 9:00PM | FS1 / TSN4

There’s a live blog tomorrow night & sexiness on Friday, so I’ll see you this weekend, a three-day weekend in Canada.

MY VACATION GETS A HOLIDAY!

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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blaxabbathArmedandHammeredballsofsteelandfuryGame Time DecisionUnsurprised Recent comment authors
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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Gah … It’s not the heat the bothers me, it’s the people bitching about the heat.

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised
Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Another one that’s great no matter what, but much better if you know the lyrics….

ballsofsteelandfury

I realize I’m turning into the Old man yelling at the clouds but GODDAM music was great in the 80s!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

I once saw a pig in the front passenger seat on I-94. And I don’t mean a Wisconsin resident, I mean an honest to God pig.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

:turns to the crowd of women:
“Prove me wrong”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I should not be laughing so much at this.
Yet, I am.
….yet, I am.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Ray Lewis’s non-union Mexican equivalent?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Cool story bro alert!
This guy, Jake Jabs was a fixture on TV ads for his furniture stores, always using animals and family members, awkwardly of course. Not quite as hated as Dealin’ Doug car commercials, but close. One night some friends and I were at a bar and it turns out he is friends with the owner and frequents this place. Jabs gets up on stage and plays guitar and sings with some woman……. I was as close to murder that night as I would have been if Peter King would have showed. After some heckling I was asked to leave.

Cool story bro alerted over.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That’s not even a good story.

Don T

Did you badmouth his mom? His fashion sense? Was beastiality in the mix? Don’t leave us hanging man!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

I’ve always loved this song and never knew the words. You have just blown my mind.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Rock the Catbox goes really well with this song.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Funny you say that. Friend from college named his cat “Shareef” for that very reason.
He’s an idiot like us.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Probably in my top five fav all time songs.
Agreed about the words tho. When I first finally understood them all it was eye opening.

ArmedandHammered
ArmedandHammered

I just thought of a weird question. Instead of Alzheimer’s will Trump get Altzheimer’s where he forgets alternate memories?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m out of weed.
This is probably a safety issue for the general public locally.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’ve got some extra, whiskey and whisky too.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m thinking tequila tonight.
This could get ugly.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Moose; Hey, you wanna go to a party tonight? There will be a lot of drinking, a lot of fightin’ and a lot of fuckin’.
tWBS; Well, two out of three ain’t bad, I’m don’t really enjoy fighting that much. Where is it at?
Moose; My house.
tWBS; Really? Who all is showing up?
Moose; You and me…….

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

So yes; plenty of tequila too.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Ummmmm….I might have to clarify a point first.

Are you an angry pegger?

blaxabbath

I got a bunch of weed

theeWeeBabySeamus

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Did you get the novel finished?

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Nah. I’m just trying to create kontent for you assheads to dickjoke to.
I missed my chance at a publishing deal a few years ago so my trilogy and short stories shall die on the vine. Which is fine.

That stuff I write for me anyway. So, good enough.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

OK, ’cause in two hours ’bout all you could produce novel-wise is a Stephen King ……..

Senor Weaselo

Was the twist “It was his sled”? Because that’s already been done before.

theeWeeBabySeamus

There’s a “Rosebud” joke here, but I shouldn’t be the one to make it.
I’m already in enough trouble.

ArmedandHammered
ArmedandHammered

Considering some of the books I have seen on Amazon, you should try self-publishing there. I mean. After reading a lot of your kontent here, you would be a lot better than 80% of the stuff on there.

WCS

@midnight has an all Kids In the Hall panel.

Shogun Marcus

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Take my cheap +1.

Senor Weaselo

In “Good job dumbass” news I just realized I got on the wrong train, but fortunately I realized it at Columbus Circle (a one-stop detour) and not, like, 168th Street (go through the entire Upper West Side and Harlem). So I’ll still get home by 12. Maybe.

ballsofsteelandfury

Following a hot chick, huh?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Her name wasn’t Brittany, was it?

Senor Weaselo

I’ve never been that drastic, but it does work if we get off at the same stop. And also on the same bus. Which happened once. Added her on FB, saw she had a bf, so I didn’t pursue, never bumped into her on the bus again.

This was not one of those moments. The only thing I chased today was a Moltres on the way to rehearsal. (Which I caught, so score one for me.)

ballsofsteelandfury

You kids today crack me up. BF…

SMDH…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

she’s a fullback?

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

At a bar in Rhode Island, and both NESN and ESPN are on two TVs right next to each other. There have been multiple moments when I can’t tell them apart.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Did anyone read the transcript of the wsj Trump interview? Holy shit.

...

Let me guess: he sounds senile as fuck?

BrettFavresColonoscopy
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Alumni? I’m thinking fails, which at U*NC is…….

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
...

Hooboy I’m gassy tonight.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

Apparently tonight’s Last Week of @midnight has Kids in the Hall. Make of that what you will.

/Missed Harmon last night due to getting home late

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I haven’t gone outside all day and I have no excuse. So hopefully I won’t be back until most of you are asleep.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I spent about an hour today filling out 3 different 360 reviews. What are the odds that was a complete waste of time? 90%?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Easily.

...

Depends on the company but it’s definitely over 50%.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

In tactical lawyering news, I just learned that A Tribe Called Quest did the “right” thing and got clearance from Iggy Pop to use Walk on the Wild Side for Can I Kick It, but the clearance cost is 100% of whatever Can I Kick It earns. So ATCQ would have almost certainly been better off not getting the clearance, getting sued, and settling with Iggy. That’s fucked up.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

How did I miss that BDD interview?

Goddamnit. The Brightest Timeline is where dipshit falls into the ocean and his corpse is eaten by seals.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yeah, I hate Parcells, too

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I don’t know why I hate Brady so much, but I really do want him to die.

...

He’s a dumb jock who is celebrated as something special when he’s nothing more than a dumb jock.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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blaxabbath

Because he’s a cheater and the false mainstream narrative doesn’t just minimize his cheating but, worse yet, denies/justifies the cheating while applauding the results of his cheating and accredit that success to not-cheating.

ballsofsteelandfury

So, Trump?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Well, I suppose I should actually write something.
You fuckers have a good night.

Sharkbait

Boo actual work

theeWeeBabySeamus

LOL, right?

Sharkbait

Can’t be that important.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

Galldarn it I love me the pepperoncini pepper. Every time I make me a Ceasar I throw at least one into the drink.

Cheers!

blaxabbath

What drink is known as a Ceaser?

Sharkbait

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scotchnaut

[sighs]

I remember when I was a fellow kid…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Then you’re not old enough to have your memory completely fail. Good work.

Shogun Marcus

Oh hai!

LemonJello
LemonJello

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Good Evening.

scotchnaut

As Lou Reed/Velvet Underground said it so succinctly-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hugY9CwhfzE

Substitute pizza for heroin if you could please.

Thanks.

King Hippo

What you got against dragon chasin’??

scotchnaut

Nothing at all. But sometimes that dragon got himself an empty belly.

King Hippo

true DAT

theeWeeBabySeamus

blaxabbath

So I finally got around to redoing ‘my’ room (had to tear down a wall, relocate the fan, paint, etc) and was looking for some furniture online (I’m only ponying up for an overpriced desk chair) and, to make a long story short, Walmart.com has seriously put together a good search engine. I found the same armchair for $100 less than wayfair and free shipping.

Going to Walmart is a terrible experience that will never be lessened — but their take on e-commerce is actually pretty solid.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I totally loved the Crown Victoria and would rent them whenever I could. I drove across the Arizona desert in one at 110mph on cruise control and it was like sitting in someone’s living room. I would occasionally crack open a window just to hear the roar, and then shut it again and there would be silence.

I was introduced to the Crown Vic on a free ride in one many years ago, courtesy of the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department. I exercised my right to remain silent except for asking the question “what kind of car is this?”

scotchnaut

I want to know more about you.

herodotus450
herodotus450

He’s on a mission, from Gad

SonOfSpam

My grandparents had a ’77 Crown Vic that, if I remember right, was legally classified as a yacht. Each door (of course it was a 2 door) weighed approximately 3 tons.

nomonkeyfun

That is one thing Detroit was always the best at. Long distance comfort on a middle class budget. Crown Vic’s, caddies, Buicks, all great.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

A 1976 Crown Vic trunk hold two large bodies and a cooler.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Ah, so they tell me.

LemonJello
LemonJello

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I’m bored.

King Hippo

summer is only FOAR teh young and beautiful…

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

FLASH!

blackroseMD1

In what I’m sure will come as a shock to everyone, the Chargers lost a player for the year today.

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SonOfSpam

That’s unfortunate, because

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LemonJello
LemonJello

“BOLTMAN DEMANDS HIS SACRIFICES!”

/stomp stomp clap

King Hippo

Those femur drums ain’t gon’ skin theyselves…

Duchess

So the prognosis is negative?

King Hippo

So ends the chance FOAR “Ruuuunnn, Forrest!” merriment, until 2018 at least.

blaxabbath

This didn’t take off last year but Ep 1 was about the HOF Game.

https://doorfliesopen.com/index.php/2016/08/24/the-truth-is-out-there/

LemonJello
LemonJello

This didn’t take off last year

What are “things Olivia Munn said about her panties” ?

blaxabbath

I went to high school with Parsegian’s grandson (also named Ara) and will just say that their entire family is upstanding people.

SonOfSpam

Yeah, but they’re probably distantly related to the Kardashians.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Nothing wrong with that.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Even as a Bears fan, this is the better Sterling and the better Sharpe:

ballsofsteelandfury

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

For sure. WTF? Guess it is the rings.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

The play at 0:41 is beautiful.

How many times did he break his fingers because DongSlinger always had to throw as hard as he could?

Game Time Decision

Sterling Sharpe is the reason why i still cheer for the Packers. As a younger kid, loved watching him.