Yes, our long winter of discontent beckons. Blech.
We jump straight into the 10:00 window, there being no early match. Which kind of sucks. Anyway, NBCSN brings you Man U hosting the surprisingly competent, 9th position Seagulls of Brighton & Hove. CNBC has alternate viewing, in the form of Spurs hosting dire West Brom. Barcodes v. Moose Hornets on NBC Gold is a much better bet.
5th position Redshite host resurgent 3rd place Chelsea in the 12:30 big NBC spotlight dance, which for once lives up to its moniker. I will at least stream it, since the local Raleigh, NC network affiliate is showing Boston College/Syracuse JV action instead. Sad!
Sunday brings us three fairly intriguing fixtures, with the 8:30 opener – Everton’s visit to St. Mary’s (Soton) only available on NBC Gold. Both these sides (16th and 14th) are on poor form, and in need of answers. Anyway, I shall be watching and hoping…and still waiting for a permanent manager.
As for matches normal humans might watch, 6th position Arsenal visit 7th place Burnley (9:00, CNBC), followed by runaway freight train Man City’s visit to #10 Huddersfield Town (11:00, NBCSN). One expects the visitor “name side” to hold serve, but each match could be more difficult sledding than the untrained eye might expect.
On to the full, bountiful JV slate!
Georgia at Georgia Tech (Noon, ABC)
There Will Be Rushing Attempts.
Ohio State at Michigan (Noon, Fox)
/imagine picture of lukewarm pool of jism
Florida State at Florida (Noon, ESPN)
Fun Fact! Both these sides are 4-6, and both have re-scheduled patsy games next week, while real teams play for conference supremacy. One of them will get bowl qualification out of said sad exercise. The other…just MOAR realization of just how deep the hole is.
Indiana at Purdue (Noon, ESPN2)
Two 5-6 teams that hate each other. Yes, please!!
Alabama at Auburn (3:30, CBS)
Match of the Day. DUH. Winner takes all, and yes, I believe War Damn Eagle gets into the playoffs if it wins out. I also believe Roll Damn Tide gets in at 11-1 with a loss here or to UGA. Spoiler alert – I don’t believe either hypothetical loss happens, leaving Bama the only SEC PAAAAAWWWWWLLLL!!! representative.
Iowa State at Kansas State (3:30, ESPN2)
The Undead Bill Snyders will probably lose here, just to make BDSM State folk even angrier. Cyclones remain one of the year’s better stories.
West By God Virginia at Oklahoma (3:45, ESPN)
I don’t wanna say “trap game” but….FUCKING TRAP GAME.
Vanderbilt at Tennessee (4:00, SECN)
Oh, the humiliation of it. To be 0-7 in SEC play, and face similarly 0-7 Vandy…at home, on the last day of the season, each with nothing to play for. Could easily be the lowest single point of Volunteer sports history. I will watch more of this than I care to admit, because I’m really fucking weird.
Clemson at South Carolina (7:30, ESPN)
There are usually fights in this one, more than sufficient reason to tune in. Rednecks at night, y’all.
Texas A&M at LSU (7:45, ESPN2)
I wish I attended a university where a football coach could enter the season finale a ded man walking at fucking 7-4 in the toughest division of the toughest conference in JV NFL.
Notre Dame at Stanford (8:00, ABC)
Hey, everybody, it’s the one time a year I pull for boring-ass Stanford.
Washington State at Washington (8:00, Fox)
Apple Cup, y’all! Neat name, neat rivalry. Wazzu has already beaten the Troi Boiz once, so they really need this win as a major step forward for their program. Huskies can only play spoiler in favour of the Trees.
Colorado at Utah (10:00, FS1)
Not a great tweaker match-up, but at least it’s 5-6 v. 5-6, and Team Secular Big Love always gives a good effort.
On the one hand it looks like Jim Harbuagh is gonna lose. On the other hand, it looks like Urban Meyer is gonna win. If I had a third hand I’d be using it to tie a noose.
You still have OSU losing Wisconsin to look forward to?
-sigh-
I guess.
/kicks three rocks with his three feet.
/ falls on three asscheeks for kicking all three feet at the same time.
Three yards and a cloud of Rust Belt!
I think “A Cloud Of Rust Belt” is the name of the hot new heroin brand sweeping the Mid-Atlantic.
For those of yinz who hadn’t heard, my brother-in-law was killed in a car crash on Sunday. We’ve been in West Virginia, trying to help as best we can. It hasn’t exactly been easy, but, I suppose it could be a whole lot worse.
damn….
/Opens “Terry Glenn Jokes” Folder
//Ctrl-A
///Delete
////YES I”M SURE I WANT TO DELETE THEM FUCK YOU WINDOWS
/////Pats self on back for condolent gesture
Praying for your family, WCS.
Were gonna be here for ya WCS. Yea!
Sorry to hear it WCS. Condolences to the family.
you and the Missus sound like a good team, you’ll get through it together because that’s what families do
Hang in, dude.
Best wishes for all involved.
realistically, tOSU just has to not turn it over, nor Meeechigan a punt, yeah?
We’ve replaced this football game with an All Commercials feed, let’s see if anyone notices…
I NOTICED YOU FUCKWADS!!
They were supposed to wait until tomorrow for the pro games.
at least I heeded the siren song of GAMBLOR so Duke/Wake Forest gives me a game worth watching
Programming Assistants: “Can we sell this OSU/Mich tilt on the historical angle for the 127th time?”
Programming Director: [wakes up out of deep sleep] “Sure. Sure. Great idea! Where’s my pillow?”
How does ohio state not just have a kicker who can kick it out of the endzone every tim?
https://techsolidarity.org/resources/congressional_howto.html
More words that I be reading….https://www.dailydot.com/layer8/nationalize-internet-net-neutrality/
Last one. its about Paw Patrol!!!! that Children’s Cartoon!
https://thewalrus.ca/inside-the-all-consuming-world-of-paw-patrol/
The problem with nationalizing the Internet is the one big flaw in any comprehensive program that could be adopted in the U.S. (e.g. Medicare For All) – the stupid and evil shit that will happen when a piece of shit like Donald Trump is elected President.
https://www.dailymotion.com/video/xccvu8
Handles like a freaky european Gymnast. LOL!
Uh oh…
“Ongoing Meniscus Issue” sounds like either an overly pretentious indie rock band, or some kind of really fucked up amputee-pregnancy porn.
Still has to be better than dashboard fucking confessional.
JT Barrett’s meniscus pops in and out? That’s not good.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meniscus_(anatomy)
Lady Shogun says she can post a video of her knee doing that at will.
/seen it
//no.
I’ve been off the reservation for a few days. Did I miss anything?
I’m on the DFO Suicide/Homicide Watch.
Hippo came out as trans-elephant. Aside from that? Not much.
NO MOAR Bret Bielema REI pup tent mumus on the Pig Sooey sidelines. That was fun to mock whilst it lasted.
Pencils that are in the shape of Cigarettes. Lighters that are pencil sharpeners. Cool!
http://incrediblethings.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/Lighter-Pencil-Sharpener.jpg
/ sees Barrett reach for knee.
“No…”
/ sees Barrett adjust his knee
“No…”
/ sees Barrett go down and Fox Injury Music turn on
/ looks up to Heaven
“Good one,”
so much fer not spending money, Balls. Assume you will start getting DNC-like fundraising e-mails…
Fact: Jumanji 2’s tagline is “Welcome To The Jungle”.
Axl Rose: [collects $200, doesn’t go to jail]
Nope, nope, everything is fine.
It don’t mattuh, none uh dis madduhs
/need to set macro for this
extra point is nae good!
And the comeback is on as ECU pulls to within 50.
LMFAO
Liverpool vs. Chelsea is a Draw 1-1. Whatever.
BUT GLORIOUS FULHAM HAS WON 2 GAMES IN A ROW!
position in table?
It is only november. We were way worse off last year.
better than your last update
“Ar U Fuking kiding me? Thats nt Brodrick Daggerfiel dooin that fer reelz!”
-YouTube commenter
You can totaly see the cgi
I always assumed it was an intentional nod to the stuntman who had to actually do these tricks.
So according to my TV’s Closed Captioning, Satan created Michigan’s Defense Scheme.
PFT Commentator: When ur hard count is more effective then your rhythm method
:large
Which daughters eventually start doing porn?
Yes.
“Start?”
-Roy Moore
grass in the field ,, amirite??
– Roy Moore’s 50 “pastors”
For me, I’m thinking “That poor, poor wife. All those childbirths.”
Eventually, I expect that sweet sweet laserface monehs to fund a compound large enough for them and the Duggars to live, interbreed, and start their own race of advanced humans.
Six toes is cool, right?
Evolution? HUH?? Fuck you!!
i would spend good money to see Harbaugh take a swing at Urban
Yea William!!!!!!!! Chelsea with the equalizer!!!!
Out of the blue for the blues!!!! Oh yEa!!!!
That’s Kick Catch Interference?!
A reminder for Seamus-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJWlBfo5Oj0
I’ve not missed the bowl in at least a coupla days.
Sheeeesh, take a drunk shit in the hallway just one time and you get labeled a hall shitter.
Christonacracker….even as a UGa fan, this GT game in Atlanta is….well….let’s just say Sherman wasn’t wrong.
“A genius by the name of Gus Johnson is paired with something called Joel Crap. Did… did you need more evidence that reinforces my theory?”
-Freddy Nietzsche
-[Catcalls]
-She-Hulk
Joel Crap?
(see what piano playing and money gets you, fellers?)
She still looks like she did when she was married to him 25-30 years ago.
Scary part is….so does he.
Piano. Money. Listen to ol’ tWBS gang. I won’t steer you wrong.
Eep.
But, no, you’re right. I haven’t ever learned to ride a bike. I think learning to play a piano would be more useful.
Except he can’t sing everything in the same keys he could (like Angry Young Man) so he transposes the keyboard and plays everything in the original key.
Dammit Hazard y u gotta be offsides…. shit.
Errands run, beerz procured, pants shed.
/looks at games
//crap
Shoulda done that last one on the porcelain.
Oh, I spoke too soon. Memphis beating the everloving dogshit out of ECU. Woo Hoo!!!
See Hippo? It’s kismet. Everything’s coming up Paxton this weekend.
Holy shit. How have I never noticed this before?
Just pulled his latest release off iTunes-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zcq_xLi2NGo
Hehehe.
Obligatory.
Coach putting Fàbregas in for Chelsea. Down 1-0.
Smells good.
*Could be mixing products and names up…. again.
Who is Satan and how do I serve him?
Nick Saban, and be a five-star running back recruit.
“If you could buy season tickets to the Islanders back in 2006, that’d be great. ALL HAIL ME!”
-Miroslav Satan
LeSean McCoy and however you want cause you’re not getting a tip either way.
I offered him my soul after the Reds and Bengals lost in their ’12 playoffs but even he said he can’t do that kind of miracles.
Lleyton Hewitt and try to put it wide with plenty of topspin.
The only ACC I am interested in watching is German heavy metal band Accept.
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Ohio State about to show off its spelling skills.
their smrt
Its harder than it looks. All it takes is one Mellophone player forget how to spell or tripping and that entire chain of 100-200 marchers is going down like dominos.
You know that sousaphone player is thinking, “So, I easn’t good enough for you, Dad. I didn’t play middle school football, like you. Who’s on the field for Michigan..”
Hey. I marched on the Indianapolis Colts field. I ended my Freshman Year in band in the center of the Colts helmet logo in midfield.
Shit. Liverpool scored.
A series of accidents at the Mike Pence cloning facility?
Maybe the Anderson Cooper aging chart?
Excellent.
That envelope of “lettuce” that Urban Meyer sent to the refs after the first quarter seems to be paying off.
[slips an envelope of kale to the refs]
-Oregon Ducks head coach Willie Taggart
Wow. BLEERGH really, really hate the Maize and Blue.
https://sports.theonion.com/nick-saban-undergoes-cosmetic-procedure-to-unfold-arms-1820735665
Not sure about the current Michigan qb but you damn well should be ascared of the children of O’Korn.
Khildren of the Korn seems like it would be a great name for a quasi-terrorist group, like the Panther Moderns.
Or maybe The Weather Aboveground?
we want plates.
Reminds me of Carne Asada Fries from Santana’s….before they changed their name to Fresh MXN
The steak appears to be modestly seasoned with just salt, pepper and some sprigs of fresh rosemary.
Fuck. All I have for breakfast is yogurt.
That’s almost exactly the poutine I had last night!
Dear Lord I’m salivating
Bad spot
Why are you yelling at the dog?
This Ohio State team, I call them Boo, because every time I look they go passive and every time I look away they go aggressive.
Why is Ohio State wearing white?
2nd half. Go chelsea!!
If I told you I was watching the game I’d be lion.
I do love the gratuitous tits on Stripes.
Eh, I’m not that big a fan of John Candy.
Not a true Canadian, eh?
The Great Outdoors muthafuka!
1. Train you eyes to focus on the important stuff.
2. You have no respect for John Candy?