Your “We Are All Jags Fans Today” AFC Championship Game Open Thread

Are you ready? Last Sunday was oh-so-glorious and I’m not sure how it can be topped but the bowels of my being are telling me it will be. Perhaps that’s last night’s chili talking, I’ve no idea. What the heckfire am I waiting for? TO THE GAME!

Jacksonville/New England:

Some football fans down Florida way are talking about The Coughlin Effect transforming this team. “So what is The Coughlin Effect?”, you may ask. Well, as a Giants fan I can tell you it involves not wearing hats in meetings, setting the clocks in the practice facility five minutes ahead and treating any and all injuries with bloodletting-you know, basic crotchety old man stuff. I’ve no doubt that when he was first told that players were kneeling during the anthems his gut reaction was to foam at the mouth.

Injuries:

Tom Brady has some stitches in his paw-paw. Will he play? (yes) Will he wear a glove? (maybe) Will it affect his game? (no) Do I like question marks? (most assuredly)

Stratergizering:

Rumour has it that Adele would like to see Jalen Ramsay on the Gronkster but the Jags D usually covers te’s with a safety (Church/Gipson) or Myles Jack. Besides the fact that Ramsey is out-weighed by a good fifty pounds, what of Brandin Cooks? I can’t see the Jags pulling something special out of their game plan hat today.

Here’s a Problem:

Their names are Hurns, Westbrook, Cole and Lee. That’s not the name of a law firm, that’s the Jags receiving corpse. If the team falls behind by two scores it’s not going to be pretty. That said, I think the speedy Westbrook just might grab a TD on some sort of trickery dickery dock.

Old Adage is old:

War. Won. Trenches. You know how it goes but if Jacksonville’s d-line of Ngakoue, (another strip-sack maybe?) Campbell, Jackson, Dareus and Fowler play as they have been recently the timing that Brady & Co. depend so much upon will be jiggered and they’ll be out of their comfort zone.

Have at ‘er darlings-it’s all yours now.

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Horatio Cornblower

There is, by the way, zero chance that Gronk isn’t back out for the second half.

Duchess

Gronk could be running around calling himself “Batman” and they would like him back up.

Senor Weaselo

It’s happening again, isn’t it.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yup

Spur

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tomsellecksmoustache

No chance that Gronk doesn’t return to this one.

Old School Zero

That drive will give Coughlin something to redden his cheeks about

...

Well at least it can’t be 28-3 now.

Spur

fuck it. if this means Gronk is gone, worth it.

Smithchez

Yep. That’s what they do.

The Maestro

BACK IN THE GAME MOTHERFUCKERS WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

theeWeeBabySeamus

LOL

Redshirt

♫ The fix is … … … on ♫

Old School Zero

“Rob, how’s your head? Feeling okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, bro, I’m good.”
“We gotta check you for a concussion. Spell your last name.”
“B-l-u-t-a-r-s-k-y”

LemonJello

“M-O-O-N, that spells Gronk.”

JustStopDude

Oh thank god its his head…Gronk is fine…

blaxabbath

I declare this…BANNER

King Hippo

that was just fucking stupid

...

GUH THAT BALL WASN’T CATCHABLE

tomsellecksmoustache

Doctor: “Rob, what number comes after 68?”

Spur

fuck this.

blaxabbath

There’s the refs we all know and love!

Smithchez

THIS IS WHAT THEY DO FOR FUCK’S SAKE

litre_cola

I got an oh my goodness blow once, it was great.

Dick E. Phuck

Ref protocols have been activated.

Gratliff

fuuuuuucking here it comes

litre_cola

I personally would like another shot at Brady et co. Howevah we still have to fill all the Foles.

Petronel

Oh goddammit

blaxabbath

Best deal I’ve seen made all year.

theeWeeBabySeamus

So how does one tell if Gronk is concussed? He starts making sense when he talks or what?

blaxabbath

I like Gronk but…..good.

Spur

BS. Gronk has liquid brain.

Duchess

That roughness was indeed necessary

Horatio Cornblower

Good flag if it knocks Gronk out of the game.

King Hippo

WORTH IT

fleshwound_NPG

gronk ded

Gratliff

Here we go

litre_cola

Gronk ded?

theeWeeBabySeamus

He was not out of bounds. That clock should be running.

King Hippo

merde

blaxabbath

The Microsoft Surface: We use it to hold up the game but not overturn calls.

Jesus Fuck Christ. THIS is why I told my wife we are not doing this kid a favor by bringing him into this world.

clint greasewood

Commercial, 1 play then more commercials

Smithchez

“Young Sheldon: whhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?!”

blaxabbath

Looking forward to Toddler Sheldon in a few years.

Horatio Cornblower

I want to order a drone strike into that “What’s A Computer?” shit’s backyard.

LemonJello

Sorry, StrikeCom is closed due to the government shut-down, perhaps you could check with the CIA’s
“contractors”?

King Hippo

Keep the pressure on! Hit him, and make the fuckers punt.

blaxabbath

Coughlin needs to fire Doug and move down to the sideline.

...

Wait if the Patriots’ kryptonite isn’t Eli Manning but… Tom Coughlin?

Horatio Cornblower

Better throw juice boxes filled with piss and vinegar all over the sidelines and cover all your bases.

litre_cola

It isn’t cold enough for redface.

Spur

kill them here Jags.

blaxabbath

That kid is letting a woman show him how to drive?

Blind leading the blind.

Brocky

Ffs, who needs halftime adjustments when ne has the refs

LemonJello

That’s what Patricia’s pinning his hopes on.

clint greasewood

Though fucking helmets the Jags should go the Bengals route and embrace there animals print.

Smithchez

Okay, assholes. This is their specialty. THEY WILL GO HURRYUP. BE FUCKING PREPARED!

blaxabbath

Alex Smith + Marin Sanchez?

makeitsnowondem

Is Tony Romo doing this broadcast remotely from Tijuana? He sounds hammered.

...

Honestly, this is a good thing.

Mr. Ayo

Why didn’t they let that run down before punting?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Doh!!!!!!

King Hippo

oh, fucking idiots

Sharkbait

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The Maestro

Seconded.

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