Were you not entertained yesterday? I certainly was. We had safeties, plenty of derpage, surprises, comebacks, new stars (if only for one week) and the usual disappointments. All in all, a great bag of tricks. I’ll throw a few cogitations at you. Think of it as an addendum to the much-beloved “Hippo Thoughts”.
Fallout:
-sure glad I didn’t invest in Baker Mayfield. I know he’ll be just fine but his line is going to make things rough for him here and there.
-next week’s Bills/Jizziants game is going to redefine the word ‘uglyball’.
-slam the brakes on this Hollywood Brown guy. He only had 15 snaps all game and the Ravens aren’t going to reverse direction and fling the ball all day all of a sudden. He got a bit lucky. Look for major regression next week.
-Alex Mattison. He’s got major talent and the Vikes would be wise to develop a package of plays for him rather than just use him as a fill-in for Cook.
-I’ve said this to anyone who’d listen and several who didn’t: Calvin Ridley is such enormous value in fantasy. Julio will always get the best cb and safety help to boot. That leaves Calvin on a lesser talent and he flourishes. “But he only had a couple of big games last year, that’s why his TD total is inflated”, you say. I say he scored 10 as a rookie finding his way in the offense and will be even better this year. Matt Ryan trusts him and the Falcons will be throwing all year long. Don’t be afraid to play this guy.
-I predicted that Jordan Howard would be left behind at some point but week 1 was a surprise.
-congrats to those that played Desean! You’ll be paid back next week with 2 catch, 23 yard outing. Such is the nature of that beast.
-Mustache Minshew’s fall back to reality is going to be even more painful than a broken collarbone.
-don’t pull the plug on Damien Williams just yet but it sure doesn’t look promising.
TO THE GAMES!
Texans/Saints:
Houston’s O-line gave up a league-high 62 sackeroos last year. The Tonsil (intentional) trade might make a wee bit of difference but that line play is affecting qb Watson’s development. Them Saints are psyched about a UFDA they found by the name of Deonte Harris, a wee lad that goes 5’6″, 170 and played DII football at Assumption College. He holds the all divisions record for most career return TD’s at 14. You know what they say about players that ball out at Assumption…
Den/Oak:
You know what fans of the Broncos new qb are called? Flaccolytes. (I thunked that up all on my own! I probably read it somewhere and forgot about it ) Most folks slept on rb Lindsay during draft season because of the yapping about Freeman but I don’t buy it at all. I guess we’ll see if the hubbub around te Darren Waller was justified.
Pluck those strings folks!
“Coach, how many penalties are we allowed again?”
So, 37 seconds and one time out. hmmm.
BLEEEERGH has SHANK’LOR in a headlock.
Refs legit gonna be murdered tonight
Just another number in New Orleans.
I could use another td in fantasy. Just saying
Fucking LOL
Oh dude you DED
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Oh yeah. Saints fans gonna take that real good. Right into my veins baby.
Bahahahahhaha
HAIL BLEERGH!!!!!!
OT! No, not OT!
The fuck was that kick?????
Fucking what
OHSHIT rekick
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
PRAISE BLEERGH!!!!
AHAHAHAHAHAHA
— Blair Walsh
Abolish kickers
…so apparently changing the channel was a mistake
LMAO FUCK THE SAINTS
Woah.
WOW!
HOly shit!
GEAUX FUCK YOURSELF
Oo it got real quiet
Oh look, more white trash just doing white trash things.
https://twitter.com/mike_pence/status/1171098905817337857?s=20
I could set my TV’s white level with those photos
Booger sounds natural in the 2 man booth. He’s not bad
Easily my fave now. Wasn’t tough given the competition but I do enjoy his musings.
that’ll do, pig
Why did I just hear Stone Temple Pilots in a fucking car commercial?
Won’t be joining you all for the late game, I’m sleepier than a Darren Sharper house guest. I’ll catch up on the dick jokery, puns and sexiness with my morning coffee.
Later, Taters!
Ted Ginn? Junior?
that oughta do it.
Ted ginn 2019
*2020. He wants Biden as his running mate
Ginn-Sproles 2020 for Lollipop Guild Presidency
this will be snapped right before the 2:00 drill, which means was wise of Buttchinki to save his timeouts
/but Breesus outfoxed ’em
Watching the Yankees get ready to eliminate the Red Sox from AL East contention and the Boston faithful are bedecked in Patriots gear because they’re a bunch of front-running fuckwits.
as a Donks fan, can assure you that’s the best open-field tackle Bradley Roby has ever made.
another plus – you can tell that Booger actually LIKES football. His enthusiasm (when it comes out) is natural, not manufactured bullshit.
3rd try here:
Sweet jeezus.
Tunsil just got abused on that play.
like a Bahstahn altah boy
When Spotlight won best picture, I was surprised because I’d never heard of it. When I read what it was about, it made sense why they didnt advertise it in Boston…
Guess what happened when the director tried to get a movie made about pedophiles in Hollywood, though.
You cant take the Miami out of the player
Houston’s offensive line is…not good.
STILL
Something something Houston and gaping holes something…
maybe keep throwing to Hopkins
punch and counter-punch
She’s making something grow, alright.
Riley Reid. She has the cure for that as well.
unbury your 500s!
https://gfycat.com/heavyelectrickentrosaurus-official-minogue-kylie-cant-head-get
Jeebus, what a throw and catch.
12th man penalty
“That’s just not enough”
–Houston