Well, let’s see what transpired today:
- Trent Williams’ rights weren’t traded from the [Redacteds], so instead he chose to report, ending his holdout.
- NFL Network’s Tom Pelissero noted that the left tackle is due $5.824 million in base salary for the rest of 2019 (plus $15,624 for each game he’s active).
- The Falcons kicked kicker Matt Bryant to the curb.
- Signing 2017 Charger Younghoe Koo to a likely game-to-game contract.
- The Patriots released kicker Mike Nugent, presumably for infecting Bill Belichick with Cat Scratch Fever.
- They have no backup, as Nugent was signed when Stephen Gostkowski went on IR in Week Five.
- The Rams sent Aqib Talib, his injury & his contract to the Dolphins, plus a 5th-round pick, in exchange for a 7th-round pick in 2022.
- The Dolphins basically bought a fifth-rounder to pay the balance of Talib’s $4.2 million contract this season.
- The Rams’ pick was originally Baltimore’s in 2020.
- Borrowing again from Tom Pelissero of NFL Network, the Dolphins’ ‘strategy’ seems to be this:
- The Dolphins basically bought a fifth-rounder to pay the balance of Talib’s $4.2 million contract this season.
The #Dolphins paid Ryan Tannehill a $5M bonus to facilitate a trade that got them a 4th-round pick.
They paid Robert Quinn a ~$1.1M bonus to facilitate a trade that got them a 6th-round pick.
Now they'll pay Aqib Talib ~$4.2M to get a 5th-round pick.
Negative assets –> assets https://t.co/SejT0S4OIB
— Tom Pelissero (@TomPelissero) October 29, 2019
Other NFL News:
- Everyone fires the Whis – Ken Whisenhunt has been released from his Chargers OC job.
- It’s clear Anthony Lynn is trying to shake things up in an easily winnable division.
- The Chargers currently sit third in the AFC West, but thanks to the Chiefs’ rough patch, they are only three games back.
- It’s clear Anthony Lynn is trying to shake things up in an easily winnable division.
- Andy Dalton has been benched, in favour of rookie Ryan Finley.
- That lucky bastard gets a bye week to prepare for a Week 10 matchup with the Ravens.
- According to Bengals coach Zac Taylor,
- “This is not an easy decision to make. We’re not 0-8 because of Andy. Andy has worked harder than anyone else in this building to help us win football games. [It’s j]ust a decision I made.”
- Major League Football, a league that tried to start up in 2016 but aborted that attempt, is aiming to start in April 2020.
- Just after the XFL season ends!
- According to PFT, MLFB plans to launch with six teams, with a season opening not long after the next draft.
- In a sign that it just, maybe, might possibly actually begin play, they purchased all of the AAF’s equipment – saving $2.0 million versus buying brand new.
- No word on when they might have a player draft.
General noise:
The death knell for Deadspin might have begun today. With their corporate overlords extolling a “stick to sports” edict, the site has spent a majority of the day engaging in self-immolation – reprising old stories; encouraging boycotts of online advertisers; publishing pithy observations. They haven’t published anything since 1:00PM ET. It’s not going to be as swift as when KSK decided it was finished, but it is a lot more public, as people are using social media to make various & sundry points about the state of modern online journalismism. It’s been noticed by quite a number of “traditional” news sites like the Washington Post & New York Times.
This was all set off yesterday, according to The Daily Beast, with a memo from G/O Media editorial director Paul Maidment, advising
“To create as much great sports journalism as we can requires a 100% focus of our resources on sports. And it will be the sole focus,” Maidment said. “Deadspin will write only about sports and that which is relevant to sports in some way. Where such subjects touch on sports, they are fair game for Deadspin. Where they do not, they are not,” Maidment wrote. “We have plenty of other sites that write about politics, pop culture, the arts, and the rest, and they’re the appropriate place for such work.”
According to CNN, G/O Media is currently owned by private equity firm Great Hill Partners, which bought the properties from Univision, where they had been known as Gizmodo Media Group. Most of the sites that are currently part of the portfolio were part of the group originally known as Gawker Media, which went bankrupt after wrestler Hulk Hogan sued the company in a lawsuit bankrolled by billionaire Peter Thiel.
In response, people have been finding out corporate overlords kinda suck. Deputy Editor Barry Petchesky was fired Tuesday for “not sticking to sports,” he announced in a tweet.
https://twitter.com/barry/status/1189224064788979712
And management has responded in kind.
Statement from G/O Media editorial director Paul Maidment on the backlash from Deadspin staffers, which led to the firing of deputy editor Barry Petchesky pic.twitter.com/qVywhOFTKK
— Kerry Flynn 🐶 (@kerrymflynn) October 29, 2019
That’s where things stand at the time I put this to bed. I don’t know who among the Kommentariat cares, but I figured it was interesting enough to synopsize here for discussion tonight.
Tonight’s sports:
- MLB:
- World Series: Game 6: Not-Expos at Astros – 8:00PM | FOX / Sportsnet
- Astros up 3-2.
- World Series: Game 6: Not-Expos at Astros – 8:00PM | FOX / Sportsnet
- NHL:
- Lightning at Rangers – 7:30PM | NBCSN
- Oilers at Red Wings – 7:30PM | Sportsnet1
- MLS:
- Los Angeles FC vs. Seattle Sounders – 10:00PM | ESPN / TSN
- NBA:
- Mavericks at Nuggets – 9:00PM | TSN2
Not a lot on, but most of it looks pretty good. Here’s hoping the Astros can put things away tonight. Looking forward to the MLS footy matchup when I get home from school.
Underwater scotch.
“Get out of my dreams and get onto my gaming laptop!” – Eli Manning, wearing a Gryffindor scarf
He finally has some free time.
And there’s Joe Torre, on cue, saying that a clearly wrong call was, in fact, the right call.
Torre is a horse’s ass.
Also, since BC brought that movie up, I still contend that Burgess meredith’s outtakes are some of the funniest fucking things on the planet
https://youtu.be/hh81LMz1sPo
Joe Torre should star in Grumpy Old Men 4: Get Off My Lawn with… help me here. Buck Showalter?
Lou Holtz?
I’d have to say “Bob Costas” based on the amount of stinkeye he gives me when he sees me walking my dog past his place.
Wait, did I say “stinkeye”? I meant “pinkeye”.
Name dropping now, are we, mister Hollywood? Good choice, same as holtz. I thought don zimmer but I want him for my reboot of Archie bunker. He’ll be gay, yes. With David Allen Grier. The neighbour is John Gibbons because I love Gibby.
Ha ha, no, not name dropping – I have no idea where Bob Costas lives. It’s funny that you thought I was serious, though – my buddy John C. Reilly is going to get a kick out of that when I mention it to him over beers at The Morrison tomorrow night during Game 7.
I’ve been led to believe you’re all lawyers and jet-setters and the like. I assumed you lived in those kind of neighbourhoods. Well, I’m not even going to bother offering you this exciting investment opportunity that is 190% guaranteed to double, triple, or even quintuple your money! !.
Firmly believe that the lawyers here are of the Lionel Hutz variety
Nah, you gotta have ambition and drive to be either of those things. I’ve neither.
Gotta save Zim for the reboot of Celebrity Death Match, where he can avenge himself against Pedro.
…. there was a part 3?
I don’t get out to the cinema much. I just guessed at 3 or 4.
Fair enough, there’s so many sequels out now, easy to get lost.
I only remember the first one cuz of how much my grandpa loved it, and the outtakes I posted above.
I only have the most vague recollections of the sequel, just cuz it was meredith’s last film
I did not know that. He made some movies. Without him Rocky isn’t shit. We’d still be talking about Raging Bull. Ann-Margret still looked damn good in it. That’s what I remember.
dan shaughnessy
Joe Torre was a genius at managing personalities but terrible at tactics, and his performance as VP For Making Excuses For Terrible MLB Decisions has done nothing to change my opinion of him as an amiable doofus who lucked into an unbelievable position in the twilight of an otherwise mediocre career.
I think you’re right. But even so I like managers who don’t over-manage and trust their guys to get it done and will let a young guy take a shot in a big spot because he finds out if those guys have it and he gets their trust forever by doing it. Like Gibby. And I cheer for a guy who looks like joe who lucks into anything as great as joe did.
Grumble grumble I can’t believe you assholes have missed such an obvious answer here grumble grumble
It’s too bad he couldn’t get the complete game victory.
But since they saved those 6 pitches by pulling him after 104 he can give them 2 innings tomorrow!
Can Trump come down to get boo-ed in Houston tomorrow night? I’d even approve of the waste of tax money for him to fly down in AF1, as long as the booing was lusty enough.
Can we really trust Texas to boo him? Houston ain’t Austin
Houston had an out lesbian mayor for 6 years. Don’t rush to judgment just because Texas.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Annise_Parker
They’re not mutually exclusive. I’d vote any day for a lesbian/whatever for mayor or any other office but I wouldn’t vote for a green new deal and identity politics. I don’t get the choice, though, to be fair. I’m in Canada and we choose between cheddar and marble cheddar.
Keeping with the apparent theme of the night, your month of macabre is from slither (2006) an underrated flick directed by james Gunn
There are a lot or weird scenes and affects, and by that I mean good and entertaining, in that movie.
Maybe they should bring in Doomore.
So I haven’t been watching the game, but I did get a. Notification on it.
Que?
The shitty umpiring theme from the regular season reared it’s head again tonight.
It’s been garbage this series. And to be fair I though it was really good in the ALCS.
Wait, so this is the 666th World Series game? Figures the team with Cheetoh Mussolini as it’s current most well-known resident will win.
That Nationals fans deserve this series after what they did – as far as I’m concerned they are now “America’s Fans”.
That was orgasmic.
Tonight on Hannity: Why Does Major League Baseball Hate Our Duly Elected President? Our investigation into the Deep State’s takeover of our nation’s pastime!
Evening. Why the shit are they making a movie about adult Danny Torrance?
I read this book and there is no porn in it.
In space, no one can hear you cream.
Nice.
Because Stephen king made a book about adult Danny torrence.
I love that King isn’t just retiring quietly in his old age
Who asked him?
Also a chance to stick it to Stanley Kubrick
The book was actually pretty good. I’d given up on King a long time ago because he went through a long string of pumping out shit books year after year, just like most other horror authors. He actually manged something decent with this one though.
Come December, there better be a place I can read Drew’s annual evisceration of the Williams Sonoma catalog.
I suppose of all the DS writers, he’ll be the one that still has a writing platform after this implosion.
And he’s mainly been doing GQ and Medium, so…long live journalism?
Seriously. No JAMBOROO this week?
Apparently… Fuck, my life is an empty trash can being blown down the road when a cold front blows through town.
Should I be watching the based ball, or Great Pumpkin?
Or tentacle porn as per Moose?
Tentacles feel good man!
In case you are doing some xmas shopping:
I’m sure that’s a very interesting “Chess Set”.
Dang, I thought they were bookends.
It can be all three.
It IS Tuesday.
There is also tentacle tickle porn, apparently.
I’m kinda proud of the fact that I’ve seen more images lampooning tentacle porn than actual tentacle porn
Game 7 after all? We can only hope.
And the Nats have the road-field advantage.
I’mma stealing this for tomorrow.
I imagine that some time in the past the “Visiting Team wins every game” scenario has played out. Too drunk to check, myself.
It has not. It hasn’t even happened that a road team has won six of the seven.
Dang, I feel as much a witness to history as I did when I watched JFK lying in state, Neal Armstrong stepping on to the surface of the moon, and the Jets beating the Colts in SB III.
Nor has it happened in the NHL or NBA (in 7-game series). It has, however, happened in the American Hockey League final, the Calder Cup. The winning coach was a young bemulleted man named Barry Melrose.
And now you know… the rest of the story!
(I only know this from Slate’s Hang Up And Listen podcast)
MLB is under criticism for boring baseball, juiced balls, impromptu high volume press conferences with assistant GMs. If I know my pro sports script writers, the Nats will win in game 7. It’s the most satisfying storyline right now. Especially with the departure of a high priced free agent. The owners probably really liked that in the table read.
Sherzer heroically wins the game. Is he starting? Or he gets the save. Maybe extra innings. He can barely lift his arm because he’s been pitching so good. Pointing to the cancer-ridden boy in the stands who tweeted some trite bullshit, he promises to spend the rest of his days raising money to sue people who discriminate against people with weird eyes and you can’t stop looking at them. Osuna gets hit by a hot dog thrown in celebration by a fan. The hot mustard blinds him temporarily and he falls into the dugout woodchipper. We find out later that he did that thing more than once. It makes the parade even better.
You knew that was going to happen.
Indeed.
I am confused, horrified, and… turned on?
It can EASILY be all three.
Man, that reminds me of the liberty call my ship made in Pattaya Beach Thailand back in January 1983. Good times and cool story, bro.
Review that!
KARMA
Baseball has a Tuck Rule game now.
“Thank god no one remembers me.”
-D. Denkinger
No, that’s that RuPaul’s Drag Race show.
Aw come on!
Did I just hear “Try not to fuck this up” on the WS broadcast?
Was it Joe Buck looking in a mirror?
Is Hank Azaria in the booth?
And you fellas and gals are far superior to some dead skin site. They have essentially one point of view between them. I’m sure I’ve got different opinions on lots of things from most of you but you’ve been nothing but gracious (even with the ever present threat that I will murder litrecola) and I literally do not comment anywhere else. Even if I could get this flip phone to open a second web site.
I am decidedly NOT superior to dead skin. How dare you.
It is REALLY dry here during the winter.
I knew I misspelled it but I think it works for my point.
One way or the other, this ruling ends in a riot.
As long as the riot includes tentacles, I’m all for it.
Well, not with THAT attitude!
A move like cutting Matt Bryant mid season with whatever hopeless record Atlanta has is why the football gods hate the falcons. It’s like benching Eli Manning in some meaningless late season tryout for a guy they should know from practice is going to be cut next year. He is real and he will punish those who offend him. But not cheaters, apparently. He’s vindictive, not just.
Also the dalton thing is dumb. If the guy didn’t win for you at least he was a good soldier who did more in bengals orange than anyone than boomer, no? Bengals fans? I’m just guessing. But he deserves better. Can some no name rookie win with that o line? Shame.
Despite being a filthy traitor coward, Carson Palmer is still the best Bungles qb in history and will be for a thousand years after Mike Brown’s death.
Yes, right. How did I forget him. That was an unfortunate end to his tenure, too.
Ken Anderson remains the best Bengals QB!
Oh fuck those umps. That’s a terrible call.
Yeah, that was absurd.
Of all the things, that is not reviewable.
Of course now they do.
JC Martin is laughing his ass off.
“Looks cut and dry to me, good call.” -Angel H., far away from a baseball field thank goodness
Also thanks to this joke Angel Hernandez is suing me.
Horseshit call.
No, that’s the Kentucky Derby.
Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea: A Tour of the Underwater World by French writer Jules Verne has some good tentacle porn in it.
The TENTACLING has begun!
Evening people.
Give me your tired, your poor, Your grayed out masses yearning to comment free, The wretched refuse of your teeming Deadspin. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door flies open!
To hell with that! We’ll build a firewall, no a pay wall and get Deadspin to pay for it. – Chenito Mussolini
That’s excellent work on the deadspin synopsis, @champagnefellowbobby. I am hoping that some of the better commenters over there find there way into our loving embrace.
I’m assuming we already have people working on that? Also, when do we start porn-bombing the comments?
You know what? I miss being Rick-Rolled. It was a more innocent time.
Moose is going through his tentacle porn folder at this moment.
When KSK went down there was a fisting gif that seemed to stay on for a long time, which to me was hilarious.
Careful, or we’ll awaken the Fek
Shit, need to refine my search a schmidge.
Thanks brother.
Its good thing internet Dad only sold one share of DFO stock to each commentist. Otherwise it would take what, $264 for a leveraged buyout.
Dammit, is that what that piece of paper that just said “Stock” on it was supposed to be? Fuck me, I thought it was junk mail. Now I’m out, what, nearly a dollar?
I sent a couple of vicuprofincet to some hermit in North Carolina, for my share.
Weird my was just a stock photo, the return Puerto Rican address checks out though.
I sold my share for meth years ago. Turns out, it was brown sugar. The Rolling Stones song. On cassette. Fool me once…
Man, for a second there I thought this Motherless Brooklyn movie was going to be about Robert Moses. Google search indicates otherwise. Man, that guy Robert Moses was a GIGANTIC dick.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_Broker
Edit: apparently Baldwin’s character is indeed based upon Moses. But with a different name.
“Fuck Moses.”
-R. Caro
“I agree.”
-Ramses II
So shall it be written, so shall it be done.
Boy, all this talk about KSK and Deadspin sure makes me want a Bud Light Lime or maybe a nice Lime-a-rita.
That’s strange. It makes me want to ask my long-distance girlfriend for anal sex.
To be fair, most things make you think of that.
What about Corgi Friday?
#BringbackMatt
if only there was an #UpFor hashtag…
#upforwhatever.
#Natitude just blew its load all over Verlander’s back.
“Seems fair to me” — K. Upton
“Its all the action he’ll see tonight anyway. Also, mooooooo.”
-Also K. Upton
[is triggered]
– Mango in Chief
https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js
Chiefs coach Andy Reid weighs in after today, too.
I see his doordash order is on its way.
Hangerdoordash.
I think someone should write an erotic alternate history entitled Licking Stalin’s Taint
Gulag Archismellago
Ahhh, the between-course palate cleanser of cunnilingus and salad tossing.
Full title: Licking Stalin’s Taint Whilst Powdering His Balls
Licking Hitler’s Nut by Albert Speer
I think that was the working title for the first draft of his lies, I mean “memoir.”
I will say I do miss all the job opportunities we used to get from KSK on live brogs.
My Aunt’s Cousin’s German Shephard make $1000 dollars a day staying at home!
Just go to http://www.Iamnotnotanigerianprince.com
Or the GEAUUUX HEAUUUX guy.
And who knew Nat would end up running Breitbart?
“Fat-free almond milk, of course.” -Joe F., Denver
Aw, it was by joining a thread busting on Jason Whitlock that I managed to attain my first approved comment at deadspin.
BRING BACK JEFF GEORGE
So JerBear50 wants me to give up horny fourny for some guys I expect could be playing in the XFL soon. At 3-5, all I can really hope for at this point is chaos, so yea or nay?
require ALL his Iggles
I’m open to options.
And how the hell are Chris Godwin and McLaurin headed for the XFL? Godwin is the 3rd highest WR in our league.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comedic_device#Hyperbole,_or_overstatement
lol Just saying man, I’m open to renegotiation. I’m strong on WR but could use a solid RB.
[door flies open]
YOU NEED A WEEK TO MULL THIS OVER!!!
More liek DEADspin amirite?
You better goddamned believe I picked up Ryan Finley in my money league, where I is 2-6, and thus free to set whatever whimsical lineups suit me.
I cut King Laserface. One Shitty Wolf is enough.
What do you honestly think he can do this week?
/all my qb’s are on byes because I’m stupid
Finley is also on bye. You mean Laserface? He’ll need to keep pace with A.A. Ron, and GB’s pass D ain’t nothin’ special. GO FOAR IT
I’m really curious to see what comes of J/O Media vs. GMG. GMG has legit grievance claims, but I want to see if anything actually comes of it. There were a considerable number of shops like that that unionized the last few years. Is this the first major labor dispute to come from one of them?
It seems to be. The others have all just unionized. This is the first WGA-blog to have their editorial integrity challenged by corporate ownership.
If G/O stomps all over them, it could get real bad real fast.
it’s all a FaLSe fLaG to force Drew off their health insurance wake up sheeple!!111
This isn’t a labor dispute. Like it or not, the publisher (the owner) can tell the editors (the employees) what to write, or at least what to write about.
That whole Deadspin/Gawker crowd sure seem to get pretty full of themselves.
That would depend on the terms of the collective bargaining agreement. Have you read the Gawker CBA? I have not, but some employees have claimed it contains provisions governing editorial independence.
I believe Petchesky refused management’s demand to take down the article about the auto-play sound-on ads all over the site, in which they directed readership’s complaints directly to management, which violated GMG’s collective bargaining agreement.
Can’t tell whether or not you mean that “refus[ing] management’s demand to take down the article” was the violation of the CBA, or that the article was. The version I heard was the former: that the CBA specifies who can order an article to be taken down, and the union says that procedure wasn’t followed while management claims otherwise.
Yeah. We’re on the same page, I’m just too stoned to write good.
RIP Deadspin. Why can’t we just have a nice place to put our dicks up, relax, and make fun of said dicks?
We do.
-50mL
Ok, who’s going to be fired first for not sticking to dicks?
not teh Velcro Fleshlight ™
[opens fly, takes dick out]
Have fun.
/Godamnit! It’s not that small!
I’m still grey over there at the G/O Media empire, but I gave a shameless plug for DFO on the good doggos post.
Grey dick……
jokes.
I missed ya Moose.
Likewise, ya bastard.
Harf?
Harf.
You ever date a near-sighted woman?
What’s the o/u on number of innings before the ‘Stros essentially put this one to bed? I’m going with five.
Most nights, the games have been over by the second.
Strasburg can be gotten to in the first. Happens all the time. You’ll be sleeping like a baby before the 10:00 news. Fiddle dee dee. The Lightning scored. That will require a tetanus shot.
“Who needs defense anyway?” -Ice Giants
“Doorfliesopenspin: Sports news without abscesses, flavor or secretions.”
*some secretions may occur naturally in trace amounts.
Trace? I SAVED UP FOR SATURDAY!
“Constantly spinning, spinning, spinning …”
And betting.
Only a few more days before I fly out to get morning shitfaced in an Oakland parking lot!
Oh yeah, some sort of sporting event too.
Please keep the lack of focus on sports.
-Kerry Flynn
4-0 Ice Yinzers with five minutes left in the first. Gratliff and I will be drinking, but for entirely different reasons.
I’m not gonna lie-“Doorfliesopenspin” has a certain ring to it.
[Investment Opportunity Flies Open]
“I’ll take ten thousand shares!” – Hue Jackson
You just want “free” scotch.
Somebody’s begging the “Who Doesn’t?” question.
For some it is not the only motivation.
Beerguy also wants free beer.
Yeah, and everyone with the last name “Black” is African-American. Racist.
*Drinkist.
The Deadspin thing and the KSK thing is why I am glad that we at DFO do not have corporate overlords and do not accept advertising. Although, I really do think we should be getting some free Pornhub swag for all the articles I write. It would make the tipping contest prizes a lot more interesting…
Just sayin’…
I thought WE were the corporate overlords.
Kinda like how the fans own the GB Packers, huh?
https://www.wildsecrets.com/p/222654/pornhub-vibrating-virtual-stroker
T-shirts?
Available in long sleeve.
Come to find out a search for “pornhub t-shirt” brings up a few interesting things.
h
ttps://cl.phncdn.com/gif/186332.gif
That’s not a t-shirt, even.
“Perfect for hiding the track marks!”
That guy had to sell his computer.
BattleBots and hot sauce companies still haven’t given me a damn thing for free!
Let’s start a write-in campaign to get Weaselo onto an episode of Hot Ones. Despite the sound of it, this is in fact not linked to Pornhub.
I live close enough! Let’s do it, Sean Evans!
We’ll have a special episode where he force-feeds you wings while you play your cello. I think we can take up a collection to get a customized Wolfman Rob jersey for you to wear on your appearance.
Now seems like the perfect time to announce DFO’s new partnership with German multimedia publishing conglomerate Oesterkurb Organized Publishing. Their (and our new) slogan is “OOP for Whatever.”
Is this somehow related to my Pornhub searches?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWW6-HTkMwc
All you had to know going into the Flyers-Pens game is that Flyers Twitter was getting hyped for it, meaning only despair could occur
The Bengals are definitely my team, they did absolutely nothing and hopes it all works out.
I figured Mike Brown knew no team would accept his collect calls.
He simply consulted his “scouting department”, aka FS1 programming, and decided he should stand pat.