Hey all, this is your “crap I’ve got to write the open thread for tonight and just remembered even thought I’ve been sitting around all day doing sweet fuck all” Tuesday night open thread. Hope you are all well and that your sugar and gravy levels are returning to normal now that we’ve had a few days to eat through the leftovers. Tho, are desserts really ever considered leftovers? That’s some good marketing there. Day old cake, sure. Day old mashed potatoes, meh. I can’t think of any other foods that get that kind of treatment.
Since I’m off, todays’ big task was to start a jigsaw puzzle with youngest GTD. It’s a 1000 pieces, so not too bad, yet. We started another puzzle today, but the pieces were so thin, that they didn’t want to stay together, so we put that one away and started another. Nice to spend time with the family doing something not TV related.
Since we’re doing origin stories in a haphazard fashion and I have word count to burn, here’s mine: I was a long time reader of the place #notupforwhater, but never commented there. Everyone there (and here too) seems to be always funny and well written, so i just enjoyed the blog and the comments. When this place started, I still just read for awhile, but then was pulled into participating in a few open threads and Quotables (always my favoUrite post). After commenting for a bit and becoming only slightly less uncomfortable in doing that, I had the “bright” idea that I should help out in the #content mines and did a Boots on the ground for the Mann Cup ( Box lacrosse summer championship) and then a trip to the zoo. I still just randomly post, but am trying to be more regular (need to add more fiber to my posts) in posting, so filled in for RBG while he’s on the IR. As i took science and math all through school and avoided writing as much as i could, I’m still not comfortable writing or posting, so force myself to write moar. I do now comment freely, just don’t have much to say. I’m less interesting that Flacco, if that’s possible. I just don’t have unibrow. Although i have to say that while we don’t always get along, y’all after like family to me and that no mean things have ever been said about my comments or posts, unless, like, warranted. And writing here does give me appreciation for what it takes for each post to be created here. I’m not sure how others are able to create so much quality content so often.
NFL NEWS
Cooper Kupp now on the COVID list.
Steelers to rest starters on Sunday. Not like there’s much of a drop off from how they have been playing as of late. Heyyoo
Other Sprots to watch
Cheez-it bowl – 430 ESPN
Alamo Bowl – 800 ESPN
Mens hoops ball:
South Florida at Memphis – 6PM ESPN2
Houston at Tulsa – 8PM ESPN2
There are other games on so check your local listing for full coverages.
Enjoy the last Tuesday night of 2020. Stay safe out there campers and have at it below. Or not. Whatever. Do you.
Watching Perry Mason. Tatiana Maslany is every bit as captivating as she’s ever been.
I thought you meant the original show. Also the most important question: is the theme song still “Park Avenue Beat”?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOpxLa9PPto
No, the HBO version. I just saw my friend Keisuke in it!
LOL
https://twitter.com/cnnbrk/status/1344121160640950274
[gives it some thought]
[pours self another cocktail]
That reminds me. I need to hit up the liquor store tomorrow at lunch.
–
Did he really battle it, though, when his victory party was pretty much mask free?
What has two thumbs, a pack of firecrackers, and was mentioned THREE TIMES in eventual balls’ thoughts?
THIS [massive explosion]
How many thumbs now?
-JPP
3 1/2
Whatever, man, I had at least…hey, are those firewor
I don’t have to work tomorrow, so tonight’s hot chocolate is accompanied by two marshmallows and a healthy dose of Gran Marnier.
It’s delicious.
I never cared for mixing chocolate flavor with orange flavor.
More for me.
I have to work tomorrow, so tonight’s tonic is accompanied by freezer vodka.
Cointreau and rye for me
One more Texas TD and I’m ready to break out the:
I haven’t seen this much Colorado ass-rapin’ since Kobe wore #8!
Just finished my last luxardo cherry.
/shakes fist
Damn you, 2020!
[hugs mostly full jar of cherries]
I’m still angry
I like how you take your anger out on the rest of us.
????
Its just a tan line, nothing to be mad at
Gulp!
Nice of her to display the “sell by” date-stamp so prominently.
find=x
Oh there’s also World Jr hockey on too for those that can’t wait for the NHL to get its act together
Did you watch our fair nation squeak by the dirty Germans by the score of 16-2?
Have nawt watched a second of the games. Keep meaning to but keep forgetting. Will keep trying.
That’s for Gold Beach!
I have found that it’s a good idea to start drinking early as long as I stop drinking well before I go to sleep. That way I don’t feel so bad in the morning. But the contrary position is that if I’m going to drink enough that I don’t feel well in the morning, I might as well just go ahead and start drinking early.
Made myself a Red Hook but have to get up early tomorrow so no getting crunk
I kind of feel obligated because I have worked out three days in a row, including both a hike *and* weighlifting today.
The red hook recipe looks interesting. I don’t have punt e mes but perhaps I could do it with sweet vermouth.
Punt e mes is just a little more bitter so it’ll be close.
WOOHOO! San Lorenzo up 3-1! Plus I found a stream for my Ecuadorean tilt!
T. Boone Pickens has donated over $265 million to the OSU athletic department, surely with the goal that they would someday be in position to triumph in the Cheez-It Bowl on December 29th.
Wives 1-3 probably cost less
91 years old and 0-5. Oof.
I don’t think he counts that as a loss
Ted Turner joked “Why are divorces so expensive? Because they’re worth it.”
Probably cheaper to just hire hookers which at least always going to give you the best bang for the buck, you can have more than one at a time, and they don’t live with you.
“This Cheez-It Bowl game is a cross, I mean, barn burner!”
-A Proud Boy
Actually think this may hold up.
Well THIS
The Redbox Bowl?
The Sybian inventor’s wife sponsors a bowl game?
The Redbox Bowl?
I don’t think that’s what they mean when they say to stack nine in the box.
found a funny:
the duolingo owl would undoubtedly beat the shit out of the tootsie pop owl
Maybe, but the Tootsie pop owl can take the licks and he’s a biter.
Bullshit, have you seen the Tootsie Pop owl crack that lollipop open like it was a lesser bird’s skull?
This Cheez-It Bowl tilt is one of the highest scoring cholesterol games I’ve ever watched.
There is an extraordinarily beautiful full moon rising in the eastern sky right now.
Wait, the Cheez-It Bowl is a real thing? I thought it was just some silly ad campaign like the Bud Bowl. Color me “no longer interested”.
Third one down
https://www.doorfliesopen.com/2018/12/26/2018-bowl-sponsorship-analysis-pre-new-years-games/
If not its a 3 hour commercial
Does BeerGuyRob wear doilies around his neck now?
Cheese It Bowl? It this game presented by Bachelor Chow?
?itemid=5319722
When a problem comes along
you just Cheese It
Cheese It, Cheese It good
Are we not dogs? We are rocking!
Choo-choo-choosing a foxnews link because they gear their content towards absolute morons…
https://www.foxnews.com/sports/adam-gase-could-be-patriots-next-qb-coach-nfl-reporter-says
Why would you pick Gase to be a QB coach when Tannehill has done better since going to TEN and Sam “Touch of FoxNews” Darnold hasn’t developed?
Because Belichick is retiring soon?
I wouldn’t wish Adam Gase on my worst…
Hmm. No, actually, Gase to the Pats would be fine. Carry on.
Anyone got action in Argentina and Ecuador tonight??? Anyone???
Vamos San Lorenzo!
Vamos Quito!
Never bet against the CIA when there’s a South American Dictatorship on the line!
So much for that dream of Blake Bortles to Cooper Kupp.
Apropos of nothing, I give to you the found comedy that is the “Jack Sikma Highlight Reel”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXuJjvwoqQ0&ab_channel=Bong
Sikma? Sikma what?
Sikma Dogonyou.
I disagree that you’re less interesting than Flacco. I enjoy your writing and I think you’re pretty funny. Your appearances in Eventual Balls Thoughts should be proof of that.
Like sex, the more you write, the better you get at it and the easier it becomes. Keep up the good work!
[raises hand] “I volunteer to have sex with GTD so that his writing gets better! Hold up….”
[places self on “inactive” roster] – Game Time Decision
Also like sex, the more you write, the more you don’t care how little it does for others so long as you’re maximizing your enjoyment.
“I’ll show you a run-on sentence”
Me (watching A Teacher on Hulu): Huh, this is not at all what I thought it would be.
Also like sex, the more I write, the more my wrist gets sore.
Thank you.
Bought a super expensive Wusthof knife today [for me] but paired that purchase with some top of the line bath towels. [for wifey] My Double DD chess game is on point!
I’d like to point out that my lady friend’s DD chest game is also on point.
“Mine too!” – Eli Manning, thinking about the new batteries Olivia promised to pick up for his miniature pinball machine
“Double D?”
-BofS&F
We’re all going to let the expensive “kitchen” knife just slide by?
I don’t think the word “kitchen” ever appeared in his comment.
My thought process: Scotchy got a knife. Yeah, that makes sense.
Yeah, fuck that, you think I want to draw his attention to me when he’s jonesing to break in the new girl?
Fuck, I live close* to him.
Sorry scotchy
*5 or so hour drive
I love how a 5 hour drive is “close” to you Canadiens.
Close as in don’t need to cross Borders or states to get to me
Figured you’d use something less expensive for your “hobby”, but what do i know…
I remember seeing a clip of these going doing the train jump in the background of a Sports Night episode. Still can’t believe how fucking mental you’d have to be to attempt this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OdzeNR_GBxs
Remembering Sports Night inspired me to go look up Sabrina Lloyd’s twitter account. She’s quite liberal!
https://twitter.com/mssabrinalloyd?lang=en
I like the extra commitment they show by not even bothering with fucking helmets.
[googles “fucking helmets”]
[is directed towards multiple Eli Manning sex tapes]
Yes, I’m laughing at my own joke, but the idea/image of Eli having to put on a football helmet in anticipation of having sex is killing me.
Temple Cummins is a funny name for some reason.
Halftime college football studio talking guy just unironically said “thoughts and prayers to [injured Miami QB].” One of these days my mute button is gonna break from all the mashing.
We should seriously sell some “Two in the Thoughts, One in the Prayers” merchandise…
All profits to a charity of Dok Zymm’s choosing.
With [DFO], ans a shocker symbol of course.