“Between ‘Farewell’ and ‘Goodbye’ Is ‘Get Lost!'” – Beerguyrob’s Last Regular Open Thread

NFL News:

  • The big news is Aaron Rodgers putting it all out there at his first press conference yesterday.
    • He turned ten minutes into 30 by talking about
      • How if they were going to build a winning team around him, maybe ask him what his preferences would be,
      • Guys who he felt had been mistreated by the organization,
      • Not wanting to be a “lame duck” quarterback,
      • That he “loves his relationships” with his coaches, teammates & fans, and his relationship with the front office, and especially GM Brian Gutekunst, is “professional”,
    • And in the end, it’s got to be a two-way street.
      • “It’s the people that win championships,” Rodgers said. “I just want to be a part of people decisions.”
  • And in a totally unrelated circumstance today, the Packers acquired Randall Cobb from the Texans.
    • GM Brian Gutekunst gave up a sixth-round pick to acquire Cobb, and the Texans agreed to pay $3 million of Cobb’s base salary of $8.25 million.

As I bid farewell to the routine of creating the non-football Open Threads, I fondly remember my first one – February 12, 2016, the classic treatise on the Westminster Dog Show, “Dario Was Robbed!” As it happened, earlier that day Internet Dad put out the signal asking for help because he was “overwhelmed” at work.

So I volunteered. I had written nine posts for the site up to that point, so I had a basic understanding of WordPress & the Classic Editor” function. And remembering that I wasn’t allowed to put swear words in the article’s title (again), I followed the basic format & whipped something up. It seemed well received. It got in the mid-200s for comments, so that provided some validation. There were more than enough Alison Brie gifs to qualify the comments as a “Sexy Friday” episode as well.

 

On the whole, it was a fun thing to set up, and an easy way to work my way into a posting routine. With some help, I gained confidence in typing things up for people to read on a semi-daily basis, and it then led to me creating individual posts & running series. On the Threads side, I gradually took over Wednesdays, then added Tuesdays & Thursdays, and finally Mondays. After a year, I then was setting up most non-football weekdays & weekends until we get to today, which is my 1200th post of some kind on [DFO].

As I learned, people will read what you write and be favourable towards it, so long as you don’t insult their intelligence by not caring about your end result. It also helps you learn to both accept constructive criticism and not take negative reviews to heart. Further – “likes” & page views aren’t everything; some of my best work only got a few comments, but those comments were the best because they provided insight & assistance. Plus, more Moose gifs = the more he enjoyed the article.

That is what I’d like to pass on to people considering whether to contribute.

You will find a supportive community that will help you find your voice. As a bonus, we won’t sell you out like Bill Simmons would or claim your words as our own like Melania Trump. Joliet Jake has done a wonderful job with his “Wrestling Wednesdays”, and “Sexy Friday” is alive & well. But there are other nights you could claim, and once football season begins Scotchy stops killing hobos & starts prepping gameday threads so you don’t end up doing as many as there actually are.

Besides, it’s not like I’m leaving forever. I just have to give up doing the Open Threads because I know I won’t be able to commit to them for the next year. Stupid career.

My overall commitment to the site is still there. I still go through the user requests & clear out the spambots. In fact, I’ve spent the last couple of days emailing most every registered user of the site to see if they are still active. (I used “commented in the last six months?” as my guide.) It allowed me to clear about 50 dead accounts, and a few Russian bots, out of the database. Some of those names brought back some memories, but I’m hoping they’ll eventually return in some fashion. And some of the casual visitors & lurkers have emailed me indicating they are ready to become more active, so that’s been a plus.

I’ve got a possible series coming up, based on some YouTubing & teaching prep I’ve been doing. I’ll contribute my annual preseason perspective on (for some reason) the Atlanta Falcons and their playoff chances. (Here’s a preview – “poor”.) And as always, I’ll be here for the annual “DFO Hate Week” around the Super Bowl.

This fucker’s a permanent topic.

So while I will miss being here 3-5 times per week as your humble purveyor of Open Threads, I’ll still be around. But I do thank you for the kind words over the last few days. It means a lot that people enjoyed what I produced.

Thanks as always, Low Commander.

Tonight’s sports:

  • Olympics:
    • Track & Field starts tonight
      • It’s mostly preliminary heats in track & opening rounds in field.
      • Highlight – the Men’s 10,000m final (11:00am ET Friday)
    • Baseball has the USA vs. Israel.
    • Boxing is into the quarterfinals, as is Women’s soccer.
    • More swimming medals are available.
    • Finally, Equestrian Dressage starts!
  • Futbol:
    • Gold Cup:
      • Qatar vs. USA – 7:30pm | FS1 / UNI
      • Mexico vs. Canada – 10:00pm | FS1 / UNI
  • NBA:
    • Draft – 7:30pm | ABC / ESPN / TSN4 / Sportsnet360
  • MLB:
    • Blue Jays at Red Sox – 7:00pm | Sportsnet1
  • Wrestling for Jake:
    • Impact – 8:00pm | AXS / FiteNetwork Canada

And with that, that’s it from me for awhile. Keep on keepin’ on, you guys. I’ll be back sooner than you think.

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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ballsofsteelandfury

Holy shit what an ending!!

Mr. Ayo

This is worse than a benches clearing brawl.

ballsofsteelandfury

Right?

Mr. Ayo

RIP to our hat.

Good effoUrt.

Doktor Zymm

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Mr. Ayo

Nailed It!

— Sexi Penni

Doktor Zymm

When I was a 7-yo kid watching the Olympics I turned a couple of stools on their side to make hurdles, then I ran around the ground floor in an oval jumping over the fake hurdles barefoot until I messed up my timing, kicked a toe into a ‘hurdle’ and gave up my Olympic dreams

Gumbygirl

My track dreams died when I was 11 or so. I was running from my neighbor’s unbroken, completely psycho horse, and I managed to run neck first into a fully charged electric fence. I vibrated for hours afterward, and I don’t think I full out sprinted ever again.

Doktor Zymm

At work, suddenly everything is about legitimacy. I have a point of reference for this!comment image

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Alright, let’s recap DFOers I’ve met in person, knowing I’ll accidentally omit someone from the bar crawl or some other drunken haze:

LitreCola
Balls
RTD
Yeahright
Sharkbait
makeitsnowondem
Low Commander
Spam
Brick
Horatio
Unsurprised
tWBS

Shit, I’m definitely missing people who have been berry berry good to me.

Brick Meathook

BFC, you were the first DFOer I met, at the Harbor Room in Playa del Rey, and then tWBS showed up 30 minutes later after meeting and falling in love with another totally inappropriate woman, but that was Mark. I really miss that guy. And then I had to leave to catch a flight and left my bowl and some good pot with Seamus.

ballsofsteelandfury

One of these days we should do a group post about tWBS stories. God knows we all have at least one.

Sharkbait

Wish I could have met him. I still have some ghost vodka I made with his peppers

Doktor Zymm

He was a good egg

ballsofsteelandfury

I believe you’ve also met Dunstan as he joined us on that Pub Crawl.

I still have that coconut oil that SOMEONE won during the Fucked Up Bingo at La Cita…

(Does anyone remember what it was called?)

Brick Meathook

Shit Show Bingo

And I rode the subway with Dunstan and we got off at Pershing and he got us lost. I don’t know why he was leading I’m the combat veteran.

That was a great day on so many levels. We need to do it again.

ballsofsteelandfury

That was it!

And yes, we do!

Last edited 2 years ago by ballsofsteelandfury
Brick Meathook

What was the confection that you brought?

Doktor Zymm

I really hope it was Sponch!

ballsofsteelandfury

Damn right it was! When we hit the last bar ( the Redwood aka the Pirate Bar) , we ended up giving some to the waitress…

Doktor Zymm

Yes!

Brick Meathook

After the pub crawl I rode back to the beach in an Uber with yeahright. The driver was a nice young guy who was in a band. I was in the back seat lying down and yeahright was up front telling the young driver stories about all the concerts he had attended. The Uber dropped yeahright off in El Segungo and then took me alone on the ten minute drive to Playa.

That kid’s life had changed on that drive. It was as if he had seen the face of God. I will always love yeahright for that.

ballsofsteelandfury

I brought ¡Sponch! for everyone that joined the Pub Crawl.

litre_cola

This game is spicy.

Mr. Ayo

Muy caliente!

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s good!

Don T

Found a mantra
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Doktor Zymm

I’m down

Brick Meathook

Did you ever wonder what Brick Meathook actually does for a living?

I do visual effects for movies in Hollywood. I have over 50 feature film credits, plus I think 6 Super Bowl commercials, and five television pilots. I don’t touch episodic TV.

Here’s my “showreel” which is my job’s version of a resume. TOOLCO is my production company, and I’m John.

The title card image I took in Long Beach California.

https://vimeo.com/329813697/198e80bc05

Doktor Zymm

Thanks for not actually destroying the Golden Gate Bridge!

Brick Meathook

That was all still frames that I animated. I’m really proud of that because I made something out of nothing. That was for “Pacific Rim.”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Plus your balls are smooth

Brick Meathook

Lacey!

Don T

On many days, the best thing I’ve read on the web is a BGR post. You’ve spoiled us with quality and quantity. Don’t get lost, prof.

Doktor Zymm

Stolen from a FlyerTalk signature: It’s all in the airline code of the three merged stooges: AA = Abusive Alcoholic, DL = Despicable Liar, and UA = UnderAchiever

Doktor Zymm

The 27 year old dude is maybe old for swimming, but there is a 38 year old race walker from Vacaville, CA competing who hasn’t trained for years because of an eating disorder, so pick the right sport and there is still hope for the medium-olds!

Gumbygirl

Even if I somehow miraculously got good at an Olympic sport, I’d still be headed directly to the Senior Olympics. Or the glue factory.

Sharkbait

I feel like my one shot is in curling.

ballsofsteelandfury

Awesome! I love that show!

litre_cola

Uhh, this is supposed to be a neutral site…

Mr. Ayo

las gradas tienen muchas chicas bonitas

Sharkbait

Motherfucking Tom Wilson ruined the New York Rangers.

https://twitter.com/NYRangers/status/1420928162419154966

ballsofsteelandfury

Good luck to the Canadian Footy fans out there!

All I have to say is that, if you beat us, YOU DAMN WELL BETTER BEAT THE MURRICANS!!

Last edited 2 years ago by ballsofsteelandfury
litre_cola

I wish it was both full strength sides. Then it would be a great measuring stick for the Canuck kids.

Brick Meathook

found a funny:

DOCTOR: The tests are back. You have cancer and Alzheimers.

PATIENT: At least I don’t have cancer.

(h/t to rocking dog for stealing his shtick)

Sharkbait

Glad you’re still sticking around the comments BGR!

If you’re lurking, contribute! It’s weird at first but it’s fun to write here. I know it’s made me a better writer.

Doktor Zymm

Vaccine line at one of the Bangkok sites (Bang Sue RRS) – first day where 60+ and 100kg+ are eligiblecomment image

King Hippo

yet we have to give away fucking guns to bribe people

rockingdog

found a funny:

[clown college commencement]
what you’ve accomplished here today…
*hushed murmur*
is no small feet
*clowns go fuckin nuts*

Horatio Cornblower

‘Keep your eye on the Russian 16-year-old up there in Lane 5″

‘Waaaaayyyyyyyy ahead of you”-Matt Gaetz

Viva La Tabula Raza
Last edited 2 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
litre_cola

I cracked one of Balls’ gifts the “Watz” Fuego brought to you by Takis “Cheese, Hot Chili Pepper, & Lime”

Tomorrow is going to hurt but these are muy caliente.

King Hippo

start a fire or a series of fires

Doktor Zymm

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Doktor Zymm

Doesn’t sound great, hope it works out ok

Horatio Cornblower

Rowdy Gaines is 10 years older than me and I am frankly terrified.

scotchnaut

Rowdy Gaines seems like the name Andy Reid would adopt when he joins the “All You Can Eat Buffet” competitive eating circuit.

Gumbygirl

Eh, he’s just pruney from the pool.

scotchnaut

Jeebus! The winner of the women’s 800 meter race gets a gold medal and an extra meal. #theyskinny

litre_cola

Was to small to wear but turned into a nice wall decoration! I’d still recommend even if I can wear it.

Doktor Zymm

I quite like the new 2021 eventing dressage test, way more compact than making them do a Prix St. George or something but packs in a good selection of skills

litre_cola

Hippo no can haz Qatar as Coupe D’Or champs.

King Hippo

Hippo can NEVAR haz wut he wants

Doktor Zymm

That’s because you have better taste than the real world

#Blackberry4Lyfe

King Hippo

makes gang sign, nods at Dok knowingly

Horatio Cornblower

I see 11 people that aren’t getting their passports back any time soon.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Also, if we’re going to get sappy (even after only one beer) BGR is one of the few DFOers that I haven’t met in person that I still feel like I know.

THAT’S good writing and/or hustle.

Doktor Zymm

Canadian Chardonnay courtesy of Litre, and a slice of crab & cheddar quiche makes for a very fine dinner.comment image?format=2500w

litre_cola

Didja like it?

Doktor Zymm

Yes! It was very tasty on its own while the quiche was heating up, and it’s also a good pairing with the crab quiche!

Seriously needed to chill with a good wine after how this week has been, so thank you, it hits the spot

Last edited 2 years ago by Doktor Zymm
litre_cola

At that tasting they gave small bits of food to pair and that was paired with a prawn and dill cream. So crab quiche makes total sense.

Doktor Zymm

Oooh, on the junk food side I bet it would be great with prawn crackers!

rockingdog

omg
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Doktor Zymm

And that’s a kid wearing that, lol

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s hilarious!

Horatio Cornblower

That mall clearly has a Spenser’s Gift Shop in it.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Bring Back Matt!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I keed, i keed. BGR, you can’t say goodbye to us, only see you later. I’ve learned a ton from you, not just about Canadia but about the history of countries and people that matter to Americans, too. Your writing is first-rate, your research unmatched, and your dogs fluffy and adorable.

Mr. Ayo

Nailed It!

— B. Walsh

Brick Meathook
Doktor Zymm

Time to undo all the good work my air conditioner did and turn on my computer and projector to watch the Olympics while heating up a slice of crab quiche in the toaster oven!

litre_cola

Lady rubgbyball let’s goooo!!!

King Hippo

Speaking of Litre Erotic Delights – I just disposed of Pretend Chelski 6-nil in August 2112.

scotchnaut

It’s time for Lady Gaga’s more athletic sister to shine.

scotchnaut

Canuck men’s volleyball team taking the Venezuelans out to the woodshed and apologizing to them because the latter were expecting maple syrup but didn’t know it only runs in the spring.

litre_cola

We are dominating, are these guys pro-Maduro or not? That is the difference between food or not.

Anthony In TX

In not-football news:

My Rockets took Jalen Green with the #2 pick. That’s who I wanted them to take! They didn’t fuck up for the first time in, like, a long time!

scotchnaut

Not really related but was the first thing that came mind-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QHZR9SA5pOg&ab_channel=TheTrevorWarren

King Hippo

That is not a nun’s laugh
That is a whore’s laugh
WEIRD NUN

Gumbygirl

.

Spacely_space_rockets.jpg
Horatio Cornblower

Figures, Beerguyrob leaves and doesn’t show us pictures of Riga and Lambeau.

Dick.

TheRevanchist

I prefer pics of Dua Lipa, but I don’t judge people based on sexual preferences.

Horatio Cornblower

Aww, yeah, pander to me BGR!

King Hippo

Newell’s Old Boys can has soccer point WOO!!!

King Hippo

I did not cover against the late equalizer. I am not a smart opium poppy.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Dunstan

I will pay money to see a remake of that film where the annoying kid gets shot.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Watch the first few minutes of Leone’s “Once Upon a Time in the West.”

litre_cola

No more RyeBuddyGord around?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7txuPQa9VRA

Gumbygirl

Here’s to Rob. Like the Von Trapp’s-not a Nazi!
https://youtu.be/Qy9_lfjQopU

King Hippo

If Qatar wins this Golden Shower Cup:

(i) North America should cease being a continent;
(ii) it will be like 9/11 come early for the Middle East; and
(iii) I will perhaps die* of laughter

*just not one of them drool-y vegetative states PLEAZ GOD

TheRevanchist

So, North America will become incontinent? Way ahead of you, buddy.

King Hippo

Let he who has not had to change pants at work cast the first stone.

Gumbygirl

Come on man, it’s only a little bit, mostly when I sneeze.

Horatio Cornblower

Why are they even in this tournament? Some sort of pre-World Cup bribery shenanigans?

litre_cola

Whoa, whoa, whoa, are you saying FIFA is shifty?

Horatio Cornblower

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KnightDehumidifier

You sent me an email yesterday saying that this place still exists and I must’ve forgotten that this place existed. So here I am, I guess. It’s a nice place. It may have been a few years so let me get you up to speed: I watched every episode of Becker last year because I was in a good place mentally.

There, you’re now up to speed.

TheRevanchist

The most important part of that show was Alex Desert, who was in the band Hepcat. There was probably something else going on in the show, but that is the only part worth remembering.

King Hippo

oh man, have we ever all dived head first into the cray-cray pool. Velkommen!

litre_cola

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scotchnaut

Your in-depth history posts were my favoUrites. You obviously couldn’t craft them that same day and the work you put into them was amazing. [salutes]

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[stands on desk]

“O Beerguy, My Beerguy…”
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