Saturday Early Lesser Footy y Hoopsball

There is only one Prem fixture this morning, Arsenal/Villa (8:30, USA).  The King’s Afrikan Water Pistols are playfully spraying their way into next season’s Shempions League, but as they say in Footy Manager speak “there can be no letup.”  Villa are a pesky lot, so this might be worth a watch.  Boro hosts Chelski in the FA Cuop quarters, too (1:00, ESPN+).

Sunday brings a USA doubleheader of Foxes/Bees (10:00) and Spurs/Hammers (12:30) – both late game combatants are trying to hold on even to Europa contention.  Slip, sliding awaaaayyyyy.

Of course, the real action is the Sunday early FA quarterfinal, Everton away to Palace (8:20, ESPN+).  The Toffees try to build on mid-week’s miracle, with an even bigger miracle – an actual win away from Goodison Park.  I can NEVAR figure out Palace, which gives me that fleeting, foolish sense of hope.

First tranche of NCAAT (hopefully) goodness:

8E U*NC (+5.5) v. 1E Baylor (12:10, CBS)

Godfuckingdamnit, I don’t want to – and will not – watch this monkeyshit.  I don’t love cheering for the Consent Abstinent of BayBay, but I assure you it is the moral imperative in this case.

9S Creighton (+11.5) v. 1S Kansas (2:40, CBS)

Will you just eat all the dicks in creation, CBS schedulers?  If you ever needed confirmation of the “blue blood” bias, it is this stinker being full national.  Unless somebody finds a magic knee for the Jays’ 7-footer, there is nothing to see here.

11S Michigan (+6) v. 3S Tennessee (5:10, CBS)

Set your post-nods alarm for this game, it will likely be worth it.  YES, it seems more like a football matchup, but the Vols in particular seem to have things figured out.  The Wolverines have been consistently inconsistent all season long, but they still have some quality talent.  Besides, what if Juwan Howard and Rick Barnes engage in fisticuffs?  You don’t want to regret missing that fun.

See you this evening for…EVEN MOAR HOOPSBALL.