Fuck a duck, do I ever love October. Perfect weather, though November is in contention. Especially once the bugs all fucking die. But this October starts nervy…
NC State (+6.5) at Clemson (7:30, ABC)
Oh please, God. Just this once. National stage, ESPN Gameday, first EVAR Textile Bowl with both sides in the Top Ten. Can my Wolven Sort FINALLY get over the top? I mean, Vegas gives us a half point better shot than Kenfucky going into Ole Miss [Ed. note – If my Wolven Sort lose like THAT, I will go on a 5-state killing spree.]. That gives Hippo hope, and as all Evertonians say…It’s the hope that kills you.
LSU (-9) at Auburn (7:00, ESPN)
Oh, the crowd will be a hoot for this’un. War Damn Eagle HATE their coach, and the team seems to HATE playing football (if the Paedo State game last week is any indication).
West By God Virginia (+9.5) at Texas (7:30, FS1)
A Steerfuckers South loss here would be very, very amusing. And I think Fuckers du Cousins just might have the upset in ’em.
Arizona State (+25) at Southern Cal (10:30, ESPN)
Weak Tweaker slate, but you can at least flip over here for pervert pleasUres.
/sorry, kind of mailed in the night thread. I knows. Hippo be nervous. But hey, LMAO at Steerfuckers North. BLOODEYES forevs.
With all respect due the Beatles, Beach Boys, and the Kinks, I honestly think “Surrender” by Cheap Trick is the single greatest pop song of the last 50 years. It’s fucking brutal, beautiful and perfect. Hats off to Rick, Robin, Bun E. and that mysterious Swede on bass. They crafted an absolutely perfect slice of Americana, and I don’t think they’ve ever been properly acknowledged for it. ALL HAIL FUCKING CHEAP TRICK!!!
“”Surrender, but don’t give yourself away”. Fucking genius.
Yes I’m listening to this song on loop until the lesser footy starts
I see the new King is being played like a bitch by a dead PM walking.
How does that work? Can’t he just accuse her of some crime and then have her executed?
Mercy Rule!
College football world reacts to insane mercy rule game (msn.com)
Hope hippo didn’t bet that game
Rockies pitches have walked five straight Dudleys.
It’s like there’s a force field around home plate.
Now six of the last seven.
Lux strikes out, but everything he swung at was a ball.
God speed John Prine.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8tTwXv4glY
COVID’s greatest casualty.
Just possibly invented a new cocktail. No measurements, was fucking around, but–
Rye
That maple whiskey Litre mailed me
Spruce bitters
Little bit of Cointreau
Little bit of sweet vermouth
Expression of orange
Maybe I call it the sweet outdoors
“Call it the ‘Great White North’, eh?”
The Designated Driver
— Britt Reid
Ý4ümnwind
Fell asleep and woke up to WVU’s Tony Danielson being stretched off the field with a head and/or neck injury.
This fucking game.
was imaging it was Gary Daneilson
Took my morning walk today and when I got home I weighed in at 215.
I haven’t seen that number since 2002.
I can wear my skinny ass 36 inch waste button fly Levi’s.
I’m fucking fit!
Noice!
Well done.
Evening. Had a fantastic fucking meal out and assisted in the creation of a new cocktail at the bar. I think I’ll make myself a drink to celebrate.
The good news is, with the playoff as it is and expanding, even if Clamson and Georgia lose they’d still end up in the playoff anyway, probably, so these potential upsets dont even matter
Anyone else ready for 6:00 AM football tomorrow?
Better believe my ass is going to bed early.
Woo!
Absolutely not. I plan to get up early enough to watch the two recordings of the MotoGP and F1 races before the proper 10am (noon DFO standard time) footy kickoffs.
I am in. That’s when the Manchester derby happens too.
Bet your ass I’ll be there too.
I’m going to take a Benadryl as soon as Poirot is over.
I could never coach in the SEC because fuck horizontal stripes.
GUYS! GALS! ALL OTHERS!
We are on the precipice of the greatest announcement in professinal sport history.
That’s right, the KRAKEN are about to unveil with no sense of self reflection the most crigne-worthy mascot of all major sports teams.
An Amazon Box?
Hmm, not delivered on time. You might be right.
JFC. Glad I skipped this unveiling in person,.
It’ a … troll?
Sigh. I don’t know man. I can neither define it nor deny it.
Ridding ourselves of Russ seemed like a positive move. And then this befalls us Seattle fans.
The only true answer is don’t. Don’t try, don’t put out new things, just continue sucking.
Eat at Redmond Arbys.
What…the fuck?
A tribute to the Fremont Bridge Troll, which, whatever. Fuck off man.
Release the Kraken!
Sea Troll is the mascot.
Literally trolling the fans. Glad I missed this.
Can’t wait for the opportunity to punch the mascot’s stupid head.
The line in Mizzou v Georgia was 30.5
I was minus 30.5 to score on myself and yet here we are.
Georgia losing, late, against Missouri
LSU kid fumbling late in game during hurricane season. Guess we know who’s filming Brian Kelly’s practices from the scissor lift next week.
Vancouver goes from their goalie almost turning it over in their own end to a goal at the other end in about 20 seconds wow
Guess that sport!
Lesser footy or ice footy? I’ll take “Lesser”
B-b-b-but Mr. Potter, I d-d-d-don’t wanna kick a field goal
Gonna disconnect for the night. See y’all for tomorrow’s #MandatoryFourteen
We should all go to small English villages and bet on hound races
Put Hippo into a ring with an ocelot guarding a huge pile of pills. I would bet on Hippo.
Always bet on the hound who just took a dump.
Pro tip.
Does anyone have experience with the Mighty Vibe music player?
That doesn’t sound like a music player
It’s advertised as a shuffle with Bluetooth it only does Spotify and Amazon music but that’s where I have my Playlist.
Says it has 3 different power levels and 12 different patterns, sounds like music to me!
HUSBAND: Honey, did you order a “mighty vibe” from Amazon?
WIFE: Yeah…it’s, uh, a music player.
My granddaughter plays the vibraphone in the high school band does that count?
So on my way home from working at the resto on Thursday I had CBS Sports radio on with JR or some other talking head. He was talking about Tua and his injuries, and the expert they had on was David Chao?!?!?! What the fuck? Isn’t he being sued for his famoUs heart needle???
I fucking WARNED y’all.
That can’t be the ONLY thing he’s currently being sued for
This is no different than real news.
Sadly
I don’t think he was responsible for the punctured lung needle – it was his replacement. As you know, the NFL is a NEXT MAN UP league, even when it comes to medical malpractice.
Have we impressed Booger??
I’ve picked him several times. Surley, he must be flattered, if not impressed.
My understanding is that you also flicked him off several times.
A compressed Booger would be painful.
Rod & Todd; paging Rod & Todd. Rod & Todd to The Schadenfreude Room please.
https://twitter.com/Ta_Lon/status/1576208711227691009
Delish. Insert Winnie the Pooh eating gif.
Apparently this is the one-year anniversary.
I hate even acknowledging the existence of advertisements, because that means they’re working, but I would respek the Dr. Pepper Corporation a little if they had a commercial about the acrimony over student loan forgiveness in their Pleasantville-esque world.
Well, that’s not good.
https://twitter.com/ProfanityNewz/status/1576346528876498944
“See? Now we’re not so bad now, are we? (slides Indonesia $100)”
-Roger G.
Here ya go!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7oxSwYv0wVo
Seem like very fine people on both sides.
Have you seen the movie “Furioza’, about Polish soccer hooligans? Grim stuff, good movie.
Oh I will now!
What an interesting land.
One of many contrasts, clearly.
Having finished my two pounds of wings, I am now suddenly remembering why I never order two pounds at the bar anymore.
Lay in plenty of reading material for tomorrow.
The NFL apparently paid money to Amazon to play a commercial hyping how concerned they are about player safety during the show “Hidden Villages”.
They probably should have used that money to hire competent neurologists instead.
cheaper to have incompetent ones that are easy to blame and find liable
with stringent non-disclosure agreements, I am certain
Just like me running into the busty blonde from apartment 302 in the laundry, running into the kicker is never just an accident.
“Ha ha, guess we’re on the same schedule, huh?”
“Oh, Gain, huh?”
Needed that defensive holding call. FACK
[sees Horatio run through the clubhouse wearing nothing but a UConn bandana wrapped around his wingwang]
[checks the score of the UConn/Fresno St. game]
“Ah. Well done, Huskies!”
Fresno State is missing both team captains. If UConn didn’t win, they should be sent back down to D3 or high school.
Buddy, UConn has a true freshman at QB, lost their top 2-3 WRs earlier this season, and is on their 3rd or 4th string RB. And their O-line is a mess due to other injuries.
Whatever else is going on in NCAA football this year nobody out-injures UConn.
I am, however, not arguing that UConn should not be relegated. They absolutely should. Connecticut is not and never will be football state. They lost a ton of money the year they went to the Fiesta Bowl ffs.
My understanding is that Fresno St. was favored by 24 points, captains or not.
They were. The most enthusiastic UConn Twitter types thought UConn would cover.
UConn’s defense played out of their minds, offense got their shit together after 45 minutes of bumblefuckery, and Fresno State clearly wasn’t doing well having flown 3,000 miles to play in a windy, wet, cold, (and empty), East Hartford.
Cool, cool. Listen, I don’t want to make you feel like I’m avoiding eye contact, but…would you mind putting some clothes on?
Sorry, I had to use the bandana to wipe the tears of joy from eyes. I now realize I’ve made this awkward.
Fuck a duck? With those corkscrew penises? No thank you.
ASU is an absolute train wreck. They watched this Herm firing barrel at them for like 28 months and, when they had to pull the trigger in season, they’ve got no plan but an ex AZ HS coach who is RB coach and, oh yeah, the AD who has fucked up every other program and is solely responsible for the football team going up in flames AT THE EXACT MOMENT AGGRESSIVE MERITORIOUS REALIGNMENT IS THREATENING THE SAFETY OF THE CONFERENCE AND FORCING EVERY INSTITUTION TO LOOK OUT FOR NUMBER ONE — that guy is Herm’s old agent and will need to go next. And then the school President is some good old boy who ain’t getting out of the way and isn’t up to hiring the new AD and/or Head Coach.
It’s really just JV Arizona Cardinals over there — except the Cards have rapist educated MAGA and ASU enrolls poor dumb violent weak MAGA.
ASU needs penicillin buts its probably too late
Hey – remember it can always get worse. They could be Texas, you know.
Near identical drives to start
Pat MacAfee cut off King Lazerface cuz of his poor connection
That’ll be a huh? what? FUCK YOU
There is one member of royalty who gets lineage.
NC State cheerleaders in black, that is my jam
Evening, folks.
I am proposing a path to bipartisan reconciliation for political stripes across the world:
Government subsidies to bring back cheap chicken wings once again.
I miss 5 cent wing nights. Hell, I miss 25 cent wing nights. I’d be willing to negotiate quite a bit to bring those back again.
Yes, I am awaiting two pounds of wings I’m currently baking in the oven. Yes, they’re done in 10 minutes. Yes, I’m starving.
Right, left, or centre, we all love stuffing our faces with chicken fat!
Just found a new Korean Fried Chicken place nearby, my doctor will not be happy. Not cheap but worth it
I love Asian food. But I can barely knock out some Asian braised chicken thighs (or we will find out in a few). How they can get Korean BBQ level flavor I can only guess.
🐔
“How about we give farmers a bunch of money and no cheap wings?”
– M McConnell (R – Pre-Hell)
ESPN2 has Pat McAfee doing a college football Manningcast for the NC State Clemson game. This should be interesting.
should have a different wrestler every quarter
Fuck yo’ stupid-ass rock
Florida State is still very, very amusingly incompetent.
5-0 Kansas, 4-1 Maryland. What a country!
In response to me not knowing Scott Frost was fired, could someone tell me when the next autogyro to Siam is? I have a letter that I need to get to the Prussian consulate.
The crowd in Lawrence is so quiet, it’s like a (non-Irish) funeral.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLdiVMtW0mE&ab_channel=BleacherReport