Your Tamworth/Tottenham Open Thread + Broncos/Bills, Whatever

You’ve been talking about this match all week so here you go! I see we’ve Arsehole/Man U as well-not a bad footy-related day!

Would anyone care to wallow with me in the tepid bathwater of my Tub of Wrongness regarding the Chargers game? Herbert was the first qb since 1950 to throw more pics in a playoff game than in the entire regular season. Oof!

To The Game!

Broncos/Bills:

-Buffalo is the first team in the Super Bowl era to have less than 15 sacks and 15 turnovers and their +24 differential is the best any team has seen in 15 years. The House Money Broncos led the league with 63 sacks.

-Payton has of course done an incredible job this year but his postseason road mark is 1-5. No matter the outcome, outsiders will regard this year as a roaring success.

-Some want to call this a Von Miller R-word Game but he left 5 years ago-let’s call it a Reintroduction Game.

-Is Denver’s D solid? They are in the top five (there’s that number again) of at least 17 different statistical categories. And Surtain, oh my. No man is an island but db Surtain has not allowed a single player more than 50 receiving in any game. I shall call him, “Isthmus”.

-That said, there is a gap that Allen has the skillset to exploit. (you were thinking ‘running’, weren’t you? Well, there is that as well) Though they are effective when blitzing, Denver has given up 15 of 22 passing TD’s while doing so. Josh has passed for 16 TD’s while being blitzed.

-Nix on the BoLieve?: Rookie QB’s have lost 5 (again!) straight road playoff games and them Broncs have lost 6 of 7 to playoff teams this year.

get at it.

 

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litre_cola

Dead guy pickerception

The Maestro

Just like Hamlin, the pick-six was also neutralized on the field.

Redshirt

Come on 25 garbage rec. yards to Sutton.

Redshirt

…or not.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

#FreeMackHollins

ArmedandHammered

Their hubris shall be their downfall.

ArmedandHammered

They really have high hopes for that NCIS: Origins show, maybe they are hoping the geri’s will fall asleep with the TVs on.

fleshwound_NPG

15 yard penalty on recreating one of the greatest taunts ever https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAZvvaT79g8

Wakezilla

Why is Allen still on the field? That’s tempting fate

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Nothing bad has ever happened to a Bills player on the field, right?

ArmedandHammered

They’re pllayihg the Cult on the stadium speakersl

litre_cola

Disintegration was their best album.

LemonJello

Josh is unleashing the Dragon now. We may all be pregnant at this point.

fleshwound_NPG

good: expanding playoffs (college, nfl) means more teams which means more fanbases have hope and will watch

bad: first round games are now dog shit

Unsurprised

Meta: There are too many D-1A teams and maybe 20 of them are profitable, which is the only metric that actually matters since NIL and conference realignments has killed the pretense of amateur athletics.

Doktor Zymm

This game is over enough that I’m gonna start playing the remaster of The Secret of Monkey Island. I’m off to talk to pirate leaders in the Scumm Bar!

ArmedandHammered

I got my mini atari system with the games already on it, around 200 or so, may try to set it up. I hope to get my wife to try to play games like Pong, Warlord, or Tank, just to see if she may like some gaming,

The Maestro

No mo Bo.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Do we have a name for doink that goes in?

fleshwound_NPG

0-3 in decent games thus far

Doktor Zymm

Oh hey, Curtis Samuel! I thought he was dead based on his fantasy results across the first 6 weeks of the season

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

In

Sur

Mount

Able

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Maybe Nix those comeback hopes

ArmedandHammered

There is beating a dead horse and milking a dead cow, but what CBS has done with the NCIS franchise redefines getting blood from a stone.

clint greasewood

Coming this spring to CBS, USPS:Knoxville

Game Time Decision

[takes off sunglasses, stares off into distance ]
Oh YAAAAA
*Now in Chicago

King Hippo

Lamar! v. Brokeback is the matchup we don’tdeserve, but really need. As a SOCIETY.

Doktor Zymm

I kind of want a small sauna that looks like an old school US phone booth

ArmedandHammered

and i’m the stoned one?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Why when a British one would be so much cooler and classier?

Doktor Zymm

Red doesn’t match my decor

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Then do a Doctor Who one

ArmedandHammered

but if you set it up right, you could make the inside bigger than the phone box entryway would suggest

Redshirt

Seeing Lamar do shit like that yesterday and Allen do shit like this today is why I’m okay with Burrow only getting MVP votes.

Col. Duke LaCross

“What is a catch?” 2025 Playoff edition.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

IN.SUR.MOUNTABLE

King Hippo

Problem is that even when you make Brokeback do what he ain’t wanns….he’s still REALLY damned good

Doktor Zymm

Is your entire torso a body part?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Holy shit, Josh Allen looking more than competent

Doktor Zymm

Neato torpedo!

King Hippo

Holy Jeebus, great defensive call by VJ just have to tip your cap there

jjfozz

NCIS Tijuana!
NCIS Brazil!
NCIS Guadalajuara!

ArmedandHammered

I want one in Thailand!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

“Please, no”

–Retired American Men on “vacation”

Wakezilla

What hall to Tony Romo? His voice sounds awful and his insights aren’t as good as they once were. Did he get complacent? System broke him down?

Cecil Rhodes

Anyone that spends every Sunday with Jim Nantz realizes that you don’t have to be cromulent to hold onto a job in the broadcast booth.

Doktor Zymm

Dammit, he’s out cold

Cecil Rhodes

Just a back injury. No big deal.

LemonJello

Oh, Davis just got Tua’d on that play.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

“What does that mean?”
–Tua T.

Last edited 3 hours ago by BrettFavresColonoscopy
ArmedandHammered

Finally free. The wife has been dropped off at the airport, Spanky has been filled with ice and water, the bowls are packed and laid out in my mise en scene. I may be so stoned soon, that I may vibe out for awhile.

BeefReeferLives

bowls packed? check

pants off? check.

all you need now is a block of cheese the size of a car battery

ArmedandHammered

we have one the size of a large brick, but I used a lot of it to make Welsh Rarebit. So fucking good.

ArmedandHammered

and pants off is a given

Cecil Rhodes

Oh, spare me the Jim Nantz accolades. Broadcasts will be undeniably better when he drives his Augusta Green Lincoln off into a gated community in the sunset.

Unsurprised

But Al is 80.

Doktor Zymm

He still ate ketchup until he was 10

BeefReeferLives

I gotta admit, though, Romo is doing an impressive job of blathering on and on and ON while gargling Nantz’s balls.

jjfozz

Who’s watching Matlock? Zombies who watched when they were alive?

LemonJello

Only if they can’t find the remote.

jjfozz

Romo craves the smooth, velvety feeling of Josh Allen’s sac on his chin

Doktor Zymm

Based on the facial hair I doubt Josh shaves his nuts

jjfozz

That just adds to Romo’s fantasy of shaving them with a vintage straight razor

Doktor Zymm

comment image

Cecil Rhodes

Time for Wil Lutz to go back to work at his family’s deli in New York City. His rabbi was right — field goal kicking won’t get you anywhere!

jjfozz

Why can’t you be a doctor like Avi Schlenstein’s son?

Mr. Ayo

Lamime Yamal is too damn good for his age.

Spur

comment image

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I haven’t heard a doink that loud since my high school girlfriend decided to stop trying to be quiet

Horatio Cornblower

Must have been hard to hear over the roar of Niagara Falls.

The Maestro

“Nailed it!”

– B. Walsh

Col. Duke LaCross

HAIL SHANK’LOR!

BeefReeferLives

& his bastard child, DOINK!

Gumbygirl

Will Yutz, amirite?

Mr. Ayo

What a Putz!

Mr. Ayo

DONK DOINK!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

ALL HAIL DOINK

Doktor Zymm

Doink is back!

Horatio Cornblower

DOINK!

Drink!

Senor Weaselo

We got a doink!