TGIF! DIE IN A FIRE SPRINGER YOU CHEATING DISGRACE! Also, is anyone else excited for the start of the NBA Cup tonite? Certainly nothing else of import is on this evening.
Word Count Filler Time
Let’s talk about doctors. Wait, let’s talk about patients.
First: Puppies!
Interested in botox injections and wrinkle-reductions? Too bad for you, but great news for your dog in Rio. Dr. Brito will happily, and for a modest fee, apply the latest in surgical procedures for your dear little doggo. He’s even innovating in the ear straightening and eyebrow correction areas. His philosophy is that people like talking to good looking people, so the same applies to your dear pooch.
Second: Tummies!
Reminder that you can pass medical school with the lowest grade in your class. A couple of these advised this particular lady that she needed hernia surgery but it wasn’t urgent so they wouldn’t schedule it and instead put her on the list with other elective surgeries. Seven months later this not medically educated lady decided that her doctors were wrong and plotted a way to get the medical attention she needed. So she broke up a couple of biscuits, mixed it with cranberry juice, threw it in the microwave for a bit, then tossed that about her residence and called paramedics because she was vomiting blood. Some competent doctors operated on her and found her stomach was pressing on her heart enough that she was close to death.
Lastly: Hairies!
This guy had 96% of his body covered in hair. Is that a lot? Yes, he was listed in the Guinness Book of World Records and also got him a role in a movie at the tender age of 6. The downside? Part of that 96% was in his ear and it caused him to lose hearing and induce chronic headaches. Competent doctors performed a hairectomy on his inner ear that lasted four (4) hours. The procedure was a success and he lived happily ever after. And if you’re wondering about that 4%, part of that is actually his face because he refuses to grow a beard or mustache. I’m assuming the last 1% is his immaculately groomed butthole.
So doctors, like life, are a world of contrasts.
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Sexy Time
Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to the comments!
Enough baseball, let’s Samhain this shit up!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpDmF2zu0_I
https://youtu.be/Ezuk-v9q_80?si=fo7nhfUy9E-AOYBi
https://youtu.be/WLSa8hwMWug?si=Umr-hi85kxEUYlZD
And even though it’s the Only Misfits, I still love this song
https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cy8G_X6ur0E/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
If you want some actual Samhain
not only does dave roberts have another game to fuck up the bullpen, but as an added bonus he might fuck up ohtani and/or the DH
Dodgers mull Ohtani roles for potential World Series Game 7 – ESPN
The oven is preheating for possible bananacakes.
this combined with the la bullpen, if toronto does not win they fucking do not deserve it
Cry about that call Springer, you fucking (expletive deleted).
Wool! Hasta mañana Toronto
lol Blue Jays. Eat shit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ii5Xwfk5lgo
it’s lost in the ivy!
Dave Roberts is an absolute moron.
The fuck is Sasaki still in the game for? He barely got out of the 8th.
“I think we’re going to see the slow curve ball here” says highly paid analyst John Smoltz, followed by Chris Bassitt throwing two straight fastballs to get out of the inning.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BcIygrksGRg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JV19-NP2frQ
Just so much Halloweenie specials for later. May need the distractions from the Yinzers getting themselves caught in trees and from the insides of the pickup truck they just wrapped around a utility pole.
I hate when those utility poles leap out into the middle of the road right in front of me.
Vlad Guerrero Jr. pimping a walk that he only got because the home plate umpire is drunk is one of several reasons I can’t stand Vlad Guerrero Jr.
now if he starts batting bare handed like his old man, i can get behind him
His father was one of my favorite players. Guy would hack at, and usually hit, anything.
When asked why he supposedly said “nobody walked their way off the Dominican Republic”
This ump better be drunk or high to justify this incompetence.
Looks like the people in the expensive seats aren’t bound by the 7th-inning cut-off for beer.
Eat the rich.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbntXv2ngO0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVE5gkRKYIk
I have absolutely zero faith in LA’s bullpen
They’ll be just fine. Until tomorrow.
they gettin outta this with sasaki
absolutely NOT in game 7
Sasaki: “Oh are they?”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6_w_BxvfFs
Halloweenie 2025 complete, Duke WCS/SpiderDuke had a very successful haul. His mother made the wise decision to not don a costume in order to keep dad from getting too excited, otherwise he’d never leave for work.
I haven’t heard from Lil’ and Lil’er WCS about their trips. Full debriefing in the morning.
I was almost late for my shift, because I drifted to sleep in my vehicle in the parking lot.
How’s everyone doing this Friday, my fellow Halloweenies?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1on_iQlZTa8&t=5s
Fourth year of passing them out and kid’s are apparently now making a specific point of coming here to get a potato
RIP to your windows
They want the potatoes! One kid even said “this will replace my old potato”. And I’m not a monster, got a big bowl of candy with a single potato in it, totally their choice. Popular enough that I’ve gone through all the potatoes, all the onions, and now am down to garlic cloves. They’re still going for it
Shit, I knew times were tough, but fuck…
https://bsky.app/profile/marmel.bsky.social/post/3m4jt4uhwbc2s
Needs more Erika Kirk
the Marry is going to have to be updated soon
I was thinking of dressing up as Feathers McGraw, but the roads got flooded to the point I made a U-turn in front of a bus yesterday (but still made it to my gig in time!) so I didn’t want to wear my suit.
And also I have no social life anymore. I’m even at Apartment Weaselo tonight because I had an 8-9 viola student and would have never found parking at Senorita’s around 10, where I’d have to leave to come back to the Island at 9 anyway.
45% of Caplyta users experienced less depression before they committed suicide.
Welp, at least this Drebbinesque strike zone applies to both teams.
Guy is really having a bad night back there.
Damn near exactly 2 oz. of tequila left in the bottle.
The rest of the night is Sharkbait’s fault.
“How long can you ride him?”
Settle down. I’m drunk. It’s live now.
This margarita gets better as it goes along. I may have to make another.
Someone get you tequila? Or did you realize that you could, in fact, drive just fine?
Nope. I either have just enough or this one is going to be a little light on the tequila.
So I’ll admit that stealing stuff from NFL memes is low hanging fruit, but still…
You say “low hanging fruit” yet I don’t see a Dungy anywhere smgdh
Horrific. Bravo.
Charlie Kirk looking up and smiling right now…
BANNER!
yea, get rid of my jest/bungles for this majesty
At least one of the skeletons in the second picture should be on its knees
Mrs. Horatio was in long enough to see Yamamoto throw a nasty breaking pitch.
Mrs. H: “Wow, that’s a sneaky pitch”
Me: (to myself). “don’t say what Bill Parcells would say, don’t say what Bill Parcells would say, don’t….”
Dodgers right now (artist’s conception):
As to Second: Tummies
That is clearly a Canadian story, if it is in fact true.
Now remember, I’m the All-American Boy but I’m also a Canadian citizen with tons of Canadian relatives and I love Canada. But their universal health care comes with a lot of baggage. If you need surgery (like my well-to-do cousin with means did) you have to wait, sometimes months. On the other hand, in the U.S. I’ve never had to wait two minutes for any kind of health care, although once again I am fortunate to have the means and insurance.
The great Canadian writer Farley Mowat wrote a non-fiction book called Grey Seas Under (1958) about a Canadian salvage tug and its work in the North Atlantic. One great passage in the book is where the captain describes to the writer the perils of injury in a very dangerous job. He says it’s bad enough to sustain a serious injury at sea, but God help you if you are put ashore and go to a Newfoundland hospital, because then you’re really in trouble.
(Note: my mother is from Newfoundland)
Laird Jaysus.
Laird Tunder n’ Jaysus
You’re not supposed to read the word filler section.
Also, she was in England.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/3196492.stm
England, Canada, Same thing
*huge intake of breath*
-Quebec
If you need surgery you have to wait, sometimes months.
/or two days-as was my experience
gausman on pace for like over a dozen strikeouts and about 9 earned runs
if rex grossman was a pitcher
THIS INNING I CALL IT AN UNACCPETED APOLOGY, BECAUSE THOUSANDS OF CANADIENS ARE DISAPPOINTED!!
C’MON MOOKIE!
No, not the porn way assholes.
Yes! Eat shit Springer!
I’m supposed to root for him because he went to UConn, but he also played, and cheated, for the 2017 Asterisks, so fuck that guy.
Thank you for your service.
[chanting]
JER-RY! JER-RY! JER-RY!
MotherF***er.
LA should just bean him in the fucking head every time he’s at bat.
DFO is 100% sending DJ Taj to the playoffs if the Misters Pickle land the 12 seed. Boots shall be On Teh GROUND!
I’m assuming we’re talking about the Aints here, but only because I know Taj is our resident, (only?), Nawlins fan.
I was referring to his almond matter – Memphis
I am liking their blue stripey helmets
That’s two balls called as strike three. Who’s tonight’s umpire, Frank Drebbin?
Hey, a non-strikeout out!
Evening fellow cretins, here is this years offering
That does it. You’re in charge of Sexy Friday now.
Fuck
I do not remember that episode of The Munsters…
It’s the episode where Eddie learns that Lily is actually his step mom.
This is wonderful!
Found a funny:
Damn girl, this is the ass that was spoken of by the ancient ones
Hell yeah the Greeks knew what was up.
Them and they’re UNSPEAKABLE VICE smgdh
Say this for the Greek army, they never left a man behind.
The Dodgers’ offensive performance so far (artist’s conception):
My Redlegs may not have made it to the World Series in person but they’re there in spirit!
Look at the back of that “dress”!
Better pic
https://s.yimg.com/ny/api/res/1.2/Y7NG9ttD4eT2.UVNrs8.eg–/YXBwaWQ9aGlnaGxhbmRlcjt3PTk2MDtoPTE0OTM7Y2Y9d2VicA–/https://media.zenfs.com/en/usa_today_entertainment_893/690f8ead9fc22b7c03d46887ef63232d
I need my refractory time after seeing the front.
That’s not a dress. That a sheer table cloth held in place by cast iron hooks
Goooo BlueJays!!!! ⚾️
Hope this game is ROCKING!!!!
“Nobody in this line-up is willing to move up a few inches in the box”
“Tell me about it, John Smoltz; tell me about it.”
-D. Favre, Mississippi.
.
Eli’s the best.
Tried Sharkbait’s Apple Cider Margarita recipe this evening.
I am neither disappointed nor totally sober.
I just slammed a Strawberry Naked Juice and vodkas before we got trick or treating.
27 years in this house and not one trick-or-treater.
As God and Sonny Jesus intended.
15 years
and 15 years and counting
I put a tranche of candy on a kitchen stool in front of my door, with a “Take 3” sign above.
You should do a Trunk or Treat and get Lady Cornblower to hide in there dressed up as a dead hooker and scare the bejesus out of the children.
There is a condo complex a few miles away that gets kids from all over…
Lowratio would be way better at this assignment I bet.
Truth be told I could do without that particular hooker costume.
Oh come on, it’s not like there’s no template available.
That’s Rocking!
I’m a little surprised that we did not get Halloween Costume Sexy Friday.
Please note: THIS IS NOT A COMPLAINT!
I refuse to theme the sexy. All sexy is good sexy.
Except AI slop. Still not sure how to filter that BS out.
Such a shame that George Springer’s cheating muscle doesn’t seem to have recovered by tonight’s game.
ALAS. SUCH A SHAME.
OH MY, #6 FTW
North Carolina:
Hey now. SillyCuse ain’t far up enough quite yet FOAR THAT.
6 is also the most obviously AI one.
Assuming I can’t still count correctly.
h
ttps://i.postimg.cc/Y9WCg4q9/23e621bfcf96de2a0e41360c67f913100c871319.jpg
If Vance was sitting on a couch, he’d win the Internet. Still unexpected good effort by VPOTUS showing an awareness and self deprecation that his boss couldn’t even attempt to fake.
Now about those Epstein Files…
He admitted he’s banging Charlie Kirk’s widow?
Hey, shooters shoot.
I just want to recommend googling images of Sydney Sweeney from the Variety Power of Women event on the 29th. Sweet merciful Christ. She was on fire.
h
ttps://i.postimg.cc/vZWbzCNK/1029-Variety-Power-Of-Women-15.jpg
Yes, it was a bit nipply that night.
Do you think she’s a “good” Republican?
Blonde hair? Check.
Tremendous Tits? Check.
Yeah.
If she’s not, I’m willing do whatever I can do to get a little “good” Republican in her.
Oh, that’s totally safe for DFO!
Nice jeans!
of course purina is sponsoring the event because look at those puppies
I guess I can kinda see her playing Christy ‘The Coal Miner’s Daughter’ Martin in that upcoming movie.
They are both white and female.
sweet fucking hell