Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: Pre-Thanksgiving Pre-Pre-Festivus Airing of Grievances

I am writing this sentence at 11:34 AM DFO Standard time (or 12:34 local), midway through the basic strings class I teach on Mondays and Wednesdays. Because even though I gave two of the three students who were present Monday an extension on their performance of Lightly Row until today, nobody showed up to class. Not a one.

There are four students in the class. I have yet to have a class session with all four students in attendance (even though they have all come to class so it’s not like someone dipped after the first week). The semester ends in 3 weeks.

I’m unfortunately gonna end up going into my third-favorite Carlos Alazraqui character and go full Denzel Crocker mode. F’s for everyone, except I don’t enjoy doling them out because I’m not insane. Nor do I have a mad wish to find and capture fairies—that Spyro game didn’t have voice acting and he had been long cast out of the role for Tom Kenny. (Aaaand, full circle. Also, fuck Space Age Speedway.)

While we’re complaining some more about my work week, I managed to miss an entire parade by being like 5 minutes to work and going under the subway station and getting spat out at the Oculus instead of Broadway. Which, I mean, its Gotham FC, so it’s not the most massive event, but what’s the fun of working downtown when you miss the parades?

Anyway, that’s this week’s life complaints, so now I can feel thankful tomorrow! But that doesn’t make as good #content, so we’ll save it for the game threads tomorrow once I look at my fantasy team, hanging on to the Chili Vodka safe zone by a thread.

Okay, time for some news!

-After Brandin Cooks got picked up by the Bills, they released Elijah Moore.

-Justin Tucker was NOT signed by the Saints. Instead they signed Cade York to the practice squad.

-Chefs OUT for tomorrow: RG Trey Smith, TE Noah Gray, CB Chris Roland-Wallace. IN: RB Isaiah Pacheco

As for tonight’s appetizer, we got cups o’ varsity basketball, JV basketball, and hockey. Who it is matters little, as it is but a prelude to our adventures tomorrow.

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Senor Weaselo
Senor Weaselo plays the violin. He tucks it right under his chin. When he isn't doing that, he enjoys watching his teams (Yankees, Jets, Knicks, and Rangers), trying to ingest enough capsaicin to make himself breathe fire (it hasn't happened yet), and scheming to acquire the Bryant Park zamboni.
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Doktor Zymm

JJ McCarthy to the Cowboys? I hope Jerry Jones lives forever!

WCS

Old Man Moment:

Rivalry Week ain’t like it used to be. Part of Thanksgiving was being thankful I didn’t go to Pitt. Alas.

Will be cool to see Texas forced to play A&M again. Like watching two rich, spoiled shitheads exes forced to deal with each other all day. They loathe one another, everyone knows it, it’s awkward at times, but when it inevitably boils over, everyone can’t help but watch. It’s the pretty metaphor for Thanksgiving!

jjfozz

That’s a wrap. until tomorrow. i expect the fighting will be hand to hand.

godspeed, imaginary internet friends

pray for me . . .

yeah right

Nella bocca del lupo.

Oh the stories we’ll get from this.

Mr. Ayo

I’m praying for your enemies

jjfozz

Dawn. Thanksfucking Giving Day.

Early reports from the perimeter suggest the enemy is massing, their leader is cranky and is thirsty for blood.

My men are hungover, they’re grabbing sleep. Fuckers.

The smoker is being prepped. I’m on my second Irish coffee (seems those fuckers are good for something besides blowing up British soldiers.)

Hark, the bugle sounds. I am wrapped in the cloak of bourbon and the crown of anger.

TO BATTLE!

Doktor Zymm

My flight is less delayed! Boarding soon!

SonOfSpam

Enjoy Milano or Thin Mints or wherever!

(for real though: Italy is known for their “pasta” and you should try some)

Gumbygirl

Ciao!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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WCS

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yeah right

Are you going to Lake Como?

Doktor Zymm

Venice

yeah right

Have fun!

BC Dick

I have tomorrow off to day drink and watch football and then Friday off to recover and go to the pub. And no family dinners or cooking or anything else shitty that you’ve all described.

Thanks, USA, for this joyous time. It was dumb to make your thanksgiving a Thursday but it’s a damn good excuse to abuse my liver.

Doktor Zymm

I mean, having it on Thursday means most people get Friday off too. I think that’s a lot smarter than those Monday holidays where you only get a 3 day weekend

yeah right

My one annual burden is my job works the day after Thanksgiving.

I’ve been working it for decades so the folks with immediate family can enjoy the long weekend.

However! I only have to do it 2 more times after this one.

Fuck it. It’s Friday light.
Let’s drink things!

SonOfSpam

I gotta work Friday too, but not well. They’re getting a C+ effort if they’re lucky.

yeah right

I’m fucked. It’s the end of the month so there’s payroll, accounting, billing, purchasing reconciliation and all of the fun things that go with essentially running my own site.

So C++ effort.

Old programming joke.

Doktor Zymm

My first job had work on the Friday. I was the only person who didn’t take it off and my manager basically just told me to go home about half an hour after I showed up, I assume because she wanted to leave too lol

yeah right

I used to give the folks half a day with pay but the new time tracking system is fucking savage.

So we talk about food and previous gatherings. It’s a fun crew.

I was shocked that about 1/3 of my employees have never had green bean casserole.

And another sign of food transition is mac and cheese done kicked dressing/ stuffing to the GODdamn curb.

Mashed potatoes still have a dominant roll.

Shit! I could have made rolls!

Last edited 3 months ago by yeah right
Doktor Zymm

We never had green bean casserole at Thanksgiving, but there was a broccoli thing with breadcrumbs on top that was great!

yeah right

You’ll have to give Taj the recipe.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m going to have a mai tai, just like I did last night!

yeah right

Finally!

blaxabbath

You are the silent killer. Go back to tbe Annex.

jjfozz

Considering if I should bring up the shooting of the two National Guardsmen tomorrow at dinner and mentioning gun control.

Now that would spice shit up

Horatio Cornblower

“Frankly I think they had it coming to them….”

4,3,2,1….

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Listen, these guys said or did or were following the orders of someone who said some very controversial things, and you know, these things happen…”

Doktor Zymm

I bet you can get them to agree that black and brown people shouldn’t be allowed to have guns!

jjfozz

I will mention that I got a vaccine for shingles, any mention of that word sends them into a downward spiral. I’ll also mention how much I trust science.

Doktor Zymm

Maybe mention how science says it’s dangerous to eat undercooked poultry, but I’m sure they don’t believe that malarky, then serve a raw turkey

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No, bear meat. If it’s good enough for RFK Jr, it should be good enough for them!

yeah right

I saw your reaction post to the 2nd shingles shot and nodded in compliance.

That fucking SUCKED.

Horatio Cornblower

The next day felt like I tried to cure a hangover by throwing myself down a flight of stairs.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Tell them you’re worried that your shingles vaccine might be shedding, and advise them to mask up.

NotShogunButShogun

My grievance is against cancer. We meet again. Why do you insist attacking those I love and allow me to roam free despite the abuses I’ve self-inflicted? Kindly fuck all the way off.

Doktor Zymm

Plus one to the fucking off bit, not the cancer attacking people you love bit. Best wishes and hugs

Last edited 3 months ago by Doktor Zymm
SonOfSpam

Best of wishes to you and yours. Cancer should be treated with a single shot. AND WE WERE KINDA GETTIN THERE.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Welp, I just finished reading Blood Meridian. I think I am going to just look at pictures of kittens for the next month.

Horatio Cornblower

Fuck that book.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah. It’s very good, but also very, very terrible.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Draft idea: Evil.

yeah right

Like you said, once was enough but holy shit.

Doktor Zymm

I refuse to read any Cormac McCarthy. There’s plenty of great books out there that aren’t the mental health equivalent of stabbing myself in the eye with a rusty spork

Gumbygirl

Real life is scary and hard enough, my preferred fiction is light and silly.

Doktor Zymm

Damn skippy! I’m nawt a teenager anymore, escapism>>pretending I’m some sort of gritty badass

SonOfSpam

I’ve only read “The Road” from him, and that was gun-to-the-temple enough.

But! People are terrible and he wrote about it.

yeah right

I’ve read every book he’s done and am still alive and reasonably happy.

Try Suttree. It’s fantastic.

SonOfSpam

Ok, it’s on the list. Thanks!

yeah right

I did read that one twice.

Enjoy.

Doktor Zymm

I wonder how many people would reply if I placed an ad offering to let people serf for free on my property?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

If it’s for free, are they actually serfs?

Doktor Zymm

What, you PAY your serfs?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No, they pay YOU.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

With labor, I mean. Or crops, or whatever. Firewood?

Doktor Zymm

In labor, as is traditional. Basically they would be volunteering to work for no wages instead of balancing on a slab of wood in waves for no fee. Obviously I couldn’t employ them in any labor that involved being literate.

Doktor Zymm

Although might work best as a radio ad…

Doktor Zymm

What3words locations are fun. Taken plenty of shits at void reply scared

WCS

We use that at 9-1-1.

Well, ostensibly, we use that at 9-1-1.

yeah right

Porto metal bar.

Mr. Ayo

A great Thanksgiving tradition.

RELEASE THE CHIEFS!!! (Spokane)

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Horatio Cornblower

I have a Spokane Canaries jersey.

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jjfozz

Avoided a huge argument about having to “vacuum all the return grates in the house because they’re dusty” by punching myself in the throat, rendering me unable to speak.

Eat shit, Thanksgiving.

Doktor Zymm

Paging Dr Mrs Deadly!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

You have no idea. I was quietly finishing Blood Meridian in our bedroom and when I had like 10 pages left she came in and started vacuuming. Could have done at any other time of the day, before or after, but NO. It’s like she follows me around with that thing.

jjfozz

God that was a chilling book, fucking McCarthy was a genius

SonOfSpam

(vacuum cleaner outline appears above the Deadly house)

Doktor Zymm

Meta AI is generally crap, but this suggestion was spot on

Doktor Zymm

It’s doing that thing where it doesn’t attach the photo! Boo!

Doktor Zymm

Let’s try a RFKjr one instead

4379
BrettFavresColonoscopy

You have to felchoose your own adventure

Gumbygirl

.

Gumbygirl

Fuck.

Gumbygirl

Too lazy to fix it. Meme said ” If I’m going to get healthcare advice from a former heroin addict, I choose Keith Richards.”

King Hippo

I wish Cade York was more likely toplay a meaningful role this season, as I look forward to calling him ok placementkicker

SonOfSpam

the basic strings class I teach on Mondays”

I admire the hustle, but it’s weird that you’re teaching Tampon Removal 101.

King Hippo

hey, cooch sepsis is NO LAUGHING MATTER, Mister Man!!

SonOfSpam

I saw Cooch Sepsis open for Mumford And Sons, and the zither player was excellent.

litre_cola

Yeah that guy was from Switzerland, homeland of the zither.

/we had a zither player in the lobby of Chateau Lake Louise in the late 90’s

SonOfSpam

That’s wonderfully random! If I walk thru the Chateau Lake Louise (someday) and don’t hear a zither, I shall be most put out.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I thought that any establishment in which you were recognized had a policy of putting you out immediately.

Gumbygirl

I could tell you an incredibly gross story, but I won’t. You’re welcome.

Last edited 3 months ago by Gumbygirl
Doktor Zymm

I’ve never personally had anything stuck up there, but I did have a medical professional tell me that most ladies discover they have an old, rotting, tampon in them when their partner tells them ‘girl, you STANKY’ like something died stanky.

Gumbygirl

When you said you missed a parade in NYC the other day, I had a brief shining moment of hope that the Cheeto snuffed it. Alas AND alack.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The Dr. Mrs. and I agreed that the first thing we would do would be to immediately go and buy some fancy champagne, mainly to beat the crowds.

Doktor Zymm

Just keep some in the fridge, don’t want to be caught offguard

Doktor Zymm

My freshman year in college I was taking an advanced calc class at 8:00 am. This being NYU, there were only 4 people enrolled and 2 of them regularly didn’t show. I attended religiously, even when I was really tired or hung over because I didn’t want the prof to be the only one to show up. There were a couple occasions where I was the only one and he asked me if his teaching was okay, it was fine, college kids are just assholes who suck at waking up early.
One of the kids who regularly didn’t show was my buddy, and I made him bribe me with a shitton of snacks in exchange for a copy of the take-home exam he couldn’t be bothered to pick up

BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

Where they good snacks?
But math at 0800 sucks. Think I had 0830 classes everyday for my uni career so admire the dedication

Horatio Cornblower

I did that in law school for a class in Russian Law. The class before Thanksgiving I was the only one to show up.

Pretty sure the A I wound up with was a result of showing up that Tuesday.

litre_cola

8 am Russian History here during Spring session across town. I was a very dumb person as I was hungover almost every class. Great course though so it kept my interest.

Horatio Cornblower

Russian History: “It was very, very cold and then a lot of people died. The end”

BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

*fell out of window

Gumbygirl

“The others lived unhappily ever after.”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

My 8 a.m. freshman year class was computer science. It was in a large lecture hall with pretty comfy seats, and the professor would turn out the lights so we could read the terminal/code. It was very common for 50% of the class to be asleep by the end.

Later on that same professor – a lawyer now – tried to bone my friend Babette (who wasn’t classmate of mine; they just happened to know each other). I can’t blame him though, she was rather fetching.