Sexy Friday – 20260109

TGIF! Be careful when backing up your car out there.

Word Count Filler Time

More cheating men. Let’s see the damage they caused.

Charles Lindbergh
Famous for a nonstop solo flight over the Atlantic Ocean (suck it Amelia!) he also had a sizable family of 6 children with this wife. But all that flying also meant he had time to spend in other countries. In Munich, for example, there was a hat maker (how quaint) named Brigitte. Two years after she died, her three by then adult children came forward claiming Lucky Lindy was their father too.

The three children spent most of their life trying to piece together who their father really was. As children a mysterious American would visit them a couple of times a year and he was known to them as Caraeu Kent. Brigitte confirmed that Mr. Kent was their father but warned the children that if anyone outside their immediate family heard, he would disappear forever. It wasn’t until the 1990s that one of the children was cleaning out a storeroom and discovered a bag with 100 love letters that were signed with the single letter “C.” Also in the bag was a magazine article about Charles Lindbergh. Well that adult child put two and two together and confronted Brigitte who finally admitted that Charles Lindbergh as their father, but they couldn’t say anything about it until after she passed, which they respected.

After going public, the three children were DNA tested and it was confirmed that Lindbergh was their father. Later rumoUrs surfaced by a German magazine that Lucky Lindy also spent his spare time in Munich having an affair with Brigitte’s sister, Marietta. Marietta’s two children have refused to take a DNA test to confirm, but come on.

Charles Kuralt
A CBS newsman from 1960 to 1964 he died of lupus (Suck it Dr. House) in 1997 quite unexpectedly. That meant he was unable to get his finances in order before passing. And so it came out he had a 30 year affair with a woman named Patricia and supported her financially with $80k a year. Good work if you can get it.

Kuralt had a 110-acre fishing retreat in Montana, and Patricia lived in a cabin the two of them had built there. Charles, nice guy that he was, promised the cabin to Patricia on his passing, going so far as provide her a notarized letter stating as such. Charles was actually in the process of transferring the cabin to her, but died before the transaction was completed. As such, the cabin was inherited by Charles’ wife and daughters.

Then the fun starts. Patricia showed up at Kuralt’s funeral and presented the notarized letter to Kuralt’s wife and asked her to honoUr it. Well turns out she didn’t know about this whole affair, and quite rightly told her to stuff it in so many words. Patricia then filed a lawsuit and all this information became public. Patricia ended up winning that lawsuit, the cabin, and the fishing retreat. Oh, and Kuralt’s wife and daughters had to pay $350,000 in property taxes on retraat out their inheritance.

That’s enough cheating for one day. Let’s move along.

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Sexy Time

Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to the comments!

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WCS

Aww, good for you, Oregon!

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WCS

Be hilarious for Indiana to run the kick back.

SonOfSpam

Alright, Oregon’s right back in this bitch!

Narrator voice: Oregon was not, in fact, right back in this bitch

rockingdog

Ducks coach gotta consider what the QB backup can do.

Feels like similar to when Alabama coach Saban benched Jalen Hurts and played Tua.
Or was it the other way around…

WCS

That’s what happened. Their subsequent NFL careers are just as weird.

Gatoraids

sadly Tua wont be able to help you answer that question

SonOfSpam

damn back problems

Brocky

mīkini holoi ipu ʻulaʻula!

‐Tua

WCS

The Playoff Bowl Games are either bizarrely entertaining, or absolute prison-bitchings.

Horatio Cornblower

Ooh! Ooh! I know which one this game is!

NotShogunButShogun

Horatio Cornblower

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King Hippo

Cignetti couldn’t help but notice – that TD pass was a half-step overthrown

Redshirt

Stop me if you’ve heard this one: the Hoosiers are back in the red zone.

Redshirt

At which point do you put in the walk-ons and the seniors?

rockingdog

Like once IU scores 42pts. There it is.

scotchnaut

“After the vegetables have been sweated.”

-J. Dahmer

NotShogunButShogun

That’s a great way to reduce the population!
*College seniors* OHH! You silly, college fitbawl seniors aren’t real!

Gatoraids

Oregon didnt already have them in the game?

Doktor Zymm

A different sort of cheating, but you really aren’t supposed to hitchhike during Olympic marathon events.
https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/how-the-1904-marathon-became-one-of-the-weirdest-olympic-events-of-all-time-14910747/

Spent a bunch of time this afternoon reading a subreddit about steam heating systems. Now have poured myself a glass of Teroldego from my favorite winemaker and switched over to my book. Happy Friday y’all!

Horatio Cornblower

I’ll check the article, but if I remember right someone had to pull out after poisoning themselves with arsenic trying some kind of weird healing remedy.

Horatio Cornblower

Close! One of the Americans was drinking some kind of concoction that included strychnine.

As one does when running a marathon.

Doktor Zymm

Yup totally normal. No idea why people don’t drink cocaine spiked whiskey during endurance sports anymore either

Redshirt

“Send Help” looks like an interesting movie. “Joker” but for quiet, mousy assistants instead of the mentally ill.

Gatoraids

The Oregon Trail always ends up in shitting yourself to death before you get to the promised land

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Brocky

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Doktor Zymm

Shitting yourself to death was one of the more popular ways to go back then
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Last edited 1 month ago by Doktor Zymm
Gumbygirl

.

Gumbygirl

I seriously don’t get it. Tenor used to always work.

Gumbygirl

.

1000008592
Horatio Cornblower

You did it!!

Gumbygirl

Gold medal in the Special Olympics!

WCS

Would Indiana winning a national championship before Notre Dame be God’s will?

NotShogunButShogun

Horatio Cornblower

/fires random tank shells in general direction of Latin America

Brocky

Mentioning God and my Alma mater…..

Hey, that’s my bit…

rockingdog

https://bsky.app/profile/lukeknox.me/post/3mbzregpgy22c

Check the thread of pics lol

🦆 ☠️

Last edited 1 month ago by rockingdog
Brocky

These Indiana Hoosiers right here i call the Marx Brothers because they are making Duck Soup!

Brocky

Ngl, I’m really fucking proud of this joke

Gumbygirl

I’m proud of you too!

Brocky

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NotShogunButShogun

I approve!

SonOfSpam

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

As you should be.

rockingdog

That’s pretty funny 🫡

Beerguyrob

Banner!

King Hippo

in all seriousness, good on Dan Lanning for being polite and decent with sideline reporter lady there

scotchnaut

“Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. I hate you. Fuck you as well.”

-Cignetti, writing in his notebook

rockingdog

In other news…Whoa

The US Department of Agriculture suspends all federal funding to Minnesota, effective immediately.

The federal government seceding from the union is a new one.

Horatio Cornblower

Rural Minnesota is pretty red, so sure, go for it. Fuck over your own supporters.

SonOfSpam

“Tread on me daddy”

-red state poor people

Redshirt

It’s all good. Screw ‘em. We got that nice, rich Venezuelan oil. That’s ready to go, right? … … right?

https://www.cnn.com/2026/01/09/politics/oil-executives-venezuela-white-house

SonOfSpam

Yeah, minor details like “VZ oil is shitty and so is the infrastructure” are for cucks

Gatoraids

when the Land O Lakes shortage hits the piggies will squeal

Redshirt

.

IMG_2885
SonOfSpam

*2026 Wild card Las Vegas Raiders

**no, YOU’RE smoking meth from an RC can

Horatio Cornblower

Well this game seems to be about over.

Brocky

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Gatoraids

Nice of espn to put on the remake of

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Coincidentally first Drive thru movie of the tonight

Redshirt
rockingdog

IU Football is a team of contrasts

LoL

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King Hippo

When Bama fires DeBoer next October, y’all reckon they offer Cignetti like $30M/yr?

clint greasewood

Currently on eight-year, $93 million contract (through 2033) with a rumored $15M buyout.

Horatio Cornblower

‘Bama would pay that buy-out and not even blink

SonOfSpam

(minimum wage in Alabama is still like $7/hr)

Horatio Cornblower

NOT FER FITBAW PAWWWWWWLLLLLLLL, WHAT SAY YEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW?????

King Hippo

look, they’ll sell ALL of their slaves if they gots to

scotchnaut

The Ducks team has that look of, “We’re totally not in FlannelLand anymore, dude!”.

NotShogunButShogun

Doubters? I got a table for Doubters…huh they quiet. Ok…
Haters! Tables for haters! Whoa not all at once! Sheesh!

Brocky

I don’t care how much IU is up, I refuse to get excited for this.

I got brockyed today. Alternator went out on my way to work.

I was on the side of a flipping tollway.

I eventually made it to work, but still

rockingdog

Yea that was a sick throw & catch for an IU TD
That’s Rocking.

King Hippo

Simpsons STOP STOP he’s already ded?? meme time?

Brocky

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Brocky

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King Hippo

It’s a good thing Mark Cuban can keep giving him raises with what is, to him, pocket change.

King Hippo

I would absolutely love that Sarratt kid on the Donks. That body control is fucking bonkers.

Redshirt

Odd, I thought birds were cooked by Kentucky Colonels, not Indiana Student Athletes.

Brocky

I found a dead pigeon on campus once.

Wasn’t cooked

Horatio Cornblower

Yet

ballsofsteelandfury

Amazing selection this week, Ayo!

Horatio Cornblower

Love how the Big Ten ad ends with “oh yeah, Rutgers is here too”

rockingdog

Seems like Ducks are getting cooked by IU

That doesn’t seem Rocking… 🦆

Absence of some key running backs seems like it’s the reason. Ok.

Last edited 1 month ago by rockingdog
scotchnaut

I’m willing to aver that absence of defense seems like it’s the reason.

rockingdog

Found a funny:

🇺🇸

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Redshirt

It’s basement-dwelling incels like that who give innocent, basement-dwelling incels like me a bad name.

King Hippo

Hey, at least you’re not a Maoist. Even ironically!

Redshirt

In theory, it makes sense but from a practical standpoint it can’t be done without corruption or usurping the many at the expense of the few.

Horatio Cornblower

“usurping the many at the expense of the few”

And just like that, Redshirt explained the entirety of human history.

Horatio Cornblower

(although I think that should be “for the benefit of the few”)

(where’s that pedant BFC when we need him?)

clint greasewood

This is were a country run by AI Marx comes in.

Horatio Cornblower

Phil Knight’s gonna have that QB’s legs broke!

King Hippo

EMPTY HAND WOO!!!!

Horatio Cornblower

/definitely Not Me in high school

NotShogunButShogun

Horatio Cornblower

/blindly unloads entire clip in general direction where accent came from

Horatio Cornblower

Using AI to write my resume and all of a sudden Fernando Mendoza isn’t the only Heisman Trophy winner taking courses in analytical geometry and calculus.

Horatio Cornblower

Mendoza’s analytical geometry and calculus doesn’t seem to be helping him right now.

Senor Weaselo

It’s all about standing and delivering in the pocket. How do you reach these receivers?

SonOfSpam

Wow, Mendoza running like ICE was chasing him for a first down.

Redshirt

The Gameplan hasn’t worked so far.

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Brocky

Hahahahaha

Senor Weaselo

Wrecks Ham beat the Robins Hood? We now go live to King Hippo with reaction.

Horatio Cornblower

The FA Cup isn’t real.

King Hippo

Also, Mendoza is like a tall Breesus, and that will be scary af if he translates to the NFL.

Brocky

I don’t see it.

Probably because the first things I associate with Brees are his shortness and that thing on his face

Last edited 1 month ago by Brocky
Horatio Cornblower

Don’t forget his grifting!

King Hippo

Leadoff and the reading gal, YOWZA.

Horatio Cornblower

I guess that technically wasn’t a hold since the Indiana center didn’t really hold the guy so much as he tossed him out of the way like he was last week’s meat loaf.

Horatio Cornblower

Fernando Mendoza seems a little too “ethnic” for Indiana.

NotShogunButShogun

Horatio Cornblower

/fires blindly into your car

SonOfSpam

Shogun is NAWT a woman, let alone a lesbian.

NotShogunButShogun

I am a PROUD male lesbian!

King Hippo

Like George Costanza said – They don’t want US, gotta respect that!

Gumbygirl

Yes, but are you a POET?

scotchnaut

Yeah, that’s why he was born in Boston, where that city’s centuries-long embrace of “those people” made for a safe environment for him to be raised.

Horatio Cornblower

Fall River is nearby; he probably passed himself off as a Portuguese fisherman who got lost.

Brocky

Fun fact, I once shared a living space with three other students at IU, and we were all a different race

1 Caucasian
1 Black
1 Hispanic
1 Pakistani

And thats not even counting the chinese roommate I had later. Guy is texting me about IU football this week

Brocky

So that IU lead was nice while it lasted.

You really got to hand it to God this season.

Raise my hopes up, and have both of the teams I follow lose playoff games in back to back days? Guy knows how to write a script

NotShogunButShogun

There hasn’t been a game in recent memory where both fanbases are as convinced they will lose.

WCS

Peach Pie Bowl!