The Bullsh*t – Lie Line: Offseason Sunday Open Thread

Lies get a bad rap. Falsehoods are the lubricant of social life. The pantomime of “How are you doing today?” and “Fine, thank you” is only a mutual acknowledgment of mores. You think that’s “wrong maaan?” Then by all means, Your Authenticness: tomorrow morning answer to someone “Hungover as fuck”. It’s

LITTLE GUYS WIN!

Lincoln City FC, a FIF division team, goes to Premier League Burnley and wins their FA Cup game 1-0. The Fox Deportes guys were, rightfully, all over the refs for totally obvious calls for Burnley. They had a legit red and PK for a hand waved off, and the Red Imps

Superb Owl LI Predictions: Steven Wright

Thanks. This game is in Texas. I thought that’s why they billed it Super Bowl Lee.   It’s the fifty-first Super Bowl but the game’s been played for 50 years. I wondered if anyone knew about the lost year. So I called Jamie Collins.   Kyle Shanahan gets credit from getting consistent, solid performances out of

Titans Are 6-6: Are Aliens Involved?

Since the birth of civilization in Greece, the power of intellect has defined human endeavors. But equity is a universal force; thus, extraterrestrials gave pyramids and abstract thought to non-European ancients. If otherworldly folks gave Egyptians and Incas a leg up, how can anyone dispute that they've helped NFL inferiors like

Amazement Is Not Leprosy Open Thread

As a ranked competitor in the World Series of Seething, I’m a fan of detachment. It is therefore distressing to see the proliferation of “that did not surprise me” as the go-to phrase for fake punditry. Bullshit: no one foresaw the Lions atop the NFC North. Not even Cootercrats. Another one

Week 8 Color Assault: Jaguars @ Titans Open Thread

Hello fans, this is the NFL. The Official Beer withdrew from this game and wanted to issue a statement. The parties settled for an undisclosed amount and a hashtag: #Out4Turdsday. So tonight the NFL hosts an Open Bar, albeit with only two selections. Indulge freely on room temperature Olde English; independent NFL sommeliers certified that cold

Photographs And Memories: BURN THEM [Titans 2016 Preview]

I was optimistic. The Bridgewater injury bummed me out, but the Bradford trade... It felt like a portent. I looked at the current roster--woof: very similar team to last year’s 3-13 squad. And then the narratives started bouncing inside my head. TITANS CROWN BRADFORD'S ASS Oh, you think that's impossible. Yet those

Live On Periscope: Tío Salamanca Gives Fantasy Draft Strategy

[3:30 sunlight shines into nursing home room with top production values.] Door Flies Open: Oh, Tío! Who knew that underneath your insatiable bloodlust there was an equally intense passion for fantasy football... DFO: Is it true that the Flex position was invented by a mule who ran with you back in Juárez? Tío Salamanca: DingDingDingDing. Nurse: Don’t

Request Line: Damaged Goods (Allegedly)

Mike Tyson is inside a radio studio, alone. His producer is behind the glass. MIKE TYSON: *looking at the glass* Turn that thermostat up. Damn! PRODUCER: *mouthing words, gesticulating to his head* MIKE TYSON: Speak up! What? *grunts, puts earphones on* PRODUCER: ...to 78, Champ. Oh, he’s here. JJ Watt walks slowly towards the producer,

Euro 2016 Preview : Sweden Contemplates Retirement

Sweden’s goalkeeper, Andreas Isaakson, has 129 caps, is retiring from the national team, and plays occasionally for his club team (Kasimpasa - Turkey). The most the Guardian could muster is that Isaakson is a dependable old pro. That same paper says that Andreas Granqvist (31, FF Krasnodar, Russia) is the “defensive mainstay”,