Min @ Ari: Everything points to this game going the Cards way, doesn’t it? Some fantasy advice I came across on one site stated, “START ALL THE CARDINALS YOU CAN!”. If this was a game of Clue As Foreign Films I’d say, “Arizona/Brando in the empty apartment with a stick of butter”. Maria Schneider, uh, the Vikes look very vulnerable right now. QB Bridgewater can’t throw a TD without an accompanying intercept later on. This year his ratio is 8/8-career-wise he’s 20/20 (ironing?). His counterpart is sporting a “hey national media, come take a look-see” 29/9. Football Outsiders’ take on Teddy cuts right through the lutefisk though-The offensive line is so bad that teams don’t need to rush more than three or four defenders to get quick pressure on the quarterback. I’m sure it’ll get better though. Whoops. That’s a no. The Vikes bread and butter defenders Barr, Joseph and Smith are all out. It’s all on you AP.
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Zimmer rates .7 Shanahans
http://49.media.tumblr.com/abe8886698c4830e5033f9b0505debdd/tumblr_nxzldusOYt1r745vdo1_540.gif
Wait – the team who lost to the 49ers isn’t considered elite?
No Flacco.
Far too much teasing of KLEEEERGH, Gene!
A surprising close score really
You show a stunning lack of faith in my imaginary gambling picks ,, smgdh
“This score couldn’t be much closer!”
-PK
Zimmer looks like he’s wearing Manning’s QB jacket.
Great body, coach.
Bridgewater strikes me with a very Chad Pennington vibe.
Whoa, whoa!
Let’s not say things we can’t take back!
At least TB isn’t made of papier-mâché!
You have compared a white QB and a black QB across eras. You are disqualified from professional footy analysis, forever.
Phils hair is developing a personality of its own.
It’s trying to escape its body.
The nice thing about Bridgewater is, if you need to conserve time, you can count on him to chuck it into the ground.
And if things get really bad, you can use him to ford a river!
Can Bridgewater even get it to the end zone from the 20?
This game would be more entertaining with JFF playing for either team.
WHY NOT BOTH?
JFF as all time QB!
hey man, if he called it, he called it
Demolished
103 year old embalmed clown, Achile Chatouilleu, displayed at the California Institute of Abnormalarts.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/cb9c055822525661fcfc27e8c3b57c4f/tumblr_nyeiz27Isa1tepew7o2_1280.jpg
Christ a’mighty, thanks for the fucking nightmare fuel
Not a problem; YOU DESERVE IT!
http://49.media.tumblr.com/206d6ac4c6b3de878294010f124432c2/tumblr_ndgexaIMpr1s01qkyo1_500.gif
YOR-FLEERGH HAS AWAKENED FROM HIS SLUMBER!
CTHULHU-EERGH STIRS IN HIS SUBTERRANEAN PRISON
NYARLFLAGTHEP WHISPERS IN THE HEARTS OF MEN, BRINGING DREAMS OF COLORS BEYOND RED AND YELLOW.
WELCOME TO COSTCO I LOVE YOU.
Oh damn! What could I possibly get Fozz this Xmas?
Hint: http://angelsenvy.com/
Bridgewater can float.
Oh sure, they can bring a fence into the stadium but they stop me when I bring a Bengal tiger to the gate. I bought a ticket for it.
I would think this would start a curse
Really? Then I need to be bring a 10 foot long Steel beam to Pittsburgh and a Minute Man brigade to Boston.
Why, yes, The U fans are just as horrid and despicable as you’d think:
http://espn.go.com/espn/story/_/id/14328380/the-miami-hurricanes-fans-flew-banners-got-al-golden-fired
I like passionate fans.
Nothing personal but … Fuck Jersey
Like Carlin says:
Kiss her where it smells, take her to New Jersey!
Wow.
This is supposed to be a safe space against Jerseyitis.
Have you ever even been here?
Jagoff.
I still can’t believe that Netflix made that film.
If I didn’t love Netflix more than I love anyone but immediate family I’d cancel my subscription.
So the guy playing Keanu in the Pointless Break remake is just a low-rent Hemsworth cousin, right? They couldn’t afford either of the actual Hemsworths, so they just called around for anyone who looks vaguely like them?
So is Adam Sandler going straight to Netflix the same as going straight to DVD?
Way, way, WAY WORSE
Isn’t Adam Sandler dead yet? Why doesn;t he take up cocaine? Maybe it would at least make him interesting.
Personally, I loved the Herm Edwards rant. Imagine being one of his kids – toilet training would take on a whole new level of intensity
SHITTERS SHIT IN THE TOILET!!
EVEN WHEN THE SHITTERS FULL!
IT’S NOT ABOUT YOU, IT’S ABOUT THE SHIT!
Bridgewater really understands the quarterback position!
::Gets surprised by two minute warning whistle::
His strong hands are great for gripping a stick to beat his child with.
Kid in one hand, switch in the other.
EVERYBODY WINS except the kid
ppl forget that
/well, at least NFL announcers conveniently seem to forget that
So fast so violent,
Setting us up for one are we Phil.
Google, how much time in jail do I get for running asshole bicyclists off the road?
DEPENDS ON WHETHER OR NOT THEY DIE
And how much evidence of their assholery you can present to the court.
Depends on if you get caught.
Hopefully long enough for your fucking asshole to get HUGE.
In Seattle? You’d get life and they’d shoot your dog
You suck, Bethel! Don’t let it touchback!
I wonder when we will have our first fop coach.
Has anyone heard back from Pie since her date? Did she remember to get OSZ to do his serial killer clearance check?
What kind of Pie?
I believe it was Hair Pie (I laugh every time I hear that phrase)
http://www.quickmeme.com/img/00/003e54d3346df68307eabc831617b4ffc71490925a0f4b19c9ad5d1632e58dbc.jpg
What the fruck is a frush?
Two sevens beats a frush.
She’s still circling the downtown, looking for her date.
:large
That was a very nice 20 yard run for a gain of one yard.
Minny better shut this down or they’re about done
Kerwynn Williams not getting any love?
I’m getting on the waiting list for the post-game Cardinal Talk because this is bullshit.
THATS WHAT A WINNER WOULD DO
You aren’t a 1st time long time kinda guy. THEY KNOW YOU!
This is the only time I have watched either of these teams all season. I feel like I haven’t missed much.
Arizona has been mighty impressive this year. Secondary and receivers have been great.
I look at their record, and assume they must be worth watching, I’m just not seeing it right now.
So if you do it wrong, your woman hates you.
If you do it right, you both come simultaneously.
SHOOTING FOR THE ID, EH TIVO???
Just don’t get any on the remote
WTF was that Tivo ad?
It’s like…..is that one of those stock trading companies?
Both my sons looked up at that one
Too hot for prime time
Some writer apparently has issued “false starting”.
I mith Mayock.
Meeth too.
Anythhhans bettther thhhan phhhSimphsss
The Land Rover rescue the lady dog sledder commercial – could they pack more whiteness into 30 seconds?
I see your Range Rover and raise you any Zales commercial.
They’re eating cabbage.
You say it like its a bad thing
Michael Bolton could be playing in the background.
THAT DRIVE, I CALL IT THE BATTLE OF BULL RUN, BECAUSE MINNESOTA DROVE THE ENTIRE FIELD, ONLY TO SCREW UP IN THE END
As long as you don’t talk shit about Minnesota at Gettysburg. Highest casualties of any regiment in the war for one battle. Well over 50%
They sure seem dedicated to throwing the ball to NAWT Diggs.
There’s a reason why those shitdicks are always wide open.
Finally decided to go turn on the game; fired up the iPad, opened Safari, no comments show up for any item on DFO. Apple is doing their best to ensure I stop using their products, it seems.
(Chrome for the iPad is working fine, by the way)
Perhaps you need to post from your iPhone
Could be.
My apple product phone works so so.
Is this a good Thursday game or is the power of Thursday compelling the teams to derp?
I think it has been fairly well played, not one-sided so far.
It’s coming up on Christmastime, so there are ghosts about.
I am The Ghost Of Mullets Past.
CONFESS YOU SHORT/LONGHAIRED FUCKS
In the 1990s I had hair out to my elbows. Chixors lurved it
I didn’t grow a mullet but I did grow my hair out when I was in college. Only my hair didn’t want to go below my collar line. I had at least six inches of hair curled up and down my neck. I thought eventually the weight would cause the hair to fall. Nope, it just kept curling.
I have the exact same problem whenever my hair reaches my collar! Weirdest fuckin thing; it just curls and curls and will grow no longer.
He only took 4 steps, pretty sure that fumble is gonna be ruled an incomplete.
Touchdown Seahawks.
And that happened
http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2014-10/12/17/enhanced/webdr10/anigif_enhanced-30599-1413148114-4.gif
Is it just me or are these announcers REALLY trying to sell me that Bridgewater is a good quarterback.
Sell you a black man? DAS RACIST!
They’ve been trying to do it since he was in college.
NARRATIVE
http://49.media.tumblr.com/4cba8aa002b93a9e733f1dc4b2d8ce5b/tumblr_ndgcus5Fvw1s01qkyo1_500.gif
Little Drummer Boy – not just the worst Christmas carol, the worst song EVER FUCKING RECORDED
Fucking “Jumped Up Kicks” by Foster The People would like all the words…
Jared Fogle disagrees.
Sorry, that dishonor goes to “Christmas Shoes.” Whoever the fuck wrote that song should have their hands burned off with acid.
http://cdn.meme.am/instances/60478918.jpg
Paul McCartney’s “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time” would like to disagree.
This is also Nuremburg-worthy.
It’s a hate crime, really.