Yes, the weekend has finally come when I have no JV NFL to preview. The world is colder and more barren than usual. And I promised my kids we would go get a Christmas tree this afternoon. Timing is not exactly coincidental. I will likely fuck my neck and/or back up (even more) and have nothing good to watch. SIGH.
But let us keep our chins up and our heads out of the oven, and focus on the EPL. The Little Foxy Engine That Could surprised everyone last weekend and re-took sole possession of first place, and Boxing Day (the day after Christmas) is generally considered the day things stop being polite, and start getting real in English footy. Leicester ain’t going away by then, folks. To the fixtures!
Norwich and Dear Beloved Everton kick things off at the ungodly hour of 7:45 EST (NBCSN), and it’s another crucial match for the Toffees as they try to get out of the mass in the upper-middle. Currently, there are seven teams on 21-23 points, clogging up slots 6-12 on the table. Everton smack dab in the middle at 9th on 22. Two weeks ago, Everton blew a 2-nil lead, then a 3-2 lead in the last 30 seconds of added time to Bournemouth. Last week, on English MNF, they hit the woodwork three times in a dominating performance that ended in another draw against Palace. Win either game, and the Blues are clear of the pack in 6th, as their goal differential predicts they should be. Irritating as fuck, but hopefully some frustration gets taken out on sad sack Norwich.
Saturday’s 10:00 window brings two interesting games – 3rd place City against desperate, reeling 15th place Swansea (NBCSN), and the two ends of the upper-middle pack, 6th place Palace and 12th position Southampton (USA). The Swans got absolutely destroyed at home by Leicester last week, and once wonderkind manager Gerry Monk might need a result just to keep his job. City looked awful themselves last week, and have been truly baffling after a red hot start to the season. The Saints are loads more fun than Palace, so hopefully they compress things in the middle even more with a victory. Definitely the most evenly matched fixture of the day.
Sunday brings three matches, but the two top end clubs each play relegation fodder (Arsenal vs. Villa at 8:30, NBCSN; Spurs vs. Barcodes at 11, NBCSN or Extra Time). The 8th place Shite of Liverpool play the slightly better than relegation fodder West Brom Albion at 11 (NBCSN or Extra Time, the website isn’t clear), so I guess one could watch that.
Monday Night Footy could be very good indeed, with Leicester hosting Chelsea. Chelsea are in 14th, and that’s where they deserve to be, based on goal differential. Don’t kid yourselves into thinking that a run to the top is imminent – they’re shit and it’s glorious. Should be an excellent showcase for the Foxes, as NBCSN loves the story, every bit as much as the front-running English press hates it.
Feel free to talk about college hoops, 1-AA footy in the comments, etc.
Interesting to see how well Army manages the clock, considering their affinity for getting bogged down in endless wars.
How’s the kid from Navy supposed to be a Heisman candidate if he can’t even shred the Army? I’m starting to wonder if he even has what it takes to be a middle east warlord with this performance.
I’m an Air Force guy, so Army-Navy doesn’t have the same appeal. What I could do without are the dozens of faux-patriotic, jingoisticly inane ads for USAA, Geico, and whatever the fuck else every break.
It’d be awesome if the Air Force just did fly byes for three hours, releasing chemtrails over the stadium and sonic-booming the crowd every 45 seconds.
That would be an acceptable use of tax dollars.
To be fair, USAA is great car insurance. Good thing my Dad served, because I sure as hell didn’t earn it.
So I don’t get this. The US Army is supposed to have some of the greatest strategic minds we have to offer. Yet they run the ball on every down and basically just use every play as an excuse to throw young, healthy bodies at their opponent to get destroyed while gaining the applause of thousands of onlookers with a complete refusal to update their tactics or….oh, right. Never mind.
If this site actually gave out comments of the week, this would be it.
They’ve never gone beyond Grant’s plan at Cold Harbor.
I think the Army QB has more arm strength than Teddy Bridgewater.
Gentlemen, I’m in a bar at the Wichita airport drinking a local beer and watching Shockers-Utes roundball. Send help.
That place has a airport?
The airport is actually very nice. Once you step outside…
If PK shows up, break a bottle over his fat face, and stab his neck flab with the shattered end.
Confirm the kill!
Seems reasonable
Oh the Army/Navy football game is on. I guess Doctors Without Borders is safe for a day.
Hey, Scotchy, A Crown For Christmas is on Hallmark right now! Drop your cock, and grab your remote! Then you can grab your cock again, because Danica McKellar is still gorgeous.
That’s it! I’m getting cable!
DAMMIT!
Nice tit! Er … I mean kit!
http://41.media.tumblr.com/226cc3b92b5f1d197521d7d84808bfde/tumblr_no2tcaZZmj1qgxas2o1_500.jpg
So, Navy’s positional helmets: Thoughts? I think it’s a nice touch.
h
ttp://eroticarta2z.com/images/erotic-calendars/sex-positions-calendar-2011/sex-positions-calendar-2011-6.jpg
http://s9.postimg.org/ez2dxvxqn/12219575_10101981985806601_2828185471704844124_n.jpg
If your arms were short and you couldn’t reach your junk you’d be pissed too.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/0d8762a999f3d248bbb2f9133442923a/tumblr_naq06nUXEn1sqap8qo5_1280.png
I hadn’t seen this before…
?oh=ac6d4138c45f8941dee75621c9911894&oe=571F5A68
I have not seen that particular combination of characters either!
“?oh=ac6d4138c45f8941dee75621c9911894&oe=571F5A68”
Fuckin’ A!
http://49.media.tumblr.com/c61b8c5ff8a22eeb22c0f7616cc10948/tumblr_nz7tjti6gr1s3rlr2o1_400.gif
You betrayed me for the last time, crl+c/crl+v!
?oh=ac6d4138c45f8941dee75621c9911894&oe=571F5A68
Oh GOD DAMNIT!
Keep ’em cool, man.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/d097145b930f0f16c51d3e3607bff588/tumblr_ny2v6ebaPr1szx6t3o1_400.jpg
http://41.media.tumblr.com/586ffdbfe60b0920f2ed110fd714c99d/tumblr_inline_nxvs35rkG51rn8hlb_500.png
North Dakota State wins a lot because they recruit winners you guys.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/c20ce3e2c8de5ea14232d67789eb229d/tumblr_n0nifxSDW91skan9uo2_r2_250.gif
Wow, very impressive win. Would love to see this side stay up.
They are looking pretty good to stay up. Some really garbage sides this season.
The cheese fries looked good, tho.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/a00e3ebe19149efb17775143275d338b/tumblr_nz2o325sWJ1uj4auio1_500.jpg
Oh, you meant something else.
Didn’t jinx it!
OK, last one: for Japan’s sake.
http://36.media.tumblr.com/a727b06263121b30b5f411cd016b8db5/tumblr_nx4px4eouk1qgthdfo1_1280.jpg
Sonoran is not with relish and is missing beans.
ARE YOU SAYING THIS VERSION IS INACCURATE TO WHAT YOU HAVE HAD!??! IT’S NOT ‘OFFICIAL’?!?
WHO CAN WE TRUST NOW?!?!?
http://45.media.tumblr.com/c7005750f91f5d66ce08c749ccf66ecf/tumblr_nya5fa5Lcb1s8gtxto1_500.gif
Crabs too!
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_1K81RKExuRA/TNdGyN8RvzI/AAAAAAAAAPI/eeO4Wcq11zk/s1600/DSC09149.JPG
Wow, is Bournemouth’s stadium tiny. Are they the smallest ever to make it to the EPL?
So is Bournemouth leading Man U 2-1 late regularly humorous or extremely humorous?
you best not have jinxed it!
http://40.media.tumblr.com/2dc2a2f3b10fabd10afed221020c8c73/tumblr_nx4px4eouk1qgthdfo4_1280.png
PERU AIN’T CAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!
http://40.media.tumblr.com/fdff42d31cb0827e5fb7065449310b07/tumblr_ny1jj0Z04j1rk5871o1_1280.jpg
What the fuck is wrong with Georgia?
And yes, my questions concerns both the state and country.
Your question is really an answer unto itself.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/9482af8158ac0dd5eaf4e29c8d6264b2/tumblr_nyoof7EzIG1tg6b8lo1_250.gif
http://40.media.tumblr.com/558c7ff0f1e47b8fd2a06412c4efff0e/tumblr_nx4px4eouk1qgthdfo3_1280.png
Ima keep doing a hogdog comparison; the Idaho and Baltimore.
Lesson Learned: Moose can’t let go of weiners.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/54bfc316c534eeb42b9118e294213dec/tumblr_ny6sqpp9sC1rvzucio1_400.jpg
/watching Doug Flutie: A Football Life
He seems like a bit of a dickbag.
I thought for sure that Melvin Bratton was gonna be something big in the NFL.
HE IS. One of my good wolven buddies is from WNY, and played football at NC State. Thusly has lots of connections amongst old players and coaches. He’s a Bills fan, still thinks that “Music City Miracle” team and Wade Phillips’ head coaching rein blew up because Flutie was such a dick (which is why Phillips went back to Johnson).
Melvin did have one shining NFL day:
http://www.pro-football-reference.com/boxscores/199001070den.htm
http://41.media.tumblr.com/67c7b4243102b3881ef3b38089c97b07/tumblr_nx4px4eouk1qgthdfo2_1280.png
Potato dog does not make sense to me.
I am intrigued by Chile’s entry, but keep that mayo to yourself, thankyouverymuch.
Avocado serves as the mashy/moist ingredient anyway.
Off to the gym. Going to work out indoors today. It’s cold and windy as a motherfucker out there so no walking.
Goddamn El Nino.
It’s 60 in the Northeast.
72 here, tomorrow I will have to put the a/c back on.
I should have done a hike today. Damn it.
/definitely tomorrow
Cold and windy where you are at? WTF?
http://31.media.tumblr.com/997f9b4e9169bfb639958bb8a6352bbc/tumblr_inline_nvo84jfvZ81scrpba_500.gif
HIPPO; MAYBE IT’S BEST: ON DAYS LIKE THIS SEA LIONS ARE IN THE CROSSWALKS.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/b305721d46de6e2672446d1e4382c165/tumblr_ny62qqPfHW1rojphdo1_1280.jpg
Right here on the damn beach.
Shit ain’t right at all.
My house 28-deg F, gusts to 30mph, snow, it is fine for walking the dog.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/3c0b2d194f635a5b0f7339a033937bea/tumblr_nml2e1x9xC1u4fjsto5_500.gif
Riddle me this, commenters. Why doesn’t Kentucky have a nationally prominent/dominant women’s basketball team? To a dumbass outsider like me this seems obvious.
Girls is supposed to stay home and watch the meth labs. Silly goose.
Sister-wives?
Tennessee took all the local talent and Connecticut takes all the national talent.
Obviously still talking about the sister-wives.
More door buster sales.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/a386ad48e29ccdce1c54bc1a5ccb8a15/tumblr_ny9ab6LVDB1u53c30o5_1280.jpg
How is Frightful not on that list? And sign me up, not real according to the fine print be damned!
schmine schprint!
Friends.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/a712a032f6162cb5aa5d3e4cff82a6bf/tumblr_ny6fau6jSW1s5kgq3o1_1280.jpg
http://41.media.tumblr.com/f0969c7f171784ba0d1e169cc9a04fb0/tumblr_ny6fau6jSW1s5kgq3o5_1280.jpg
So King Hippo, two questions: have you seen, what did you think of the last episode of the Leftovers and did you hear they were renewed for a third and final season?
I tried it for a while and just couldn’t get into it; should I give it another go?
Most definitely. The first season was a challenge and you had to get to episode 4 before you lose that whole “I feel like slashing my wrists” thing.
This past season was incredible.
I’m head over heels for Carrie Coon so that helps.
I always thought she’d wear her makeup like Taylor Manson.
I am a bleak motherfucker and that was bleak even for me. But yeah, CARRIE COON.
Also, you are the one who broke the news to me about S3 just now, so in my view you should be nominated for sainthood.
Absolutely LOVED the finale. Thought it did a great job answering one of the semi-legit critiques (that the show lacks humour). “Motherfucker!” and “Fix THAT, Jesus!!”
Also, Kevin shows a lot of grace and manners. Just cause a guy shot you, left you for dead, and sent you back to purgatory hotel to sing karoake earlier in the day, that don’t mean you can’t be neighborly.
Motherfucker may have been the line of the season.
I loved it too.
It’s a luchador, on a motorcycle, at a protest, being fired on by riot police….
Just another day in paradise.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/3eca56919e4166b6e3960625071e9a48/tumblr_ny8pjjPF0W1rqf6tdo1_1280.jpg
Is no one watching North Dakota St. vs. University of Northern Iowa?
/I’ll hang up and listen off-air
I just did my Hall & Oates tribute (H2O – 2 hydros and an oxy, WCS would be proud) so I shall be watching soon.
I’ve had a soft spot for UNI ever since Ali Longlastname drilled that ballsy three to put Kansas down back in ’10.
Out played Ian Anderson after the burrito.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/ade398c961154593729db8d1a0056987/tumblr_ny9k6wRwA21snpk21o1_1280.jpg
http://40.media.tumblr.com/ff8a6a5e50623616f74c0f799a11fa9d/tumblr_n5squ62wtB1rnhwa1o1_500.jpg
Yes it is
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSTHMxBttlU
http://49.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m5tj9nxrcb1rysi71o5_r1_250.gif
This way lies Madness.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9RhLWcSkDM
The Cramps.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/b83536f05503bcd6e410bfe345b4ed27/tumblr_nylg27ZD5O1u2l2voo1_500.jpg
Keep your nose out of other people’s business, Jake.
One of his best?
Yep.
Gittes gets stitches.
http://31.media.tumblr.com/7ca8d86bbb048c0e6bf582976fc25b47/tumblr_inline_n1qfvobkbR1r7t8ny.gif
Hey all. Just got back from hiking. Got some eggs and bacon going here. Gonna take on Yeah Right’s carintas next. No sports on my tv yet — what’s today for games?
Probably good to go outside for your exercise.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/41709702e24986529d104bd4657d9f57/tumblr_ntsjgb3xwQ1ueq1xio1_1280.jpg
Glad you’re giving this a try. Trust me with the corn tortillas and salsa.
If you want to get crazy here’s a quick bean recipe.
1 pound bag of pinto beans cleaned sorted and rinsed.
1 onion chopped
5 cloves of garlic minced
1 teaspoon of chili powder
1 teaspoon of cumin
Salt and pepper to taste.
4 pieces of bacon uncooked.
Throw everything but the bacon in a pot, cover with water and simmer for 2 1/2 to 3 hours. Stir occasionally. After cooking throw the bacon in a pan and cook. Eat the bacon but add the bacon grease to the beans. Stir and cook for 15 minutes more. Mash up about half of the beans with a masher or the side of a spoon.
Serve and be happy.
Can most definitely top with shredded cheddar cheese.
Maybe this will help:
http://40.media.tumblr.com/8caabdf3ddbd4047762a138f5a430fa1/tumblr_nsdkagZ03E1qfthy3o1_1280.jpg
King Hippo anyway.
The worst part about this hangover is that complaining about it doesn’t make it feel the slightest bit better.
Pedia-lyte.
Would this guy lie to you?
Today is the day I must fulfill my grandfatherly duties and sit through another 3 hours of the Nutcracker ballet. Number 1 granddaughter is dancing in the performance for a record six years in a row.
There are some very cool moments, when she’s on stage and some other moments, when she’s not.
It’s like an acid flashback and not always a good flashback.
I’ll try to make a comment or two during intermission. God help me.
At one point, I had a black power version of this in my head that I used to get through it. Try your best to conjure it up. Raise yo fist!
Also, as I posted in the Ratbirds entry, make sure you value the time with your friends. If you’ve fallen out of touch, call them and grab a beer or coffee. Hell, just call them.
I lost a buddy this week to a sudden heart attack, and as I said before, I am fucking furious at the universe. I’m also mad at myself, because I fell out of touch with a solid guy – one of those guys that you say, “Yeah, he’s one of the good ones.”
Okay, rant over. I’m going to go decorate the house with Mrs. Fozz and drink and because it’s nice outside, fuck wearing pants. Let the neighbors gawk, and be jealous.
Sorry about your loss.
Sorry here as well. You make a great point, hug your family and friends. Often.
That was the best art of the Valvano speech. The “laugh, think, cry” being the three things you should do every day. In the 30 for 30, they show the speech he did at the Duke game, to commemorate 10 year anniversary of the 1983 team (he was announcing for ABC, I was there, and cried like a baby, as did everybody in the arena). MUCH BETTER than the ESPY speech they show. And he talked about how we don’t use the word “love” enough as a culture, and he was naming those players one by one “Thurl, I love ya. Terry, I love ya.”
Still gets me right in the feels. It’s ok to cry and have feelings as long as sports are at least tangentially involved.
/yes, ladies, these really are the rules us menfolk live by (even the semi-enlightened ones)
“Yeah, he’s one of the good ones.”
::black friend joke::
THIS SOCCER, I CALL IT TOLERANCE, BECAUSE AMERICANS CAN’T UNDERSTAND WHAT IT IS, BUT THEY HATE IT ANYWAY
Nice! How fucking on point.
COTW right here.
Next week’s tag line.
And it begins….TBOX is today, the first drunk people in Santa hats just walked by. Though they probably aren’t that drunk yet.
If you would kick every one of them in the nuts for me, Hippo would greatly appreciate it.
/also for any in Cubs hats.
Cubs fans were all happy yesterday cause of Cubs stuff that happened. I just smiled, nodded, and talked about football.
Why does no one deliver Thai food at 8:45 am? What a bunch of breakfast fascists.
Holy crap, some pad see ew and red curry sounds glorious.
I’m upset that the place near me that did amazing Panang curry nachos closed. Gonna have to try and replicate them at some point.
If they turn out right you’re going to have to share that recipe with the rest of us.
Did anyone see that special fucking goal other than me?
Going Christmas and birthday shopping today. This will be my anthem:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1iAYhQsQhSY
Shopping tip: bourbon, beer, bourbon, cigar, bourbon, unleash the credit cards.
People on your list will be surprised, amazed, and worried about you.
The wife and I are doing the same thing. 65 and sunny here in Connecticut, so you know I’m in the Christmas mood.
For me, this is a Christmas season tune:
Great album.
The first three songs are the best three song opening sequence of any album ever, perhaps. FANTASTIC driving album.
I am still of the opinion that these are the coolest muthafuckas alive:
/pre-match music WOO
My nearly 6 year-old daughter watched Star Wars for the first time last night.
It was fun, seeing her reactions. And it was rewarding that despite her growing up in the age of CGI and Pixar, she didn’t sneer at the 40 year-old special effects, bad acting, bad writing, bad directing, etc. She loved it, and it was special for me, watching it again through her eyes.
And thus, another Star Wars nerd was born.
I felt that way when my progeny enjoyed Christmas Vacation.
Similar forays into other nerd pleasures of mine youth have not succeeded.
My daughter is either the coolest kid at school, or the nerdiest (or both). Good thing she’s tall and has been learning the kung fu I randomly teach her.
She’d be perfectly at home growing up 40 years ago (minus the Internet giving her on-demand access to everything), because she loves Schoolhouse Rock, old cartoons, my music, etc.
My kids don’t clamor for the Wiggles or other juvenile shit when we get in the car. My 3 year-old son wants Badlands (Jake E. Lee’s band) or Whitesnake, my daughter wants Van Halen. Sometimes we have to compromise on Joe Satriani.
It can be both!
You’re doing fucking amazing work as a parent, just FYI.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1cbsLKXasQ
That’s the good shit! Wakin’ my grumpy ass up.