Your Week 16 Sunday Nighter Open Thread

NYG @ Min: According to one Giants fan site, D coordinator Steve Spagwhatever is still stewing about the loss to the Panthers. Buddy, you’ve got so much more to worry about than yet another defensive collapse. I just can’t see how he’ll be around next year. Sure he was dealt a bad hand (hah!) but there is next to no intensity on his unit (phrasing!) and the “powers” that be need a sacrificial lamb. It looks like Minny has a number of D guys ready to go today so I expect a whooping. The Vikes D was a dominating piece of work before injuries became an issue. I’m thinking a heavy dose of RB Peterson should make everything all good for Minny. That said, the Giants have a lousy habit of winning games they’re not supposed to. Did I make this game seem watchable? I’ll hang up and listen off air.

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entropy

Hey, does anyone remember yesterday afternoon, when this game kinda mattered for BOTH teams playing?

montythisseemsstrangetome

Thanks to beer, I don’t even remember my name.

Marty, I think.

...

Bud Light posited a Giants-Steelers Super Bowl.

Hehehehe.

montythisseemsstrangetome

THIS GAME IS BORING WHERE ARE ALL THE TOUCHED DOWNS?

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Brandon Fusco owned count: 22

entropy

SHUT THE FUCK UP CRIS

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Al-Jazeera reports Peyton Manning fingers his butt while watching his own highlights and screaming, “JIM MORA JUNIOR AIN’T SHIT COMPARED TO DADDY!”

Romonobyl

Guess I’m ordering Dominos then.

Doktor Zymm

How cold is it there? It’s above freezing here, I think. If it’s only in the 20’s I’m gonna scoff at them. Full on scoff.

entropy

14 degrees in Minneapolis.

Doktor Zymm

Ehh…okay, that’s cold. But still only medium jacket cold. They should know how to dress for that after these last two polar vortex years.

blordinaryfagicmox

POLAR VORTEX! Spanish for…. the VORTEX!

Doktor Zymm

POLAR BART, POLAR

Is Zimmer challenging Coughlin to a ruddy face off?

Doktor Zymm

Sendejo? Pendejo!

Doktor Zymm

Probably not, I really know nothing about him. He’s probably lovely.

montythisseemsstrangetome

Most football players are.

Romonobyl

I heard the same thing. When I first moved here 30 years ago I befriended a Mexican dude who taught me some of the lingo…only wrong. Pendejo, I was told, meant special friend. Dick move, but he’s still my bud and would fit right in here.

Doktor Zymm

Yeah, he seems a’ight.

Doktor Zymm

It’s safer to fall off of a tall horse than a short horse, because you have more time to adjust your fall. I assume it’s kind of the same thing with running backs, if you line up further back, you have more time to know where to go. It’s still a matter of seconds and instinct, but it’s the difference between rolling on your shoulder/breaking your neck and the difference between finding the whole and breaking to open field and running into 3 defenders who read the formation.

Romonobyl

I got thrown off a donkey once (true story bro), so I guess that doesn’t apply.

King Hippo

did the show go on?

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

However it still says a lot when you’re skills are so limited in shotgun, that Matt fucking Asiata replaces you on 3rd down.

Sill Bimmons

I was on a horse once…

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Porky Prime

That’s what I felt like in Albuquerque last night. Why is it that people are total retards trying to drive on ice? Took me 4 hours to make the 38 mile commute. Assholes in trucks passing me left and right going 45. 30 minutes later, my POS Mazda 5 with bubble gum tires is creeping past all the big bad trucks spinning their wheels in the gutters.

Romonobyl

Gonna get in the 40’s tonight here in S. Texas. Folks here tend to go apeshit anytime they can see their breath.

Sill Bimmons

Too quick.

A recycling 2 centigrade bath would keep him alive and twitching for days.

...

I was ready to call bullshit on Collinsworth “when all the teams in this division played outdoors” but they all did before 1975. I did not realize this.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Then those Canadian rednecks turned the Met into a mall!

Sill Bimmons

“…last year, the child abuse charges…”

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montythisseemsstrangetome

I know, right, when are they going to let that go?

Sill Bimmons

I guess they’re just trying to stick with it.

Switching it up at this point doesn’t make much sense.

Porky Prime

Just my size!

Moonbatting Average

MEN. That tornado that killed all those people around Dallas jumped Oak Cliff (our neighborhood) and downtown before slamming down on Garland to the NE. Scary as shit, especially since my wife was home alone and I was 200 miles away and could do nothing.

montythisseemsstrangetome

Had you been home could you have stopped the tornado?

Seriously, hope everything’s ok.

Moonbatting Average

Everything’s okay here. Couldn’t have done much, just would rather not have had my wife terrified by herself

blordinaryfagicmox

He could’ve done SOMETHING
http://i.imgur.com/91sn32Q.jpg

Horatio Cornblower

Maahky Fahckin’ Mahk woulda stawpped that fahckin’ tawnaydo.

Doktor Zymm

Congrats on the non-hit. Hope y’all got a storm cellar though.

Sill Bimmons

CLIMATE DISRUPTION IS A LIE

Sill Bimmons

In honor of the best Star Wars film since this one:

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Porky Prime

The 2600 version was badass too. Broke a controller on it once.

Activision Decathlon broke two. Savage repetitive stress. I’m surprised there wasn’t an outbreak of Atari Elbow back then.

Doktor Zymm

Oh look! Jawing! Things may get, “Chippy” I think is the term?

Sill Bimmons

Chewy!

Wakezilla

Uh oh. We’re 2 years away from the announcers constantly talking about Minnesota’s cold outdoor stadium as the ultimate home field advantage, aren’t we?

montythisseemsstrangetome

By “years”, you mean “minutes”, right?

Sill Bimmons

IT WILL NOT EVER REPLACE THE FROZEN TUNDRA

...

So, why aren’t we calling JPP, Jason Pierre-Paw?

montythisseemsstrangetome

You’re only going to watch 3 plays?

Doktor Zymm

They didn’t make JPP change it to “Poor Decisions U?”

His Right Honorable Lord Lordship the Lordly

Explode So Hard University

Porky Prime

“Shop Class”

blordinaryfagicmox

Is it raining or did JPP have a hand in the pregame ceremonies?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYOOOOOOOO!!

O/U on Brandy Coughlin drinks during the course of the game to stay warm.

Doktor Zymm

Where’s the Great Dane?

Sill Bimmons
Doktor Zymm

“With no receivers who can catch Eli Manning’s passes, we’re just gonna hand it off to….who are our running backs? Or throw it underneath, or pretend we’re playing the Patriots and just chuck it downfield to some guy wearing a helmet”

JerBear50

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montythisseemsstrangetome

Don’t look at him funny, Michelle.

Wakezilla

AP’s arms were so veiny, me thinks he and Bane swapped venom recipes.

Doktor Zymm

“Shit, I don’t remember any of this….are you sure this is where I read to Kindle? Fine, how fast can you turn back the pages?”

Wakezilla

Here we go Giants, here we go!

/is all in for the Falcons making the playoffs despite insurmountable odds.

montythisseemsstrangetome

Did you know that the Jaguars were still alive going into this weekend?

Wakezilla

I did! As I said in the morning thread, I was really hoping the Titans could steal one against the Texans, but, not all that upset because the Titans are going to Titans.

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Went through another year without watching the Titans. STILL no regrets!

montythisseemsstrangetome

I’M SO PUMPED FOR SUNDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL NOW THANKS TO THE OPENING WITH THAT BLONDE CHICK SINGER!

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

DID SOMEONE SAY BLONDIE!?!?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Porky Prime

http://gamesdbase.com/Media/SYSTEM/Mattel_Intellivision/Snap/big/Star_Strike_-_1981_-_Mattel_Electronics.jpg

Personal favorite. Closest thing to a Death Star trench run that Mini-Porky had when he was a wee porker.

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Pffft, had….
/just kidding

Sill Bimmons

I lost a shocking number of Earths trying to remember how to play that last night.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

TO BE FAIR; I HAVE AN ODD ELEVATOR BUTTON RITUAL TOO!!

entropy

So in that participation trophy car commercial, anyone else get the feeling he’d have smashed his kid’s trophy if they DIDN’T win every game?

Sill Bimmons

goddammit

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blaxabbath

Watching ARI beat down GB then getting to see the end of STL/SEA made my day. I’m not pushing my luck with the SNF broadcast. So I’m cooking dinner and listening to Cardinals Talk. Get ready for some hot take about how Palmer was left in too long this week!

John Difool

So which Odell Beckham shows up tonight…. America’s sweetheart apple pie eating Beckham or angry repressed hiding out in the closet Beckham?

entropy

Um…. neither.

John Difool

Is he actually suspended?

entropy

Yup.

John Difool

Damn, I could have sworn I heard he won the appeal back on Mon. or Tues. Shows you how much I’ve been keeping up.

montythisseemsstrangetome

There’s a THIRD Beckham????

Wakezilla

Hey, if you were popped up on HGH, you’d be moody too

Porky Prime

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entropy

Husky guys? They’re all slightly overweight?

entropy

So I skipped out on the Packers game, drank a little with the neighbors (they drank outside with me on Christmas Eve night until about 3 AM Christmas morning, seemed rude to decline the invite), and after seeing the final score, I was SMRT to do so.

But I’m back home now and back with my whiskey and I’m gonna finish the fucker by halftime. There is a little less than half the bottle left.

entropy

It’s gonna get weird in here soon.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
entropy

And like that, it got weird in here.

montythisseemsstrangetome

The Packers skipped out on today’s game too. HEY-OOOOOO!

Sill Bimmons

I finished two places above my slot in the draft order in the insanity league.

entropy

This has the best image name ever.

Sill Bimmons

Finally got the Intellivision hooked up at my sister’s.

It’s as wonderful and awful as I remembered.

http://www.scottdecker.com/video_games/intellivision_atlantis_screen_1.jpg

entropy

Is this Atlantis?

Sill Bimmons

Yep.

entropy

Hah. I loved that game.

Sill Bimmons

It’s like a better version of Missile Command.

Doktor Zymm

Okay, I’ve got my cup of gin flavored with additional alcohol. I’m ready for the games to begin, but I’m willing to play Assassin’s Creed for a bit during the interim.

Shogun Marcus

I’ve been playing that too while avoiding the packers being killed.

Sill Bimmons

I slept through the whole day.

Still pretty tired.

I don’t know how you people with kids do that all day every day.

montythisseemsstrangetome

It’s actually preferable to sleep through the whole day when you have kids.

Bloody Lethal

As a Giants fan, I’m pretty sure I shouldn’t watch this game.

Doktor Zymm

As a [*Redacted] s fan, i’m actually reasonably sure they’re gonna win this game.

John Difool

You mean, you don’t want to just watch those draft picks melt away? I don’t blame you, this will probably be the most well executed game the Giants have played all season

Sill Bimmons

hey guys

bourb0nblues

sup

Doktor Zymm

The AFC is stupid. This game is also stupid. I’m making a GIANT martini. Not a Giant’s martini. They can’t have my martini.

...

Amazon has a $3 cocktail instruction book for Kindle. I’m tempted to buy it.

Doktor Zymm

Why?

...

To learn how to make cocktails, I guess.

Doktor Zymm

Go with a classic guide, or just learn shit off the internet. Don’t learn from a discount Amazon book.

...

But I wanna make stupid impulse purchases!

Doktor Zymm

Really? A $3 stupid impulse purchase? You can do better.

...

I’ll try! 😀

Doktor Zymm

Maybe buy a basic guide on how a toilet works?

JerBear50

You need a book to say “pour over ice?”

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