MLK Day Night Thread For #ALLLIVESMATTER

Don’t you love when white men solve racism on their own? It’s a beautiful thing. Now, if they could only get around to paying that child support…

So now that football season is officially over (NANANANANANNA I CAN’T HEAR YOU NANANANANA), we’re really shifting into other things. I am uncomfortable with this. Anyway, tonight has a couple of very interesting JV hoops games. The first features Syracuse traveling to #20 Dook, in a game I suspect more than a few of us around here may have certain feelings about who they want to prevail. Tip is at 19:00 EST on TWWL. The late game could be really fun, as #19 Iowa State hosts #1 Oklahoma. Before the season, the Cyclones were considered the top threat to end Kansas’ 11-year run as Big 12 champions. A loss to the Sooners in their first conference game was the start of a 1-3 start in Big 12 play. Meanwhile, the Sooners are #1 for the first time since 1990. 21:00 EST on TWWL. Get your popcorn and your adult beverages.

The NHL only has a handful of games, most notably the Ice Stillers visiting the Ice (late) Rams in Street Louis. Puck drop is 20:00 EST/19:00 for you weirdos in time zones that don’t matter. The rest of the slate is mostly dogs, as Edmonton travels to Florida, Winnipeg hosts the Avalanche, Jack Eichel goes to Phoenix, and Ottawa goes all the way out to San Jose. Not exactly a who’s-who of talent, though Florida has been a major surprise this season.

There’s some pro hoops on TNT, but don’t look to me to have any info or interest. TWWL2 has The Australian Open, tennis’ first major of the year, at 21:00. If you like grunting and clapping, tune in.

LET THE EMOTIONAL RECOVERY DRINKING COMMENCE, AND AS ALWAYS, FUCK THE PATRIOTS.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“I am happy to join with you today in what will go down in history as the greatest demonstration for freedom in the history of our nation. Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of their captivity.

“But one hundred years later, the Negro still is not free. One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languished in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land. And so we’ve come here today to dramatize a shameful condition.

“In a sense we’ve come to our nation’s capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men, yes, black men as well as white men, would be guaranteed the ‘unalienable Right’ of ‘Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.’ It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note, insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check, a check which has come back marked ‘insufficient funds.’

“But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. And so, we’ve come to cash this check, a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice.

“We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of Now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to lift our nation from the quicksands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of God’s children.

“It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment. This sweltering summer of the Negro’s legitimate discontent will not pass until there is an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality. Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, but a beginning. And those who hope that the Negro needed to blow off steam and will now be content will have a rude awakening if the nation returns to business as usual. And there will be neither rest nor tranquility in America until the Negro is granted his citizenship rights. The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges.

“But there is something that I must say to my people, who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice: In the process of gaining our rightful place, we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred. We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again, we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force.

“The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed the Negro community must not lead us to a distrust of all white people, for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny. And they have come to realize that their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom.

“We cannot walk alone. And as we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead. We cannot turn back.

“There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, ‘When will you be satisfied?’ We can never be satisfied as long as the Negro is the victim of the unspeakable horrors of police brutality. We can never be satisfied as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. We cannot be satisfied as long as the Negro’s basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as our children are stripped of their self-hood and robbed of their dignity by signs stating: ‘For Whites Only.’ We cannot be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until ‘justice rolls down like waters, and righteousness like a mighty stream.’

“I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow jail cells. And some of you have come from areas where your quest — quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive. Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to South Carolina, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed.

“Let us not wallow in the valley of despair, I say to you today, my friends. And so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

“I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal. I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

“I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice. I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

“I have a dream today! I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of ‘interposition’ and ‘nullification’ — one day right there in Alabama little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

“I have a dream today! I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, and every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight; ‘and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed and all flesh shall see it together.’

“This is our hope, and this is the faith that I go back to the South with. With this faith, we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith, we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith, we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.

“And this will be the day — this will be the day when all of God’s children will be able to sing with new meaning: My country ’tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the Pilgrim’s pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring!’ And if America is to be a great nation, this must become true.

“And so let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania. Let freedom ring from the snow-capped Rockies of Colorado. Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California. But not only that: Let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia. Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee. Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring.

“And when this happens, when we allow freedom ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual: ‘Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!’”

JerBear50
JerBear50

But does he have any tattoos?– Jerry Richardson

upforwhatever
upforwhatever

TL;DR

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Jerry Richardson’s earlobes? MLK’s tattos? So your name is a misnomer. That’s OK, as most Americans have the same attention span as you do.

upforwhatever
upforwhatever

I have a drwam that one day they’ll develop a sarcasm font so motherfuckers can figure out I’m joking.

upforwhatever
upforwhatever

I have a dream that one day they’ll develop a sarcasm font so motherfuckers can figure out I’m joking.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

JerBear; that was funny.

theeWeeBabySeamus

It’s been fun gents and lady. But if I don’t start Deadwood now, then I won’t be able to finish S2 and get to bed by 3am and I’ll miss out on my 3 hours beauty sleep.
/just figured out why I’m ugly as shit.
//never mind, I’ve always been this ugly.

Night folks.

Doktor Zymm

Enjoy!

theeWeeBabySeamus

You as well.
Adieu. 😉

Doktor Zymm
theeWeeBabySeamus

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Doktor Zymm
Doktor Zymm
SonOfSpam

Looks good until you realize the entire patty is a live stingray.

JerBear50
JerBear50

That wouldn’t stop Steve Irwin.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Chances that several dogs lost their lives to make that burger?
>80%

Doktor Zymm
Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

Looks like their burger list was better than their coffee list.

JustStopDude
JustStopDude

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Porky Prime
Porky Prime

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Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

You know wasn’t into trick shots? James Earl Ray.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

The fact I’m forgetting to type entire words in my terribly offensive jokes is probably a sign I need to sleep.

theeWeeBabySeamus
SonOfSpam

Oh sure, hit the WHITE ball first. Racist asshole.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

#CUEBALLLIVESMATTER

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons
SonOfSpam

Really really really really stupid. I hope.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

Betting on incompetence is often a safe bet.

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

The lack of direct flights to the Caribbean from the northeast angers me.

Doktor Zymm

Yeah, unless you’re going to San Juan you’re SOL

SonOfSpam

#whitepeopleproblems

Also, can you believe the price of gruyere lately?

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

My fave cornichons are up to $5.99 a jar!

How am I supposed to enjoy my Ibérico charcuterie without a reasonably priced bitter acid to cut the delicious fat?

http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7445/11728686693_4d4572b1a5_b.jpg

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I was told direct flights from DC to Bermuda are a good deal. Have not personally investigated yet.

monty this seems strange to me

Hey WCS, the Ice (no football team) s beat the Ice Stillers.

I don’t really care about hockey but drunk and I don’t really care about hockey but drunk.

Doktor Zymm

Hehe, “Butt drunk”

theeWeeBabySeamus

Considering how hard this just made me laugh, and the fact that I’m mostly sober (I’ve only had a few small sips of bourbon in the past 15 minutes….like seriously small), I am now genuinely concerned I might be going insane.

Still laughing. I’m getting more worried.

SonOfSpam
theeWeeBabySeamus

Some assholes can’t hold their booze.
That deserves a rimshot.
/two jokes there…does that mean it’s DP?

I’ll be here all week folks. Please tip your waitresses. Just the tip.

Oh goddamn I can’t turn it off!!!!!!

Doktor Zymm

I’m going to go drink a lot of herbal tea. Having to pee is the best way to wake up at 4:50 am.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hiring someone to hit you with a crowbar works better.
Admittedly, recovery time is a bit longer though.

Doktor Zymm

I would prefer not to immediately lose consciousness again. And it seems like going to gym in the morning would be more difficult with multiple blunt trauma wounds.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Some people hate a full bladder, others hate contusions.
I never said it wasn’t a trade off.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
theeWeeBabySeamus

He’s not here.
I’ll take it.

SonOfSpam

I’ve been trying to eat a little healthier, so that pic is giving me some kind of weird reaction.

Oh, it’s a boner. Been a while.

theeWeeBabySeamus

OK, if SOS has been anywhere near that burger, I no longer want it.

SonOfSpam

Hey, the sauce is a cum reduction, so it’s totally not gay.

theeWeeBabySeamus
theeWeeBabySeamus

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Porky Prime
Porky Prime

FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUU-

SonOfSpam

Nice shade of lipstick.

Doktor Zymm
theeWeeBabySeamus
theeWeeBabySeamus

There’s no melanin showing.
Dat diagram be racist as fuck.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons
JustStopDude
JustStopDude

I was reviewing the drawings and the logic for this trip to Japan coming up soon. I discovered that the drawings we shipped to the suppliers and given to me for the shakedown…are wrong. Like really wrong.

So all the weird problems I had in Detroit…I could have easily fixed or prevented if people actually…did our drawings correct. I brought it up to my management…and proceeded to get bitched out that I shipped replacement parts because I thought we had blown boards.

You got to love meetings that go 180 degrees in a the wrong direction you expect. I just stood there dumbfounded as managers complained that I couldn’t just design this equipment on the fly.

theeWeeBabySeamus
theeWeeBabySeamus

Sumbitchin’ imgur links…should checked that before I hit post.
Let’s try another, probably won’t be funny anymore anyway.
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdnqr9YazA1qa1kkvo1_400.gif

theeWeeBabySeamus

Fucking A, holy shitsnacks, WTF??

Glenn Frey found dead.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Sill started celebrating in the previous post.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Not celebrating, just making a macabre joke.

That never happens around here.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Neither does sarcasm…

theeWeeBabySeamus

Guess I’m slow today in general.
Lack of alcohol no doubt.
Time to either start drinking or watch Deadwood.
Probably both.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Dude had ulcerative colitis and a host of other autoimmune syndromes.

That’s a tough way to go out.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Indeed.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

And I need to put on layers and head to Union station to pick up the lady. Anyone else need a ride from a non-shitty DC driver?

Doktor Zymm

In the land of the blind, the one eyed man gets killed for being a witch.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

^^^ reply fail ^^^

theeWeeBabySeamus

I got better.
/awesome line

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

Since Joe Walsh set me off, I’m going to make this a night of rants FJM style. Anyone want to hear a haughty Boomer shaking his finger at the shitty Millennial generation that’s going to DOOM America? OH YES YOU DO.

http://www.foxbusiness.com/features/2016/01/18/millennial-mindset-and-americas-productivity-crisis.html

…a recent run inspired me to come up with three resolutions of my own. Actually, they’re not for me. I’m long past the point where self-improvement is even a remote possibility, as you can tell from my somewhat sadistic observations.

That’s right! I’m already perfect. So perfect, in fact, that you should be blessed that I offer up a glimpse what perfection could be: Self-aggrandizing, tone-deaf finger-shaking.

Since the dawn of Web 2.0, the blogosphere and social media, Millennials have been branded as the entrepreneurial generation – a new breed of wunderkinds spearheading a movement that’s sweeping the globe. The hype and the sensational headlines have been overwhelming:

But that turned out to be far more myth than reality. As I explain in my new book,

I have a book! Read my book!

Millennials have actually been the least entrepreneurial generation to hit the workforce in modern history, perhaps because they see entrepreneurship as a mindset that has nothing to do with actually starting a company. Unfortunately, wishful thinking does not lead to jobs or GDP.

That’s right, you can’t just wish a job into existence! You need to try to create your own and just wish it’ll work! I have a 401K that needs to grow–obviously you shitheads don’t know what one of this is–and I need a minimum 7% annual return!

Instead of climbing the corporate ladder and building their careers or starting companies and creating new jobs, they’re opting for the perceived freedom, flexibility and control of self-employment. That may sound like utopia for someone who doesn’t mind skating by and living hand-to-mouth, but as an economic trend, it spells disaster.

That’s right! Our real problem is that we don’t want security. That’s stupid. We love working a multitude of jobs with no security and low pay. We’re just too special for a full-time job with benefits or a house or a funded retirement account. We love serving you coffee to payoff the five or six figure debt you told us we had to take on to be REAL adults while you sneer at our liberal arts degree. IT’S YOUR PUNISHMENT FOR ASKING FOR SKIM!

We have an aging population of retiring boomers starting to take advantage of the entitlements they’ve paid into and been promised. At the same time, we have more and more people taking part in a laundry list of government social programs, from healthcare and food assistance to public housing and welfare.

If we don’t start treating Millennials – the largest demographic in our nation’s history – as individuals and hold them accountable for becoming productive members of society, how in the world are we going to increase productivity, return to robust growth, pay down our national debt, and fit the bill for all those entitlements?

I HAVE ENTITLEMENT CHECKS TO COLLECT SOON, YOU LITTLE SHITS, AND YOU’D BETTER PAY UP! Where am I going to get my work-free money so I can sit back and living the dream offering patronizing advice about how you don’t want to work (it’s in my book!) if you aren’t supporting me?! GET TO WORK. (And read my book!)

* * *

Holy shit, I know a lot of you are probably of this generation, but where the fuck does this shit come from?

King Hippo

As I have noted before, once the bloodletting starts, I will be 100% ok with it, even if I’m on the fucking receiving end. It’s beyond asking, it’s being BEGGED for at this point.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

My generation is largely accepting of the idea that’ll get no Social Security, which is probably not accurate. Regardless, we’ll be the ones having to figure out how to fix it so we don’t starve after 65.

American Pie Story
American Pie Story

Yeah what the fuck is retirement?

Doktor Zymm

Dude, you have a decent job, and a decent retirement plan. Just save some money. Or, spend all that money on booze and cheeseburgers and hope you die first.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

I’m actually expecting that rage and my stupid attachment to the Cubs will kill me before I’m eligible to collect anything anyway.

Doktor Zymm

Yeah, I can see that. I’m pretty sure “Cubs fandom” is up there on the list of cardiovascular disease risk factors.

Doktor Zymm

The only reason journalists give names to generations is so the previous generation can talk shit about them more efficiently. I’m pretty sure this was started by “The Greatest Generation” who also gave themselves the name “The Greatest Generation.”

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

No doubt.

Oh, and I *adore* the part where he says we need to start treating as individuals a group he repeatedly refers to as a single, homogeneous bloc.

You can’t invent fuckers like this.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

WISHFUL THINKING IS EXACTLY WHAT LEADS TO JOBS AND GDP YOU FUCKING DICKHEAD WISHFUL THINKING IS WHY YOU HAVE A JUKEBOX IN YOUR POCKET AND APPLE IS A 12-FIGURE COMPANY

https://youtu.be/E3s-qZsjK8I

SonOfSpam

Sill, I enjoy when your head explodes.

Beerguyrob

Canadian health care means I’ll die waiting for my free operation.

*not dying

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

I do really appreciate the part where he scolds kids for not being entrepreneurs because they won’t get jobs working for someone else.

Dude can’t even get his own fucking thesis straight.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

That Tarasenko kid might be OK at this hockey thing.

Beerguyrob

He’s got a move or two.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

GEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

/still don’t know how I feel about the Hagelin trade

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

He’s fast, but disappears for long stretches of time. Not pleased hes back in the division.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Curiouser and curiouser…

“On Ted Cruz’s Canadian birth certificate, his mother is listed as Eleanor Darragh Wilson, using the last name of her first husband, Alan Wilson. The Fort Worth native and long-time resident of London, Wilson is now an unwitting player in the drama that surrounds Cruz’s family.

Wilson, who has never previously spoken about his past with the news media, told McClatchy in a telephone interview from London that he did not realize he was connected to the U.S. Texas senator, however indirect. He didn’t realize that his first wife, Eleanor, whose maiden name is Darragh, had such a well-known son, whose citizenship is at issue in the presidential campaign, or that “Wilson” is on the birth certificate.”

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Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

God, after years of dealing the Obama birth certificate sideshow, I’ll launch myself across the room on a rope of my own schadenjizz if the same issue sinks the most Backpfeifengesicht candidate of the whole damned Tea Party.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

I think of all the sentences I’ve ever written, this one is my favorite.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

If found it most Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsaufgabenübertragung-
sgesetz.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

I admire the German commitment to compound words.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

It really is Siebenhundertsiebenundsiebzigtausendsiebenhundertsie-
benundsiebzig.

Beerguyrob

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Every time I see a stumble on a different photo from this shoot, it seems to be betterer than the one before…..
http://webdomination.co/photos/gillian-jacobs/alison-brie-and-gillian-jacobs-beach-584ad779550dfca5b7f58f729172b3c0-big-89304.jpg

theeWeeBabySeamus

“see a stumble on a”
That’s code for I need to start drinking.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Should have used a racquetball bat…

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Aw, come on!

Racquetball bats are the SEXAY

theeWeeBabySeamus
Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Icing the puck on the PP.

Mother. Fucker.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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litre_cola

Ice Bombers v Ice Donks is very good right now. It will be amazing if Carey Price stays injured an no teams from Canadia make the playoffs.

King Hippo

That would be a very sad thing. Canadia deserves better.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

What?

Fuck Canadia.

Everything is better there except the weather.

They even have KFC delivery fachrissakes.

WE SHOULD HAVE KFC DELIVERY IT’S OUR FUCKING THING

I’ll take their hockey and bathe in their gravy-scented tears.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Build another wall.
-D. Trump

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons
theeWeeBabySeamus

Ooooh….can we have laser cannons?
OH PLEASE SAY WE CAN HAVE LASER CANNONS!!!!!

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons
Doktor Zymm

I can get KFC delivered in Chicago. I never have, but I could. I just looked.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Fried chicken delivery in Chicago, eh?

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Doktor Zymm

You can get most stuff delivered in any decently sized city, in this particular case, KFC is on Grubhub. However, there are also services that will pick up food from wherever and bring it to you. Those tend to have a higher delivery fee though.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

You’d think I would have similar services available here where I can practically see the Outerbridge and Verrazzano from my backyard, but no.

No local participation in GrubHub, Shoprunner, Eat24, nothing.

Monmouth County is stuck in 1976.

Doktor Zymm

Damn, that sucks. You should hire a lackey. I hear young people nowadays enjoy low-paying menial jobs.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Ice Stillers 1 — 1 Ice Carpetbaggers end 1st.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Evening, gents and lady. I played racquetball today for the first time in like five years and am now exhausted. Someone please pour scotch directly into my mouth so I don’t have to get off the couch.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

I’ve never even held a racquetball bat.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Calling it a bat makes that fact no so secretive.
/no offense intended

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

I guess I should have said “stick.”

/knows it’s not a bat

theeWeeBabySeamus

LOL, a fact I should have realized.
/brain cramp on my part.

King Hippo

looks like L’Orange will luck into JUST holding the fuck on.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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King Hippo

fucking Syracuse, man

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hope scotchnaut ain’t missing this one. Will be happy for him if they hold on.

King Hippo

hope he just sees the score if they win, these last 3 minutes been fugly

theeWeeBabySeamus

Ugly doesn’t begin to describe it.
I love Vitale saying the refs need to break the rules for Duke (I’m paraphrasing…but that was his meaning).

King Hippo

oh, the Vitale games are ALWAYS on mute for my cracker ass

theeWeeBabySeamus

I had it turned way down most of the game. Turned it up a little the last couple minutes. In the last 12.9 when ‘Cuse had fouls to burn, after they fouled the 2nd time, Vitale said words to the effect of “The officials need to put a stop to this”.
Or something like that.

King Hippo

TYPICAL. It would be “BRILLIANT coaching move BABEEEE!!!!” if the shoe were on the other foot.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

You fellas are going to burn tomorrow night.

BURN

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King Hippo

well…DUH. Bad team is bad!

theeWeeBabySeamus

You don’t scare us. We’ve lost to worse teams that Pitt. Lots of ’em. With regularity.

/we gott dis

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

How the hell the Panthers got good is beyond me. Also Braden Holtby all of a sudden got good. That needs to stop.

King Hippo

They fired Marty Fucking Hurney

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Jagr.

Good thing the Pens low-balled him a couple years ago.

Dude was obviously finished.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Pretty sure the answer is Cam Newton.

Beerguyrob

Maybe in Wichita.

American Pie Story
American Pie Story

y’know guys i was expecting a much worse Ballghaziversary commemoration across the news cycles today

King Hippo

saw this the other day and thought of your journey through unworthy Humps:

http://www.theonion.com/article/woman-feels-shes-finally-ready-start-receiving-uns-52143

King Hippo

I’m eating plain white rice with kosher salt for dinner. Try not to be too jelly.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I hope you’ve got some sort of gastrointestinal distress.
Otherwise….duuuuude.

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Damn.

I went full-on carbonara: bacon, egg, Parm cheese and peas.

King Hippo

the alpha and the omega of dinner choices!

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons
Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

Now you’ve done it. You put a picture of that screaming motherfucker Joe Walsh and I’m gonna rant.

This shitburger moved into the Congressional district where I grew up to ride the “Oh God A Black Man Is In the White House” wave of hysteria into Congress where he became a useless obstinate Tea Party fuckhead who spend more time on Fox News than he did making any sort of laws. He accused Obama of bankrupting the country while voting against debt ceiling increases. He screamed about fiscal responsibility despite having little personally (hello unpaid child support!) and cussed out a constituent who dared to suggest the financial crisis was caused by banks. Oh, and there’s no medical need for an abortion ever! Fortunately, Illinois gerrymandered the fucker into facing off against a female amputee Iraqi War veteran whom he was eager to say wasn’t a true hero. Despite being fueled by Super PAC money, he still got his ass handed to him in the 2012 election after which he slithered off to AM talk radio where he could scream racial slurs until he was suspended,

Fuck this guy.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

Oh, and the best part is this shithead wasn’t a social conservative the first couple times he ran for the General Assembly. But after Obama awakened his inner racist, (he said Obama was mostly elected due to white guilt) he lost his fucking mind and went all stubborn, screaming, attention-whore Tea Party crazy.

King Hippo

he’s a true pigfucker if ever there was one.

litre_cola

Fuck, the Iggles hire Reich then hire Schwartz. It is going to be real uncomfortable when Reich calls the game plan for week 12 “The Final Solution”.

Old School Zero

Nah, Reich is a terrible OC, he’ll insist on marching up the middle right into the Soviet winter via shotgun draw plays only.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

You can never run effectively during the Rasputitsa!

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Doktor Zymm

Did you see that thing over New Years where some contract employee had the NY Times Square Ball’s Twitter account tweet out #BallLivesMatter and got in all kinds of shit?

King Hippo

that would really be better for Testicular Cancer Awareness ,, smgdh

theeWeeBabySeamus

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theeWeeBabySeamus

You’re a beautiful man, Jim.
Please remove your erection from my hip, Mike.
http://rushthecourt.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/boeheim-coach-k.jpg

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

And here’s Jon Chait to remind us all that the left has its own unique propensity for assholism:

http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2016/01/case-against-bernie-sanders.html#

King Hippo

some days I feel like the only muthafucka in the world who is finally ready for HillyBob ,, smh

theeWeeBabySeamus

I don’t trust any of ’em on either side not to fuck things up even worser.
I do distrust her the least probably.
How’s that for a ringing endorsement?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Is it really real this time or are you just screwing with me again?