Before you do anything, click play on this video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Qqd6T_A9LY
And now you know what the hell they are saying when you hear that song on Fox all day today. The pre-game show starts at 11 AM Pacific with kickoff around 11:45. As part of the fun, we get a special pre-game kickoff ceremony that Fox probably won’t broadcast, but which you may find on the Spanish broadcast which, interestingly enough, is on ESPN Deportes and NOT Fox Deportes. That’s PK weird. Anyway, here is last year’s show, for your viewing pleasure:
BTW, the pre-game show starts at 10 AM on ESPN Deportes, not 11 like Fox so maybe they will show more of the ceremony.
As for some actual game analysis, since I am the resident La Liga watcher/booster around these parts, King Hippo suggested I do the preview for the game since both teams are in La Liga and finished behind Barcelona.
This year, The Madrid Derby was tied 1-1 when it was held in the Vicente Calderón, Atlético’s home ground, while Atlético won the game held at the Santiago Bernabeu, Real’s home ground by a score of 1-0. The game, in recent years, has been a study in a clash of styles.
Atlético tries to win by playing extremely tough defense, forcing mistakes, and killing teams on the counter-attack. Once they get a goal up, they can pretty much go on lockdown mode and end up winning by two or more as teams try everything in their power to score and leave themselves open at the back.
Real, on the other hand, are a team of superstars that focus more on attacking via their formidable group of forwards which includes Cristiano Ronaldo, Karim Benzema, and Gareth Bale, among others. Therein lies the problem for Real Madrid. They have too many stars that demand playing time and there are only 11 men on the field at any one time. This problem has done in all previous coaches in the last few years including soon-to-be ManU coach Mourinho.
Former Real, French National Team, and head-butting superstar Zinedine Zidane has taken over the coaching duties and, for now, it looks like he’s found the magic formula. Real look to be playing the best they have all season.
The big story-line is that this is a rematch of the 2014 Champions League Final in which Atlético had a 1-0 lead deep into injury time at the end of the game only for Real to tie it up and then eventually score three (!) in extra time to win 4-1. The styles of play then were pretty much the same as now. Atlético could not hold on to their one-goal lead (as is their preference) that time. What makes them think they can do it this time?
I think they have learned their lesson and will be more aggressive in seeking a second goal, should they score first again. The story of this game will be written with the first goal. Whoever scores it will win.
BTW, the stadiums are only roughly 4 miles apart. That should make for a very interesting Saturday in Madrid. I suggest you go to your local churreria and stock up on these for the game:
That way, no matter which team wins, you will be the ultimate winner. Enjoy the game!
Moar Doutzen
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-eDINMhkhoCk/TkYyufWTNaI/AAAAAAAACVw/vtzF4TyGMss/s1600/doutzen_kroes+wallpaper.jpg
Reply test (with release)
Good morning / afternoon folks.
One more week of parent teacher interviews hell left and then I can breathe. Thank God.
It’s frightening just to see how many parents are sociopaths who take zero responsibility for their children.
Ah yes…because a bloated, disappointing blockbuster superhero film matches up just perfectly to the Champion’s League Final…
Miraculously, the Asian at the wheel was unharmed.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjkkjH0GnfY
A real life version of the Mexico/Paraguay Simpsons game is on tonight!!
@balls…
http://www.thehealthygamer.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/sterling-archer-meme-generator-just-the-tip-10e54b.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/REHDYEn.gif
@tWBS , that picture cracks me up for some reason. So much going on there…
@balls…LMFAO.
UR nucking futs.
@tWBS:
Thanks! Here is something theme-appropriate that the ladies or gay men might enjoy:
http://www.andrewchristian.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/u/n/uncupped_5__2.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/71uResw.jpg
Here Balls, have some Doutzen…
http://myfabulousstyle.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/doutzen-victoria-secret-74.jpg
Fox Fact of the Match!
Cristiano Ronaldo plays soccer…or “football” which is what they call soccer in Europe.
So this is the first result when you GIS “European hairy bush”:
http://cdn2.arkive.org/media/B3/B3719AFF-3211-483B-B1FA-528051AE0887/Presentation.Large/Tai-hairy-bush-viper.jpg
“Its amazing here in the stadium Chip! Literally tens of thousands of unemployed Europeans have stormed the stadium and the surrounding area in anticipation. You can literally taste the excitement. Its a tangy, pungent taste”
“Thank you for that report and back to the Fox Studios where former crappy US players will spend the next 10 minutes explaining simple concepts to the audience of 12 people nationally who are currently watching”
Hey, I can’t reply, but that really funny thing you said down there? No, the other thing. No, the other thing. Yeah, that’s the one.
Yeah, that was really funny.
Don’t have to teach five hours of lessons this weekend, which means I’m actually wearing shorts. They’re comfy and easy to wear! How goes it?
Bad. The reply button is borked.
I think I just got the trots from the mere mention of said Frito pie. Even though it would be delicioso. Damn my 42-year old digestive system.
My previous comment just led me to thinking: Why the fuck doesn’t Tommy’s offer a Frito Pie?!? That’s just begging to be sold!
Rikki, if you want Frito Pie without paying outrageous prices (God, I’m dreading hearing how expensive that breakfast place is!), here is what you do:
1) Go to 7-11 and buy bag of Fritos.
2) Go to Tommy”s and buy bowl of chili.
3) Pour chili over Fritos
4) Profit
Tell me how that turns out.
@JustStopDude – Either and/or both?
:large
Is the website acting weird…or am I still drunk?….
Morning..folks…
Jesus Christ the hangover…
Lots of sports this weekend…lots…of…someone…finish…this…………
RTD”s comment got me thinking of this:
@RTD – All you had to say was Hollywood Blvd…
This is the place that my wife is pitching for breakfast this morning. There is literally not a single thing about this place’s website that does not loudly scream “hipster”.
https://www.myhomestate.com/
Wait forty-five minutes for some breakfast tacos? No thanks.
Is it a mobile thing? I’m on my phone and all I get is a limp useless teal thing.
Holy shit! Now I know how it feels to be a Jaguar!
HOW THE HELL DOES RTD HAVE THE POWER TO REPLY? !?
@HRHLR – /points finger gunz towards the right.
@Sill – It could only be the Jets.
Apparently, there was a Word Press update that fucked everything up. Fearless Leader is working on it but he’s also been drinking so this may take a while…
Wow.
Jets gon’ Jet.
http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/id/15777284/new-york-jets-offering-ryan-fitzpatrick-12-million-first-year
WHO DOES THE REPLY BUTTON WORK FOR?
MASTER BLAS—RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY
Which one of you whoremongers broke the reply feature?
@King Hippo – I don’t understand why Fox Soccer Plus thinks the Collingwood-Western clash is more worthy of TV time.
To the tablet!
And since we has several hours to kill – Balls, why is it that the epic Geelong/Carlton fixture ain’t on teevee in the USA?
This is where I’ll be heading soon:
http://amarachocolate.com/churros/
@Unsurprised, please feel free to “dirty” up this thread with pictures of beautiful women (and/or men for that matter, we appreciate beauty in all its forms). That should help take our minds off the fact we have to go back to this way of replying.
That song reminded me of being on a yacht and you reminded me I haven’t seen this weeks archer.
Great. I killed the thread.
Oh. I tossed up something in last night’s thread so as not to dirty up this one.
Well, I got SM off my back. Perkins – I’m still trying to figure that one out. All told, I get paid on Tuesday but until then I am just lucky I have this bag of frozen stir fry vegetables in my freezer.
Meanwhile, I just went back and noticed that Charlotte McKinney photo. Jesus, Moose. Thanks.
Spanish/Euro culture – GOD BLESS a nation built around afternoon naps and really strong fucking coffee. I could live there. See also, their womenfolk.
Go……Atletico! Because they is not Real Madrid and not coached by that bellend Zidane.
Excellent writeup, yo.
If’n they do win, they will have taken down, in order: Barca, Bayern, Real Madrid. THAT’S GOOD LESSER FOOTY HUSTLE!!
Well, Balls, this is an interesting reply problem. Nice write up, doll. Expect nothing like this for Poland in three days.
@Unsurprised–you earned churros!
@HRHLR, I’m disappointed in myself that I didn’t include that gif in the post. Nice!
@Don T, I too want Atléti to win, but I’m worried. Real got lucky with the draw, but they have steadily improved with Zidane. The same thing happens every time they switch coaches: The players buy in for a bit, play great, and then the wave crests, there is discontent, the players stop playing well, and the coach gets fired. Rinse and repeat. The problem is that they are at the top of the wave right now.
Vamos Atléti!
Atlético all the way man! Argentinian coach, Uruguay’s central defense, two of the prettiest men ever as fast or poaching forwards, and they all press and hit. Real just cakewalked to the final; Wolfsburg gave them a scare and that gun-shy City team too. Atleti eliminated La Liga Champion and the Bundesliga Champion. God I hope Real loses. At least a couple of teeth.
ESPNDeportes: yes. Can’t beat that color. Everything is complicated: a clumsy pass, a poor tackle, a lazy save–complicado, complicado, complicado. They’re informative, but the best is when they go “Foul? In my town, that wasn’t called”, and they go off on that while the stretcher is out on the field.
Loved the preview.
@Unsurprised, the Spanish/Euro sense of time is SO much different than ours! Dinner at 10 PM, get to the club at 1 or 2. It’s amazing.
Living in LA where everything closes at 1:30, it was a gigantic shock when I came back from Europe the first time I went there.
I remember being in Madrid and getting churros con chocolate at seven am after partying and now it’s 4:34 am and I’m waiting until five so I can call Sallie fucking Mae and beg them to show mercy on my quarter million plus loan balance.
I hate being an adult.