Your “Merciful Heaven, It’s A Game 7!” Wednesday Night Open Thread

NFL News:

  • Norv news! Norv Turner resigned from the Vikings this morning. No reason has officially been given, so speculate away!
  • Wade Phillips is back at work.
  • The PA may be pushing the NFL to tolerate Mary Jane as an alternative to chemical painkillers, especially if/once Proposition 64 passes in California,
    • There are marijuana ballot initiatives in other NFL-friendly states like Arizona, Florida, Massachusetts & Nevada.
      •  Adding in Colorado & Washington, that’s 6 states with (currently) 10 franchises.
    • If they look to licence official suppliers, they don’t need to go further than Ricky Williams, blunt brother #1.
  • It’ll be the Nick Foles show for the Chiefs versus the Jaguras this week, as Alex Smith’s 13 concussions last Sunday will have him on the sidelines.
  • Seriously, Tom Brady – shut the fuck up!
  • Should have shut up sooner? Brian Baldinger, who has been suspended by NFL Network for 6 months for advocating the Eagles put a bounty on Ezekiel Elliott

    He swears he won't do it again.
    He swears he won’t do it again. Scout’s honor.

There’s nothing more fun, or nerve-wracking, than a Game 7 for the championship. (Or, y’know, the Super Bowl.) Add in whatever historical factoids that give extra weight/incentive to a team and a fanbase, and you’ve got instant ratings.

I’ve been fortunate enough to have been to  three NFC Championship games and one NHL Stanley Cup Game 7 in my lifetime. The NFC championships were:

  • 2007 – Giants at Green Bay
  • 2013 – Niners at Seahawks
  • 2014 – Packers at Seahawks

Each one was fantastic in their own way. Giants-Packers was going to be on “the frozen tundra”. I spent the night before trying to drink Titletown Brewing dry. The game ended the way most Favre seasons did – with an interception leading to the other team’s winning field goal, followed by 6 months of retirement rumours.

Plus, I got to see a guy wearing a deer.

Having grown up a Packers fan – yes, I have one of those shares; the Seahawks didn’t exist until 1976 – it was bittersweet, because I thrilled at the fact of going to my first Lambeau game but cheated that I wasn’t rewarded for having spent all that money to get there. I’d like to think it would’ve felt the same had I lived there.

The Niners-Seahawks was great from both a season ticket-holder perspective and a fan’s perspective. Having gotten my season’s tickets in 2010, I hadn’t been there for long, but had been there for the whole Pete Carroll era, and it seemed like the culmination of an actual plan, something fans rarely see work through to fruition. My wife didn’t cotton to all the “FUCK THE NINERS!” yells and chants, but the celebration at the end was a sports feeling I’d never had.

She's got a valid opinion on this as well.
She’s got a valid opinion on this as well.

The 2014 game, therefore, was full of mixed emotions: Packers fan but Seahawks season ticket-holder. It was one of those situations where I had two dogs in the fight, so I couldn’t lose. But a significant part of my sports fandom wanted a different outcome, even though Mike McCarthy’s goal-line decision-making in that game eerily foreshadowed the circumstances of Super Bowl 49.

The 2011 Stanley Cup Game 7 had the same circumstance. Growing up as a kid, and Atom-level hockey player, I wanted to be a Bruin, either Bobby Orr or Gerry Cheevers. I had their cards, posters and knock-off jerseys. I suffered them losing to the Habs and the Oilers, and then losing Ray Bourque to the Avs, so he could finally win one. I know the Red Sox had a longer drought, but as I’ve often said – I don’t give a crap about the Red Sox.

I grew up in Vancouver. The Canucks have been a consistently bad franchise for most of their 46 years, so the few triumphs really stick out in people’s minds. (And, unfortunately, turn casual fans into complete assholes – Patriots fans, but without any trophies.) I became a Bruins fan partly because my younger hockey-playing self needed a hero, and there wasn’t one locally. Both the 1982 and 1994 Cup Finals teams were unexpected surprises, which made cheering for them fun. The 2011 team was expected to make the Finals, so that was different.

Once again, the 2011 Game 7 was a case of having two dogs in the fight.

I got what I wanted, and took its picture too.

Given that the youngest curse ending tonight is 78 years, expect lots of interviews with old people just before the meteor hits.

“CUBS WIN! CUBS WIN!…Ahh, shit…”

Tonight’s sports:

  • MLB: Game 7 – Chicago at Cleveland – 8:00 | FOX/Sportsnet
  • College Football: Toledo at Akron – 7:30 PM | ESPN2
  • NBA Basketball:
    • Raptors at Wizards – 7:00 | TSN
    • Bulls at Celtics – 8:00 PM | ESPN
    • Thunder at Clippers – 10:30 PM | ESPN/TSN
  • NHL Hockey:
    • Canucks at Canadiens – 7:30 | Sportsnet1/360
    • Red Wings at Flyers – 8:00 PM | NBCSN
    • Penguins at Ducks – 10:30 | Sportsnet1/360

I have friends who support both teams, so I want a good game. DON’T BE A BLOWOUT!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Wooooooo!

Doktor Zymm

oh, that’s a beaut line drive

Doktor Zymm

Every audience shot they show of a Cubs fan erodes my desire to see the Cubs win. There are lots of good Cubs fans. Not great as a group.

Brick Meathook

Headline:

CUBS AND INDIANS STILL 6-6
PITCHERS AND CATCHERS REPORT FOR SPRING TRAINING

Old School Zero

FASTER ZOBRIST! KILL KILL!

Old School Zero

YEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Horatio Cornblower

GREAT BASE RUNNING!

Yes indeed. Why, who would have thought to go back to 1B and tag up on a ball that was either leaving the park or getting caught on the warning track, besides EVERY PROFESSIONAL BASEBALL PLAYER EVER!?

Redshirt

Why do I have a feeling the Cubs are going to score 10 runs only to give up 10 runs in the bottom half of this inning?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

You shut your whore mouth

Doktor Zymm

Psychologically, it’s gotta be better to go second yes? And we all know how guys love scoring in the bottom

ThePirateSloth

My roomie keeps asking me how Joe Buck is still calling games when even his home town hates his announcing.

I’ve finally decided that it’s because we all touch ourselves every night and the gods are punishing us.

Doktor Zymm

One ball, one strike, one beer

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Gonna regret this pinch runner in the top of the 14th

Brocky

Lol, my group at the bar has essentially become the self appointed care taker of this poor 60 year old guy falling asleep.fell out of his chair, we got him into a booth.

He’s not drunk he’s just tired

litre_cola

I use that excuse all the time, but I am 40.

Redshirt
blackroseMD1

I wonder how drunk Wade Boggs was by the end of that game. If the over/under is at 55 beers, I’m taking the over.

Senor Weaselo

It’s only fitting.

blackroseMD1

Alex Rodriguez looks smaller. That’s weird.

Horatio Cornblower

Wonder how that happened?

/is actually really sure how that happened

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ok, I’ve switched from beer to booze. Made myself a Remember the Maine. I need to settle in for a long night.

Redshirt

I’m calling it. Cubs forfeit in the 43rd inning when they cannot field nine players.

blackroseMD1

I’m sticking with my meteor strike in the top of the 26th prediction from last night.

Doktor Zymm

There should be a pitch (or a football play) called the Mojo. Cause then this could be played whenever it don’t work.

Redshirt

I’m glad Pete Rose is on TV, but it reminds me that all he had to do was say “I did it. I have a problem. I need help.” and he would’ve been back managing the Reds by ’91.

Why is Pete Rose dress liked Eddie Munster?

Spur

This game is insane, can’t wait for the next 9 innings.

Spur

You know Pete Rose has no pants on.

Redshirt

If I’m Chapman, I’m currently strangling the manager for using me for a meaningless Game 6 appearance so I would be out of gas for the most important appearance in my life.

“¡Devuélveme mi juventud! ¡Devuélveme mi infancia!”

nomonkeyfun

He would only strangle Josephine Madden

Horatio Cornblower

A win or else game isn’t meaningless. That said, the 9th inning of a game where you have a 7 run lead is pretty goddamn meaningless for your starter.

Brick Meathook

This just proves the joke that neither of these teams is gonna win.

Duchess

Pete Rose looks like a damn goblin now.

Doktor Zymm

I remember being a kid and hearing ladies who were past puberty talking about how Brady Anderson had a great ass. I wonder if that was true? I bet I can find out on the Internet.

Senor Weaselo

Yes, but do remember the steroids.

Doktor Zymm

I had switched from baseball to a brief basketball stint and then on to hockey by the time all that came up. By the time I stopped thinking boys were gross, I had kinda forgotten the whole thing and kinda missed all the steroid stuff. Now it’s more baseball nostalgia for me than anything else.

Brocky

comment image

Gratliff

All I can think of is that KSK post where he travels back in time to meet a young Tommy From Quinzee and is met with “THE FUCK IS A PAHTRIOT!?”

Spur

Which team gets a break from this delay?

Gratliff

George Carlin is cackling from the grave.

Horatio Cornblower

2nd Unpopular Opinion of the Night: George Carlin wasn’t funny for years and was little more than an angry, bitter SOB during that time.

Paid good money to see him live 10-12 years ago and holy shit, it was just awful.

Gratliff

I thought the Phillies getting rained out halfway through the clinching game was brutal. Refs are lucky there’s not a World War Z situation taking place.

Horatio Cornblower

Yet

It’s doubly sad that baseball is declared illegal effective midnight EST tonight…

Old School Zero

Here’s something to drown out Joe Buck:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eE6QzDrT_x8

WCS

This is just more evidence God doesn’t want either team to win.

Doktor Zymm

If it does pick back up tomorrow or later….they still can’t pull back in a pitcher they already played? Or how does that work? These are the rules I don’t know.

Redshirt

Nope. All players who were entered into the game and subbed out are disqualified from playing. They can remain in the dugout and act as a coach, but they cannot reenter into a playing or batting position.

Horatio Cornblower

What Redshirt said. Except the coaching part. They actually can only just sit there and chew tobacco, setting a fine example for our youth.

http://gomakemeasandwich.files.wordpress.com/2014/12/lovejoy-think-of-the-children-16nov131.jpg

blackroseMD1

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Redshirt

“But, Dad! You promised Noah and his family You would never flood everyone again!”
“It’ll just rain lightly, Son. Just enough to keep Chicago OR Cleveland from winning.”

Duchess

We may have a new president before this game ends.

LemonJello

A RAIN DELAY? Are you fucking serious. Welp, I’m done. Off to bed folks. I’ll see how this ended in the morning.

http://replygif.net/i/420.gif

Doktor Zymm

Rain delay + extra innings? FUCK NO. I will drink this drink. I will enjoy this drink. I’ve gone to bed on election night not knowing who was president. I can go to bed tonight not knowing who wins.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

The fans are gonna wake you up either way when it does end

ballsofsteelandfury

If this game ends at 3 AM Eastern it will be the greatest game in the history of the world!

Senor Weaselo

This rain delay will last 40 days and 40 nights, calling it now.

Old School Zero

This is insane.

Horatio Cornblower

THIS WEATHER DELAY I CALL IT PENN STATE BECAUSE SOMETHING BLOWING THROUGH SANDUSKY IS FUCKING UP A KID’S GAME!!!

Brocky

comment image

This is a strangely endearing game.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

LMFAO

Duchess

RAIN DELAY WTF THEY REALLY DONT WANT EITHER TEAM TO WIN

Spur

LOL FUCKING RAIN.

Gratliff

Slip and slide series!

Redshirt

Series tied! 3-3-1! No one wins!

WCS

That would be an appropriate ending for a Cubs-Indians World Series.

Horatio Cornblower

Participation ribbons for everyone!

Senor Weaselo

The last tied WS game was 1922… you know, when there weren’t lights so the game got called when it was dark.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

You gotta be fucking kidding me