It was a scorcher in VanCity today. Sure – 28 degrees Celsius isn’t a lot to people south of the 49th, but for here it’s damned unpleasant when the wind isn’t blowing. We are in the middle of that window Wakezilla mentioned where it’s awful for aboot four weeks, when everyone considers buying an air conditioner but then chooses not to because “what am I going to do with it the other 11 months?” It’s how you can tell many of us have Scottish heritage. Anyway, they’re talking an extended period of 30+ degrees along the coast, which will do nothing for our tempers, and will only exacerbate the fire season in the interior.
I spent my Sunday afternoon selling beer at a stadium filled with people instead wanting $2 root beer floats (for charity) & trying to dump their empty ice cream cups onto my tray, like I’m their fucking waiter. IT’S “BEERGUY”, NOT “JANITORGUY”, BIG SPENDER!
I hope you had a pleasanter day.
Tonight’s sports:
- MLB:
- Giants at Dodgers – 8:00PM | ESPN / TSN2
- Soccer: women
- USA vs. Brazil – 8:00PM | ESPN2
The relative paucity of sports now will only wane as news filters out of all camps & we head toward Thursday’s Hall of Fame Game, and possibly the first gameday Open Thread of the 2017 season. Bart, do you have an opinion on this course of action?
Oh, two more things about GoT
Bran is a dick.
I’ve been spoiled recently by too much lazy storytelling and had a fleeting thought that something in the tomes Sam has to copy might prove useful. I know better, but eh.
More of a creep… like you looked so pretty on the day you got raped
[spoiler title=”GoT “] Testing testing
#BadAtThis
There is no reason for me seeing this other than the window was open on my second monitor and I saw the movement. Try 1 on that failed.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u7aDstrDMf0
Why are we not best friends IRL?
Because I’m an asshole who runs everyone off who ever tried to love him?
That describes half of DFO’s users.
FWIW, someone asked me today what sort of woman I was looking for.
I quickly pointed out that I’m NOT looking for a woman, so don’t even think about it.
But this is the song which came to mind.
…But were they cute?
Never got that far.
I don’t do fix ups anymore.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qVPNONdF58
Mr Ayo doesn’t know it yet, but he’s potentially screwed himself out of lifetime free lodgings in Venice Beach tonight….maybe.
LMFAO.
(just kidding mayonnaise boy…I’ll always love you even if you are wrong on this one)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tXhmwMdUKfA
As a former junior high drummer, we can agree to disagree.
I live with someone that can’t hear “100” music right now and I have great speakers. I enjoy good music. Keep going
Remember when Dave Grohl used to be a drummer?
Yeah, me neither.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHo5xNS9bYI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCr_ZttR-R4
Whoa. The American Idiot lyrics fit this one too!
LOL.
You suck.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=okthJIVbi6g
Love this one.
That set of three cuts, Good Life, Scorcho, and Pink Triangle are so apt for my life right now.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gjy3XbxMW1A
R&M post-credit stinger money scene. https://gfycat.com/ExemplaryExaltedIberianlynx
Some Green Day you’ve probably never heard.
While still in Arizona and on the light rail, me practicing drumming this one almost got me laid by a really hot young drummer (female, shut up) with pink hair. No shit….when this album first came out and I was absently practicing it, she recognized it and we connected. Sadly, she was too young for me, but still it was fun. Her little cover band wasn’t terrible tho.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J0ArZU2AfMs
Actually, it turns out once you’ve heard one Green Day song, you’ve heard them all.
Although the lyrics are different.
Seriously, listen to American Idiot after this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ee_uujKuJMI
I disagree. But then again, most songs I gravitate towards are due to the drums.
Also, Tre Cool says fuck you. 😉
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8dh9gDzmz8
3 different chords are hard. I love Green Day
IT’S FOUR GODDAMMIT!!!!!!
I expected Green Day. I will accept Audioslave
Give me time
(you know me too well)
Love this song and have like 30 stories I will tell you later
BOOOOOOOO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WC5FdFlUcl0
FWIW….if I do manage to negotiate a deal, you’ll all have free lodgings in Venice Beach whenever you like.
(don’t get excited yet, it’s still a LOOOOOONNNGGGG way from happening)
((but I’m hopeful))
Dear Lord, I just spent an hour and a half writing something for work I was supposed to do like two weeks ago. Still not done but more productive than I’ve been in the office. Wish i could celebrate with some whisky but I am spent.
Chalk this one up as a win vs. Procrastination (that bastard).
OK MTWV, maybe this is more what you’d expect out of me….
I’ve spent the better part of my years on this planet with a live and let live attitude. All it’s ever gotten me was stress and complications. So fuck the world and everyone in it (many of whom were put on notice this week, fwiw…including my next door neighbor whom I’ve tolerated her bullshit for far too long….but tonight she might have finally learned I’m not fucking around anymore).
Yep, this sounds like me….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6D9vAItORgE
By the way, you didn’t get flooded with relatives after the blackout evacs I hope?
I get flooded with dumbass redneck relatives regularly. Not even sure I’d know the difference anymore.
But now that a particular old piece o’ shit racist fuck has died (two days ago) I’m one step closer to my SoCal retirement plan.
You guys thought I was trying to be funny. I wasn’t. I literally have no fucks left to give.
You can see my future home in this vid.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RtBbinpK5XI
And I mean specifically….you can see the building I hope to buy and retire in as a beach front flop house.
I am legally obligated to say “Sorry for your loss” and not play a particular song from Wizard of Oz.
No loss. And don’t be sorry. I’m not.
Fucker needed to die a decade ago.
Plus now I don’t have to figure out a way to smother him with a pillow.
NO, I am not joking.
Meanwhile, I am legally obligated to say that you and the world are better off with that racist dead and I’d be happy to help do anything you need to move on from this bullshit.
Like when I eventually chopper in to rescue MTWV from Wisconsin.
I’m always right.
You have a king sized bed I never sleep in to hang out in. You are welcome
Aim for the Green Bay stadium, then drive 25 miles south. ill probably be there
Glad that specific problem cleared up for you.
I will love you anyway. I found a person that doesn’t care. Still gonna harass you.
Well, shit….I goddamned hope so.
😛
I skipped your friends for this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=auLBLk4ibAk
GnR cover? BOO THIS MAN!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7aGAIWe3uE
Normally I’d have leaned to the original, admittedly.
But I’m “Axel Rose level” pissed off tonight.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8Fedfg8B50
Still gotta go with the original here
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VVOFibwVMw0
Another Wild Arms fan?!?
[Grabs Gratliff by the collar]
What else have you been keeping from me?!
Can anyone give me a song? Ignore my last 2 and pick something
A youtube link from your Toni Braxton.
Also one of my favs…..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQgd6MccwZc
In no way what I expected. That said keep going
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EeC_nDFusoY
My brother sent me clips of him so many times before the internet had filters.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrXZ2D5nqNA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bV-hSgL1R74
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FT-1bCoS6c
I honestly nave no excuse for this. Thought of it. Fuck you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2Rch6WvPJE
No one needs an excuse for this one. Great tune.
Great. I just found out there’s a post-credits scene in tonight’s Rick & Morty.
Well done Steve Pearce.
The day the O’s decided not to re-sign you, I was sad.
But good for you, dude….even if you are a stinkn’ Blue Jay now.
Their mom must be exhausted.
Spent 3 hours at a WWE show tonight listening to entirely too many USA chants, including one while a Japanese and Indian wrestler were squaring off, and one where they were chanting at the heel because they thought he was foreign while the guy they were cheering for actually is. The show ended with John Cena beating up a foreigner for 10 minutes. Holy shit, jingoism.
Rick and Morty is trash TV. Don’t waste your time folks.
I thought I liked you.
How could you blaspheme this way?
You sound like every friend of mine.
YOU ARE WORSHIPING A FALSE GOD!
Yeah, me “worshiping” a so-called “god”. Yep, totally sounds like me.
(nuh uh)
The show makes me laugh, don’t take this from me dammit!!!!!!! I have so little to look forward to as it is!!!!!
😉
Hey man, at least you’ve got Sexy Friday posts to look forward too. It’s not like anyone could possibly complain about you posting beautiful women amidst funny anecdotes, right?
LOL
You’re a damned smartass. Something I can respect, actually.
(no, no drive by complaints this week so far….amazing how quiet people get when they get threatened with exposure)
So you’ll do better this week?
Define “better”.
<3
I’ll let you know Friday.
Fuck em. If I know I don’t like someone’s column, I don’t click on it. It’s not a difficult concept. The entire world doesn’t exist to cater to your tastes. Let em click somewhere else if it doesn’t suit them.
Don’t get me wrong, if you have something constructive to offer, by all means say something, but if you just want to complain, then fuck off.
Yup.
THIS MR. AYO, I CALL HIM JONATHAN EDWARDS BECAUSE HE IS CALLING US SINNERS IN THE HANDS OF AN ANGRY GOD!
Tough, but fair
Yeah, well.
Loser …
Watching the stream of R&M that fell off the back of this truck
It was no Rickshank Rickdemption, but hey, Joel McHale!
I have something to look forward too. Joel McHale on Rick and Morty
Just got home from Atomic Blonde. It is worth matinee pricing.
I assume Emilia Clarke was wearing heels or something, but it seems like Kit Harrington is really short.
I honestly looked it up. She is 5’2″, he is 5’8″. Still short but actually the average even if it seems short
Weird. He seems tiny.
Yeah, but he knows how to use it.
“He reminds me of a young me”.
-Drew Rosenhaus on Euron Greyjoy
Neat. Now I have two series to follow for a few weeks.
We’ve all seen this, right?
https://twitter.com/JustinRoiland/status/891521911460470784
NO.
BUT, YES!
This is why everyone does everything. That’s just describing the free market.
UM Game of Thrones… damn
Will Olenna Tyrell ever be… Avenged?
Cersei is exactly stupid enough to have that come back and bite Jaime in the dick. It won’t, but it’d be funnier if it did.
I love Lena Headey, but I could have gone for like 14 less minutes of that story. I am basing this on the unscientific guess she was on screen for 15 minutes.
“Fewer”
– Stannis
But, tits. Specifically, these tits. And some ass.
I am like 85% certain she went body double again. Check 300 to see actually her naked.
Why must you kill my boner?
Vengeance is a dish best served milked. God that was long. But crazy intense.
Damnit, why did I crack this growler? Now I have to finish it before I leave for a week tomorrow or it’ll go bad. But I have a 6:30am flight…
[Shoulder flies open]
Nah, drink it. You’ll be fiiiine. And stay up for the new Rick and Morty!
[Other shoulder flies open]
BURN THE HERETICS TO THE GROUND! MAKE THE OCEANS RUN RED WITH THEIR BLOOD! DEFILE THEIR REMAINS UNTIL NOTHING IS LEFT!
[Sighs and gets another glass]
(two hours and several shots later)
“WE’RE GOING STREAKING!!!”
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Figurines kill for those cheekbones.
Fat-faced Boltman gets me every time.
The first brewery that introduced the smaller growler was the first to care about you showing up for work the next morning reasonably sober.
Yeah, but anything less than 32oz is really just admission of weakness.
I really wish I kept one of the three my roommates left behind at the old house. I never used them in two years, though, which is just something else to put in the list of dumb shit that is my life.
Is this where I go to say “fuck the world and everyone in it”…?
No?
Oh well.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6ZtHrWiSAk
No, new Rick and Morty’s on in 45 minutes. Then you can say it!
I was watching NFLN and I noticed the Patriots changed their colors from blue and red to black and gold, and also replaced the Elvis Patriot decal with a circular decal with three different colored astroids on them, but someone messed up because the decals were only on one side and…
Wait, that wasn’t the Patriots? There are other teams in in the NFL besides the Patriots. Holy crap! Does ESPN know?
No
Oh, hey Redshirt! Can I put you down for writing the Bengals preview on 8/15? I can email you later in the week with more info.
Sure. Just send me directions on how to do it and how long it has to be.
It won’t be fancy because I don’t know how to write a HTML Internet page. It was most likely be an essay that quickly devolves into a rambling incoherent mess.
Longer than a Favre is the only ask. And rambling messes are our forte!
Love it when I go to a taproom, decide to leave because I’m definitely drunk, and have the bartender give me a double IPA “for the road.” Jesus dude, I was already going to tip well without this and now my liver hates you.
It was, at least, a delicious beer so I can’t be that angry.
It’s a good problem to have, especially since I know you weren’t driving.
In Baltimore, I went to a cocktail bar and planned on having two drinks and going back to my hotel.
Instead some extremely bro bro comes in to watch Game of Thrones (I guess this could happen at this bar) and starts buying shots. I have only the vaguest memory stumbling 40 minutes from Fells Point to my hotel mumbling something about societal injustice under my breath the whole way and probably getting some strange looks.
But I didn’t drive!
The lady friend thinks its weird I don’t have one of those video game machines.
This is something adults are suppose to move on from right? Are the game systems still wood paneled like the Atari 2600?
My missus’ ex was a gamer so she hates it, so I now immerse myself in internets. So you are not weird! Maybe you will get to watch another enthralling film this evening.
I assume my wifi is slow because of Time Machine and also because I’m not alone in streaming (one way or another …) GoT. It better not take 2 hours to download this.
I just missed The Pirate Sloth at the Oregon Brewers Festival.
I feel like this is a metaphor for something. https://gfycat.com/HardtofindSlipperyDassie
Master of All Science: The Rick & Morty version of Frinkiac
I’m currently packing for a trip to the North East for work all of next week. I am taking suggestions for movies for the very long flight(s), as well as any key words/phrases to add to my “MASSHOLE BINGO” sheet I’ve been working on.
I also might have a date with some tiny guy in a locker, but you can’t prove it.
Marshawn Lynch is just the best. I am so happy he is playing again, just for interactions with the media and the public. He ain’t care boss.
It is known.
It’d be great if Beast Mode tears the league. From Week 2 on, to be exact.
If he could maybe have an off day in weeks 6 and 17, that would be great too.
/quickly checks Eagles schedule.
Soooooo, Hunter Pence still looks and acts like a howler monkey on crack, huh?
And now he sucks at his job.
He chose the right town, at least.
First blax takes a shot at the Iggles, now you crackin on the Giants, are you guys trying to tell me something?
I mean, I’m not saying that I want every member of the basedball Giants to die in a horrible runaway trolley accident, but I’m also not not saying it.
LCSS understandable from you beig a Dirt Char…ummm, hmmm Dirt Aztecs fan?
I also went to college up there and saw the fanbase appear overnight in October of 2010.
Dirt Aztecs is acceptable. And seeing as how he will forever be San Diego, Dirt BOLTMEN is also allowed.
Wait:
THE HoF game’s on This Thursday?
praise and glory INDEED!!
T-minus 48 hours until Clutch/Primus. Must not murder coworkers, must not murder coworkers.
So much fun. Hopefully Les wears the pig head when they play Mr Krinkle.
My youngest son is a huge fan of “Hot Ones” and wants to do a hot wing challenge very soon. I told him I was good to go.
/tried “Pain 100%”
//decided to re-write my will
He’s not getting anything anymore is he?
It’s actually been more pleasant (heat and humidity wise) ’round here today than for the past month, maybe two.
And I managed to not kill someone again today. Wooooooooo!!!!!!!!
I would recommend everyone watch the replay of the Collingwood-Adelaide game. That will get you ready for Monday!
Funny, now that I’m on desktop, I CAN see that the little green member icon looks like a buttplug getting ready to go into my avatar. Good times!
I’ve laughed about that multiple times since Moose pointed it out.
Hehehehehe
Nick Riewoldt to retire. Dammit!