Seriously, when I looked at yesterday’s schedule, there was not one game that I was interested in watching. Steelers-Clots wasn’t even available in LA. We were instead given the merde-pourri of Vikings-Redacteds, Cowboys-Falcons, RAMMIT-Texans, and Shitty Clippers-Jaguras. And then on Sunday night, we were given Pats-Broncos? Yeah Right. Now that I think about it, I think he was the only one happy yesterday.
So, to Roger Goodell I say:
My favorite NASCAR driver, Kyle Busch, was already safely in the final four for Homestead, so the Phoenix race held no special appeal and it ended up being a blissful day without sports. It’s a beautiful world out there, folks.
And now we have this rancid cream cheese frosting as the topper of the shitcake that was NFL Week 10: Dolphins at Panthers.
If I wanted to see a cat beaten to submission by a bunch of other cats, I’d go to Woodrocket.com. As it is, we are going to have Cutler struggling to stay upright while the Panthers’ defence dials up blitz after blitz. The Miami D has been quite decent, which means that this may be a low-scoring game in which the outcome is never in doubt. Ugh.
Let’s see, what else is on?
Is Lucifer any good?
What about Supergirl?
Nah, I think we’re better off sticking to the tried and true Monday Night RAW:
If you are actually going to subject yourself to this torture of an NFL game, at least have a drink and raise it to Beerguyrob’s ass. Not literally.
Also, I’m willing to bet you that this gif that Moose posted on Saturday night captivates your attention more than this game will:
Ok, I’ve tried my best to dissuade you from watching. Have at it you addicts!
Hey guys. Sorry that you had to watch the Dolphins tonight.
Wow
Hey guys. how ya doing? I’m doing great… why you ask?
Because after nearly a year and a half of trying, I finally completed my pokemon go Pokedex. Call me nerdy, I just say you’re jealous you don’t have one of these:
For Additional contex:
256 available pokemon-5 region exclusives – 5 unreleased ones = 246
This might as well be in Chinese to me. Congrats though!
I just had a vision of rex ryan playing pokemon go
And you got an Unown too? Fucker.
/Congrats
//Still envious
///But I have a Farfetch’d motherfucker!
dude…. what you do in thailand is your own buisness
yeah but after months of having no luck finding an unown, One spawned less than 10 minutes from my house.
One of the benefits of the China trip was a Farfetch’d spawning at baggage claim in Taiwan during my layover. It was the only one I caught. I later felt obligated to put it in a gym and name it Conway. (After Charlie, not the other one.)
Balls, I regret to inform you that I did not do anything stupid today. Well, tonight. Depending on who you ask, this afternoon was mildly, with Atomic Wings and all, but I was okay. Not great, but okay.
There’s always tomorrow…
Honestly, is there a way in which the feds might seize all of the Trump org’s assets by the end of this?
Hope springs eternal.
“After I had won, everybody was calling me from all over the world. I never knew we had so many countries.”
Too many friends and too rich?
Why does he have his hand cupped in front of his mouth if he’s wearing a helmet?
This is so fake.
Also, why is he saying “Fire!” when everyone is already clearly firing?
I was thinking we could apply the irony to our currant situation….. but we can go with the pedantic…..
If by “current situation” you mean the last 70 years of our history, then you are absolutely correct.
Last 70?
I guess I was going back to Eisenhower interfering with the elections in Central America in the 50s. But I guess you could go back to our interference in the Caribbean in the early 20th century. Or the Spanish American War. Or the coup in Hawaii in 1893. Or the Mexican War in 1840s. Or fuck it, the Peloponnesian Wars.
More like since projectiles have been used against other humans.
Or earlier.
The irony arrived when when survival turned to tribalism.
Clearly there are others in the foreground out of the illustration that are not fucking firing for peace.
War is peace.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V76mtNixdCE
That’s a great clip.
It’s one of the funniest movies ever made, if not the funniest. In my opinion.
Agreed it is up there. I also like it because of a lot of the types of people who hate it.
It’s Senor Koquonfaes!
Hopefully not too over the top for the moderator people.
Pretty sure that is what is actually under the hair.
Context counts for a lot.
After all; Dick Jokes.
Definitely over the line. No doubt the LIBTARD moderators here will allow it to stand though.
A certain somebody hasn’t mastered coloUring within the lines.
One falls on learned habits when in tense situations that do not seem logical on the surface unless one thinks a bit deeper.
I hope Brad Paisley goes all Bluto on Peyton soon.
I’d like to see the fight where they both die at the exact moment when each of them thinks they have the upper hand.
Silk is my favorite thing that comes out of an animal butt
I got nuthin’…
You’ve rendered me speakless with that one.
We like buffalo poop.
—Cold Plains Indians
I see you’ve never tried ….. crocodile turds.
You see, because of the expression “crocodile tears”……
Imma invent a new play called THE BUBBLE BOMG
Serves you right, creepy hand
Cats bat things out of the air
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p7wOLqrC6XU
Sgt Rock was excellent
I loved it. My mother hated it.
https://i.giphy.com/media/M1Gaui2DJPd84/giphy.webp
This is why I don’t play fantasy for $$$. That’s 35+ Cam points on my bench.
Also, HEY STUPID BURGER KING YOU CAN’T DESTROY A FLAT TOP GRIDDLE WITH FIRE FIRE IS ITS JOB
Now…if I can only remember where I put the screws that mount the power supply in the case I’ll be well on my way to completing my A/V setup
This game’s gotten a lot better since I started pouring Buffalo Trace down my throat.
Start chewin’, kid.
Man, I need to get a cat.
Just a note, you’re gonna have to teach it the sniper rifle stuff yourself.
How in all things holy is there still 12 minutes left in this game?
Biggest glory hole I’VE ever seen
Nice! It’s in a bar that has predominately …… never mind….
I don’t believe I want to see what might emerge from there.
Nothing; it is about middle class life in the US.
Damn dude.
Next shot:
“Sometimes I HATE alien pussy.”
-Cptn. Kirk
Okay, ordered new fuses. That’s probably not the actual problem, and I’ll probably figure out what it is and fix it before the new fuses arrive, but hey, no reason not to have extra fuses, right?
I’m confused Dok. You have electrical issues in the old place or the new place?
WHERE ARE YOU????????????????????
New place, hooking up stereo. And yeah, I just fixed it.
Hehehehe….well at least you blew it out for a good reason.
Crank it up and RIP OFF THE KNOB !!!!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tkbgtVFlyCQ
Does it go to 11? That’s one more.
^ This guy gets it.
Thank goodness for CTE so Julius Peppers doesn’t have to remember that he played for Green Bay or Chicago
‘Twas a good day.
Miami Dolphins should only be allowed to play on Thursday night football
McWrathly?
Am done. Night Folks.
Goodnight you princes and princesses of the Internet , you kings and queens of dick jokes
You know, starting Cam over Dak this week would have been a really good idea. My only excuse is that I didn’t really think about my lineup beyond making sure it was legal
Smart. It would be bad timing to roll out a 14 year old lineup.
Wellll, let’s not rule anything out….
As long as the NFL insists on televising Dolphins nationally, I will continue to post this photo from that horrifying movie about the Japanese slaughtering dolphins.
Kid rolls a real tight J.
What are the chances Gruden screws up and make a Weinstein rape joke before the end of this broadcast?
Less than the chances that Gruden knows Weinstein
“Johnny Come Lately…”
–Al Michaels