JV NFL Championship Saturday and Everton Sells Its Soul and Future

King Hippo

King Hippo

Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan.Also a proud fookin’ Evertonian.Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child.[Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
King Hippo

It’s with a heavy and angry heart that I write this.  As I noted on NSNO.co.uk, the creatures that live under rocks have won.  It is not enough for them to have Brexit and Trump, no.  They had to come for my Everton, too.  I can not, and will not support a known corrupt, anti-footballing, backwards, self-promoting asshole in the manager’s chair.  One who burns down the foundation of every club he manages – setting up the next manager to take the drop – who will surely ruin the only positives that exist in the form of Everton’s youth system and young offensive prospects.  And if Everton is dead to me, so is Lesser Footy in general.  Until it is time to pick up the pieces left in Fat Sam’s giant, fetid wake.  I thank Balls, Litre, and perhaps others for filling in for me (in the coming weeks) on this beat.

Chelsea get the Barcodes this Saturday early (7:30, NBCSN), followed by a meh 10:00 window highlighted by Brighton & Hove v. Redshite (NBCSN).  I would be reading even if I weren’t boycotting.  The Moose Hornets take on Spurs over on CNBC and yeah, ok, that’s pretty interesting.  Fuck the rest of it.

Arsenal and Man U are the big NBC 12:30 spotlight dance, giving us a chance to see just how resurrected the Gooners are.  After all, the race for 2nd is all the tracing they is.

NBCSN’s Sunday no-funday doubleheader is Bournemouth/Soton (8:30) followed by City making some god-awful form of meat pie out of West Ham (11:00).  YMMV.

On to the fun shit, conference championships galore!

Memphis at Central Florida, AAC (Noon, ABC)

Last week’s Directional Florida fixture was bananacakes, and one wonders if maybe the Knights will still be a bit hungover from that.  In any event, this will be a scoring fest, and worthy of channel flipping at least.

TCU v. Oklahoma, Big 12-ish (12:30, Fox)

The first time these sides played, Boomer Sooner prevailed easily.  But that was at home.  However, the Okies are on even more of a roll now, arguably playing better than any non-Aubie side around.  But Bloodeyes is never who you want to play with your playoff life on the line.  That’s waaaaayyyy too many caveats, and I’m still happy to hold a ticket on OU -4.5.

Georgia v. Auburn, SEEEEECCCCC, PAWWWWWLLLL (4:00, CBS)

Everybody seems to have forgotten about UGA (myself included), which makes me a bit nervous.  They were considered the best side in the land most of the year, but Auburn is just an awful matchup for them.  The Dawgs don’t pass that well, or often.  And Aubie is just physical as fuck, as we all saw in the Iron Bowl last week.  As stated above, easily the hottest side in all the JV landscape.

Fresno State at Boise State, MWC (7:45, ESPN)

Fresh off the dry run last week, these two will go at it once again.  One wonders why they didn’t stagger the time for a tweaker fixture?

Miami v. Clemson, ACC (8:00, ABC)

I always suspected Da U was gonna shit itself at some point, so glad they did so last week v. Pitt to get it out of the way.  Perhaps Team Jeebus Camp will be overconfident and get its hat handed to them.  I sure hope so.

Ohio State v. Wisconsin, B1G (8:00, Fox)

Finally, Bucky Badger will have its national “shit or get off the pot” moment.  Win, and they’re in.  tOSU is a bit up and down, and not sure they have enough to take them out, without their absolute A game (which they bring maybe once in four).

King Hippo
King Hippo

Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin’ Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]

Leave a Reply

Notify of
scotchnaut
Member

Best Salad Ever? Egg

/come at me

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

If done well, Potato every day and twice on Sundays.

scotchnaut
Member

[shakes head]

“YOU ARE A JELLO! What do you know about salads?

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

comment image
“YOU TAKE THAT BACK!”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Redshirt
Member

Watch Georgia end up as a 5 tomorrow.

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

SEC Champ not make it in? The reaction to that would make Sherman’s march to the sea look like a nature hike.

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

That’s an awful lot of red in Megatron’s butthole tonight.

Mr. Ayo
Member
Mr. Ayo

He had his mew-maw’s beet stew last night.

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

Aubie seems to have shot its wad in the Iron Bowl.

BrettFavresColonoscopy
Member

War Eagle?

Shogun Marcus
Member

Damn.

Mr. Ayo
Member
Mr. Ayo

comment image

WCS
Member

This means we can go back to forgetting about the entire state of Alabama for a while, right?

/remembers Roy Moore’s Senate campaign

DAMN IT

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers
Member

comment image

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

Welp, thanks for keeping Bama out of the playoffs, Aubie, now go get your shine box.

Redshirt
Member

Bama will sneak in if Wisconsin slips up.

WCS
Member

comment image

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

You’re right, but still go fuck yourself.

/jus’kiddin

Redshirt
Member

Maybe if I stretch first and… oh joking okay.

Redshirt
Member

TV: “Ohio State has a chance if they win.”
Me: “Yeah, a snowball’s chance in Hell.”
TV: “That’s still a chance!”

Mr. Ayo
Member
Mr. Ayo

“There’s a chance of a snowball with Clay”
-A.A. Rod

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

This Chubb is one hard runner, really just pounding it in the hole over and over…

rockingdog
Member
rockingdog

Ohhhhh Chick Fil A….How I love you so.

WCS
Member

HAWT TAEK ALART: Chik-Fil-A blows.

Mr. Ayo
Member
Mr. Ayo

Never been. Guess I’m not missing out.

Shogun Marcus
Member

Wouldn’t know. They haven’t ventured this north.

Senor Weaselo
Member

Went to the one in the city. It was okay. Not an epiphany.

WCS
Member

All yinz are “missing” is mediocre chicken that’s ridiculously overpriced, served in a place that has a weird cult-like feel.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers
Member

You know how they feel about that.

But you’re not wrong.

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

If I’m on the road, it makes a good change from the usual fast-food burger joints.

Fronkenshteen
Member

Hippo! Antonio Brown gon’ play? Martavis might be worth a shot if no.

Redshirt
Member

/ gulps

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

Wheels coming off the Auburn?
comment image

rockingdog
Member
rockingdog

Looks like it

Fronkenshteen
Member

We are literally the Whos in Whoville now. We’re decorating our $35 tree, eating pasta and sauce and meatballs, my cat (who delivered us a wonderful mouse) is cleaning herself curled up on my sweatpanted crotch. The dog has had some leftover turkey. Our rent is paid. Our cars are street legal. My son has a wonderful kindergarten teacher. And it’s 68 F in the house. Take all the tax money you want, motherfuckers. We’re piled on top of each other like a litter of puppies.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers
Member

So things are lively in Vegas. Dok is off playing poker and probably raking in cash, while tWBS and I are enjoying a sports bar with many libations and everything on.

Room is pretty divided, so making for a good experience.

Mr. Right is inbound shortly, and that’s when the party gets going.

Shogun Marcus
Member

I’m so happy you were able to find your true love. Dreams CAN come true!

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers
Member

Sunday Gravy might have more than one meaning this week…

Shogun Marcus
Member

*mental note…do NAWT eat any glazed doughnuts from lcss or twbs…
Mr. Right is alright though.

rockingdog
Member
rockingdog

I really like these 2 announcers for this SEC champ game.

Mr. Ayo
Member
Mr. Ayo

Nessler is great, but Danielson can eat a big bag of plague

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

Showoff.

Fronkenshteen
Member

If any of you guys’ car ever breaks down on Rt. 81 in Northern VA, the good news is, once I come pick you up, I can have homemade spaghetti & meatballs & sausage on the table for you in less than 90 minutes. You’ll be like Bruno Kirby in Godfather 2, guaranteed.

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

Not fer nuthin, but if you break down on I-95 around Quantico, I’ve got….let’s see…bourbon, amaretto, whiskey…

Never mind.

herodotus450
Member
herodotus450

I heard there’s good pizza around there
comment image
Or maybe it’s just from there…

LemonJello
Member
LemonJello

BLEERGH is running loose in the SEC, PAWWWWLLLLL.

herodotus450
Member
herodotus450

Interesting and nuanced analysis from this CBS SEC CREw? (On the field goal block about the kicker being slow). I guess SOMEONE has to be competent to make up for these clowns in congress.

WCS
Member

HAIL SHAN’KLHOR

Fronkenshteen
Member

I know OU did well by Hippo. How’s everyone else’s action tonight?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

herodotus450
Member
herodotus450

Eliza Coupe is my jam; but damn, if the camera adds 10 pounds she must be -2 in real life.

herodotus450
Member
herodotus450

Who invited Ken Burns to this CBS SEC CHAmpionship game halftime show ?

theeWeeBabySeamus
Member

UGa gon’ pull away any time now.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

They still gon get pregnant.

Shogun Marcus
Member

The rhythm is gonna get you…

Mr. Ayo
Member
Mr. Ayo

comment image

Unsurprised
Member
Unsurprised

Howdy.

comment image

Mr. Ayo
Member
Mr. Ayo

She seems nice

Unsurprised
Member
Unsurprised

Right?

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

yeah right
Member

Holy shit does TSA pre screen fucking rule. Keep your shoes and belt on put your wallet and phone in your bag and walk the fuck through. Now I’ve got an extra hour at LAX.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Member
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

scotchnaut
Member

“Is this the ‘I Ron So Far Away Bowl’?”

-A Flock of Seagulls, watching Georgia/Auburn

rockingdog
Member
rockingdog

TD Georgia!

rockingdog
Member
rockingdog

comment image

rockingdog
Member
rockingdog

comment image

BrettFavresColonoscopy
Member

Think what he does to the sleeping vegetables…

wpDiscuz