It’s with a heavy and angry heart that I write this. As I noted on NSNO.co.uk, the creatures that live under rocks have won. It is not enough for them to have Brexit and Trump, no. They had to come for my Everton, too. I can not, and will not support a known corrupt, anti-footballing, backwards, self-promoting asshole in the manager’s chair. One who burns down the foundation of every club he manages – setting up the next manager to take the drop – who will surely ruin the only positives that exist in the form of Everton’s youth system and young offensive prospects. And if Everton is dead to me, so is Lesser Footy in general. Until it is time to pick up the pieces left in Fat Sam’s giant, fetid wake. I thank Balls, Litre, and perhaps others for filling in for me (in the coming weeks) on this beat.
Chelsea get the Barcodes this Saturday early (7:30, NBCSN), followed by a meh 10:00 window highlighted by Brighton & Hove v. Redshite (NBCSN). I would be reading even if I weren’t boycotting. The Moose Hornets take on Spurs over on CNBC and yeah, ok, that’s pretty interesting. Fuck the rest of it.
Arsenal and Man U are the big NBC 12:30 spotlight dance, giving us a chance to see just how resurrected the Gooners are. After all, the race for 2nd is all the tracing they is.
NBCSN’s Sunday no-funday doubleheader is Bournemouth/Soton (8:30) followed by City making some god-awful form of meat pie out of West Ham (11:00). YMMV.
On to the fun shit, conference championships galore!
Memphis at Central Florida, AAC (Noon, ABC)
Last week’s Directional Florida fixture was bananacakes, and one wonders if maybe the Knights will still be a bit hungover from that. In any event, this will be a scoring fest, and worthy of channel flipping at least.
TCU v. Oklahoma, Big 12-ish (12:30, Fox)
The first time these sides played, Boomer Sooner prevailed easily. But that was at home. However, the Okies are on even more of a roll now, arguably playing better than any non-Aubie side around. But Bloodeyes is never who you want to play with your playoff life on the line. That’s waaaaayyyy too many caveats, and I’m still happy to hold a ticket on OU -4.5.
Georgia v. Auburn, SEEEEECCCCC, PAWWWWWLLLL (4:00, CBS)
Everybody seems to have forgotten about UGA (myself included), which makes me a bit nervous. They were considered the best side in the land most of the year, but Auburn is just an awful matchup for them. The Dawgs don’t pass that well, or often. And Aubie is just physical as fuck, as we all saw in the Iron Bowl last week. As stated above, easily the hottest side in all the JV landscape.
Fresno State at Boise State, MWC (7:45, ESPN)
Fresh off the dry run last week, these two will go at it once again. One wonders why they didn’t stagger the time for a tweaker fixture?
Miami v. Clemson, ACC (8:00, ABC)
I always suspected Da U was gonna shit itself at some point, so glad they did so last week v. Pitt to get it out of the way. Perhaps Team Jeebus Camp will be overconfident and get its hat handed to them. I sure hope so.
Ohio State v. Wisconsin, B1G (8:00, Fox)
Finally, Bucky Badger will have its national “shit or get off the pot” moment. Win, and they’re in. tOSU is a bit up and down, and not sure they have enough to take them out, without their absolute A game (which they bring maybe once in four).