The first mea culpa is a good one. I was really against what I saw as an overly sentimental, at best pointless, at worst poisonous, signing of boyhood Evertonian Wayne Rooney this summer. Yes, even on a free, with United kicking in around half his wages on the hush-hush. I
There are people who love summer. They are called tan extroverts. They can go fuck themselves with a rusty screwdriver. Summer is a humid, bug-infested sports wasteland. Forget Christmas, this is when people ought to be killing themselves in droves.
All that's left is fucking baseball. And even that cold comfort
That's right, fuckers. 2/3 of CNBC/NBCSN's Sunday triple-header are where it's at this week. Everton and Romelu Lukaku will seek to avenge a dreadful trip to Stanford Bridge when they host the League leaders (9:05, CNBC). A draw can always happen, so a Toffee result opens the door for some
Everton starts this weekend's festivities with a visit to Anfield to take on the hated Redshite (7:30, NBCSN), a ground at which they have not won since Jeebus walked the Earth. To make matters worse, over the interminably boring international break that preceded this crucial match (not only for pride
Yes, it's almost time to be consumed with our office pools and the like. But first, there is some unfinished business in the Prem worth watching, like the amazing seasons of strikers Harry Kane (Spurs) and Romelu Lukaku (Everton). It's quite refreshing that neither of the marquee goal scorers plays for
Let's DO BETTER, shall we?
Things kick off bright and early Saturday (7:30, NBCSN), with 3rd position Spurs hosting surprisingly pesky West Brom. The Albion (least imposing mascot EVAR ,, amirite??) sit in 8th, only 1 point behind Everton. Hopefully, the unbeaten form at White Hart Lane continues, because
Way to go, 2017. As of this writing, Fox Sports Go is all borken (won't let me log in under my cable login or brother-in-law's Dish Network one), so I can't even check for a random secondary feed. I will likely be stuck listening to the terrible radio
Sometimes, I really have a hard time getting out of bed, even with a full day of footy lying ahead. It is very easy to be as cynical about footy as it is life in general. Then, you read an article like this and boom, one falls in
I had two more macro observations on the EPL season. First, if'n you take a gander at the table, everyone is right where a purist would say they should be. That is, nobody is higher in the table than a side with a better goal differential. I
Pictured is Ronald Koeman, in a rare smiling pose. Despite being unbeaten on the young season (with three wins on the bounce, after humiliating David Moyes on Monday Night Footy with some help from Big Rom), Big Ron is something of a perfectionist, always urging his players to strive
As the above-pictured Romelu Lukaku (Everton WOO!!!!) goal may remind you, Belgium are the side that took out los Estados Unidos in the Round of Sixteen at the 2014 World Cup (aka, the last time fellow Evertonian Tim Howard wasn't a sack of monkeyshit). Unlike his Cutler-sulky Blues teammate
As an Evertonian, I'm up early today mostly to boo. Plus I have to wake up kids and drive them around for various school-related shit. Parenting is hard, even half-assed single Dad parenting.
Yes, our dear friends at Leicester City only need 3 points out of 9 (or Spurs