Howdy friends and neighbors! Well shit, just look at that! It’s another season of Sunday Gravy!
Hope everyone had a nice NFL season. For the new folks out there, Sunday Gravy is one of the regular offseason features here at Door Flies Open that helps guide you weary football fans through the long, cold, interminable, offseason. This feature is where I offer up real food recipes along with original food photography, food tips, suggestions and all sorts of general food-centric frivolity.
Got a food related question? Ask in the comment section and I’ll do my best to get an answer for you.
I think this is technically Season 4 of Sunday Gravy since I began this feature shortly after the very birth of DFO back in 2015. So fuck it, Season 4 it is.
Should I use the NFL concept of using the Roman numerals “IV?”
Fuck off. I will not. You’ll get “4” and like it!
Again, if you’re new, feel free to take a stroll through the Sunday Gravy Archives.
That should help get you in the spirit of things.
For those of you keeping score, today’s menu will be my 72nd menu that I’ve given you since the start of this endeavor.
Seventy fucking two menus.
I say menus rather than recipes because many of the menus contain more than 1 recipe. Today for instance I’m giving you 3 separate foods.
Holy cat shit that’s a lot of goddamn cooking.
The photo just above from the old Mary Tyler Moore show is indeed appropriate for today’s feature since I will be bringing you the Twin Cities version of a stuffed burger called the “Jucy Lucy.”
I will also give you a quick look at some cheesy bacon tots and another look at some deviled eggs. Basically you get the recipes for what the right household consumed for the Superb Owl. Bookmark for next football season if you like.
Inspiration for today’s meal was from my trip to Minnesota last October where I visited the Twin Cities and saw the Vikings unceremoniously beat the crap out of the Baltimore Ravens. During the visit we did indeed sample a version of the Jucy Lucy.
This was called the Jucy Lucifer and had habanero jack cheese instead of American cheese. This burger came from a very cool underground restaurant and bar in Minneapolis called Hell’s Kitchen. Their home page will also show you the goddamn insane fucking shit they do to a bloody Mary. That shit still freaks me out.
“Don’t you want your beefstick?”
The origin of the Jucy Lucy is under debate to this day. Matt’s Bar in Minneapolis has an origin story going back to 1954. The other originator claimant is the 5-8 Club. They offer no origin story but they mention being a speakeasy dating back to the Prohibition Era of the 1920’s. It’s one of those odd local food disputes similar to the origin of the Italian Beef sandwich in Chicago or the origin of the French Dip here in L.A. That would be Philippe’s by the way.
The Jucy Lucy is a burger that is stuffed with cheese rather than the cheese being on top. That’s all. It was quite tasty and there were no shortages of restaurants and bars in the Twin Cities offering their own version of one. Basically you go to Minnesota, eat a Jucy Lucy, have some cheese curds, drink a Surly craft beer and basically freeze your ass off.
Look a full itinerary!
While at the Mall of America – yes, like a goddamn tourist – we came across this gadget:
It’s a Jucy Lucy maker. Basically it’s a three piece plastic mold that allows you to press, fill and make a stuffed burger at home. Here’s a better look.
You press down the meat with the lid creating an indentation. Fill the indentation with cheese and then put a burger lid on it. Simple!
The only issue is if you use the press it ends up making a burger that is at least 3/4 of a pound BEFORE adding in the weight of the cheese. Since I was hosting the game and wanted my guests to not have a fucking coronary while watching the game we built ours by hand. Thirteen bucks down the drain!
The Jucy Lucy!
Some buns.
Some hamburger meat.
A binding agent if preferred
Some cheese.
Salt and pepper to taste.
Various burger condiments and toppings.
Yes, I usually give a more formal recipe than this but the amounts will vary on the number of people you are feeding. We found that the optimum pre-cook burger size is about 1/3 of a pound per burger.
We also pan fried these for a couple of reasons; one: we were watching the goddamn game and I didn’t want to fuck with the grill and 2: if you grill these and the burger springs a cheese leak then all of that cheese will just drip down on top of the coals and you will have fucked your Lucy good! If you cook on the stove top you can use a pair of tongs to grab the leaky burger and place it on it’s edge effectively cauterizing the cheese wound.
Fuck it! Let’s build one!
Combine the hamburger with some seasonings of choice. I used salt, pepper, onion powder and garlic powder. I also added a splash of milk and some crumbled tortilla chips to act as a binding agent. Mix this together with your hands.
Form the hamburger into a concave shape making room for the cheese. Daughter eldest right called this “making a meat boat” which is just all kinds of fucking awesome. After making your meat boat, add in the cheese.
Make a flat layer of hamburger to act as the “lid” for the burger and press the edges to seal in the cheese. Use caution and get a good seal because we are trying to avoid the cheese leak. We still had about a 33% amount of leakage that we mitigated with the tongs and the “cauterizing” thing.
Form all of your burgers and get ready to cook.
Using a skillet over medium heat it’s time to get busy.
Season with a little more salt and pepper. The medium heat thing is pretty critical since we want to make sure the burger is cooked through and that the interior cheese gets melted. I also used a lid to cover, both before flipping the burgers as well as after flipping. I gave this about 4 minutes for the first side. Here’s the first flip.
Add a little more salt and pepper. Cover with the lid again and cook for about 4 minutes more.
When cooked, place the burger on a bun, add some condiments or toppings – I used a little mustard and a dab of ketchup – and wait. Wait a couple of minutes more. WAIT!
Now go!
Obviously chomping down on one of these bastards right out of the pan would melt your entire face and throat with fire and molten cheese. DON’T DO THAT! See? I even sliced mine in half before eating. Granted some of that was for a sexy melty cheese photo but still.
By the way my food photos are still catching up from the offseason. I’ll get better.
These things are really fucking tasty and super easy to make. I used Velveeta cheese for these and that will change. I wanted to be sure of a good melt for a sexy photo. Next time I will use something else. Plain American, white American cheese or more than likely some pepper jack. Delicious burger and a cool effect. Make these!
Since we were hosting the Superb Owl party we needed a little more sustenance. So we also made these:
Cheesy Bacon Tots!
I don’t have to give a recipe for these do I?
Seriously?
Fuck it, cook some frozen tater tots to the package’s specification. At the same time that the tots are in the oven, cook some bacon until crispy. When the tots are done, leave the oven on, add the crumbled bacon over the top of the tots and then sprinkle on some cheese over the top. I used cheddar. Place the pan back into the oven for about 5 minutes until the cheese melts.
Serve with your Jucy Lucy.
That covers the meal but didn’t we have some type of appetizer before the game?
Fucking A right, man!
Let’s make some deviled eggs.
Some eggs! I used 10.
Boiling water.
Salt and pepper to taste.
1/3 cup of mayonnaise.
1/4 cup of mustard – I used this stuff
it’s a spicy brown mustard with a little horseradish kick and a tiny bit of sweetness from maple syrup. It works great for these.
1 teaspoon of minced fresh dill.
Some essence for a garnish.
Put the eggs into a pot for cooking and cover with enough water to cover the eggs by about an inch. Bring to a boil.
As soon as the eggs reach a boil, remove from heat, cover the pot with a lid, set a kitchen timer to 12 minutes and leave them alone.
Next get a large bowl and fill with some ice water. Once the eggs have sat for the allotted 12 minutes, drain the water from the pot of eggs and dump the eggs into the ice bath to stop the cooking process. Let the eggs sit in the ice bath for about 5 minutes.
If you want to simply make a batch of hard boiled eggs that’s your motherfucker right there. Know what’s cool? A batch of hardboiled eggs will last for a week in your refrigerator before spoiling. Make some hardboiled eggs on Sunday and you have an easy as fuck breakfast for the week. Make a piece of whole grain toast, crack open a hardboiled egg, add a little salt and pepper. Boom Motherfucker! Breakfast and a solid source of protein.
We’re going to remove all of the health benefits though and fatten these babies up!
Slice the eggs lengthwise and scoop out the yolks. Place the yolks in their own bowl and put the egg white halves on a plate.
If you’ll notice I batted 1.000 with these goddamn egg whites! A perfect slice and nary a fucked up egg white. I fucking rule!
Next take the yolks and add in the mayo, the mustard and the dill along with a small dash of salt and a few grinds of black pepper.
Use a spoon or even a fork and mix this well. If you want to do a bunch of these and use the “plastic bag for piping trick” put all the ingredients into a 1 gallon zip top bag and squish all this shit together until mixed. Next snip off a corner of the bag and pipe the egg yolk filling mixture directly into the egg white, garnish with “Essence” chill for a few minutes and serve.
Or you can just use a tablespoon and your hands to fill the eggs. Your call. When done and dusted with a garnish and chilled you have have a plate of loveliness something like this.
Now all you need are about 87 beers, a few bottles of wine and shots of your favorite hard liquor to host an unforgettable Superb Owl party.
You may notice that I paid homage to the host city of the game and not to either team?
Goddamn right I did.
Well folks, thanks as always for reading and it’s going to be a fun filled and magical season of Sunday Gravy.
As long as someone else does the dishes I’ve got this motherfucker.
See you next week!
PEACE!
That picture is about the only time you can eat out Jucy Lucy and not follow that up with taking anti-biotics.
Welcome back, Yeah Right. I look forward to making some of this stuff again.
Seriously, even if you are so bad at cooking you can burn water, give this stuff a try. It’s not that difficult. Just give yourself lots of time, have some alcohol and have fun. These are good recipes.
All of the recipes I offer have been created with the assistance of alcohol.
When you assemble your burger casing together, an appropriate sized onion ring makes an effective seal between the two quadrants. Cheese-chamber integrity can be maintained through effective gasket use, reducing leakage incidents from 33% down to 10% or even less. The Japanese are working on onion chevron-seals that reduce cheese compromise to below 1%; these are still in the experimental phase.
That’s fucking incredible.
Matinee hockey? Fuck yes!
You know what they say!
When the NFL goes away
Other leagues gonna play? … … on Sun day?
Sorry, I forgot the image.
“Let’s do dat hockey.”
I can’t stand matinee hockey because I always forget to set my lineup in fantasy hockey.
MSG has evidently given up on the Ice Giants, since the channel is currently broken instead of showing them down 1-0 to the Ice Bombers.
In “glad yesterday was GAMBLOR Day” news…Cuse and Wake both somehow finished in the 70s!
Florida, USA:
oh yeah, dat Florida alrighty!
Tampa?
Alabama East?
“You promised me you wouldn’t tell!”
That’s why I don’t fuck around with rails and never have. I’m a lot more comfortable having ten feet of air between me and the ground than being anywhere close to a gigantic hunk of metal like that.
Fuck yeah curling! Though I am disappointed with the lack of crazy Norwegian pants
Mr. T approves of curling!
Just back from the vet.
I’ll take that one!
That’s a great name for a burger.
Perfect 10, no splash.
She’s frigid tho.
Takes me back.
Jucy Lucys filled with chorizo are also great. How ‘bout your new OC, YR?
http://theeagleswire.usatoday.com/2018/02/10/new-vikings-oc-john-defilippo-opened-up-about-carson-wentz-nick-foles/amp/?__twitter_impression=true
Chorizo-stuffed burgers?
Intrigued, newsletter…
I’m cautiously pleased with the hire. I’m just happy we didn’t go for a retread hire like McAdoo. He will hopefully step right in. I also like A QB centric O coordinator. We’ll see.
Love the chorizo idea.
Thinly sliced, a stack of 3 or 4. Woof.
Mexican or Spanish chorizo? I’ll bet either could be made to work.
Mmmm. Mexican chorizo with some chihuahua cheese sounds pretty solid. Maybe a little Rotel for you Texas fellers.
Nobody is going with the “Hot sausage stuffed in Juicy Lucy.” joke??
Translated graffiti from Roman times Pompeii:
“Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!“
“Amplicatus, I know that Icarus is buggering you. Salvius wrote this.“
“We two dear men, friends forever, were here. If you want to know our names, they are Gaius and Aulus.“
“Floronius, privileged soldier of the 7th legion, was here. The women did not know of his presence. Only six women came to know, too few for such a stallion.“
“On April 19th, I made bread.“
“ I have buggered men.“
“If anyone does not believe in Venus, they should gaze at my girlfriend.“
“It took 640 paces to walk back and forth between here and there ten times.“
“Chie, I hope your hemorrhoids rub together so much that they hurt worse than when they every have before!“
“Epaphra is not good at ball games.”
“Two friends were here. While they were, they had bad service in every way from a guy named Epaphroditus. They threw him out and spent 105 and half sestertii most agreeably on whores.“
“Secundus likes to screw boys.“
Some things never change.
And thus, the Penn State fight song was born.
Ooops; the last one is accusing Sanduski; never mind.
Secundus…. Sanduski…… hummm
Also it appears prostitutes may have been less expensive in those days.
“Thy pimp-hand shall be maintained with strength”
Is 105.5 sestertii a good or bad price for whores?
Asking for a friend.
My other response is just a guess.
The American took silver in the luge, leading the announcer to holler “The luge world will be speechless!”, which is the first time I’ve ever heard that there was a luge world, or that it had a voice.
That means there is luge porn.
Moar liek…….
You can take short-track speed skating from me when you pry it from my cold dead mittens.
I’m giving this comment two wool socks up.
Oh fuck yeah, we’ve got luge coming up, and an American is apparently in contention for a medal.
Luge rules.
A luge spitting contest?
Distance, or accuracy?
Yes
I think they have a mixed event too, like decathlon; may include vomiting for distance AND accuracy.
In more stunning news, the guy leading the race apparently has “exercise-induced asthma” and is therefore allowed to take a medication that is otherwise considered a PED; he recently was reprimanded for taking way too much of it.
Honestly, it seems that the only people with a chance at success in endurance sports are the people with some sort of disorder that allows them to use PEDs.
– Chris Davis
That guy has a forehead a Cro-Magnon would be proud to hang his loincloth from.
Maybe I could get away with juicing by claiming it’s to reduce the size of my massive penis?
No…no I couldn’t.
Having seen exercise-induced asthma in action; it is a far greater impediment than some healthy person that is “clean.”
I’m sure that the real thing is. I just find it interesting that a hell of a lot of endurance athletes seem to have it.
Chris Froome, for instance.
http://www.cyclingnews.com/news/vaughters-chris-froome-should-do-the-honourable-thing/
Well I believe it is diagnosed and documented; so if you fake it somehow that would be cheating. Cheaters prosper.
Re: Banner pic.
YAY BEER!
This race is actually pretty amazing. Cross-country skiing with any sort of effort is exhausting, and these lunatics are racing 18+ miles. And the wind gusts are knocking them around. So much more interesting to watch than figure skating or snowboarding.
I like the skating coverage only to see what kind of ‘do Johnny Weir’s gonna be rockin’ that day,
You will all no doubt be shocked to learn that the Finns and Norwegians seem to be in the forefront for gold in the 30k cross-country ski event.
Isn’t that like, just walking home from work for them anyway?
Up hill, in the snow, both ways.
With fifty pounds of books! And firewood!
Nothing like loving snowshoeing and cross-country skiing and watching Olympic x-country while getting 2+ inches of rain in Connecticut to make one hate Scott Pruitt just that much more.
Not sure I could hate him more, but he has potential.
I don’t even know what to say.
https://twitter.com/KrangTNelson/status/962756016919244800
Did Sosa fall into a vat of Joker-Brand(TM) Bleach?
The response with the SNL “Pat” character is worth it.
I agree. That was truly inspired.
This is every bit as fugly as Scotchy foretold.
/said before Wake missed wide-open dunk
When you said “Gravy Premier” I thought you were talking about Georgy Malenkov.
Mike Pence is the white gravy premier.
Wake/Cuse, in beautiful Standard Definition!
What channel gotz the Wake/’Cuse action? I’m tired of listening to Dan Bonner on Wiscy/Michigan. Also, it’s Wiscy/Michigan.
the CBS “alt” channel, where they put the 3:30 SEC games until the 12:30 Raycom game ends. 1255 on my cable
Hmmmmm…not sure DirecTV has that one. Time to call and yell at DirecTV?
Nah, maybe later.
Oh found it anyway. Channel 2 in G’boro.
I just didn’t go down low enough before. Phrasing.
Funny enough, today I am cooking Yeah Right’s mother sauce but doing it in a slow cooker cuz mah wife wants to go to teh pub for brunch!
cooking Yeah Right’s mother sauce
That’s a smart idea, eliminates the frequent stirring.
Yay, Sunday Gravy is back, baby!!!!
But it always makes me hungry. Now Imma hafta go eat sommet.
But nicely done as always Yeah Right.
Also, go Ice NawtRamsNoMo.
So great to have this back. I’m off to the grocery store!
Get tots!
Get tots!
-Larry Nasser
Check. And a YUUUUGE bag of cheddar. And 1lb of slab bacon from the butcher. Going to be a great afternoon.
A sprinkling of fresh chives or scallions on top is also a good option.
This is why you’re the best.
I thought that was just a hot photo of Michelle Bachmann
Only on Opposite Day.
You know they’ve got a statue of that in Minneapolis? One of the locals said they moved it over near Target Field. I’ve never felt the need to see it and still haven’t thrown a hat in the air.
I threw a hat at a cat.
Hooray!
If you want to start hating basketball, you should give the Cuse/Wake Forest tilt a looky-loo. She’s gonna be real ugly.
they are only showing it on the digital/alternate channels here, it’s such an ugly matchup. And Pitt/Ville ain’t on at all (maybe Pitt’s last good chance to get a league win, only 11 point dogs).
I’ve got it on WSBK, whatever that is.
Welcome back!
Frozen tater tots are one of my favorite secret weapons. Some folks might turn their nose up at such plebeian fare, until you’re not looking. Hotdish anyone?
That post was a lot of work, nicely done.
Thanks. The menu was sneaky since no single item was that challenging but when doing them all. At once? My daughter is an amazing human and an amazing kitchen assistant. Plus a solid drinking buddy.
It’s good to be back. Now I’ve got to get busy for next week’s post.
So I’ve decided to take my PE exam. Signed up for these stupid online classes and then promptly fucked up my schedule by a month, all my own doing, I’ve got to catch up on seven classes (plus offline studying) after getting through my first (#8) course I’m about ten minutes.
I’m not feeling very bullish on this exam.
hey, I didn’t know you were a fellow “prehensile tail” engineer! But I have chosen to remain E.I.T. FOAR life, yo.
I don’t really *need* it but it’d help us some. It’s just that I’m. So. Damn. Dumb.
but then you ain’t never have to think again! You be the mofo who signs drawings, drinks coffee, and takes 3 hour lunches every day (if any engineering office I ever worked in/observed is any guide)…
Literally, the only thing I want to do is stamp our friction loss calcs (which a computer program spits out). That’s it – I already have to hold our customers’ hands enough; they don’t need to even think about ever asking me, “hey, will you stamp ______?”
Our PEs have to work; most of our engineers are PEs (more$/hr.). Stamping drawings is also a fantastic stress add in this litigious country.
The number per office probably varies by state, where I worked, they only felt the need to have one between the 2 offices (Charlotte and Greensboro), too expensive to pay them.
It helps us in marketing, credentialing, and being “experts.” The experts part is really on your project resume.
If I would have gotten mine when the opportunity was there I would not have had to kill people to move up in the company.
It was my Dad’s greatest professional regret. My mom says he had no idea why he didn’t do it, but she thinks it was a confidence issue – “what if I fail?” despite lots of people failing the first, or even 2nd time around (at least in NC). He was a really fucking good engineer and manager, but always doubted his abilities at both.
My brother’s an HVAC guy, got his a few years ago. They still don’t get him enough help, to where he still ends up doing everyone else’s work for them.
I failed a few years back on my first go-around. Pass or fail, I think this might be my last time taking the exam. I was a terrible student so it wasn’t a huge surprise. I feel like now that I don’t really need it, I feel a lot more relaxed about it. But we’ll see; I’ve forgotten so much of this shit (I do about 0 real engineering on a daily basis anymore).
DFO will encourage you in your drinking and drug use, so I’m sure that will help. Huzzah, imaginary desert chum!
Soton are really dire, and shall go down with Stoke and WBA. For some reason, this makes me super happy.
I remember someone being a Soton fan around these parts.
Had a long story about the extreme pain that came with relegation, too! 😀
Want to hear mine????
/no one wants to hear mine.
Man, it the offseason. And a SUNDAY. Of course, we’d love a story!
I was recently divorced with my rebound woman. Teh mighty Fulham had a terrible season and changed ownership to the Khaaaaaaannnnns. Coaching all year was abysmal. When they lost and it was official I went outside for a smoke and came back in.
“I don’t know what your problem is, that other team Chelsea is so close to Fulham. You can just go and visit your friends and go to their games”
“Excuse me? I think I need to take Oxipug for a walk”
“You are so childish, maybe the walk will help you clear your head”
It did, I returned after burning one on a long walk. I hoped that she had left. She had not. I proceeded to pack her things that were at my condo and told her that we weren’t made for each other and maybe she could “find a Chelsea fan down at the pub”
I was still more upset when Diego fucking Forlan scored in extra time to defeat teh Cottagers in the Europa League Final. Fuck me I am still mad and hate that fuckwit so much.
HOLY SHIT, what a cunt.
/ takes out Enemies List
// dots “i”s with ♥️s
them’s good eatin??
Animal Control officers?
“WHEEEEEE”
That may be the most fucked-up puppet show I’ve seen.
This is truly delightful to see Mourinho take an L.
I will be making the “Juicy Lucy” that just sounds wrong. I dated a woman a few years ago who described herself as juicy as she never in her life needed lube.
Goals to Newcastle!!!!!
/waits for pun police to storm the house
The marking of Sanchez has been…clean. [sticks out tongue, waits for liquor store to open]
I have a food-related tip that I had to relearn yet again this morning: if something is too hot to hold in your hand (say, a squirt of hot cheese from inside a Juicy Lucy), do NOT, under any circumstances, try to remedy this by putting it in your mouth.
This is why I stopped telling my GF “my dick is hot for you”
Watching Man U v. Newcastle and I just unironically yelled “Oh that’s a lovely ball!” on a great, long pass by Newcastle and this is all Hippo’s fault.
[looks in mirror, sighs sadly]
– Nate Solder
I went a different route, but like yours equally.
And what’s with all the refs in this game? And they’re playing? How can they possibly be objective? Cricket is easier to figure out than this shit!
I do it all the time. Wife looks at me funny and states “You aren’t in the UK anymore”
“Thanks!”
-Lance Armstrong
I make deviled eggs for family get-togethers and not once has there been any left over. Doesn’t matter how much I make. I’m not saying this to puff myself up, I’m saying it because my wife’s family as a whole would give up their respective first born’s for the simple pleasure of popping those things in their mouths. Yeah, it’s really weird.
I had to skip the hardboiled egg breakfast for a week because I’m pretty sure I ate close to half of that plate. If you compare the first photo of the egg whites to the finished photo, yeah that was mostly me.
My mom used to make great deviled eggs and one of my aunts used the same recipe. I have another aunt that makes them that taste bad; too much vinegar and something else I can’t quite place; I don’t even do the polite have one thing anymore and she always makes them.
Cool story bro.
Also a nice option is adding crumbled bacon to the filling mix. Horseradish is awesome in deviled eggs. I learned that from the DFO pub crawl at the Tam O’shanter.