Yeah sure, it’s Friday the 13th. But we’re ignoring that. Mostly because I just did that six months ago.
But, did I ever tell you guys I got married on a Friday the 13th? True story, Bro.
My marriage sucked all teh ass. It almost killed me (literally), truth be told. Not because it started on a Friday the 13th. But rather because I was an idiot. I can own that.
I’m not bitter….YOU’RE BITTER!!!!!!
(ahem)
We live and we learn. Hopefully.
Sadly, sometimes we don’t learn as quickly as we should. Sometimes, we even repeat past mistakes (and by “we”, of course I mean “me” because I’m stupid). But, as long as we’re still above ground and trying, that’s what counts. And hopefully, eventually, we recognize our shitty patterns of mistakes moar quickly the next time around.
Fortunately, I did. Doesn’t make it feel better, but I am kinda proud I didn’t let it almost kill me this time.
–
Hockey Girls
Last year, I almost blew it. I waited and waited and waited. And I almost waited too long.
This year, we’re doing it early. The opening round of the Stanley Cup Playoffs has just begun. No procrastinating this year.
I love hockey. I didn’t watch as much of it this season as I would have liked. But the playoffs are here and it’s time to overdose on it…. now that it’s 80° outside. SMGDH. But still…
Sexy Hockey Girls!!!!!!!!
Woooooo!!!!!!!
I’m going to try my best not to repeat any from last year. But no promises because some of them were pretty damned hot. Let’s see what happens.
Enjoy….
My thoughts exactly, Noob Noob.
I think my ice is melting.
–
Yeah I Know
A lot of you are gonna hate me for this one. But I’m doing it anyway.
Yes I feel kinda dirty now. But I’m also giggling my ass off.
Which is better than last night when I wanted to drive to our nation’s capital and murderize Evgeny Kuznetsov. Fucking idiot. I hope you silly DC Russians still like spring golf. You’ll get to the course earlier this year apparently.
Have a great weekend everyone.
Love ya’s!!!
(except for you stinking Yinzers)
Grumble, Grumble.
–
Good for the Wild to get that crucial away goal.
Today:
“Great story; glad you made it so detailed.”
Nice Jeans.
Yankees up 8-3 in the 8th on the Tigers. Betances comes in.
Yankees up 8-4 on the Tigers.
I presume he beaned a guy so hard that they gave him home?
Good guess, but the other one.
Nope. Fastball right down the middle. Landed 444′ away.
I like Betances but I don’t think he’s suited to New York. He’d probably thrive in an environment where they don’t draw crowds and don’t really expect to win.
The Orioles come to mind.
(It is now 8-4, one out and men on 2nd and 3rd)
Nah, we like guys who don’t try to kill batters just because Sanchez eggs them on.
Other than Darren O’Day trying to kill Joey Bats. We’re OK with that.
I seriously doubt Betances was trying to his that guy in the head.
Mostly because he hit the guy in the head.
(It is now 8-5, 1st and 3rd)
(it’s like watching a slow-motion train wreck)
I might agree if Sanchez didn’t obviously know where the pitch was going, and didn’t laugh about it later.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmacVhZObuk
Ice Bombers giving Ice Vikings a good pegging.
Here comes the damage report. Remember when congress had to get involved before you could just fire rockets and bombs? Good times.
Today was wall-to-wall devastation for Trump on cable news. A half dozen MAJOR STORES all jammed in the hopper at once. And now? POOF!
Like a goddamn magic trick, it’s all gone. Did Nixon ever politicize military strikes? This is horrendous.
When was the last time Congress signed off on war? Nam?
Actually declared war? World War 2.
Nixon only had one ongoing military conflict miasma in the name of “freedom” to distract with
Clinton did the same thing.
Got damn!
Well stated.
Holy shit.
RUH ROH.
SHHHH!
I didn’t see anything.
– Trump’s bodyguard
Fixed???
I liked the first one better fwiw.
Yeah, the kids in the background kinda ruin stuff
Glitch in the Matrix! Free the boobies!
Nicey hineys and surfboards. I’ll +1 that.
Sgt. Slaughter
Gallagher really let himself go.
WTF Hippo? This is the only Hot Chip song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRWMmU89FrU
see, I just don’t dig that one
How are the SOG 41-15 Ice Bombers? Damn Ice Vikes.
Feelin’ extra hipster!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-KRhxYaVXE
side boob is bestest boob ,, ppl forget/underappreciate that
Hey, once you guys get sick of hoc-key, the Coachella livestream is available on YouTube. War on Drugs is playing at 8:30 Pacific (followed by St Vincent).
For you can’t sleep guys, Jamiroquai is playing at 11:45 Pacific. About a 50% chance I’ll check that out.
Did you enjoy the Walmart yodeling kid?
DAMMIT. Missed that.
If I’m up that late it’s probably cause I’m walking on the ceiling…
Perfect. Just like Jamiroquai’s “Virtual Insanity” video.
And then I’d [Error, could not find second popular Jamiroquai song for joke]!
Drinking one of these:
Not going to say I’d stand in line for one, (like I just did for a case of Treehouse), (BFC turns green with envy)(I drink Treehouse Green), but it’s better than I expected for a blonde ale fermented with raspberries.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9S0ONyRctyE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvFLkCTUPx4
Hey guys!!!!! Guys!!!!! Look, tWBS really doesn’t have the shittiest musical tastes amongst us!!!!!
gonna listen to music, do some drawing and go to bed.
last funny:
Seeing the references below to Warren Harding and is almost-as-corrupt-as-the-current-administration-but-not-quite-administration. There’s a good biography of him called ‘The Shadow of Blooming Grove’ by Francis Russell. Well worth a read if we’re not all incinerated next week. Good quote attributed to Harding when asked about his enemies, “I can handle my enemies. It’s my friends; my goddamn friends!” that were causing all his problems.
He would have been big on the twitter-dot-com
“We’ll have the best teapots, the best domes, the best kitchen cabinets.”
WHEW, the #BFIB hold on, I noe you were all worried sick.
“Oh thank God”, said no one.
ah’m tellin’ Internet Dad.
Oh yeah, like he’s ever coming back from his “cigarettes and milk” errand.
What a surprise, the shot by Copp doesn’t get reviewed.
FLYERA, but alas time to rejoin the reality of my country being fucking terrible whenever there’s brown people we think we can get away with bombing
/Googles Selective Service age
Just need to make it to November before a draft!
I think I may have gotten this from one of you assholes, but fuck it, I’m going with it anyway.
What’s the difference between the Montreal Canadiens and The Titanic?
One’s old, rusty, and on the bottom of the Atlantic, and the other’s a fucking boat.
Laine-Stastny-Scheifele are all on the same line? Pray for Wild.
pour one out for Dez
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDKO6XYXioc
folks
Flocks.
I hate to break this to our buddy-guy Litre, but Minny-SEW-ta gon’ win 2-1. Not sure if regulation or OT yet.
Jesus fuck what are you doing
“Just hangin”
workin them delts, bruh
“My wrists and ankles hurt a little bit tho. What’s that all about?”
Screwing around again?
/close enough, who am I, McMaster Carr?
-Aaron Hernandez
/Quickly pulls up boxers
“NUTHIN’!”
HEY! YOUR MOM CAME ON TO ME!
I’m mean, “Nothing much. What’s up?”
So how does one go about re-tasking one of ‘dem missiles toward CenturyLink headquarters?
/asking foar a friend.
Fart in their lobby and report a chemical weapon attack.
better add that you saw a surly brown person
Yeah, Assad should die a violent horrible death, but this feels a little more “distraction-y” than “for the right reasons-y”
Maybe because Trump’s an asshole? Yeah, that’s probably it.
you mean stuff like this?
https://talkingpointsmemo.com/muckraker/mcclatchy-mueller-has-evidence-cohen-traveled-to-prague-during-campaign
Yes, like that.
Or even, exactly that.
This is your Standard Distraction Play from Bill Clinton’s playbook. He did the same thing when the Lewinsky thing was heating up in the late 90s.
But the one difference is at least I can defend what Clinton did. Clinton just landed “Air Force One” in unfamiliar territory and lied about it when caught.
Trump is making James Buchanan no longer the worst President and the Grant and Harding Administrations no longer in a race for Most Corrupt Administration.
Harding was always the trajectory, I think. This was inevitable.
endless round of “hold mah beer?”
Trump has certainly done a great job making BillyBob look decent/respectable and Dubya competent by comparison. And fuck me, that’s sayin’ sommet.
The jokes they will tell next time they have a funeral to go to. Obama: “And folks thought they had it bad having to answer to a n…”
Dubya was too simple to be President. He wasn’t a idiot; he was just too average.
The worst thing to happen to him is 9/11. Without him trying to be a War President, he would’ve been an above average President and the Republican Party wouldn’t be in the Shit Storm it is now. It’ll still be a Shit Storm, just a lower intensity.
Nah, George’s hands-off approach would have still gotten us Katrina and the subprime crisis. And even without 9/11 the neocons would still have found a way to pitch a Mideast war to him that he’d have been on board with. He’d have been a lousy president, but certainly nowhere near as bad as he ended up being.
You’re assuming he would’ve been reelected in ’04. Without the terrorists to scare votes, he wouldn’t have gotten the undecideds, and the Dems, still Blood Vengeancing from the ’00 thing, would’ve been out in force. So a Democrat would’ve won.
Which means Katrina would’ve happened on a Dems watch, and if the ’08 crisis happened again, a Republican might’ve won in ’08.
then maybe Obama wins in 2016 instead, and we are spared this existential white trash reality freak show we gots going on right now?
FAIR ENOUGH.
Yeah. Obama would’ve won on ’12 or ’16…if he was still Obama.
The kicker would be if he made his speech in ’04 where he got noticed. At that moment, the nation was divided with the war. Without the war, how would the nation be and would that affect his speech.
I argue he was less-bad than Reagan. That makes for fun conversations.
(And of course, that’s not a compliment toward Dubya)
I have a feeling he’d be the Republican version of Bill Clinton: Liberal/Conservative, but not Too Liberal/Conservative that it scares people away.
As far as worst presidents go, people tend to underestimate Buchanan, and I don’t know why.
People forget about him because he’s in the 19th Century. But yeah, if on your watch a handful of states go “Screw you, we’re out!” that’s at least pencils you into the Worst 3.
Let’s not forget that Andrew Johnson fucked up Reconstruction so badly that the CSA won the peace and took over this stupid fucking country.
The upside is that Britain and France are on board. That reassures me, a little.
Sure, this is kinda legit. Except Trump makes everything horrible.
But you’re right, with UK/France with us, the action itself is ok (shudders)
especially France. You can bully the Brits into going along, often times. The French think shit through.
Hockey is good again
Do the Flyers think this series will be decided on aggregate?
Important to get some crucial away goals tonite, true!
Welp, we’re bombing again.
*bombed
don’t be hasty, he may have re-joined ISIS!
Not like we weren’t doing it already. Now we’re just announcing it
– Nickelback
The Cincinnati Reds are on their way to a 2-11 start (0.153).
The Live Ball Record is the 1916 Philadelphia Athletics (36-117 0.235).
The Dead Ball Record is the 1890 Pittsburg Alleganys (23-113 0.169).
Come on, Redlegs! You can do it!
No love for the 1899 Cleveland Spiders? (20-134, .130 percentage)
Apparently they were so bad, that they have been stricken from the virtual history books!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_worst_Major_League_Baseball_season_records
making me a little twitchy tonight. Too close FOAR comfort now.
Criminy
Well, my parents and I split two bottles of wine at dinner. They left half a bottle before they had to go to a play, so I’m sitting here drinking that by myself until I meet up with a friend from high school. This night is going to be a disaster.
hey, just be happy you have parents who support your alcoholism ,, smh
They would have preferred I joined them at the theater, but as Cuntler always says, Fuck Ibsen
On the plus side, if you get some sex, it’ll be cuz your mom got you drunk.
So I have a slight problem. Recently due to channel surfing and nothing else being on TV, I’ve gotten into the Disney cartoon “Star vs. the Forces of Evil”. Its silly and goofy, but the story is pretty good for the channel its on. It actually deals with racism and learning about unpleasant parts of history in a way that that’s not bashing you over the head with it.
So I went searching for the voice actors, because the voice acting is great and I wanted to know who performed them. The problem is the voice of the character that is introduced in Season 3 as the season’s villain Eclipsa (a fallen Queen who betrayed her kingdom to monsters and dark magic) is voiced by Esme Bianco.
A quick search reveals that Bianco was in “Game of Thrones” as Ros (in several sex scenes), who is also in Neo-Burlesque, and is proud of her body.
Its quite hard it is to focus on the story when I hear Eclipsa’s voice and my imagination goes its NSFW mental folder. Maybe I should rephrase that third word.
She’s 35. You’re fine. Roy Moore, on the other hand, would be greatly disappointed.
No, he’d be disappointed that the 13-year old “Magical Princess from Another Dimension” is played by a 26-year old.
Don’t google the actress who playes Shae
I watch that show when my daughter has it on. No Spongebob when it comes to sly adult references, (“top that, Pinky”, being a personaly favorite), but surprisingly watchable.
We’ve replaced Brian Elliott with circa-2000 Martin Brodeur. Let’s see if anyone notices.
Flyers goaltending had never been bad per se. it just redefines inconsistent so you can’t ever count on it OR count it out
found a funny:
One of the worst personality types is “competitive at karaoke.”
counterpoint
I just got an email from CenturyLink.
They’ll be here on….
Tuesday. Fucking Tuesday. Four fucking days from now. And….between 8am and 5pm. Wow, way to fucking narrow it down.
Yes, I want to call them back. But right now, I’d rather watch hockey.
Fucking assholes.
No one needs internet, right?
Back in my day, we had to get our porn from a magazine at a Gas Station in a neighborhood we don’t live in. That’s right. Awkward Human Contact!
Better than Spectrum. It took them two times to fix the problem.
1st guy was in his 20s, personable, polite who had nothing but good things to say about Spectrum.
2nd guy was in his 40s, realized the 1st guy didn’t do shit, found the problem, and stayed 2 hours to upgrade all my plugs, all the while bitching about Spectrum.
Moral of the story. Always go for the older guy with the short attitude. He knows what he’s doing.
Don’t even get me started on Spectrum. Next time one of them accosts me at Walmart, I might punch them.
(the following happens repeatedly, btw)
Spectrum Dude: Hello Sir, may I ask who you have your phone and ISP with?
Me: CentruryLink.
Dude: Well have you ever thought of….
Me: Yes. I’d love to switch to you guys. But since there are only about a half a dozen houses on our road your company has decided it’s not economically feasible to run a line from the main road down our road.
Dude: Well we’re always expanding our service to provide a wider area of coverage. Why don’t you tell me your address and….
Me: Fine. This is my address….
Dude: [typey typey] Well, it looks like we don’t have service on your road and….
Me: WHAT DID I JUST FUCKING SAY???????
(Moral of the story….don’t ever move to the fucking sticks of North Carolina)
I just give my address and ask him to stop by:
3800 Struble Road
Cincinnati, OH 45251
Geno 1000% doesn’t want piece of Wayne
I love that a deputy finance chairman of the RNC was discovered to have spent $1.6 million to keep a Playmate quiet about their affair and her abortion LESS THAN TWELVE HOURS AGO and nobody’s even talking about it anymore because of all the other crazy shit that happened.
So… Friday?
Bahahahaha….
Think his wife knows about this?
CenturyLink can still burn in hell, fwiw.
Tech: We’re showing that your line is unstable.
Me: Yeah, no shit. Not the first time I’ve heard that. I’ve been hearing that for months. Then….you ran a temp line, and it made the problem worse. Then….you trenched a new permanent line. It made the problem worse. Then I was told it was probably our outdated modem so I paid you $100 for a new one. Oh big surprise….IT MADE THE PROBLEM WORSE!!!!!!!
Tech: Well Sir, CenturyLink doesn’t want you to be unsatisfied with our service.
Me: First…the word is “dissatisfied”. Second, why don’t you prove it by fixing the problem? Your company is bad at its job!!!!!!
Tech: Well…
Me: Why don’t you ever seem to have problems when it comes to processing payments? You’re really goddamned good at that.
Tech: Well…
Me: You better fix this and you better sure as shit credit that $100 back to my account. I’ve had it with you jackholes. HughesNet can’t be any worse. You got one last shot to fix this shit.
Click
We should have a recurring series of TWBS’ Customer Service Experiences.
Seconded!
I’m willing.
Though it might make me appear more stabby than people already think I am.
This just in: HughesNet acquired by CenturyLink; tWBS makes large fertilizer purchase.
Every goddamn shot the pens take looks like it’s going in. I hate this
Bears are godless killing machines, ppl forget that.
http://www.cc.com/video-clips/z8f9f5/the-colbert-report-exclusive—godless-killing-machines
Oilers gal was the bestest. Go Canadia and #BFIB!
She’s lovely, yes. But….counterpoint:
Looking forward to the 43 consecutive makeup calls the pens get after that bad call let to a goal