Your “Feed Me (Richard) Seymour!” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL Noise:

• It’s mostly coaching news today:
  • It was, according to PFT, “Love at first sight” between Jerry Jones & Mike McCarthy.
    • BTW – worst Marvel pairing since Sue Storm & Matt Murdock.
  • The Panthers are hiring Baylor’s Matt Rhule as their new coach.
    • It’s a seven-year, $60 million deal, which doesn’t include the additional $6 million to get Rhule out of the last year of his Baylor contract.
  • Right after that was announced, the Giants announced their hiring of Patriots assistant Joe Judge as head coach.
    • He turned down an offer to take the head coaching position at his alma mater, Mississippi State, to take on the Giants job instead.
  • Wade Phillips – available!

In amongst all the fun of the Sunday games & the tale of my possible hobo-murder, we forgot to take a moment to really savour the fact that the Patriots lost on Saturday & are out of this year’s playoffs.

Breathe deep the air of freedom.

And, let’s check in on how the hard-done-bys in Patriots Nation are taking things in a flashback to a segment I used to call, “Hope Clicks Eternal“.

First off – Patriots twitter.

Final score. pic.twitter.com/wXfXOPrxTv

— New England Patriots (@Patriots) January 5, 2020

I thought I’d just look at the game score page, because the rest is unfiltered “we’ll be back” nonsense I don’t need because I’m here for the pain! So, let’s see what’s up –

Okay, that’s a good start. But where’s the rage & irrational pain I’ve come to expect from Patriots fans?

I didn’t come here for the glib. I came for the misery & wallowing in self-pity.

There we go. The combined delusional rage that only a Pats fan can muster – switching to Jacksonville because of one loss, and that the coach threw the season to get rid of his QB.

But I need a little more – perhaps an over-the-top reference to dramatic closure?

And what, pray tell, is the appropriate reaction to such histrionics?

As for the rest of Boston, there’s the glib,

and the desperate to move on. So let us check in on those impartial fair & balanced folks over at WEEI. Thank God they have the Red Sox to lo–

Oh my. Looks like a Patriots-esque controversy and an adjacent Maple Leaf Gardens scandal just in time for training camp. A banner winter so far up in Mass’y.

To close out the look into WAT PASSES FOR DAHKNESS, someone decided that the result of the game all came down to the spouses.

In conclusion, I don’t know what we’ll do for this year’s [DFO] Hate Week during the Super Bowl lead-up with our usual target of ire gone, but I’m sure we’ll find something.

Tonight’s sports:

• NHL:
  • Avalanche at Rangers – 7:30PM | NBCSN / Sportsnet
  • Penguins at Vegas – 10:00PM | Sportsnet
• NBA:
  • Trail Blazers at Raptors – 7:00PM | TSN
  • Thunder at Nets – 7:30PM | NBATV
  • Knicks at Lakers – 10:30PM | NBATV
• NCAA: hoops
  • Ohio State at Maryland – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN3
  • Miami at Louisville – 7:00PM | ESPN2
  • Florida at South Carolina – 7:00PM | ESPNU
  • Providence at Marquette – 7:00PM | FS1
  • Kentucky at Georgia – 9:00PM | ESPN
  • Baylor at Texas Tech – 9:00PM | ESPN2
  • TCU at Kansas State – 9:00PM | ESPNU
  • Villanova at Creighton – 9:00PM | FS1

Tonight’s TV:

• Jeopardy – the GOAT tournament: Tuesday thru Friday – 8:00PM ET; PT / 7:00PM CT; MT
  • 9:00PM Calgary because you get Spokane TV

Perhaps our own [DFO] Jeopardy contestants will chime in on their own experiences.