Your “Eve Of The Apocalypse” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL Nuggets:

  • Well, there’s finally proof that COVID can cross over to the animal kingdom, as Broncos GM & noted equine hybrid John Elway has tested positive for the disease.
    • Contact tracing appears to show the exposure came…from outside the building!
    • Since the team facility is closed for election day, there is minimal risk on on-site exposure.
    • The opening statement from KUSA in Denver on the topic is typical NBC hyperbole:

Coronavirus is so vexing, so heinous, so nondiscriminatory, it got two of the highest-ranking executives of the Denver Broncos.

    • Fortunately, Elway has gone into isolation protocol & is taking all necessary precautions, including mandatory face covering.

Trade deadline updates:

  • The Dolphins made the only moves today:
    • They traded wide receiver Isaiah Ford to the Patriots for undisclosed compensation.
    • They acquired running back DeAndre Washington from the Chiefs for an undisclosed draft pick.

Well, it’s Election Night, so that can only mean one thing,

I thought a clip from “The Purge: Election Night” might be too on the nose.

Living next door to Washington State, I get pretty full-up on their election news. Based on the coverage, Seattle is boarding itself up in advance of celebration/losing riots, and Vancouver, WA will put itself out long enough for the votes to be counted. In addition to their Governor’s race, they have six initiatives on the ballot:

  • Referendum 90 – the only fascinating one
    • To allow State Senate Bill 5395 to take effect, thereby requiring public schools to provide comprehensive sexual health education for all students and requiring students to be excused if requested by their parents.
      • It changes an existing law that allowed districts to choose whether or not to offer sexual health to requiring comprehensive sexual health that is consistent with state health standards and that requires affirmative consent curriculum.
        • In trying to oppose it, Republicans from the conservative parts of the state introduced over 100 amendments to try & stall it in committee, preventing it from reaching the Governor.
          • Parents for Safe Schools, the sponsors of Referendum 90, submitted 266,000 signatures to the Washington Secretary of State’s office to get the referendum put on the 2020 ballot. To qualify the referendum for the November ballot, 129,811 of the signatures had to be valid.
          • The more lucid public complaints sound like this:
            • It is highly sexualized going beyond anatomy, reproduction and pregnancy and HIV/STD prevention. CSE is built on the principals of Alfred Kinsey who believed that kids are sexual from birth, they have a right to seek out sexual pleasure and explore their sexuality, children have a right to advocate for their sexual rights and freedoms and parents are a barrier to obtaining those rights.
          • The bill passed 28-21 in the Senate and 56-40 in the House.
      • Apparently, there has never been a statewide curriculum in this area.
        • It was available district by district, and not in all schools in that district.
  • Four non-binding Advisory Votes on tax measures proposed by the state
    • The most controversial is #32, a vote to maintain or repeal State Senate Bill 5323, which was designed to levy a tax on certain carryout bags provided by retailers.
  • One Joint Resolution (a “Joint Resolution”, not a joint resolution, because ‘Washington mannnn…’)
    • To support or oppose allowing the Washington Legislature to invest the Long-Term Care Services and Supports Trust Account into stocks or other methods of investment.

That’s what’s up next door. What’s special on your home state’s ballot? Let’s have at it in the comments


Tonight’s sports:

  • MLB: Gold Glove Awards – 8:00PM | ESPN
  • 2020 CONCACAF League – Round of 16:
    • Tauro FC vs. Forge FC – 8:00PM | TSN3

C’mon – it’s the big politics nerd TV night. Even if the NHL & NBA were active, the NHL would be only Canadian games, and the NBA would be off. Tonight, we talk politics, and please be civil to those you think are wrong.

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Spur

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King Hippo

Man, some of these fuckadoos REALLY need better head shots to give media.

Duchess

News _____Biden/Trump
Fox News ___129/94
CNN ________89/54
MSNBC _____89/63
ABC news____89/63
Univision____119/92
WaPo_______80/63

Sharkbait

Encouraging…

The Maestro

Folks.

Spur

Alexi Mccammond, yes please comment image

Sharkbait

So far ranked choice losing in MA 55%-45%

Don’t be shitty Massachusetts.

Sharkbait

Edit.

Last edited 4 years ago by Sharkbait
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ok, it is past time I start drinking. Suggestions? Other than cyanide.

King Hippo

I’m totally not killing myself until Thursday or Friday, no matter how dicey the night gets. Ballot processing is going to vary wildly.

King Hippo

Still think this gets called for Diamond Joe by like 3-4a. But it is NOT happening super early. Damn it all to fuck. My liver did not need this.

/pill bottle STAYS open

scotchnaut

BBC is reporting “Close Race In Key States”.

King Hippo

Wisconsin is going to be reporting super late, it seems.

King Hippo

oh God, I don’t even want to imagine reading that again

Gratliff

That’s a funny thing to call a mass suicide note

Spur

down the rabbit hole

herodotus450

Sad to see my comments could still fit into a size 34 pant back then

Viva La Tabula Raza

Even though she was a lifelong Republican who switched sides, I’d also do Nicole Wallace once she let her dark brunette roots grow out.

Duchess

Kasie Hunt man here
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Duchess

Hallie Jacksoncomment image

SonOfSpam

SDKSDGFNRQFWOI

I mean, yes.

King Hippo

Holy cats. That is 100% what Hippo likes. I bet she has classy pepper spray, too.

Gratliff

Amy McGrath turning $100m into a 20 point loss.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Boyd Crowder not votin’ for no commie Democ-rat.

Gratliff

A lot of people really don’t appreciate how beloved long term senators are in their home states. Even the most corrupt, dishonest one (all of them) do everything in their power to cater to their benefactors and constituents.

King Hippo

Point to wit, Jesse Helms held on, in significant part, because his office was excellent at “constituent service” crap. Like if you needed a passport expedited.

Viva La Tabula Raza

“Mah nephew needs to go to West Point.”

King Hippo

EXACTLY. And his office would help Dems, even BLACK PPL that way.

Gratliff

We’ve reached the “stress eating breakfast cereal” portion of today’s events

scotchnaut

I’m betting that you’re eating Vote Count Chocula, btw

Viva La Tabula Raza

I’m having Quaker Oats Voatmeal, with cinnamon.

Sharkbait

Manhattan #2 is done. I should switch. Maybe gin.

Viva La Tabula Raza

comment image?resize=768%2C432

Duchess

News _____Biden/Trump
Fox News _129/94
CNN ______73/42
MSNBC ___80/48
ABC news__80/48
Univision___119/83
WaPo______80/48

Dunstan

So in other words, conservative media going with the quick count, in accordance with Trump’s announced strategy.

Duchess

think it more CNN is trying to milk it more

Redshirt

New Jersey has 14 elector votes?!

clint greasewood

Suburbs of NYC and Philadelphia will do it.

Spur

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herodotus450

In a shocking (ok not that shocking) turn of events, Mississippi has been voted out of the Union.

Sharkbait

If only.

litre_cola

Uhhh, guys, this isn’t going as swimmingly as I had thought.

Redshirt

Yup. This is way too close.

Spur

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Beastmode Ate My Baby

You thought the centrist, corporate-picked Biden was going to coast? This was always going to be an uphill fight for him.

Dunstan

And, who had 6:06 pm in the “Bernie woulda won” pool?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Not saying that, but Biden was never as strong as the media presented him.

Brick Meathook

Biden would have beat Trump in 2016. Hilary lost that election, and Sanders should just go away.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Fuck off, Brick. Seriously.

Brick Meathook

Sorry if the truth hurts. Seriously.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Again, fuck off. You have the political instincts of a spectacularly unintelligent sand crab, and I have no interest in your fucking opinions.

Brick Meathook

There’s only one uncivil person here.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Run to Slack to cry about it, you pathetic little whiner.

Last edited 4 years ago by Beastmode Ate My Baby
ballsofsteelandfury

Stop it

Viva La Tabula Raza

gentlemen, you can’t fight in here, it’s the war room!

ballsofsteelandfury

Drunken civility, please.

And just because you disagree with his opinion doesn’t give you the right to tell him to fuck off.

I happen to agree with him so you can tell me to fuck off or just kill me in the next episode of HRTN.

Recovery Whiskey

God damnit Bernie people. You can’t muster 25% of the electorate but you’re certain you were this untapped well of might if only those evil centrists hadnt of done you in.

Gratliff

To be clear, the moment any of us here of the DemSoc persuasion comment on any centrist shortcomings, we get dog-piled here, mostly due to a general disdain from the older types towards Sanders, due to the misconception that there’s some cult of personality with him. The same people who get mad when Sanders people don’t immediately start towing the party line when they drag Bernie out on camera to beg his supporters to vote for the Dem candidate. Sanders is doing work for Joe almost to the point of parody even as Biden laughs away most of his key platforms.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

And to be clear to the seemingly-deaf, I made no mention of Bernie. Only Biden’s own (considerable) shortcomings.

Dunstan

Yes, I am guilty of making the inference that you were a Bernie supporter suggesting that he would have done better than the “corporate picked centrist” Biden.

Am I wrong about that? Is that not your contention?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Nope. I don’t do prognostication, because too many factors come into play over too many months. But Biden was a poor choice from the get-go. The Dems need to go younger and they need a platform beyond “Not Trump.”

Dunstan

Well, then I apologize for my knee-jerk sarcasm.

For what it’s worth, I was a Warren supporter. But I’m fully on board with Biden now. If you can’t carry the Democratic primary electorate, then I don’t think you have much hope in the general. For better or worse, Biden is closer to the electoral pulse than I apparently am.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

I don’t think he is, though. Exit polling was indicating an enormous amount of support for M4A, for example. I think the DNC just picks the candidate they want, and that’s it. And what the DNC wants is not the same thing as what their voters want.

Last edited 4 years ago by Beastmode Ate My Baby
Dunstan

But do you really think that Cuban voters in Miami-Dade are going to flock to M4A? Or suburban voters in OH and PA? As far as I can tell, those voters are all worried about whether BIDEN is “too radical.”

Or do you subscribe to the “hidden voter” theory, that lots of people will flock to the polls if only the Dems distinguish themselves enough from the GOP? I don’t think much of that, either.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

So you don’t think the Dems should distinguish themselves from the GOP? They should of course do that.

But the M4A is an example of an overall (as opposed to electoral) trend. What the D’s need is a platform that resonates, and a key issue to focus on. Climate would be my choice, but legalized weed, M4A, free (or essentially so) college…pick something and put forward a strong argument.

Dunstan

Well of course I don’t subscribe to the Tweedledum/Tweedledee model. Of course Ds should be different from Rs. But if there’s too much space, a lot of swing voters (and they still exist) get scared.

Anyway, I’m dubious about your theory, but this thread is getting long, so I’ll just say “peace” and sorry for my part in sparking this fight.

King Hippo

TX is kaput. OH, GA, NC to watch

Sharkbait

Lame. Come on Ohio!

King Hippo

OH and NC will be very, very close. Within 2%

Dunstan

Yeah, sure looks that way. Thing about TX being “in play” is that a lot of GOP voters start to show up, too, who didn’t bother in prior years.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

GA will stay red, but the D’s really need to worry about Michigan right now.

Gratliff

Goddamn, Al Sharpton got old as shit

King Hippo

Like he got Original FlavoUr AIDS, or worse – went vegan

Spur

It’s go time for the Old Northwest

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5OSMqSPmfVA

King Hippo

very little in from Metro ATL, that is still possible

Duchess

JUST an FYI

News Biden/Trump
Fox News 91/73
CNN 30/42
MSNBC 51/48
ABC news 44/42

Dunstan

But nobody’s called FL, NC, GA, TX, or OH yet, correct?

Redshirt

Ohio is way too early. No way Biden is 10 points ahead of Trump.

Duchess

Fox News is doing a “live soft count” so right now they are counting states like Texas as Biden

ballsofsteelandfury

Univision also has high numbers like Fox

Spur

Access to top quality coke will do that

ballsofsteelandfury

85/72 on Univision

Redshirt

I just had a thought: What about Trump winning the Popular Vote but losing the Electoral College?

Dunstan

Possible but unlikely. Though it could look that way tonight/tomorrow morning before all the California numbers come in.

Dunstan

And by “possible” I mean “highly unlikely but theoretically possible.”

Dunstan

51-48 now. I think that’s Scorigami.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I’m a weird old guy, but I like brunettes and I would definitely do Flo from Progressive. Go ahead, flame me.

litre_cola

Oh absolutely.

Dunstan

I was watching an “old” (like 15 years ago) film and was surprised to see her. Young Flo, without the heavy makeup, was borderline hot.

herodotus450

At(&t) the very least she opened the door for well endowed brunette commercial spokeswomen everywhere to bu lusted after.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Yeah, that Lily is righteous. Probably too young for me to keep up with, though.

ballsofsteelandfury

Buy a wand and you don’t need to worry about that.

Spur

A Tar Heel win for Biden would be Excellent news.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I’ve got all my digits and my testicles crossed.

Sharkbait

Careful with that last bit.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=slobhI2HXhA

TheRevanchist

Yes, do not cross the streams.

King Hippo

The bad story is how much of the Hispanic portion of the coalition seems to be crumbling. No me gusta.

But I do think this looks like a Diamond Joe win.

SonOfSpam

I think FL is toast. Cuban shit toast.

But I like all other news so far.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Having spent a half-century in South Texas, I think I can say that Mexican-Americans hate Cubans.

Spur

They think their shit don’t stink.

Viva La Tabula Raza

They think they are gringos, not vatos. Biscuits/bolillos.

Last edited 4 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
Spur

Crap it’s not even 6pm yet. Am making a drink

Viva La Tabula Raza

Shit, I’m almost out already! Plenty of backup, though.

Redshirt

CNN is trying to say it too early. What is MSNBC and Fox News saying?

Spur

Kill Kill Kill The White man.

Spur
SonOfSpam

Fox News is saying HURR DURR HERP DERP ANTIFA

Dunstan

MSNBC saying FL looking Trumpish, TX slightly so, but NC promising for Biden.

But yeah, everything is too early.

Viva La Tabula Raza

MSNBC saying a lot of too early. Guess everyone is still gun-shy after 2000.

scotchnaut

Not sure about what MSNBC and Fox News are saying about the election but BBC is saying, “I think you have me confused with someone else”.

King Hippo

I am…feeling 80% confident in North Cakalaky. Unlike FL, that would not be “game over” – but then Herr Fuhrer needs ALL of PA/MI/WI. Extremely unlikely.

SonOfSpam

Biden has MI/WI easily and PA not quite as easily

King Hippo

NC plus MI/WI would suffice

SonOfSpam

And we gonna get AZ fuck the haters and questionable polls.

King Hippo

the Hispanic voter issues make me waaaayyyyy less confident re AZ than I was.

Spur

Cubans are weirdos

King Hippo

but Bexar County was also a groan-inducer. Goes beyond Cubans.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Disturbing thing I saw—no one has won the presidency without FLA since 19 twenty fucking four.

herodotus450

My 12 dollars is tied up in Jack O Lanterns still, but I’m sure if we all pitch in we can get Spur a new shower curtain
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TheRevanchist

Start the GoFundMe and we will see who bites

Viva La Tabula Raza

Not a gamblor guy, but I bet we get more comments here tonight than we did for the P*ts-Rams SB.

Redshirt

Come on America! Do it for Democracy! Do it freedom!! Do it for Batman!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4XIAjNuHPg

scotchnaut

BBC is calling North Calacky 54% for Sir Diamond of Joe.

King Hippo

It will narrow, but I think he holds on.

Viva La Tabula Raza

MSNBC has Biden up 53-46 (7:39 CST).

Spur

Am going get back in shape. I only need to lose 30 pounds or so. Am debt free. I have no kids.

Am going on a pussy parade to rival Aaron Rodgers.

SonOfSpam

Atta boy.

Spur

If I bag me an Olivia Munn, am not leaving the house.

SonOfSpam

And I will be joining your house, as cameraman if nothing else.

herodotus450
King Hippo

Tell him it don’t get no better.

Spur

Shots when Cali blues it self.

SonOfSpam

Cali will be called approx half a second after polls close.

King Hippo

Both HippoLyf counties (childhood Mecklenburg, adulthood Wake) have done a good.

Redshirt

The Redshirt household has been called, sadly for Trump.

Trump: 2
Biden: 1
Abstention (Fuck Both of these Assholes): 1

herodotus450

(starts emptying gasoline can around the house)
I didn’t want to do it, but I feel I owe it to you.

SonOfSpam

You’re doing the right thing.

Redshirt

“DON’T DO IT! DON’T DO IT!”

(grabs grandpa and great-grandma sentimental heirlooms, $25,000 ring and Xbox)

“NOW DO IT!”

Dunstan

Abstention is, of course, quite principled, because as well all know, if a majority of the country refuses to vote, the presidency is declared vacant.

(Yes, I know Nevada actually has a rule like that for state races. They’re weird.)

King Hippo

The early/ED vote calculus has changed the way the maths flows.

Sharkbait

In a good way?

*He askes hopefully, but knowing full well he is wrong

King Hippo

In a “hard to tell how good the NC numbers are” way.

Redshirt

Damn it! Trump’s up by a touchdown! Where was the defense Dems?!

Senor Weaselo

GIO GOT ROBBED.
/Goes back to presidential mode

Dunstan

Well, my bottle of tonic water is running out, so time to go to the bullpen.

Fortunately, I have lemon juice and egg whites in the fridge, so it’s time to bring in whiskey sour for an inning or two

King Hippo

North Cakalaky apparently is hitting benchmarks. Probably a bit more blue than GA.

herodotus450

West Virgina called for Trump. Looks like WCS’s 12 Vietnam veteran children’s votes weren’t enough.

Spur

Which Canucks house can the DFO diaspora crash at?

scotchnaut

I’ve got a rich Corinthian leather couch with your name on it.

Spur

Sweet. i can finally call myself a Fugee

SonOfSpam

Two times

scotchnaut

“Why is this young country voting between two 70 year olds?”

-BBC coverage

herodotus450

“Yes they could go a whole lot younger.”
-Caller to BBC from “Muckingham Balace”

herodotus450

Not sure if irony exists anymore, but it’d be pretty funny if Trump files enough lawsuits to get enough votes thrown out that Biden loses the national popular vote but still wins the electoral vote.