Here’s another UConn story.

My brother is dating a different girl. Ted’s is again in the picture. At the time, (but not now), there is a frat house across from Ted’s. One of the frat guys is talking to my brother’s then, (and different), gf, and when they shake hands, he stuffs her hands into the front of his pants.

As one does.

Well, she leaves in a huff, (as one does), and makes the questionable decision to tell my brother, who has been drinking, about what happened.

My brother leaves the bar, goes across the street, finds the guy outside the frat, grabs him by the collar with one hand and punches him repeatedly with the other.

If you, like me, occasionally doubt the existence of a just and benevolent God, allow me to introduce Mike. Mike is a friend of mine from UConn Law, another UConn undergrad alumnus, a former bouncer and former college wrestler. Through whatever stroke of Fate, he happens to be strolling from Husky’s to Ted’s at this literal exact second, sees what’s happening, and recognizes my brother.

The rest of the frat comes out with the intention of beating up my brother, whereupon Mike suggests, strongly, that he will get involved if they do. Brotherhood apparently only extends as far as “angry large former wrestler/bouncer” and the brotherhood retreats, letting their brother get smacked to bejesus, until Mike persuades my brother to stop hitting the guy.

Mike tells me all this the next day during classes and, by sheer coincidence, I assure you< we decide to head to Storrs that night.

At Storrs we’re drinking in Husky’s, next door to Ted’s. We have three guys with us, and I, (remember, 6’1″ 200 or so lbs), am the smallest.

/Enter Leuba

Leuba had apparently been with Mike the night before, and was in no doubt a large part of the reason that the frat had retreated. Leuba is not a small man.

“Hey, Mike”, says Leuba, “that dude we saw fighting last night is in Ted’s and there’s like 8 frat guys in there looking to kick his ass.”

/Our group exits Husky’s
//Our groups consists of me, Mike, Leuba, Darren, (a 6’4″ black guy who may as well have been carved from marble, and who knew Mike and had played Little League with me, (it it a small world we live in, people, be kind to everyone you meet), ad two undergrad friends of mine who were pretty sure they were about to get expelled, but what are you going to do?
///Our group enters Ted’s

My brother is seated at a table with his gf and one other guy, working on a pitcher. They are, no shit, surrounded by 5-6 guys from the frat across the street, just standing there as though they are timing his finishing the pitcher with when they will attack.

Which they almost certainly would not have, not matter what happened next.

What actually does happen next is me crashing through their little circle, grabbing my brother by the shoulders and saying “Hey bro, what’s up!?” while my little group from Husky’s closes ranks around the frat guys. My brother starts laughing his ass off, the frat beats a hasty retreat, and no one had to go to jail.

The lesson here, kids, is that there is strength in numbers and size, and that if you shove a girl’s hand down your pants without her consent, for any reason, you probably deserve what’s coming to you.

I’ve been drinking at a baby shower all night, (unravel the paradox as you have been taught), but it seems to me that this UConn game is exactly what you should expect from a young team with one semi-superstar (I am not convinced James Bouknight is going to be much of an NBA player) in their first tournament in years.

Like their future, enjoyed this season, had Alabama coming out of this section anyway.