Sexy Friday, Mid-October 2021 edition

This week, I have no Balls’ Thoughts O’ Da Week as my brain is completely fried. I just want to chill and relax with a certain someone and block out the rest of the world. The song selections this week will help greatly with that. Enjoy!

***

For those of you prudes that don’t like cheesecake or beefcake, click HERE to skip to the music videos.

Here are your Top 11 pictures of the week.

h/t Horatio
h/t Horatio
h/t Horatio
h/t Horatio
h/t Horatio
h/t Mr. Ayo (Balls’ Pic O’ Da Week!)
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Mr. Ayo

***

YOU’RE-A-PRUDE

***

And now, for the music!

As I mentioned before, I’ve decided that I must take up the mantle that tWBS ran with and help to make this world a better place. I will do this in the one way he couldn’t: By introducing you to good music!

This week, I’m playing six songs that I believe are best heard in the dark in the arms of a loved one. Preferably naked. Enjoy!

Song Number One:

Portishead – Sour Times

Canción Número Dos:

Thievery Corporation – Nos Dois

Chanson Numéro Trois:

Massive Attack – Teardrop

Canzone numero quattro:

Röyksopp – What Else Is There?

Canção número cinco

DJ Shadow – Midnight in a Perfect World

Seigarren zenbakia:

The xx – Angels

***

That’s all for this week, folks! Be good to each other and fly low and avoid the radar.

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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rockingdog

Last funny;

here’s the trick to shower oatmeal, and it’s not complex. U get out the oats and throw some in your hand like ur a fuckin horse. Now enter the shower. steam and waters will do the rest

Doktor Zymm

I bet more angels can dance on the head of a pin nowadays than back in olden times because we can bop in place and it’s considered a dance, while they had to skip around a maypole or do a waltz or some other spatially inefficient shit

Horatio Cornblower

True, but then God probably laid off a bunch of angels and told the rest to “work smarter, not harder”, so it’s the same number of dancing angels, they’re just doing more “efficient” dancing.

Also they’re illegal immigrants from Purgatory, but that’s a whole different story.

Doktor Zymm

I kinda dig the idea of old-school Catholics selling indulgences as sketchy coyotes that might well abandon you half-way along Dante’s journey

SonOfSpam

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Doktor Zymm
SonOfSpam

Good to know, will try that. I think I’ve had maybe the Chardonnay from them?

Doktor Zymm

No idea if you had their Chardonnay, but if you did, hooray!
They have a sweet garden in an industrial park just outside downtown Healdsburg, and apparently the grandmother of one of the owners is pictured in the logo, and that’s how they came to have it as the logo, which is pretty awesome

2Pack

They all “jump around” like the Badger fans. Man I cant wait for that stupid thing to get old and die. Might be cute if you are 6-0… but 3-3… not so much.

scotchnaut

Sillycuse coach Dino Babers is a nutless coward-dog.

SonOfSpam

Plus he always sticks his head through Fred’s roof.

Gumbygirl

.

dino_0.jpg
WCS

Oh, shit. Dabo is secretly a SHANK’LOR worshipper.

Gumbygirl

This flu shot is kicking my ass, wow.

Horatio Cornblower

This is why I don’t get vaccine for any reason whatever.

Now, if someone could turn my iron lung so’s I can see the TV, that’d be great.

SonOfSpam

Mine had no effect whatsoever.

Probably got the placebo.

Doktor Zymm

A friend of mine’s sister actually did get a saline shot instead of a covid vax. She didn’t have any side effects and joked that it must not have been the vaccine, but then it turned out she got vaxxed by this horrible person and she got a phone call that she needed to do a redo: https://www.cnn.com/2021/08/11/europe/german-nurse-saline-solution-vaccine-scli-intl-grm/index.html

Horatio Cornblower

Holy Schiesse!

SonOfSpam

That’s really fucked up, glad it was caught.

Doktor Zymm

Agreed, too bad it wasn’t earlier though, 8600 people is quite a few

Anthony In TX

My coworker got it Wednesday and had to take Thursday off.
Well, technically he came in to work and was sweaty and seemed like he was in a fog. We sent him home. He’s fine today, but he was in rough shape yesterday.

scotchnaut

I don’t trust Sillycuse qb at all.

rockingdog

Found a funny;

*Liam Neeson in Taken voice* Just circling back about my daughter

SonOfSpam

We’re all rooting for not-Clemson right?

Horatio Cornblower

I’ll root for a Syracuse team not coached by Jim Boeheim, sure.

SonOfSpam

Fair.

King Hippo

Boeheim’s boogers have a better understanding of clock management than this Babers cat.

Brocky

Wtf Clemson is unranked.

I did not know.

Somehow this is notre dame’s fault

SonOfSpam

“Probably”

-ghost of the guy who fell off the scissor-lift

Horatio Cornblower

So you’re telling me UConn has a chance?
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Brocky

How the casual mlb fan feels about the playoffs
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King Hippo

SillyCuse to get the ball back, down 3…

rockingdog

Update;

LoL
There’s some mid-40s year old lady
Here at the bar ripped off her face
Cheering for the pitcher cause she recognizes him.
It’s Rocking!

Last edited 3 years ago by rockingdog
Doktor Zymm

#lifegoals

Anthony In TX

Get in there, buddy. She knows stuff that’ll blow your mind.

rockingdog

Update;

JPN guys are gone.
They were cool 😎
Bar is still ROCKIN!
Goooo Sox!

Brocky

Also, evening
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Wait, Bruce Allen is the brother of former Senator George Allen? The “macaca” guy? Holy shit that explains so very much.

King Hippo

Oh yes indeed. George Allen did a great jerb raising some fuckhead sons.

SonOfSpam

I mean, he let Nixon design a play for him.

Horatio Cornblower

“here’s the ‘A’ gap, here’s the ‘B’ gap, here’s the 18 1/2 minute gap…”

SonOfSpam

“If the President does it, it’s a first down!”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That’s enough basedball for me until the Cubs are relevant again.

rockingdog

Update;

No sign of OCG
Sitting next to two Japanese dudes
Both rooting for the Sox
What drink do I get em?

litre_cola

Fernet. Fernet is always an introductory libation.

Doktor Zymm

Only if they’re bartenders

litre_cola

oh. waves!

Horatio Cornblower

What are the odds that place has Kirin beer?

Doktor Zymm

Whisky shots. 100%

scotchnaut

/Clemson only up 7 on Sillycuse

Dabo: [yells at his players in Christian]

Senor Weaselo

Enrique Hernandez is really making it easy for Houstonian neo-Nazis to spout out their beliefs.

Game Time Decision

Holy fuck, Portishead, I’d forgotten about them. Great song

Brocky

Is it weird i kinda dont give a shit that the Astros being cheaters? Like the other teams are that annoying?

King Hippo

right there with ya, I am having MOAR issues with the Dusty Baker aspect

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No more weird than believing that the NFL didn’t find anything else worth sharing with the public during their investigation of Dan Snyder’s human trafficking organization I mean football team.

Doktor Zymm

At least they were kinda good at being cheaters, that must be worth something. I mean, look at Trump, he tried all sorts of cheating and still didn’t win, at least they aren’t that sad and pathetic!

Anthony In TX

Here’s the casual Astros fan take:

Yes, they cheated. That was shitty and awful and they shouldn’t have done it.
They 1,000,000% were not the only ones who cheated, they just got ratted out first. There’s a non-zero chance that they weren’t even the worst perpetrators.
BUT.
They still had to hit the ball–well. They still had to pitch. They still had to play defense. Cheating really only helps one aspect of that.
My mild conspiracy theory was MLB told the Astros they’d be able to keep their title if they’d allow themselves to be sacrificed at the altar of PR in an effort to keep other teams’ cheating under wraps.
I understand why people hate them and don’t begrudge anyone their hate. I just find it *really* hard to believe that out of 30 (?) baseball teams, it was only the Astros and a little bit the Red Sox who cheated? Come on.

They’re still my hometown team and I’ll root for them, even if I’m just a casual baseball fan.

Horatio Cornblower

Wait until I tell you about the Brewers!

Horatio Cornblower

They cheated at pitching, too. The Astros were the ones who came up with the Spider tack stuff on the hands first. It’s why Verlander’s career took off when he came over from Detroit, and Cole’s when he came from Pittsburgh.

All teams steal signals, and I have no problem if the players are doing it themselves on the field or even from the dugout if they can pick something up. The Astros were using video from non-players and relaying it, through players in the dugout, to the hitters. Cora, currently managing the Red Sox, was apparently the brains of the operation.

What’s more, the Astros, (primarily Correa), have gone full heel, claiming that no one knows the full story, while at the same time refusing to disclose what they knew, or what they did. So when everyone, (correctly), shits on them as the devious, beady-eyed cheaters that they are, they cry and whine “unfair” and point to other teams while never providing any actual proof.

And no, I don’t find it hard to believe that Cora’s teams were the only ones doing it. The Red Sox are a legacy team with a huge, if ill-bred, uneducated, and poorly washed following, and the Astros were an exciting team filled with young, (and largely Latin/Hispanic) players in, and I can’t emphasize this enough, the 4th-largest metropolitan area in the US. MLB gains nothing, nothing, by punishing those teams and letting others go free. If Manfred came down hard on, like, Pittsburgh or Kansas City, while ignoring the Yankees and Dodgers, then I’d concede the point. But it doesn’t work in this scenario, and it’s a tired point that Astros fans cling to with their fat, sweaty, thieving little fingers as though it were some morsel of fat-laden brisket that they couldn’t wait to get back to their oil-stinking hovel and shove down their remorseless gullets.

What I’m saying is that the Astros can fuck all the way off.

litre_cola

Hippo, in the SecsiMexi nightcap Teddy Atlas will kill beach town. It’s 2 to 1 in my book.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That’s two commercials in a row (Patton Oswalt/Caesar’s Lily/OANNT&T) where the character appears on a screen in the commercial.

rockingdog

Annnnd Cora has pulled Chris Sale.
Only made it thru 3. Oh well. 🤷‍♂️
Now we see what this Sox bullpen has…

Gonna do a shot in honor of OCG
Goooo Sox!

Horatio Cornblower

Not even 3. Ottavino had to finish the 3rd.

Not a great sign.

scotchnaut

Time to put Billy Bargain out there, I reckon.

King Hippo

WHY ARE MY TUDN ANNOUNCERS SPEAKING INGLES???

SonOfSpam

Ooh, those must be bueno pills.

King Hippo

Maybe I am ded? FUCK, first I was only imaginary, now this.

Doktor Zymm

GHOST IN THE MACHINE

Horatio Cornblower

comment image?w=980&q=75

rockingdog

Update;

Astros have pulled their starter
Hell YES!!!!

SonOfSpam

(bangs on trash can)

(oh…to clarify, nothing to do with the Astros, just my Oscar The Grouch cosplay night)

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Speaking of pulling the starter, when are you going to mow that lawn, Eli?” – Olivia Manning

rockingdog

LoL
Lil Wayne says….

That’s Rockinggggg!
Goooo Sox!

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rockingdog

Update;

Sox hitting some good stuff 💪
Now up 3-1
Bar is officially ROCKING!!!

Horatio Cornblower

I wasn’t sure who I would root for, but watching that cheating fuck Altuve make an error and then giggling almost, (but not quite), as much as I did at RTD’s version of an avenging Richie Incognito, I am going with the Sox.

Fuck all the Astros, past* and present.

*does not apply to JR Richard. That man was terrifying.

Doktor Zymm

So Civ 6 isn’t particularly stable on newer machines with newer graphics cards, especially if you made the mistake of updating the drivers. It just crashed and I thought the crash report was being kinda facetious by saying “Your program is crashing. Exciting”
But no, it said “Exiting”

scotchnaut

“Praise You” used for a Guinness ad. It was always going to come to this but I’m not happy it’s here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ruAi4VBoBSM&ab_channel=FatboySlim

scotchnaut

It’s hard to believe that some of the people in this video are twenty years older than they were when this was initially taped.

Last edited 3 years ago by scotchnaut
Horatio Cornblower

For the love of all that is holy, please tell me this is an elaborate skit.

scotchnaut

Look at Horatio, too busy climbing the corporate step-ladder back in ’99. That was a Fatboy Slim/Spike Jonz joint for jeebuz sakes!

Horatio Cornblower

I was dealing with a 1-year-old then; I promise you I had no fucking idea what was going on in pop culture.

scotchnaut

“Dealing with a 1-year-old, huh? I get it-grooming takes time.”

-Kenneth Pinyan

rockingdog

Yes!!!
Hernandez with the HR!!!
1-1 tie game!!
That’s Rocking! 💯

King Hippo

Man, these dickwad announcers are pulling for Clemson SO HARD

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

As opposed to Marc Trestman, who is pulling SO HARD for Clem’s son.

/sorry, it’s Friday and I’m thinking I’ll work a little blue tonight

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Like I always say, follow your balls

King Hippo

he even shelled out for a new X-box!!

SonOfSpam

Please don’t apologize, you fucking cockbite.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ugh, it’s “family weekend” for CU. I hope JonBenet Ramsay’s parents are out of town

SonOfSpam

Her pageant record wasn’t even all that great.

Horatio Cornblower

Duh. That’s why she’s dead.

rockingdog

Yooo
Heck of catch to get that 3rd out. 💪

Doktor Zymm

Headed to Chicago again tomorrow, returning on Monday night. Maybe THIS time I will figure out how to paint, watch football, and day drink all at the same time!

For tonight, enjoying a bottle of Breathless Brut Rose. I got a ticket to their anniversary 1920’s style bash in November, will make a weekend out of it up in Healdsburg. Did you realize that it is also the 20’s right now, and it is necessary to specify the 1920’s? I’ve never been to a 1820’s or 1720’s or any other 20’s themed party though. And a 2020s themed party would just be a normal party. So maybe not necessary for the next 8ish years or so.

King Hippo

Litre – I am on a heater (Defensa y Justicia HT WOO!!!), convince me to wager on Puebla.

Doktor Zymm

Dude, play the rush

litre_cola

The Sweet Potato Eaters are all over the Mexican Quinientoses.

King Hippo

Hey, I likes sweet potaters. $40 at +350 WOO!!!

SonOfSpam

I think puebla means female house, which is good luck.

Horatio Cornblower

International House of Female Pancakes?

Jump in assholes; we’re going to breakfast.

SonOfSpam

“Jump in assholes”

=Senator Graham, giving life advice

King Hippo

Koach Kliff KOVID!

WCS

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Horatio Cornblower
scotchnaut

If you like Orange on Orange violence, ask your doctor about watching Clemson vs Sillycuse right now.

Horatio Cornblower

Will it last for more than 4 hours?

litre_cola

I ‘m here for the SecsiMexi futbol live blog?

litre_cola

I don’t think Necaxa is a real team as we have discussed.

Anthony In TX

Don’t forget to climb your mountains, boys and girls.

Screenshot_20211015-193509_Instagram.jpg
Anthony In TX

Normally I would, but these are pics I’m screenshotting from Instagram and saving locally, so it’s easier to just embed them.

Anthony In TX

Well, all right then.

King Hippo

judges Balls in WASP (yet again)

Horatio Cornblower

“I’m gonna check something in the back.”

If Balls doesn’t work this into his wedding vows I will eat my own foot.

Horatio Cornblower

The reception will be held at the local diner:
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WCS

“Not necessarily.”

— Deanna Favre

rockingdog

This is Rockingdog reporting live
From a bar here in New England.
Took a nap earlier.
Now I’m sippin a beer, feeling rockin

Yay baseball! ⚾️

scotchnaut

Please report on the fall coloUrs tomorrow.

litre_cola

Uhh is the old Canadian there?

rockingdog

Update;
Not yet.
But the bar is Rocking!

Senor Weaselo

I’d like to thank Umami Cart for showing up about a minute before I paid for ground pork at Stop &/Or Shop. These dumplings aren’t gonna make themselves! It’ll be Senorita Weaselo. With me failing at it and her laughing.

Anthony In TX

I’d hate to be the butt of one of your jokes.

Screenshot_20211015-193147_Instagram.jpg
King Hippo

Why I Am Not Watching Baseball – am now reduced to hoping the cheating, Dusty Baker-led Astros and the racist-chanting Braves win.

Anthony In TX

Go Stros, but only because I’m a Houstonian

WCS

As opposed to your usual racist-chanting hashtag BFIB.

King Hippo

we support ppl of ALL RACES standing theyre ground against THUGS smgdh

Senor Weaselo

I will not be watching the American League Cheaters Series because fuck then both with an eternally rusty rake.

SonOfSpam

The cheating Astros have forced me to root for the shitty Red Sox.

Am now wanting the Doyers to repeat, which ain’t like me at all.

rockingdog

Found a funny;

If I had a time machine I’d bring all the Home Depot skeletons I could find to the Victorian age and surround a village with them while they all slept

rockingdog

OMg bases a loaded and it’s only the first inning!!!
Gooo Sox!

rockingdog

Damn. Pop fly into an out. 😕

Dunstan

I just want to chill and relax with a certain someone and block out the rest of the world. “

Aw, that’s sweet, but I already made plans for tonight.

Anthony In TX

I really like the trip-hop/electronica (?) theme for this week’s music choices.

In other news, I just learned about Madison Iseman.

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rockingdog

She’s Rocking!

Anthony In TX

Oh, indeed.