Your Gumbygirl/Revanchist (Steelers/Chiefs) Darby and Open Thread

Last one, I promise. I’ve a feeling GG would go way over the top if she went to the Kentucky Derby so I picked out a little something for her.

To The Game!

Steelers/Chiefs:

-How does Tomlin get these severely flawed teams into the playoffs all the freakin’ time? Well, this time Pitt limited opposing teams to 14 or less down the stretch-that way you can get the W while only scoring 20 or so.

-The Steelers only loss during that time was a doozy and particularly relevant. It was a 36-10 whooping by these very Chiefs.

-Since the bye Mahomes’ YPA is a ‘mere’ 7.8, far below where he should be but we’ve heard time and again that teams have taken the deep stuff away from him.  So what is he supposed to do? Of course he’s going to work the short and intermediate routes for all their worth.

-As well, talk of Patty not posting his usual numbers really misses the point about this well-balanced Chiefs team. The yin/yang is much stronger with this edition. They’ve held nine(!) teams to 20 points or less this season. There’s no need for Mahomes to go bananas as he’s had to do in the past.

-So there should be some credit given to Steve Spagnuolo. ‘Spags’ to me is the perfect DC in that he has his base concepts of course but as the season progresses he identifies strengths and emphasizes them. He’s built rock-solid defenses using pressure from the interior line and also done the same by focusing on a gifted secondary.

-Juju has been out of commission since October but says he expects to play today. A physical wr that is a very effective blocker, I’m sure Najee will welcome his return-he’ll need all the help he can get.

-Depending on the metric the Steelers are the worst vs the run (I’d have bet the Chargers me-self) so maybe the sneaky play is Derrick Gore? (I’m guessing that Boris addressed this in his column)

Go get ’em.

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Doktor Zymm

This mask smells really good!

Brocky

Just FYI dousing a mask in hand sanitizer does not count as effective dissinfecting.

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Game Time Decision

Baby Jeffery forever unclean

LemonJello

It doesn’t smell like ether or chloroform, I hope.

WCS

Fatfuck got one more touchdown. Glad to see things finally working out for him.

Gumbygirl

Fire up the Sarcasmatron! It’s all we have left.

Gumbygirl

Garbage time started early, but make no mistake, it’s here to stay.

Downfield Matriculator

Did you say “over”? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!

Sharkbait

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Sharkbait

Garbage time started in 2020

Oh you’re talking about the GAME

JimU

Now I’m getting angry that there wasn’t a tie last Sunday night all over again. The Chargers would would have been at least 1000% more entertaining.

Downfield Matriculator

Only difference would have been Bosa scoring that first touchdown instead of Watt

BrettFavresColonoscopy

So basically yesterday’s games were great and today’s were hot garbage. The lesson is, never get your hopes up.

Game Time Decision

That checks out as I never see good games and missed all of yesterday’s games

TheRevanchist

Idk. This seems like a good game to me.

Redshirt

This is not the Pittsburgh Steelers I know and fear/hate/love.

WCS

This is not my beautiful house.

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Gumbygirl

Our house is going to get decrepit and shabby, until years from now some nice young couple buys it for a song and slowly polishes it back up. It’s the circle of life, young Simba.

Doktor Zymm

Or IS it? Is it better for you to be strong, or your enemy to be weak? (obvs both)

Doktor Zymm

Okay game is done, guess I should go to the bar in my Amazon says its sexy tracksuit, even though it’ll mostly be gay dudes. At least I will get 5 points to the dollar!

Doktor Zymm

I do kinda dig the green velour cleavage, but doesn’t count if obly I think it

Game Time Decision

Does it have the magical properties that the ad showed?

Mr. Ayo

The competitive portion of this match has concluded.

King Hippo

After the 2nd KC score

Game Time Decision

Tis ovar

LemonJello

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ThePirateSloth

Romano is the superior cheese over parmesan.

Fight me.

Gumbygirl

I agree.

Mr. Ayo

No need. This is correct.

Game Time Decision

Meh we’ll just slice you

Last edited 2 years ago by Game Time Decision
herodotus450

(adds ThePirateSloth to list, under Hippo)

WCS

Not the best time for Najee to FUMBRE for the first time all season. Just making an observation.

King Hippo

I mean, The Ben had KC right where he wanted them otherwise?

Gumbygirl

Al Michaels jinxed him earlier. It was inevitable. I hope he’s forced to retire like it’s rumored. Fuck him.

King Hippo

I think this is correct – after the TJ Watt GRITDOWN, the Chefs scored 4 TDs on the next 4 drives, without so much as a first down for PIT.

King Hippo

Make that FIVE

Downfield Matriculator

That is right. Nothing like constant 3and outs to make sure your already outmatched defense is also tired and if 3 downs is too many to handle, just fumble it away! Gah

makeitsnowondem

I see Reid was watching the Bills last night.

The Maestro

FAT GUY TOUCHDOWN

LemonJello

Don’t let up now, Chefs.

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Downfield Matriculator

Giving up a fat guy touchdown is having me consider what liquor I need to get next — should I hit the hard stuff now or wait until the commercial after the impending Steeler 3 and out?

BugEyedBoo

Looks like they solved that problem for you.

Gumbygirl

I’m here from the future. They did not go three and out. Unfortunately.

TheRevanchist

Fat guy touchdown!

Missed the first half in a NyQuil coma. Good time to wake up, really.

Game Time Decision

A FAT GUY TD

FAT GUY TD

WOOOHOOO

Game Time Decision

Fuck my stream is slow tonight

Doktor Zymm

Oh but fat guy td is the best, WORTH IT

Mr. Ayo

FATGUYDOWN!

Doktor Zymm

They’re just doing this in the least fun way possible aren’t they?

Petronel

FATGUYDOWN

LemonJello

FAT GUY TOUCHDOWN!!

Game Time Decision

Handstand to a flip. In pads. Holy shit

WCS

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Hey, everyone, it’s hawkey season!

Downfield Matriculator

We’ve secretly replaced the Steelers defensive secondary with jars of Folgers crystals . . . let’s see if anyone notices

Game Time Decision

You could make stronger coffee than this defence

Sharkbait

OK KC, the only ones allowed to score from now on is the defense.

Doktor Zymm

Nostalgia fuck, maybe tomorrow. Shit I hate dating and meeting people. Oh well.

Gatoraids

McCarthy saying he should have practiced with the officials the play before the game more

Downfield Matriculator

Bluebunny really doubled down on that fucking stupid call — it is two or maybe three throws from the 40 or 1 from the 25 if (big if as it turns out) everything goes perfectly. Jerry really knows how to pick coaches.

blaxabbath

Big Ben: “Hey honey! I’m gonna head to the Wildcard game! Want to show up looking sharp! You seen my tuxedo?… Oh no! Not the nice one. The one I wear when I’m going to get my ass kicked!”

Ripnorm

Don T

Worth noting: only time Joe Haden has done SOMETHING has been against the Titans.
All I can do is bear witness, k?

JimU

Thanks for coming Steelers. You’ll receive a copy of the home game as a parting gift.

Gumbygirl

Yup. I’m pretty sure this is ovah. Good riddance, rapist!

Downfield Matriculator

This impending Steelers loss would be a lot more palatable if the Chiefs fans storm the field after and trample failson Collinsworth into a fine paste

Gumbygirl

They need to lure Al and Cris down there first. Bait the bourbon trap!

Dunstan

/takes deep breath

SAYING “RPO” IS ONLY ONE SYLLABLE SHORTER THAN JUST SAYING ‘RUN PASS OPTION’. YOU HAVE LOTS OF AIRTIME TO FILL.

Mr. Ayo

Quite odd for announcers who must say NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE whenever possible.

King Hippo

My kid just said “BTW” out loud this week. I pointed out this was both (i) douchey; and (ii) an entire EXTRA syllable

Doktor Zymm

Verbal laziness is a principle i live my life by.

Doktor Zymm

This is legit how I have decided between pronounciations and slang in various versions of english. Not only is aluminium a newfangled version, it is also wasteful of verbal effort!

herodotus450

“www” is more syllables than “world wide web”

Dunstan

/hipster
Oh, so you don’t pronounce it “dub dub dub”?

Doktor Zymm

‘net

WCS

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Mr. Ayo

The Stillers now have as many punts as points this half.

King Hippo

Thicc Punter is their most likeable player, so I support this.

King Hippo

KC sure has done some dumbass fucking shit in this game.

Downfield Matriculator

and yet . . .

King Hippo

It’s almost like PIT is held together with spit and duct tape. Coach Epps always earns his paycheck.

Brick Meathook

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LemonJello

Worst. Upstairs. Neighbors. Ever.

Beerguyrob

Hypnotic.

Beerguyrob

I know it’s only almost halftime, but “They Live” just started on a Canadian movie channel. So, my next 15 minutes are taken care of.

LemonJello

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Beerguyrob

First scene I saw!

LemonJello

I’ll have to find it on one of the streaming services and give it a watch tomorrow.

Sharkbait

A KC Defensive score would be very much appreciated here.

Downfield Matriculator

This is more like what I expected, sigh

Dunstan

Speaking of Chiefs fans, has there been an Otto Man sighting any time recently?

WCS

He’s been building his own secret lair for years. It takes a while to become an evil mastermind. Ask Dok.

Doktor Zymm

You can buy in, but no one takes you seriously if you don’t do the important bits for yourself. Haven’t seen Otto in my area, but there are plenty of spots to establish yourself and I would hate to have to lasar blast someone from here because they got too close

The Maestro

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Horatio Cornblower

No. The longer time passes without his reemerging the more credence I give the rumors that Otto was really Hilary Clinton.

Dunstan

How ironic. I’m secretly Martin O’Malley.

King Hippo

Redshirt’s WKRP and DonT’s Magnificent Tits is the matchup we all want to see. God help me, I hope the Owl Shempion comes out of that one.

Redshirt

I just don’t want WKRP to play Buffalo in Buffalo while they’re still Super Saiyan from beating the crap out of New England. Also, if we do play Buffalo and get past them, I just know Pittsburgh will upset Tennessee and the AFC Championship Game would be Steelers @ Bengals. I don’t think I could survive that.

Don T

/takes screenshot
//sets chicken traps for sacrifice

King Hippo

I am very glad to have this fixture muted.

Doktor Zymm

The surface of Mars, or the shit I paid professional painters to do? Fuck that, DIY

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Gumbygirl

How is that even possible?

Doktor Zymm

They didn’t prep the surfaces for latex paint

Mr. Ayo

At least it’s not a skin pic.

Dunstan

I was going to guess it was Ben’s dick

Doktor Zymm

It could be, no idea why my realtor thought “ben penis” was a good color scheme

Dunstan

Well, it wouldn’t be the first time Ben’s penis has been somewhere it wasn’t wanted.

herodotus450

“Whoa lady, we didn’t know you was gonna bust out the TEM on us here.”

blaxabbath

I’ve got a huge yard at this new place. I love the original block parts but the cinder block needs repair — I got a small section that needs to be rebuilt (that neighbor seems like a good dude so don’t expect any bs there) — and I want to patch it, skim coat it, and paint it. And I’ve had such disappointment with painters that I am thinking of doing it all myself like an idiot.

Doktor Zymm

No, you are correct! Painters are the worst! It’s one of the easier things to do yourself, and they charge thousands, fuck em

Horatio Cornblower

One of the guys I played poker with, (back when you could so that and not have it be a superspreader event), was a house painter. He was/is fantastic, (at painting; in life the guy’s a mess), and he does not mind charging you for it.

He did a couple of rooms for us, was done by mid-afternoon, (with an hour for lunch) and charged like $300. My wife was stunned by the bill, because he’s been there at most 4 hours. I pointed out that there were no streaks, no blobs on the floor, everything was cleaned up, and the two of us weren’t fighting about whose fault it was that the electric outlets were painted over.

It seems simple, but painting’s a skill, and a good painter is worth the money they’ll charge you.

Game Time Decision

Underhanded throw and no mention that Mahomes was a high-school pitcher? Wtf

Doktor Zymm

Chicago dude used to be Pats fan, but don’t think he follows football any more. Guess that’s for the best if I’m committed to being a Bills fan now, but still, super lame to abandon

Gumbygirl

Yeah, that could become hate fuck quickly. Followed by no fuck.

Doktor Zymm

I think we’re at nostalgia fuck, if he shows up

King Hippo

Perhaps KC is awake now, but still skeptical.

Doktor Zymm

False start is the most fun penalty due to it being almost a conga line

Redshirt

Morpheus the Travel Agent: “If you take the Red Pill, you’ll take I-71 North to Cleveland and I-90 East to Buffalo.”
Neo the Bengals Fan: “But what about the Blue Pill? Isn’t that an option.”
Morpheus the Travel Agent: “Not the way Kansas City playing so far.”

Gumbygirl

High five Yinzers and Yinz- adjacent!

WCS

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