Sexy Friday – July 4th Weekend 2022!

Before we get started with the Sexy, some business to attend to.

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Balls’ Monthly Resolutions June Update!

Resolution #1 – Fitness

The goal is to get to 15% body fat and stay there. I got to 13.6% in April so first part was achieved! The trick now is to keep it below 15%. I am STILL at 14% and holding steady. I will be starting another program after the holiday.

Resolution #2 – Literature

The goal is to read 5 new books in 2022. In February, I was given a book to read for work and I finished that. In March, I finished “The Little Sister” by Raymond Chandler. So, I had 2 down and 3 to go going into April. In May, I got into a reading frenzy. I finished “The Long Goodbye” by Raymond Chandler and then promptly ordered and read two of the Fletch series books by Gregory McDonald (“Confess, Fletch” and “Fletch’s Fortune”). No new books in June but Resolution COMPLETE!

Resolution #3 – Writing

The goal is to create a new series for DFO. It just finished posting in June. I hope you enjoyed it! I enjoyed writing it so much that I may write a followup series before the year is done. Resolution COMPLETE!

Resolution #4 – Leisure

The goal is to take a week off work with no cell phone availability. I have finally managed to make this happen! Starting tomorrow, I will be driving across the USA to deliver a special package to an institution of higher learning on the East Coast.

Resolution #5 – Giving Back

The goal is to perform one act of giving back per month. In April, I didn’t really do anything. In May, I volunteered for my high school alma mater to help with their graduation events but didn’t do anything in June. I still owe one for April and now one for June.

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And now, some sexy videos. As always, fly low and avoid the radar!

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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Horatio Cornblower

Or Pamela Anderson?
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Gumbygirl

She really was beautiful. Too bad she didn’t believe it. Went waaaay too far with the plastic surgery.

Horatio Cornblower

Canada Independence Weekend (or whatever) and we’re just going to ignore Trish Stratus? It’s like I don’t even know you people!

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Last edited 2 years ago by Horatio Cornblower
Gumbygirl

Sexy Friday! Meet Princess.

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Horatio Cornblower

I suspect I would holler well before we got to the negotiation stage.

TheRevanchist

That’s the spirit!

Game Time Decision

Watching AFL live, I think, have no clue what’s going on, but I recognise the team names, so thx balls

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Essendon is Rikki’s team.

So I assume they’re losing.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m sure they are, they are absolutely putrid this year.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ok this season of Stranger Things is definitely keeping my interest.

Horatio Cornblower

My daughter has already claimed the TV I usually use for sports for the two-and-a-half-hour (!) finale tomorrow night, saying that she is going to make a tent out of blankets and eat ice cream while watching it.

yeah right

I’m through season 3 but haven’t started season 4.

All I know is Kate Bush hit number one on the charts with a song that wasn’t that great 35 years ago.

But good for her.

2Pack

She always hustles on the ice, and she likes Balls hustle on the resolutions. Ciao tutti.

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Brocky

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Last edited 2 years ago by Brocky
ArmedandHammered

WTF?

Sharkbait

My thoughts exactly

rockingdog

Found a funny;

the first cicada of the season just walked itself right into my fire pit. 13 years under ground looked at the world and said nope

Brocky

Also not an American

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Brocky

Because she was on TV earlier

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WCS

U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!

Brocky

And of course she’s Canadian lol

Mr. Ayo

These are the exports we support.

Redshirt

A Bengals Fan Reaction to the 2020-2021 NFL Season – YouTube

A Bengals Fan Reaction to the 2021-2022 NFL Season – YouTube

How am I just finding this now? Also, I can confirm the authenticity of these videos. Including “Kitty Goes Meow”.

“Oh, look at that! Joe Burrow doesn’t get sacked and we win the game! Zero sacks, we win the game! Not that complicated!”

“Why do you make it so hard to love you.”

(Super Bowl Last Drive)
“Oh, 3rd and 1. We’re gonna play Mixon, right?” “Its okay. Last drive of the game. McPherson’s gonna send us to overtime and the O-Line just let us down.”

(just to prove I call everything straight)
Bengals Fan: “Stupid referees.”
Raiders Fan: “Oh, so now you want to complain about the refs.”

And of course, the unofficial Bengals fans credo:

“The audacity… that I had… to hope.”

WCS

Grossi is damn good.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

>I will be driving across the USA to deliver a special package to an institution of higher learning on the East Coast.

I think I saw that movie already:

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Don T

Loved that movie! After social media, it’s a generation gap / unearthed time capsule stuff. The remake would be a hookup three blocks away, but the cashier at the condom store was reading… I dunno, Rilke or “Fight Club”.

BeefReeferLives

It was the shotgunning of beers (and how-to course) that had me…

Horatio Cornblower

ESPN is showing a special on the Red Wings beat down of Claude Lemieux. Apparently there’s some thought that Darren McCarty shouldn’t have kneed Lemieux in the head.

Let me be clear: Yes, he absolutely should have kneed Lemieux in the head. Repeatedly.

Dunstan

Lemieux was a sonofabitch. Now, for a few seasons there, he was OUR sonofabitch. Why, I remember in 1986, he scored the OT winner in Game Seven against …

Oh.

Never mind.

Horatio Cornblower

It was a backhander that went over Liut’s shoulder. it’s seared into my memory.

But you and I can discuss that at some future time of my choosing, probably in a dark alley.

Sharkbait

Fun fact: Claude and Brendan Lemieux are the only father/son combination in NHL history to both be suspended for biting an opponent

Horatio Cornblower

Fun fact: Both are arguments as to why Roe v. Wade should not only have been upheld, but been made mandatorily retroactive.

yeah right

I’ve mentioned that I’m a Jersey Devils fan before right?

I’ve got a 3rd jersey primarily black with the red shoulders and collar. It’s unnumbered.

If I was to own another? It would be a number 4 red jersey Scotty Stevens sweater.

My favorite hockey player ever.

Sharkbait

He would be run out of the league if he played now.

yeah right

Dude, he would be in jail!

Wakezilla

Any other Canadians wearing orange today? I was surprised to see how many Calgarians were wearing orange today

litre_cola

Many were in Banff, and there was a pow wow on the main drag.

litre_cola

Indigenous rights and all that goes with it. Residential schools and their found unmarked graveyards is a biggie which started the orange movement.

Brick Meathook

So it’s anti-immigrant movement?

Wakezilla

Adding onto what Litre said, the Canadian KKKonvey appropriated the Canadian flag. These people also replaced the Maple Leaf with swastikas. This has resulted in a lot of people feeling dirty to look at the flag, especially when on a truck, or on hockey sticks. So as there are supposed to be a mass Canadian KKKONVEY freedom protests today, many Canadian folks are wearing orange to disassociate themselves from all that

Horatio Cornblower

My opinion on that is the same as that expressed in ‘Office Space’: “Why should I change my name? He’s the one who sucks.”

We can’t keep letting right-wing assholes coopt cool things and force us to drop them. No, fuck them. We’ll use whatever it happens to be, (the maple leaf in this case), and they can fuck off to hell.

King Hippo

ah should hope they’s still some good Protestants in the wilds of Canadia!!

Horatio Cornblower

Gotta keep them Papists in line somehow.

Doktor Zymm

Greetings from MEX! Despite the only 3 hours of sleep on the redeye this morning, I went on a 6-hour walking tour that was amazing and educational. I propose a DFO clubhouse here!

Oh no! My flight to Paris is delayed! I guess I will have to have another glass of the 2006 Piper Heidsieck. I have a theory that champagne provides one with energy and so far this theory is proving correct.

Doktor Zymm

Score! Let’s all go crash at Balls’ place!

WCS

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Dunstan

“In victory, you deserve champagne; in defeat, you need it.” — Napoleon Bonaparte

Horatio Cornblower

Just read a NYTimes article on Napoleon’s approach to Haiti and, suffice it to say, not really a fan.

Also Charles X can fuck right off.

Last edited 2 years ago by Horatio Cornblower
SonOfSpam

Glad to see you’re reading the “Fletch” series; I made the mistake of reading the “Felch” series, and it sucked ass.

Col. Duke LaCross

Once.

King Hippo

Did I earn #FourthPill today? No.

Did I just take it anyway? Yes.

WCS

Unlike #FourthMeal, #FourthPill doesn’t cause crippling diarrhea.

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SonOfSpam

Combine the two, you’re nice n regular.

WCS

Definitely something.

King Hippo

Opium really does need a good marketing campaign,

BeefReeferLives

If yer talkin, like, REAL chandu, howz bout a Miller Lite-eque campaign of:
TASTES GREAT vs FEELS FUCKIN AWESOME

WCS

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litre_cola

deliver a special package to an institution of higher learning on the East Coast.

Heh, deliver a ” special package”.

WCS

“What’s your address?”

— Ted K., NC

Last edited 2 years ago by WCS
SonOfSpam

He’s driving a box of feces to MIT for rejecting his application in 1987.

He’s right to do it.

Doktor Zymm

“Institution of higher learning” is a very nice pet name for your sweetheart

Horatio Cornblower

If it’s UConn I expect a call. Hell, even Yale.

Not Princeton though. Goddamn clown college.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Speaking of Princeton, did you read the NYT today?

WCS

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Horatio Cornblower

I knew I could count on WCS.

Horatio Cornblower

I did not. I only get the Sunday edition and then I’ll pick it up once or twice during the week.

I just do not have that kind of time. “All the news that fit to print”, and they’re not fucking kidding either.

litre_cola

Oh boy. My old boss had a black leather couch put in his office and many jokes were made.

Horatio Cornblower

My old boss was a big Christian type, (but not an asshole about it), and he put a couch in his office so he could “take naps.”

Which is exactly what he used it for, and none of us ever even thought to think otherwise.