There is no Premiership action this morning. Hope you remembered to sleep in.
This Autumn has been interesting for Hippo, to say the least. Denver started 1-5. Everton had one point at the first international break. NC State…was doing NC State things, losing at home twice (ND and Louisville), and getting its doors blown off by DUKE without their starting QB (Devils won 24-3, despite completing a TOTAL of 4 forward passes).
But as we sit in mid-November, all have found form and redemption. Denver is 4-5, with impressive (if not artful) wins over Kansas City and at Buffalo. Everton are getting team-wide buy in, and playing above their talent level for a change. “Safely mid-Table” looks plausible, perhaps almost likely. NC State rallied to beat Clemson, Miami, and away to Wake Forest (our bogey ground). No, there won’t be any chance at an ACC title, but good football is so much fun to watch – especially when one’s alma mater is doing it. Very physical, resilient team. GUH, if only we had some skill position speed/talent outside of true freshman KC “Mister Sunshine” Concepcion.
In other words…keep watching, and hoping against all reason for things to get better. Once in awhile, footy will surprise you. In a non-terrible way.
ED. NOTE – Obviously, the above was written before the 10-point FFP penalty was imposed, but thanks to the last month of play – Toffee supporters feel like it is very survivable, even if not reduced on appeal. Would have been panic stations WITHOUT this last month-ish of decent play and results.
Louisville (+0.5) at Miami-FL (Noon, ABC)
A win here guarantees that the Cards will play Florida State for the ACC title. As such, we all must root fervently for Louisville (as U*NC is the only other possibility). Should be a low-scoring affair, we will see how Tyler Van (Subaru Outback Driver) reacts to returning from his one-week benching (the other guy broke his arm grusesomely at the end of the FSU loss).
Oklahoma (-24.5) at Original Recipe Big Love (Noon, ESPN)
Kind of a weird kickoff time out West, but maybe the Stormin’ Mormons (who have been in a bad tailspin of late) catch Steerfuckers North napping. I dunno, it’s not a great early slate.
SMU (-8.5) at Memphis (Noon, ESPN2)
There is value in the Tiggers’ moneyline here, and I am not just saying that to suck up to Mister Pickle. This would wrap up an American title game berth for the ACC-bound Ponies, should they prevail as Vegas expects.
NC State (+3) at Virginia Tech (3:30, ACCN)
Both of these teams are 4-2 in the ACC, with hated rivals on deck next week. Bronze medal implications! Are you not entertained??
Georgia (-10) at Tennessee (3:30, CBS)
Holy cats, an actual decent matchup! Finally, the Dawgs have to play someone on the road and that has a pulse. Maybe not as STRONG a pulse as before Mizzou kicked their teeth in, but still.
Oregon (-23.5) at Arizona State (4:00, Fox)
Will Quack Attack get caught looking ahead to next week’s Civil War? Or next next week’s potential re-match with Washington?? I guess we’s about to find out. Sparky can sometimes be feisty, though they can’t hang with a focused Oregon team.
Tennessee clearly exhausted from the UConn game two weeks ago.
How smart of Ohio State to schedule a cupcake game the week before Michigan so they can get their confidence up.
What? This is a Big Ten team they are playing? Huh.
Drinking bourbons to fortify myself for my family coming over, and listening to Christmas carols. Yup, fucking deal.
Promises to make for an interesting evening.
UCLA QB just threw a TD but I don’t think he remembers it.
They just called Unsportsmanlike Penalty on the half the population of Ohio.
“Well that was quick!”
-Fans
-Golden Gophers
-Redshirt’s Prom Date
Okay, who reduced Minnesota’s difficulty setting from Varsity to Rookie?
.
Disney’s still around, huh?
Ray Harry Hauhsen rolls in his grave. Fuck Hollywood and its fucking numbskull ideas. Seriously, fuck them.
THERE IS ONLY ONE HERCULES!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6p3nmyTICo0
3rd and Goal from the 23? JV NFL BLITZ!
THIS RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY HOUSEHOLD I CALL IT THE SET OF EMILY IN PARIS BECAUSE AT MOST 10% OF THE BRIE THAT GETS BOUGHT ENDS UP BEING EATEN BY ANYONE.
If i lived in Paris I would invite fuckface French people over and serve the following:
Hamburger Helper
Velveeta sliced cheese
Jello Mold
Headcheese
Ice cream cake
Bar
Miller Lite
Old Forrester
Fortified Wine – Mad Dog Strawberry
Malt Liquor
Wolven Sort might actually be kind of…good now?? Like, GOOD good?
(knew better than to say, or even THINK that out loud)
“Please, universe, send me a comeuppance”
Why is USC wide receiver Deuce Robinson a skinny white kid?
Usually that’s the coach’s kid.
Jon Gruden has a kid named Deuce but he’s definitely not skinny.
He looks like Arnold Scwarnegger took a shit.
“No kidding! He should be a drug dealer in 1970’s Times Square that pimps out a pre-teen Jodie Foster!”
-P. Schrader
28-7 Cousinfuckers up on JV Bungles at half.
Oh, shit. JV Clubhouse derby!
Redshirt and Co. have to adjust to life in a new conference.
Can y’all match up in a bowl against the Wolven Sort? I forgets what aligns with what.
Mister Sunshine is gonna be the next Tyreek Hill. Hopefully, without the child and/or lady beatings.
Anyone watching Wolven Sort/Castrated Turkeys in solidarity with Hippo and tWBS’ ghost? NO? FACK YOU!!!!
Fatso Chip coaching for his Westwood Klavern JERB today, apparently
Da U is the perfect embodiment of their meathead coach.
It’s a damned shame the guy who hauled in the Hail Mary didn’t have anyone to pitch it to.
or if the pitch recipient DSJ’d the ball inside the 1. Still, it was pretty funny.
Fucking Maryland has never been a football school, and it makes me gnash my teeth and roll my eyes and want to punch a turtle.
Fuck you fucking Tua! Goddamn.
Really gonna hurt his chances of winning league MVP
Come Terps, shock these fucking midwest farmers
But their daughters really make me feel alright!
Wifey is a Saint Update: She’s no lover of Xmas. (she once put up the tree on the 20th of December and took it down on the 26th) However, her best friend is doing chemo and is afraid she won’t make it to the 25th. Guess who is putting up the tree with her buddy as I type.
You should call and ask her to bring some fried chickens on way back. #WifelyDuty
One of my favorite Christmas stories was when my girls were younger and after the divorce. The former alive and former missus right and I alternated years with the girls for Christmas and this was one of her years with the girls.
I picked them up in San Diego and brought them here to LA and we did the magical Christmas thing before the 25th and I delivered them back to San Diego on the 24th.
I came back home on Christmas eve and threw the Christmas tree off my balcony and took it to the trash.
Always wondered what the people passing by thought of seeing a Christmas tree in the trash on Christmas eve.
I would have given my left nut to watch you toss that tree off the balcony.
Just finished putting up the lights that go around the edge of the roof. The rest of the lights can wait for another day or not at all. Don’t want to be up on the roof in general and definitely not with any kinda snow or ice on it, so try to get that part done early
You have no idea how badly I wish your wife was best friends with Kellyanne Conway.
Notre Dame Football:
A program so legitimately unlikable that it’s makes making root for a team caught in a cheating scandal just so it’ll lessen notre dame’s chances of making the college playoff
12 teams is next season, no worries this year. GO TERPS
Rosaries should not be used to tie someone up
THIS NOTRE DAME TEAM, I CALL THEM PRIESTS CAUSE THEY’RE FUCKING EVERYBODY OVER AND GETTING AWAY WITH IT!
[Shines a spotlight on this comment]
-M. Ruffalo
Looks at this comment and gets a twinge: Sanduskey
Look, BYU. You have Black guys now. GET SOME PRESSURE ON THE QB.
You’d think they’d have handled the transition from Samoans to The Blacks a bit better. smh…
Have they checked those magical disks they found in the desert to see if there’s a reference to those who are not white?
I wonder if Mormon Jeebus is depicted wearing a white, short-sleeved shirt and tie?
Doing prep work for 2 separate meals and neither one are today’s meal.
It’s good to be back in the kitchen.
pics or it didn’t happen
There will be pics.
Sudden Original Recipe Big Love Change
Nikki Haley: “She’ll close the borders before it’s too late.”
-Fear Politics personified
and THIS is the “normie lane” candidate
“Read My Thin Lips: No New Immigrants.”
-N. Haley
Too late. Her parents already got in.
My law firm tix to Vichy Whalers/Ice Stillers got offered around several times yesterday. I could have pretended WCS was a client, but then I would have had to go to a hockey game (and also, WCS ain’t fly).
Love that Vichy Whalers tickets are being offered around an office several times with no takers.
Love it.
ah mean, they’s FITBAW still to be played!!
Woot! Brawl of the Wild!
Winner gets first pick on livestock?
Michigan doubles down on the picerception in the red zone.
Jokes about sexually harrassing my attractive female doctor aside, my physical went well except for one thing – my LDL levels. Nothing tragic – just slightly elevated – but it means I need to eat more vegetables. Disgusting, disgusting vegetables.
Probably more spinach and chard than anything else for now, since that’s what’s growing well in the garden at the moment.
I wish my Doc was a hawt lady. Mine have all tended to look like Don Rickles.
Easy, Al. Just grab your bottle of potato vodka.
“GOOD GOD NO!” – Andy Reid and Eli Manning, in unison
Did you see the rib eye roasts on sale at Ralph’s for 7.99 a pound?
They’re beautiful.
They’re even cheaper at Vons – $6.97.
TAMU up 17-7 now, guess they did catch Abilene Christian looking ahead to their big Rivalry Week clash with Abilene Heathen after all (smh)
Sens are playing against Filip Gustavsson, a goalie they traded a while ago. What is the combined record of traded goalies against their old Sens team since 2007? It’s only 34-3-10.
https://twitter.com/ArkansasFred/status/1725933152756007372
“Wish I was a part of a scout team…” – Eli Manning, still disappointed after being told last spring that he had aged out of the summer session at Camp Winnetanka
The plus side of the sinus thing is I am living RTD’s dream, still in sweats, sipping elderberry tea, (pinky out; I am a fancy lad), and having absolutely no intention of doing anything for strenuous than taking a shower at some point.
I miss the days when you could just have a bad cold and not have your wife say “do you want to take a Covid test?” which is another way for her to say “take this Covid test or I’ll put a scorpion in your slippers”
Anyway, now my brain hurts and I don’t have Covid.
“There is value in the Tiggers’ moneyline here”
All it took was one slip-up to get Uncle Ed removed from the Winnie The Pooh themed improv group
What does Uncle Ed think of Coach Salah, 2+ years in?
Says if he were in charge of Hamas, Israel would be able to dismantle their Iron Dome and reduce the IDF to reserves since there would be no offensive
The idea that Everton is getting a 10-point penalty that may very well relegate them, while Man City gets a stern talking to tells you all you need to know about the Premier.
Prem official: “The amount of cheating you’ve done is unconscionable. This team is going to receive the severest penalty possible.”
Man City: [casually points to bone saw, yawns]
Prem official: [tugs nervously at collar] “Me? I didn’t say anything.”
We’ll look back in Man City as charming rogues when Newcastle does something(s) exponentially worse and then the Saudis jack the price of oil up $2 a liter when they get call on it.
Meh gas was that price and more in the summer up here
And Newcastle made the Champions League.
Heh heh, anytime I see Shannon Elizabeth I remember how she divorced her husband because he pranked her by telling her that he’d made a sextape of them and it had gotten stolen and was about to be leaked.
HARF HARF ONE TIME THE BEN WENT THROUGH A LOOKING GLASS ZERO STARS WOULD NOT RECOMMEND
I tried watching cross country for 5 minutes. Holy crap, that was worse than watching Russian television programming.
RTV is the only real news.
“Ha ha, you meant to type MTV News, right?” – as-yet undeveloped kharacter who is stuck in the nineties
NC State, national champs again WOO!!!!
I ran it in high school, (I was the guy towards the back), and it does not translate well to TV.
I ran for two-and-half-years (thanks, knees*), and there’s absolutely no chance XC is interesting to watch.
It’s NASCAR without any wrecks, strategy, or… well, sightlines.
*Now-Future WCS truly appreciates the increasing stiffness and early-onset arthritis.
No wrecks, you say?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ni63iXV7OSw
Nice race you got there. Be a shame if a bunch of herbivores ruined it for you
(Large buck, nudging you towards the deer food aisle at Tractor Supply)
Canada up 1 rip on the Reggae Boyz in Jamaica. Glad the game was moved due to rain last night!
Who is showing the game?
One Soccer on Fubo
Just a reminder to all the sprots fans in the room: the SEC plays a pansy-ass pussy schedule with only 8 conference games, so if you want to be fair just mentally add 1 (or ok I guess 0.5) to the loss column for every team in the conference.
This is the FARE critique of the nation’s best league. Needs fixin’ ASAP.
Now that Balls will become an honest man, it’s time to look for engagement ideas for the Steel and Furys
Reason for divorce: Ring didn’t fit perfectly the first time.
Differences: unreconcilable.
Don’t give me ideas…
Woke up expecting a nice, relaxing, dreary morning where I could stay in my pajamas all morning. Instead…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1P5n8YRY6Kw
This is SUCH an underrated moviefilm.
It really is wonderful. It captures LA perfectly.
I can’t wait to experience a “rapid unscheduled disassembly” later today.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKVARXSHZD8
If you’re in the mood for some hot morning hockey action the Sens are playing the Wild at 11am.
Oh another exhibition game in Sweden, eh? Those don’t count towards the regular season standings at all, I heard.
Fitting-because not being able to count has been a Detroit Red Wings fan’s most noticeable trait.
/KaPow! Zingo! Glarf!
Not my fault I lost all those fingers at the metal brake station!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=081a5Thjl5g
Space Karen’s another step closer to fulfilling his dream of becoming a Bond villain.
As a matter of priorities, I have no idea how anyone has the free time to even bother with caring about Israel/Palestine Chicken/Egg.
Just give me my Yankees BoSox WS so I can shut up and give you my money.
https://ktar.com/story/5549485/pro-palestinian-groups-protest-rep-rashida-tlaibs-canceled-asu-appearance-in-tempe/
Rep. Tlaib, in Hippo’s opinion, can fuck right off. As Josh Marshall says, there isn’t a nation on the planet who would allow Hamas to continue existing on their border after the actions of 7 October. And to accuse THE JEWS of “genocide” in this context is a little too close to “blood libel” for me. Sure, some of these “student groups” are just useful idiots. But it’s hard to believe that of “gasoline on the fire” technicians like Rep. Tlaib.
Like Mr. Marshall, I am a solid leftist and fully support a two-state solution.
Now, the disinformation machine has the evangelicals all kooky about RUS/UKR, and the activist left in a similar tizzy about ISR/PAL.
Well you do but but, you know, TeH PILLZ LOVE!!!
You do make a persuasive point there, inshallah!
Rep. Tlaib is gonna talk herself out of a job.
If she blows up the Coalition for the Enlightenment ™, I think she will deem that a fair trade. UGH.
Pass the green bean casserole will ya Uncle Brian?
The internet is a land of contrasts:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brown_note
Will Sparky get the So Bad The AD Quit Bounce this week?
https://arizonasports.com/story/3538326/asu-kenny-dillingham-urges-fans-step-up-nil-ramps-up/
What do you think will be the outcome of the EPL point sanctions on Everton? I’m not sure if they pulled the trigger on it yet but I read it will be 10 points plus the potential of other clubs that were relegated possibly filing for damages. Looking at the “evidence” it all strikes me as odd.
I am still reading to learn more, but the gallows “humoUr” around our parts was that Everton (in the Moshiri era) was just a money-laundering operation for Rooskie oligarch Usamov. We were kidding on the square, so none of this really surprises me.
After this morning’s reading, I think absolute best case is reduced to 6 points on appeal. Median outcome, maybe Prem agrees to reduce to 8 if we drop appeal.
I don’t think there is any vast injustice here. We’ve had an impulsive toddler running the club, and that’s the most generous reading.
That’s what I thought. Not much there there. Smacks of something most other clubs do/did from time to time.
EPL just wants a cut of that money too, otherwise they wouldn’t care
Does it help boost the Cherries one slot away from relegation?
Cosign!
Seconded…