Welcome to the hellish realization that the 2-week-long vacation is nearly over. As is the NFL regular season. FUCK. ME. SIDEWAYS.
Naut du Scotch will be by shortly to take you into the Black Panther Party, plus late night FITBAW action.
But we are done with JV exhibitions, and also pass the halfway mark…so let’s pay a little better attention to the Prem.
City of Men are back into the thick of things, though still 4 back of King’s Afrikan Water Pistols, Villa can still see them both, but is realistically pacing themselves for the bronze medal.
Down at the arse end…Wolves are irretrievably fucked. Burnley? Most of the way fucked. Rum Ham is still waiting for the Governor (our own Cecil Rhodes???) to call in with a pardon, and then maybe Robins Hood would be against the wall (where they belong).
Speaking of, Forest are away to Angry Villa (7:30, USA) to start things off today. The 10:00 window is shallow and awful (Burnley/Trashbirds and Wolves/Rum Ham), but yeah right’s Cherris will hope for a spotlight boost against maybe-in-2nd-gear Arsenal (12:30, NBC)? I guess we’ll see. Loads MOAR on Sunday, even the Sticky Derby between the Toffees and Bees. Can’t wait!
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we need to trick the dnc into thinking maduro is either a big donor or somehow related to a high-ranking establishment member of the party, then they will impeach
it worked the previous two times, and only the previous two times
do actual crimes? like, big ones? nah, pass
go after hunter, and have people trash pelosi’s office? STONE HIM
From AP: MIAMI – Juan Guaidó promoted to Deputy Manager at Applebee’s
We’re into the last three weeks of Xmas over here. I had a light lunch of seasonal goodies with Madre and The Heiress
I want to hear more about the Fish Pirate’s Daughter…
There was no pork in the headline, so I dint read it 🤷🏻♂️
Please tell me that tastes as good as it looks.
Oh yeah. I go there at least twice a month.
Is that the spot you took us to?
Because that place fucking rules.
No, this is near the airport.
Slobbering in Espanol!
FUCK
Little worried about Bournemouth especially if they sell Semenyo.
Selling Semen, yo got me through some tough days in college though.
To Man City for fucks sake!
Oh good, about time they caught a break.
“And Confucius say, name go in book”
So I watched the Summer of Sam last night, good flick but way, way long. And the portrayal of my fellow Italian Americans was . . . not flattering at all. Sure, stereotypes exist but I think Spike way overboard.
When you think about it, that’s what America really needs right now – a new, either mysterious and/or charismatic serial killer. Way more entertaining than war crimes.
Beltway Smiper 2: Speed Holes Boogaloo?
Look, we all want to hear new stories in the game threads, but Scotchy is keeping a low profile these days.
Canadian authorities are not as cool with it as Americans are, okay?
But what if proper hobo disposal is the secret sauce to the Leafs bringing home teh CUP??
You promise a pack of hobos some beans, chili, and a few bottles of grain alcohol and they’ll go anywhere you want them to.
for the love of christ, get these goddamn wolves out of my house and back into school
“for the love of christ, let the school burn down so the kids have to stay home” – their teachers
I would move into a hourly motel just so they could attend school.
The Canada/Slovakia Junior Championship is making me thirsty and I’m slaking it with one of these and it is outstanding.
DeClan Rice gotta be the MVP if this team
Are you from the future?
Thank you, Declan Rice, for making me look like I know what I am talking about, as I most assuredly do not.
Starring Chevron as Sonny the restaurant owner:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/7p2WhFPn9vg
My SIL and I think Trump is going to nuke LA, and blame it on South American narco- terrorists.
Mexican auto manufacturers!
I already got my family’s text chain trying to convince me Trump is doing the right thing. They don’t need your help.
Can we pick and choose which neighborhoods get taken out? That would be a fun poll to run…
Do polls still work around here?
Vietnam 2: Viet Harder
Sweet redemption for Gabriel. Quick, too.
WPIOOFTBGW strikes!
What in the absolute fuck, Gabriel?
Thank you!
Today’s fun agenda includes the laundromat!
That annual washing of the comforter day.
There is an incredible bakery right next door, and also The Choriman!
Had a kwa-son and a cafe con leche so it’s tolerable.
Still reading Bring up the Bodies by Hillary Mantel so I’ll survive.
Don’t get too attached to Thomas Moore.
He departed in Wolf Hall and dare I say deserved his fate.
Fuck around, find out.
Quick, brutal and efficient.
It’s going to be raining until Wednesday, so of course the Dr. Mrs. put a bunch of stuff in the washing maching that cannot be put in the dryer.
The cat?
Push ball games were made for slow season days like today.
I used to love playing push ball in high school.
The Company formation after this one featured about a dozen busted up dudes. It was epic mayhem.
Did you use a medicine ball?
No we used a 6 foot heavy duty ball.
A picture of another units fun and games for perspective.
We had one of those too!
If you timed it just right you could knock a dude on the other side of the ball a good ten yards.
I remember getting absolutely hammered in one of those games. The teacher had me sit out because I was dizzy and seeing stars.
Got back in the game in about 10 minutes, because 1986.
Someone get grandpa to his matlock stories… he’s ready for a nap
His dirt nap, one could hope.
I am genuinely concerned that I am in danger of alcohol poisoning when that blessed day finally arrives.
I am going to jerk off to the point of dehydration.
SoCal will run out of weed.
Tired of living in Hell?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUORtZ0MJIw
This is a heartbreaking work of staggering genius.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqspbP-3at4
Trump proud to declare over Valenzuela 40 years in the making after being snubbed at Club 54.
When are we gonna have some shithole country come and take away our idiot leader?
Funny as fuck if France did it. Put him in the Bastille.
I’m moving today so I’ll need to call my Black Panthers shot early – Bryce Young is angry, ANGRY(!) for the cruel Scotch curse that hit last week*
Tampa will pay for the disrespect … 350 yards passing! 0 turnovers! Even Legette gets a TD pass. Defense rolls and we’re back in the playoffs for the first time in a decade.
*And also having his star rookie receiver dealing with an illness.
raises fist
Lift with your legs and not your back
I wonder if Gav will bomb Texas now for social media?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WsSJwHGHU8
I’mma stick with this beauty in voice form, too much evil in the air:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8E5f92N5yF0
You know those little handheld credit card terminals a lot of places have nowadays? They are basically little computers and they have an internet connection for sending card info. They also have a web browser and all the other stuff you might need for troubleshooting etc and apparently they aren’t locked down all that well. Friend of mine was saying how his buddy left one with him for a while and he hit a bunch of buttons, got to the browser, and put on some porn which they apparently took quite a while figuring out how to turn off 😀
oh no how do i turn this off no please make it stop
It was Buddy Cole flavored porn
oh, HONEY!!!
But can it run Doom?
On the other hand, I just wrote a check for heating oil and put ‘2026’ for the year on the first try!
This is gonna be my year!!
A South American president*, two days ago (artist’s conception):
*legitimacy of office not guaranteed
I should amend that while I am sickened that we now live in a supposed democracy where the President has unchecked unilateral control over the military and can freely inflict regime change upon sovereign foreign nations at a whim without even providing the flimsiest of justifications to his supposedly co-equal branches of government, I *am* happy that this mission was accomplished with a minimum of bloodshed to Venezuelans, assuming you don’t count the rampant piracy we have been engaged in attempting to provoke a military response.
He’s gonna hold a seance in the new ballroom just so he can summon Nixon and gloat about how bombing Venezuela is so much more awesome than bombing Cambodia
Yeah, I don’t have any sympathy for Maduro, but the precedent is (steeples fingers to chin, reads David Brooks op-ed) troubling.
The only part of this that’s even a little bit new is the part where he’s openly flying Maduro to the US. Usually it would be a secret trip to a CIA black site
If I’m not mistaken, they also abducted Maduro’s wife. Which makes me think it’s not so much as an abduction as a negotisted abdication that ends with Maduro on house arrest somewhere in Mamdani’s fiefdom.
They call him Nicky from Jackson Heights now!
Corporate buyout, Caracas is gonna be one giant Trump hotel and golf course
How in the 2026 do you still need heating oil?
Wood too high tech for you?
Way too much work. A bunch of my friends use wood. I see what they go through every year.
I was proud of myself for getting up before 9:30, trying to get my addled sleep schedule back on track.
Now I’ve watched the news and I’m just going to go back to bed.
But there is hot Wolf on Ham accion!
/autocorrect made initially the wrong there/their, but doesn’t correct accion? Guess it sides with Venezuela.
I’ve got Brighton & Hove Albion, LLC, and Burnley.
Oh, hey, I can try out my watching tv in bed setup!
Indoors really is better in Chicago, and it’s still raining in California, but I really should go back tonight instead of pushing my flight again so I can check the mail and make sure vagrants haven’t broken in and run up a $200 electric bill by charging their phone for a few hours (fuck PG&E)
Oh West Ham, be the first one that loses to Wolfy please.
Rum Ham would like to subscribe to your newsletter!
As always, in my playing rotation:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWLdZFCMx8Y
The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves
The DOJ filed an indictment against Nicolás Maduro. The charges:
-funneling Venezuelan state funds to buy weapons for the Venezuelan armed forces
-sending José Altuve to Miami for a recon mission to find “decent pernil” ahead of the 2026 WBC
-demanding CITGO to make its oil exports extra sulphur-y
-complimenting Trump after he nationalized Intel and US Steel
-undermining US domestic policy by failing to supply the US’s staggering demand for cocaine and fentanyl
-endorsing Bad Bunny for the Owl’s Halftime Show
he’s always had a a grudge against Venezuela since Enya wouldnt show at his parties
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTrk4X9ACtw&list=RDLTrk4X9ACtw
Plus Maduro is a well-known ignoramus. Last week he confused the Monroe Doctrine with Teddy Roosevelt’s Big Stick Policy. What a dumbass amirite?
to make the winner of the FIFA World Peace prize lash out like this he must be!
raise your hand if you are coming around to the sense in Hippo’s 2026 World Cup boycott…
There could be Hunger Games type shit going on and I will still watch as I have an addiction. I crave the Egypt v Iran, Pride game in Seattle.
Look at it this way – the format was always going to be fuckety. Layer that on top of this pretty clearly being Hitler’s Berlin Olympiad?
But I won’r ruin it for the class, if anyone wants to take over Saturday threads this summer. But I won’t as much mention this assdickery once it kicks off. Not once.
So who is gonna be the FIFA Jesse Owens?
I was going to say, the FIFA Peace King award could be in jeopardy.
Now hang on, let’s see where this, (and literally any indictment, judicial or extrajudicial), against Jose Altuve goes.
It wasn’t until the second bullet point that I realized you weren’t serious.
(wakes up)
(turns on TV)
(sees US at war with Venezuela; setting the stage for WW3 in the Western Hemisphere)
(turns off TV; sets alarm for 2027)