Author: Horatio Cornblower

Horatio’s Big Stupid Mock Draft

Horatio Cornblower -
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Oh, hello.  Thanks for stumbling into my basement.  There's beer in the fridge and feel free to use the pool table.  No, not for that, just pool if you don't mind.  No, sorry, you can't use the dart board; I need it for my mock draft.  You see I "write"

Requiem For A Cat*

Horatio Cornblower -
93

The Chicago Bears this week announced that, after 8 years, they were forced to return Jay Cutler, quarterback and werecat, to the shelter where they got him.  The move is expected to save $2 million against the cap, although all parties agree that it is far too late to save

Your 2017 Daytona 500 Open Thread

Horatio Cornblower -
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My father-in-law is a big NASCAR fan.  Which is weird since he's in Southern California, (unless he's been washed away over the last week; come to think of it we should probably call), by way of Connecticut, neither of which are areas particularly known for rickets, poor dentistry, shitty beer

Your ‘Break Glass in Case of Emergency’ Because Scotchy Went A-Huntin’ Monday Night Open Thread.

Horatio Cornblower -
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Detroit (-7.5) at Dallas Dallas takes on Detroit in the House That Jerry Built With A Big Assist From Public Funds That Could Undoubtedly Have Been Put To Much Better Use But Fuck That Have You Seen How Big Our Video Screens Are? The Cowboys come in at 12-2, having found a

Your 2016 Tampa Bay Buccaneers: The Enthusiasm Isn’t The Only Thing That’s Infectious!

Horatio Cornblower -
7

Here's what I, a lifelong Dallas Cowboys fan, know about the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. And that about sums it up. I haven't paid attention to the Bucs since the days Dewey and Lee Roy Selmon ran around creating havoc in those classic creamsicle uniforms. You know that

Dallas Cowboys 2016: A Season Of Redemption & Donuts & Suspensions Oh My!

Horatio Cornblower -
44

You may remember that last year's initial preview was full of hope and optimism that this might be the year that Tony Romo's Dallas Cowboys would finally make some real noise in the play-offs, maybe even win the Super Bowl for the first time since 1995. The Cowboys had