2020 Quotables – Week 3 (Results)

blaxabbath - October 2, 2020October 2, 2020

What can I say? Regardless of the reason, Big Dick Vic refusing to shake hands after TNF is very 2020. Goodness -- if you aren't going to stand for the National Anthem or shake hands after the game, let's just do BattleBots. Plus they're all a bunch of thugs except

2020 Quotables – Week 3 (Submissions)

blaxabbath - September 29, 2020September 29, 2020

Did I "watch" football this weekend? Not really. A couple plays here and there but, overall, I didn't pick good games to broadcast on the teevee, it seems. Perhaps if [DFO] still offered those 506 maps, I could prepare a little better. No matter -- the important thing is everyone

2020 Quotables – Week 2 (Results)

blaxabbath - September 25, 2020September 25, 2020

I've never kept the NEXT GENERATION STATS on Quotables because, though I think there may be some interesting nuggets on the trends, no one writes me a check to keep them. That said, I think Matt Stafford feels like the most gif'ded player we present on here. I'm sure we've

2020 Quotables – Week 2 (Submissions)

blaxabbath - September 22, 2020September 22, 2020

New stadiums and injuries are all the talk, I understand, this season. Me? I recently found out I've been in a fantasy league I was not aware of and am 1-1. Am I Jeff Fischer? Well, can't argue with results. Again, minimal fan value in this season's gifs. Lots of weird

2020 Quotables – Week 1 (Results)

blaxabbath - September 18, 2020September 17, 2020

Not my kind of humour (dead hookers, interracial group sex jokes, and vilifying the wealthy -- c'mon!) but you all came through with [DFO]'s own brand of jokery this week. Not much to add on top of that; here at Quotables we let the talking do the talking! Hope you

2020 Quotables – Week 1 (Submissions)

blaxabbath - September 15, 2020September 14, 2020

Man, Quotables has historically gotten a lot of mileage out of fan shots. With the WUFLU stealing our 2nd Amendment or whatever, I'm leaning on you, the reader (who, I might remind you, is all in this together), to pick up the slack here. The good news though? It's pretty

Vital Contest Information! READ THIS NOW!

ballsofsteelandfury - September 9, 2020September 8, 2020

Have you ever wanted to own a gently-used Fleshlight? Have you ever wondered what it would feel like to have a gently-used Fleshlight displayed prominently on your mantle above the kids' Christmas stockings knowing that YOU WON IT?!? Well, wonder no more! We have three exciting contests for you

Horatio’s DFO 2020 Will Never End Mock Draft 2.0 And Open Thread

Horatio Cornblower - April 23, 2020April 23, 2020

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Greetings, fellow shut-ins. We like to use the term 'shut-ins' around here to mock our propensity for staying indoors on our various devices while talking about football, lesser football, boobs, butts, and why Trump sucks, but in truth these days we are all, with the rest of the world, literal

2019 Quotables – The Big Game (Results)

blaxabbath - February 9, 2020February 9, 2020

Hey all. So I kinda got tied up with #reallife stuff last week and didn't quite get your Quotables results out. Anyways, I just wanted to give a tip of the cap to all who contributed through this season. So good job. Your submissions are here and below are your

2019 Quotables – The Big Game (Submissions)

blaxabbath - February 4, 2020February 4, 2020

You know, the problem with Super Bowl week is that by Tuesday morning here, you've already seen all the gifs. So, in one regard, that sucks. In another, however, there should be no excuse for you all to end the season on a high note. ::Josh Gordon giggles:: So with that said,