Your “Eeny-Meeny-Miny-Mo” NFL Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - December 16, 2018

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Catch a tiger by the toe. Or a Giant. Or maybe a Packer. You know, one of those teams that have chances of making the playoffs in around the 2-5% mark. Watch them holler at the end of the day when they're officially eliminated from the holy grail that is

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Week 14, 2018 Season

King Hippo - December 10, 2018December 10, 2018

Having my brief sanity break last Sunday and Monday, I found an opportunity (in response to a GREAT Christopher Liss column - if not a paid subscriber to Rotowire, you really should consider signing up before your next draft/auction) to examine, then articulate my answer to the age-old query: Why Do

JV NFL – Special Shame Friday Edition

King Hippo - November 23, 2018

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Good hangover and fat shame morning, Commentist Party members! The footy gods are kind today, at least. /also LMFAO at Colt McCoy Texas at Kansas (Noon, FS1) All the Steerfuckers have to do is beat Waiting-on-Les-Miles to make the conference title match. Can they possibly fuck this up? Houston at Memphis (Noon, ABC) In case

Your ” Three Loss-a-Palooza” Sunday Night Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - November 18, 2018November 18, 2018

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To borrow from that Lightfoot song that everyone knows, in northern Ontario the winds of November come early. I use that to my advantage. Earlier in the spring I noticed a guy talking to himself by the corner store. I was waiting while my wife was playing her 'special numbers'.

Your “I Guess I’ll Watch-It’s Not Like I’ve Got A Vibrant Social Life” NFL Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - November 18, 2018

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Hey gang. I don't see anything in this slate of games that makes the hair on my saggy balls stand on end. But all of us have been down this road before. It's not the 'meh-level' that matters-it's the *experience* that matters. ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN! And anything usually does. So let's

Your “I’m So Eveready For This Game!” Sunday Night Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - November 11, 2018November 11, 2018

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He didn't look any different than any of the other broken fellas that jumped into the back of my pickup in the Home Depot parking lot that sunny but chilly Tuesday morning. He had steel-toed boots and what looked like a strong back and that was good enough for me.

Your “Blowouts As Far As The Eye Can See” Sunday Morning NFL Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - November 11, 2018

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If you feel like chatting about the Chelsea/Everton tilt whilst we wait for the good stuff, go on ahead. There's also a Rugby World Cup qualifying match taking place between Canada and Kenya that's being played in Marseille, France. I don't have a clue whether it's live, a replay from

Continuing With Novembring – JV NFL Open Thread

King Hippo - November 10, 2018November 10, 2018

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I have no overriding theme this week, as work beat mah cracker brains to a pulp this week. Here are some fixtures: TCU at West By God Virginia (Noon, FS1) Nobody does "letdown performance after emotional win" quite like Fuckers du Cousins. Then again, Bloodeyes actually lost to goddamned Kansas. As did

Your “Pour Me Some Of That Giggle Juice, Dollface” Thursday Night Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - November 8, 2018

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There's a ton of NFL news today if you look for it... Dez Bryant: The newest employee of the New Orleans Saints hasn't, to anyone's knowledge, burned any bridges with a single one of his teammates as of 6pm EST! Darren Sproles: He aggravated his teeny, weeny hamstring today. There you have it. TO THE

Donks at the 2018 Bye – Regrets, We’ve Had a Few

King Hippo - November 8, 2018November 8, 2018

Alas, the Swag Wagon is empty, after a certain somebody stumbled crunk out of Von Miller's Halloween party and into a total stranger's abode. Now, we sit idle at 3-6, losers of 6 of our last 7. That one win? The memorable slaughter of Birdcano on TNF. So...yeah. Hardly a

A Glass of Champagne and the ’72 Dolphins: Educating youths of a tradition never discussed

Wakezilla - November 5, 2018August 14, 2019

“When you go to history, let’s go into history. Don’t just go to your history. Let’s go to the history. Or don’t go into history at all. If you going to go back there, we can go back there. Or we can stay right here. … This is what they

Your “We Aren’t Family!” Sunday Night NFL Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - November 4, 2018November 4, 2018

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Outside of Aaron and his family no one much knows why he and his family are estranged. In tonight's episode of Wildly Irresponsible Speculation, I thought I/you (down below) might throw some ideas together as to the reasons. I'll use some of my own experiences and those of people in