Media Whoring ‘Fessing Up: Sunday Preseason Thread

Perhaps I’ve had occasion to express to you that I am a fan of the NFL. And I can no longer bear the weight of my secret perfidy because you certainly deserve better. So here goes: throughout the DFO Era, which will start its TENTH fitbaw season in a coupla

Saturation Saturday (Early Edition)

Muy buenos días, ladies and degenerates, minors without parental supervision, sociopaths all. I will be subbing this AM because King Hippo picked this weekend to cram all the continuing Donks re-education courses, per Sean Payton’s overhaul of the franchise into a constitutional theocracy. Hippo showed me some Powerpoint slides, and

Wednesday Motivational: Apologies

When I’m at peak misanthropy, I wonder about all the importance given to apologies. Nobody’s perfect, everyone says. It’s an accepted truth, such as “people make mistakes”, “shit happens”, “I’m a Gemini”, and other gems of exculpation. And sure, admitting being wrong is a big ask: Who the hell wants to

Wednesday Motivational: Try Again

The Arizona Cardinals were one thing I liked about the 2023 season. They started the legend of Black Powder (nickname of the season), three of their four wins were against playoff teams (DAL, PIT & PHI), and got Kyler Murray back. Murray looks fine to either start or trade. Arizona

Wednesday Motivational: Xmas Music Special

Hello hello. Happy Holidays, which I wish earnestly. Not everybody celebrates Christmas, but nobody is clear from its tornado of consumerism and reliculous traditions. Stores get crowded, traffic gets worse and everywhere you go, there it is, again: Xmas music, melodious browbeating of JESUS, BUY, CHRIST, PAY, LORD and so

Wednesday Motivational: Appreciate, Reflect, Repeat.

Good morning, folks. I’m stepping in for tWBS in writing this Motivational because he’s still dead. Three years… Wow. Luv ya man [pours black coffee over kitchen ants]. I think about tWBS at least weekly, on account of his commitment to post something positive every Wednesday, even when he didn't want

2023 Titans Buh Bye Report

If you’ve been online this week, you certainly caught all the flowers and blowjobs thrown at Eagles GM Howie Roseman. He traded for Safety Kevin Byard, two-time NFL All Pro and, in Tennessee, the bluest chip for the Titans between 2017-2022. I like Roseman, an Iggles numbers man since 2000. He

CFL Beat: Week 10

Well, hello. Your friendly neighboUrhood Maestro is on sabbatical in Europe with Lady Maestro. You get me for a sub on this instalment of CFL Beat, for which I gladly volunteered my talent. Which won’t be necessary after all. Maestro, being generous and dutiful, left a post skeleton (great), and