Earlier today, the Chicago Bears traded DE/LB/Mullet Enthusiast Jared Allen to the Carolina Panthers. Had to be a good deal, right? According to the WWL: "The Bears will pay $11.5 million of Allen's salary, while the Panthers will pay him $823,000, sources told ESPN. The Bears will get a conditional pick
Tag: NFL
A Brief Liturgical Interlude
[Scene: Interior of a Temple in Bristol, Connecticut. Eight large men are gathered in the first two rows, speaking reverently in hushed tones.] Nate Ebner: Good Yontiv, boys! Mark Herzlich: Gmar Tov, and I hope everyone is having an easy fast. Good Yontiv. Geoff Schwartz: Thanks to everyone for coming today. As you
The DFO Interview: Scott Hanson
DFO, Money Comes In – Week 2
As we mentioned last week, Week One games are notoriously difficult to predict. Given that, I say that WhyEaglesWhy's and my performance of basically breaking even should be commended. Who knew the Vikings would suck as much ass as Amabella (image NSFW, but worth the click) ? As for King Hippo's and
DFO, Money comes in
As I had mentioned earlier, it is high time that we all received some highly dubious but yet highly profitable (MAYBE!) gambling advice from an invisible internet friend or two. As someone who has a lifetime gambling record of having won more than lost, I feel I am qualified to
Your 2015 Jacksonville/London Jaguars
You know, when the Jaguars make the eventual move to London, it will be a VERY smooth transition. The locals will already be familiar with a product that pretends to be great but inevitably breaks down, costs you an arm and a leg, but which you will support because it's
Bucs Preview with #CaptainWarrenSapp
[Dfo-claimer: This preview should be read at high volumes. Preferably in a residential area. Welcome aboard.] Captain's Cabin Door Flies Open Warren Sapp: YAARRR Mateys! Welcome to Captain Warren Sapp's 2015 Tampa Bay Bucs preview! I'm ye scurvy dawgs Captain, Warren Sapp. Joining me in this parlay as always is my faithful
There’s Something Rotten in Ashburn
An Earnest Conversation
INTERIOR: Steelers Locker Room, post-practice, Tuesday, August 25, 2015 BEN: GREAT PRACTICE GUYS! WE REALLY LOOKING GOOD OUT THERE! THE BEN GONE HAVE A CHOCOTACO TO CELEBRATE! /Mike Tomlin walks over to Ben MT: Ben, I think you've met him before, but I want to take you over here to formally introduce you
2015 Pittsburgh Stillers Preview
WCS, Sill, and I (Balls) decided to collaborate on this preview to save all of you non-Steeler fans the agony and depression of going through three separate previews talking about the team that everyone would hate if the Patriots didn't exist. For your amusement, here are our thoughts: SILL There are three
Balls of Steel’s AFL Beat – Special Finals Preview
I am posting this deep into the night on Thursday so that you, devoted AFL viewers and readers, can read it prior to the thrilling matchup between Sydney and Collingwood! Who am I kidding? This will basically function as the Open Thread on Friday morning. Hey, at least you'll learn something
Fans in the Woods: 2015 Chicago Bears Preview
2015 DFO Chicago Bears Preview A Conversation Between Cuntler and BrettFavresColonoscopy, moderated by Jeff Joniak Jeff Joniak: Hey there, sports fans, welcome to the first ever Chicago Bears preview on Door Flies Open! I’m Jeff Joniak, voice of the Chicago Bears while you’re tailgating or at home and need to listen to