Pick Is In – A [DFO] 2016 Draft Challenge LIVE Results Post

So we’ve made it to the first major event of the 2016 NFL season, the first round of the draft is tonight! As we are reminded that coaches, general managers, and meddling owners are the real stars of this league, we will also use this event to be introduced to the latest class of well-dressed athletes who, in as soon as four years even, may be budding stars preparing to be training camp hold outs insisting on new contracts, early retirees, or simply journeymen professionals chasing their athletic dreams.

Remember about a month ago when the draft universe was upside-down? The top two picks, Tennessee and Cleveland, presumably pleased with their quarterback situations (because nothing says “nah, we’re good at QB” like having a top draft pick), were expected to kick off the draft with unsexy upgrades to their non-existent lines. Boltman and Ol’ Double-J would then get some screen time before perpetual top-five picker Jacksonville would bring aboard someone with high upside who won’t make it to the preseason without getting an injury that will land him on the season-ending IR. Also, the P*triot’s didn’t have a first round pick because they had tampered with game balls and got caught. But that didn’t matter because, with Tom Brady for 16 weeks, this team didn’t need a first round pick to get off to a hot start.

Well, now our draft universe is upside-down for other reasons. The Los Angeles Rams of Raider Nation announced that their “philosophy has always been to build through the draft” before sending six of their first seven picks over the next two years to Tennessee in exchange for the right to pick first tonight. Who will they take? Well, RAMIT insiders haven’t decided yet. Not to be outdone — by LA or their previous regime — the Philadelphia Eagles gave up eight picks to earn the right to draft whoever gets rejected by the guys who assembled a 2015 QB depth chart of Nick Foles, Case Keenum, and Sean Mannion. Laremy Tunsil, the projected top pick before Tennessee traded down, is set to lose at least $1.5 million on his rookie contract as a result of these trades. Also, the P*triot’s still don’t have a first round pick because they had tampered with game balls and got caught. Also, they lost Tom Brady for the first four weeks of the season, including their Sunday Night Football home opener where Chris and Al will have to talk about Brady being out because he’s a cheater even though they don’t want to talk about Brady’s history of cheating.

Now, for everyone who submitted on Pick Is In, tonight is also judgement day for you. That’s right, click below to open the official [DFO] Draft Challenge Prediction Board, turn on the television, and get ready to weep.
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I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
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ThursdaySkyGoddess

The Ginger Hammer really knows how to pick his boo shields.

LeighAnne

Goodell: “I brought a dying kid. Stop booing.”

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Fans: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Horatio Cornblower

“How will Paxton Lynch fit in to the Broncos’ offense?”

“Well he’s tall and basically not ready for the NFL, so you’ll never even know Brock Osweiler is gone.”

Gratliff

HOly fuck. Are they not through the first round yet?

Fuck bowties.

That wasn’t directed at the make a wish kid

This clarification caused me to spit beer all over my monitor. Thanks.

Horatio Cornblower

AWWWWWWKWARD

Moonbatting Average

I step away from the TV for one goddamn second and this shit happens

King Hippo

I BLAME YOU NOW

King Hippo

TRADING A GODDAMNED THIRD ROUNDER TOO??

Beastmode Ate My Baby

comment image

Horatio Cornblower

Peter King has resumed tweeting after his unfortunate “I smell a shocker here” got him a “bosa deez nutz” reply from our own makeitsnow, after which he mercifully shut up for a couple of hours.

But he’s back at it, so go get him Snow.

ssi_bulldawg

I’m surprised y’all haven’t broken the site yet.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

We tried. If I had been tried harder and spammed pics it might have broke. I put the blame on the site still working on me

ssi_bulldawg

You and Moose. Y’all have been on your best/worst behavior. I guess is depends on how you look at it.

Gratliff

Oh hey. Forgot about all this. Guess I shouldn’t have started marathon watching The Man in the High Castle.

makeitsnowondem

OH SHIT IT’S LYNCH

King Hippo

fuck all the fucks in the goddamned fucking goddamned universe

King Hippo

NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GODDAMNIT, DENVER

Smithchez

Hey, the first Cane!

Watch out Abel.

ThursdaySkyGoddess

I don’t think I saw any Miami games, so I don’t even know if I should feel indifferent to this pick.

WCS

Hey, can’t be as pointless as Cortez Allen, right?

RIGHT?

The Mighty Feklahr

More like Fartie amirite?

King Hippo

To his friends its Artie, but to you its Mister Burns!

WCS

I was saying Booooo-urns!

/Cincy took Jackson III first

Horatio Cornblower

What if the Bengals accidentally took William Jackson II? Would the father have to play?

Doktor Zymm

He’s probably not draft eligible.

So is Mike Brown the most parsimonious owner in sports?

WCS

Fucking Bengals.

Brocky

Two to tangle eh Chris?

Lets just ignore Pittsburgh once again getting away with shit other teams would get crucified for

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

As overrated as Treadwell is, he’s already the SECOND best WR that Teddy’s had in the NFL.

The Mighty Feklahr

What if Seahox take Henry for BM 2.0? (get it?)

King Hippo

hee hee, BM is always #2!!

Doktor Zymm

“You suffered horrible pain and injury, tell us why injuries are good!”

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Horrible interviews all night by her

Doktor Zymm

I don’t know that she comes up with the questions, but yeah, I’ve winced more than once.

King Hippo

Cincy seems like they might fuck Denver out of Nkemdiche.

Moonbatting Average

Doctson! We’ve got Doctson here! See? Nobody cares

Duchess

Horatio Cornblower

Deion Sanders almost told that 3 year old she was going to get a lot of cool shit.

Duchess

cool shit cocaine

theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

Just don’t piss of AP little girl and you’ll be fine.

Covalent Blonde

Woo! OT booze here I come!

Doktor Zymm

Cardinals did a good with Tyriann Mathieu, maybe they can have the patience to rehab Jack’s knee?

Teddy's Bridge Over Troubled Water

[Door flies open]
LAQUOOOOOON!
[Slams door]

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Tired of turning track runners into WRs, Vikings decided to get a WR with ZERO speed.

Horatio Cornblower

“Hey, what was Treadwell’s 40 time?”

“Lemme put it his way, we used a sundial.”

King Hippo

Shit getting real for the Donks. Myles Jack, the MLB from Roll Damn Tide, AND Nkemdiche are all still on the board. HIPPO LIKEY.

Horatio Cornblower

/Broncos trade the pick to Cleveland

King Hippo

NO SMIRE

Doktor Zymm

THERE’S A RUN ON WIDE RECEIVERS, QUICK, GET ONE NOW, OR THERE WILL BE NO MORE WIDE RECEIVERS EVER!!!!!!!

entropy

Jets pick didn’t really move me, one way or the other, so I’m glad I spent my time working on this instead:

comment image

Covalent Blonde

Wow. Stunning.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Nice!

entropy

Thank you.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

I’d post my latest photomanip, but it has boobies and I’d get yelled at.

entropy

Not by me. But, I am still on the DFO mailing list thigamabob, you want to send it to me.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Here, I’ll try this:

h
ttp://pre14.deviantart.net/c9bd/th/pre/f/2016/109/d/1/where_there_s_smoke____by_zombotronic-d9zj7wl.png

entropy

DUDE! That is awesome. I am a fan of both the image and the model.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Thanks! Not my model, but the guy who took the photo does some really great stock photo work.

Horatio Cornblower

That’s the most accurate representation of Roger Goodell’s soul I’ve ever seen.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Good Hustle.
Seriously….you got talent.
But I’d like to see Laremy Tunsil buying weed from the Arachnosaur(?) at some point.

entropy

Thanks, man! Always nice to get requests… although now that I’ve managed to get myself back INTO the drawing, I’m gonna finish up Moose’s illo, the Rey one I have in pencil over on my tumblr site, and then I may draw Gas Mask Tunsil rampaging through a Frito’s plant, with the Tarantasaurus on a leash behind him.

King Hippo

Woulda taken Doctson over Jack if I was Minny, but NAWT Treadwell.

Covalent Blonde

I need to make a drink, but I can’t look away from this game.

Doktor Zymm

This is why we need robot butlers. Monkey butlers are fine, but not worth the time it takes to train them.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Now’s your chance….run, run, run!!!!!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Offsides seems to no longer be a rule in the NHL.

theeWeeBabySeamus

So I haven’t been following the draft board close after SD fucked shit up.
Did anyone score more than 20 pts?

Horatio Cornblower

I think I’m at -5.

King Hippo

YEP! I got 1, 2, and 5 right. Also “first QB” duh. Then fuckall.

Horatio Cornblower

I’d have about 40 more points but I mixed up Goff and Wentz because I am a moron.

Duchess

Who looked more underwhelmed? Doctson or Coleman?

Shogun Marcus

I want to say Yes?

Doktor Zymm

I’m okay with that. I will drink the large measure of Korean medicinal brandy I poured in tentative celebration, rather than consolation with an eye towards forgetfulness.

King Hippo

Why the shit did Redacteds trade down to a team taking a WR when they were also gonna take one??

Duchess

probably going to take him any way and got an extra pick out of it?

Doktor Zymm

That’s my theory. Or they rated them as equal. I find it hard to believe that they employed strategery to get the trade offer, but I see them benefiting.

King Hippo

maybe they asked who HOU planned to take before they agreed?

Spur

Doctson is kinda small. Fast but small.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Zymm…happy?

Glorious Chairman Dan

I’m not. We need defense defense defense…

WCS

She should be. Doctson is will be a GODDANGED STAR.

King Hippo

He’s my favourite skill player in the draft by a mile.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

“FavoUrite”? SECRET CANADIAN! SECRET CANADIAN IN THE BUILDING!

Shogun Marcus

Check his syrup levels and healthcare!

King Hippo

I started using the extra “u” on my Everton forum to be a good guest, and then decided that I just really liked it with certain words. Same with listing the date like “28 April”

Horatio Cornblower

Why do you hate ‘Murica?

Don T

That Month First bullshit makes zero sense. Fucking Illuminati.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Pens penalty killing has been stellar in crunch time.
Assholes.

Covalent Blonde

It’s both true and upsetting.

Shogun Marcus

So…sill still gone? No matter the how’s and why’s, etc., it saddens me.

Smithchez

What happened to Sill?

He had one of his angry meltdowns and is taking a sabbatical.

The Mighty Feklahr

🙁 shit happens I hope he knows we still love him.

King Hippo

we do, just also a little afraid he might murder us in our sleep sometimes.

Duchess

I like this pick… not because i wrote the preseason and mid season posts on the Texans… but because I called this pick in the draft pool.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Sooooo, see you all for round two?

Covalent Blonde

I want to say yes, but the truth is I will care intermittently, then realize draft picks will ultimately make or break none of our teams, and then flip over to watch hockey while feeling my gastric ulcer proliferate with each passing period.

King Hippo

Day Two is even better than Day One.

Doktor Zymm

I second this. Round two is where the real shit happens.

Horatio Cornblower

Mark Davis is willing to contribute $500 million towards a new Las Vegas stadium, because that’s how much he’s saved on haircuts over the years.

...

Well, he does have a penchant for traveling long distance to spend money on bowl-related things.

Don T

Those $500 million come from selling relics of Al Davis’ tracksuits and bones to North Korea.