Your “We Are All Jags Fans Today” AFC Championship Game Open Thread

Are you ready? Last Sunday was oh-so-glorious and I’m not sure how it can be topped but the bowels of my being are telling me it will be. Perhaps that’s last night’s chili talking, I’ve no idea. What the heckfire am I waiting for? TO THE GAME!

Jacksonville/New England:

Some football fans down Florida way are talking about The Coughlin Effect transforming this team. “So what is The Coughlin Effect?”, you may ask. Well, as a Giants fan I can tell you it involves not wearing hats in meetings, setting the clocks in the practice facility five minutes ahead and treating any and all injuries with bloodletting-you know, basic crotchety old man stuff. I’ve no doubt that when he was first told that players were kneeling during the anthems his gut reaction was to foam at the mouth.

Injuries:

Tom Brady has some stitches in his paw-paw. Will he play? (yes) Will he wear a glove? (maybe) Will it affect his game? (no) Do I like question marks? (most assuredly)

Stratergizering:

Rumour has it that Adele would like to see Jalen Ramsay on the Gronkster but the Jags D usually covers te’s with a safety (Church/Gipson) or Myles Jack. Besides the fact that Ramsey is out-weighed by a good fifty pounds, what of Brandin Cooks? I can’t see the Jags pulling something special out of their game plan hat today.

Here’s a Problem:

Their names are Hurns, Westbrook, Cole and Lee. That’s not the name of a law firm, that’s the Jags receiving corpse. If the team falls behind by two scores it’s not going to be pretty. That said, I think the speedy Westbrook just might grab a TD on some sort of trickery dickery dock.

Old Adage is old:

War. Won. Trenches. You know how it goes but if Jacksonville’s d-line of Ngakoue, (another strip-sack maybe?) Campbell, Jackson, Dareus and Fowler play as they have been recently the timing that Brady & Co. depend so much upon will be jiggered and they’ll be out of their comfort zone.

Have at ‘er darlings-it’s all yours now.

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The Maestro

JAMES HARRISON, DESTROYER OF UNIVERSES

Gratliff

oh my fuck

...

Jesus.

I HATE JAMES HARRISON WHY WON’T SOMEONE MAKE HIS SKULL CONCAVE

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Zombie James Harrison

I hate you all

Gatoraids

He is well rested

King Hippo

you shitass

Romonobyl

Pleeeeeease Jags, don’t make me have to cheer for the Eagles.

Duchess

Tpo Soon with the Zombie… Gronks still in the arena

blaxabbath

They were talking about Odin Lloyd.

Gratliff

ZAHHHHHMBY ZAHHHHHHHHHMBY

fleshwound_NPG

wow, not a handoff on 1st down

Spur

NO!!!!!!! run on 1st down!

Redshirt

I’ll give Romo credit. He’s equally excited for both sides.

Romonobyl

Just like a female porn star.

...

DON’T YOU FUCKERS PLAY THE CRANBERRIES

Gatoraids

Grumble grumble I’ll linger in your mother

Gatoraids

There will be Bortles. Can already feel my milkshake be dranken

clint greasewood

Jags probably going to kneel it

LemonJello

Engage “Meat Tenderizer Protocol” and just injure every. fucking. P*triot both on and off the field, Jaguras.

Redshirt

See what happens when the Bengals don’t make the Postseason.

tomsellecksmoustache

They don’t get to lose to Pittsburgh????

Redshirt

Yes, but take them out in the process.

ThePirateSloth

Well, at least i can laugh at Eagles fans already brawling WITH THEMSELVES outside the Linc

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Just back from skiing. The guys on the radio seemed to think refereeing may have played a part in this comeback.

Horatio Cornblower

Love to say so, but no. Poor playcalling by Jaguars, on both sides, is mostly to blame.

DontHair

AMENDOLAW CAWT THAT BAWL LIKE ONE-AH THA DAHHKIES. BRADY/BELI 2020 WHITEHOUSE

Petronel

Romo: “Belichick ecstatic”…Tony, I think I love you just a little.

makeitsnowondem

I wish I’d had as many tequila shots as Tony Romo has.

Dick E. Phuck

“Hand it off on 1st down. They’ll never see it coming.”
-Doug Marrone

Old School Zero

This is always the end result of playoff martyball

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Eh, if they hadn’t done it themselves the refs would have found a way to do it for them.

Spur

Well Bort, you wanna shut us all up?

blaxabbath

Why isn’t 39 jamming his helmet into amendola’s chest there?

King Hippo

there is no justice, there is no hope

Duchess

Play action for 75 yrds on the first play

tomsellecksmoustache

All you had to do was push his honkey ass out

...

“Did you think anything else was gonna happen there?”

GODDAMN IT

Horatio Cornblower

But did they leave too much time on the clock for Blake Bortles?, is a question that absolutely no one is asking right now.

Gatoraids

Romo entering the Gruden zone

Petronel

THAT IS A GODDAMN CATCH

Dick E. Phuck

Ugh, Can this not happen again, please?

Old School Zero

Another big gain for the underdog white males!

Duchess

When will Rich White guys catch a break in this country?

theeWeeBabySeamus

I have to say, that was a helluva catch.
I don’t like it, but it was. Helluva throw and catch.

They aren’t a dynasty for nothing.

blaxabbath

Cheating helps

King Hippo

I hate white people.

SonOfSpam

We all do.

tomsellecksmoustache

Fuck the world

The Maestro

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Gratliff

ugggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggh

...

*sighs*

Romonobyl

A trip to the Super Bowl rides on the shoulders of Blake Bortles.

What were the odds of me saying something like that last August?

DontHair

Or ever again

Horatio Cornblower

Jack and Dareus out? Oh yeah, Jags are doing great!

ThePirateSloth

comment image?itemid=5440285

King Hippo

All things are shit. All things will always be shit. Hopefully, when we die, there will at least be rest.

Brocky

Faking injuries has no place in professional sports.

Patriots should be fined for all the non sense with Brady’s hand this week

Old School Zero

Never watch football.

Horatio Cornblower

“OK”
-Stevie Wonder

Spur

2nd half play-calling killed the Jags.

blaxabbath

Listen that crowd booing Mueller!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hey Todd Haley??? You just saw that, right?

herodotus450

Yeah but did Todd have an undersized, aging, injured quarterback?