Well well… WELL. This being a Sunday afternoon, Hate Week is no more.
Via reactiongifs.us
And yet, the Patriots are in the Super Bowl, again. No. 1 seed in the AFC against the Iggles, No. 1 seed in the NFC. Philadelphia is riding a weekend high, after the Hall of Fame selection of Brian Dawkins. And Terrell Owens; say what you will about T.O. (there’s plenty). The guy balled.
John Clayton, 2/6/05 via espn.com
That was back in Super Bowl XXwhatever. This time around, Philadelphia has a damn fine roster, notably better than New England’s—in most positions. The one really at stake, well…
Tron Brady: what has NOT being said about him? I heard talk about his career thoroughly eclipsing those of all-time NFL greats, to the point that Brady’s true peers are in other sports—like Gordie Howe, Michael Jordan, or Barry Bonds.
The coaching: what has not being said about Bill Belichick. His assistants have been living the life, getting the Pats to the Super Bowl while being the presumptive new head coaches of the Clots (Josh McDaniels) and Loins (Matt Patricia). Losing to this Eagles team will not hurt their bona fides.
On the Philly sideline, QB coach John DeFilippo has gotten interest from several teams. Super Bowl host Minnesota needs a new offensive coordinator, so DeFlip can’t ask for a better Pro Day. The way Foles stepped aside around the pocket against the Vikings D in the last game bodes well for the coach and QB.
The focus on the Eagles has been on making a game plan that Nick Foles would execute without difficulty, putting success in the hands of Agholor, Ajayi, Blount, Ertz, and Jeffrey. They good. Shit, even Torrey Smith can still force a defense to account for him. So Foles has options, but the question remains: what will he do when confronted with the chance to audible?
Via giphy.com
Eagles defensive coordinator Jim Schwartz, this guy,
via giphy.com
has also been updating his résumé. He’s got a dynamite roster too, including Chris Long—who won the Super Bowl last year with New England. With LeGarrette Blount providing the debriefing for the Pats offense, I’d say the Iggles got prettay, prettay good mojo going into the game. A shame it’s played in the Birdmurderdome.
via usatoday.com
So the NFC aviary has been owned in Super Bowls of late, with the Pats doing most of the damage. Big deal. I think the Eagles break the hex, 27-24, and the promise of a New Era will carry us through the goddamn offseason.
Then again, this is New England. Any HATAHs might wanna try something stronger than alcohol.
via luckymojo.com
Last day of the season! Let it out.
Go for two.
Ohno Ohno Ohno Ohno Ohno Ohno Ohno Ohno Ohno Ohno
Dear Corporate America: how about you just lower your prices, or raise the wages of your employees, and let us decide which charities to support?
Fuck my heart is racing
How does Tom Brady’s cum taste, Cris!? You Motherfucker!
Why?!
“[dumb chuckle]… this game has been as good as Justin Timberlake!”
-Cris
[shoots self]
This is all going to end badly.
This is all going to end badly.
This is all going to end badly.
This is all going to end badly.
This is all going to end badly.
It is written
Life in The Darkest Timeline. Turn the page, set your alarm, it just gets shittier tomorrow!
SOMEONE MURDER CRIS
This is crazy town
If anyone murders Cris after that “this game has been as good as Justin Timberlake” comment there is no jury in the world that would convict.
Oh please just get mouthAIDS Cris.
“This game has been as great as Justin Timberlake!”
Wow Cris, what did this game do to you?
So many HAWT TAKES this Super Bowl commercial season. Cancer, Bad?! Athletes, Good?! America, we like it?! DAMN! HAWT!
Martin Luther King was a hero to the white middle class was white hot
I hate you Cris. I hate you.
Folks. We all knew how this was going to end. Just brace yourself now.
Buy Hyundai cure cancer. Got it.
Well, off to drive my Subaru into a tree!
They just showed Foles’ wife. If this was Top Chef he’d be fucked.
So buying a Hyundai cures cancer? Good to know.
This has been fantastic but it may kill me.
Please let this end with a Brady INT.
Guys I hope Tonya Harding finally gets the win this year.
Lily Foles has been calling the plays for the Eagles’ secondary tonight.
Awww… a wee Foles.
A lot of “inspirational” ads this year. I like “funny” more.
It’s an Olympics year.
We need more cat herding commercials. That was good shit back then.
All this Cris love on Harrison is obvious. He secretly loved him but as a Steeler or Bengal, it was taboo.
Now that he’s a Patriot, he’s unloading all the pint up “love” in one game.
Please tell me that Hyundai didn’t really take families into a backroom at an airport without telling them what was going on
I’m going to cry no matter what. That prop is decided.
I own a Ford, so I guess I support cancer.
Well, we’ve reached the stage of the game where someone other than Tom Brady fakes an injury.
I heard Hyundai was pro child cancer
At this point I’m an amateur child cancer. I’m hoping to get better.
Agholor is my favorite making sportscasters learn how to spell guy
Foles has been doing it his entire life, Cris, you dumb shit. He’s a professional football player.
Just run the ever living shit out of the clock
Super Bowl LII may come down to the foot of the Cincinnati Bengals 5th Round Draft Pick.
May God help us all!
Don’t rely on the kicker…Don’t rely on the kicker…Don’t rely on the kicker…Don’t rely on the kicker…Don’t rely on the kicker…Don’t rely on the kicker…Don’t rely on the kicker…Don’t rely on the kicker…
So, the P*ts are winning by a field goal, right?
YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH!!!!
Bleed the clock, please.
/black blood streams from eyes
Y E S
Foles putting it in every tight hole.
I can not wrap my head around how good Foles is playing
Harrison got held on that play.
Fuck you Bill Simmons.
It’s called Sill Bimmons.
Did Collinsworth just say the Eagles should have printed? Jesus
of course, he wants NE to win
I am losing my mind.
It’s gonna be 1 and 1, Pats by 1, isnt’ it?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRnKvXqti6M
MOAR YARDS PLEASE!
SHUT THE FUCK UP CRIS
Finally, an opinion I can agree with.
This should be the 11th commandment.
Right up the middle?
https://youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=sz0VFa_4JwM
I was expecting marx brothers
Eli wasn’t invited to Universal Studios?
Too many rides with a height requirement.
He snuck off to Lego Land
Andres Cantor with the mic drop?
I am proud of the fact that I never drink Coke and haven’t for decades.
I don’t drink pop, soda or whatever. My boys have grown up thinking it’s a treat, like ice cream.