Recently, while on the beach, I spied a group of a half dozen or so lovely young ladies. Shut up, I said “spied”, not “stalked”.
Nonetheless, there they were right before me. I couldn’t exactly not look. Some were swimming, some were sunning. They seemed to be having a nice time. Good for them.
At one point, one of these young ladies walked past where I was sitting, headed away from the beach toward the boardwalk area. She was a petite girl, attractive, and seemingly having fun with her friends at the water’s edge. No idea why she was headed toward the boardwalk. Maybe she had to take a leak (or whatever), none of my business. But as she passed, I couldn’t help but notice “things”.
The swimsuit she was wearing should have fit her. As I said, she was fairly petite. But either she, or whomever picked it out for her, hadn’t taken into account her “measurements”. For a small girl, she was well-endowed. Let’s put it that way. Probably D-cups at least. And she was barely topping out at 5 feet tall.
Now while I won’t sit here and lie and say I don’t like boobs…because I totally do…boob SIZE is not terribly important to me and never has been. Shut up and stop looking at me like that, I’m serious.
But as this girl passed within mere feet of where I was seated on the beach, I couldn’t help but notice. It may or may not have looked a little something like this…
Now again, honestly…boob size does not matter to me one way or another. But I have to admit that there was something rather…let’s say “enticing”…about the visual that day. Under different circumstances, I must admit it was enticing to the point I might have even spoken to this young lady.
I mean, not to tell her how great her tits looked falling out of an undersized swimsuit, even though they did. I’m not that stupid. But there was a definite attractive quality there. Given my circumstances at the time however (I was not exactly alone at the beach, let’s put it that way), I did not speak to the young lady.
But the image stayed in my mind. As well as its effect on me, and several other guys on the beach I noticed. Several heads were turning, eyes following her as she made her way to the boardwalk area.
So, that’s where this week’s theme comes from.
IT’S SIDE BOOB WEEK EVAHBODEH!!!!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDk3tKm5Usw
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Stanley Cup Finals
Ahem…..
I really thought the Caps were gonna make me sweat this one out at least one moar game and I’d have to write some sort of creative yet humble crap here foar tonight.
But….no.
Sorry Vegas. Sincerely. Your story this season was amazing. I honestly would not have begrudged if you’d won three straight to take it.
OK, that’s a lie. But I would have gotten over it. Eventually.
But no shit, Vegas was amazing this year.
Give ’em a hand. Seriously….
OK, now shut up.
Because it’s time for the Caps to go on the quest foar the repeat…
Get me two….
I’m never satisfied?
NO, YOU’RE NEVER SATISFIED!!!!!!!!!
–
Side Boob!!!!!
Enjoy….
OK, that’s enough of that.
–
The Other Side
I had considered an “equal time” section this week, but there is still a double standard on such things….
Maybe next week.
Orrrrrr….probably not.
Have a nice weekend, everyone.
Love ya’s.
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Do you have a “request” or an idea for a future TGISF theme? Drop me a line…
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We doing DFOcon this year?
Can a team offer a player part ownership of the team? Because that is the only conceivable way (other than loyalty to city or keeping Family at home) I can see LeBron staying in Cleveland.
I’m at an airport (shocking I know) and feeling a littttttle drunk
I’m not picking you up at LaGuardia. Last time I picked someone up there PAPD and EMS were involved. No, seriously.
Cheers to thats
Take em all, take em all, put em up against a wall and shoot em. Short and tall, watch em fall, cmon boys take em all
OK, so a possum just scared the living shit out of me on the back deck.
Yes, tWBS still lives in the sticks.
Possums are the best. They eat all the shitty vermin you really don’t want, like ticks.
This one was eating crackers my niece failed to “get the distance” on when throwing them to ducks earlier.
I almost tripped over the little bastard.
That’s a win (except for the tripping bit)
It was the angry hissing which elevated my heart rate.
I’ll be turning the light on from now on.
Fair
Was it the big one?
And if so is his name Bitey?
Game 5 (if nec.)
Game 6 (if nec.)
“if nec.” must be Latin for “if monkeys fly out of our asses”
I haven’t seen any compelling reason so far that Game 4 is even necessary.
Or 1, 2, or 3.
Can’t agree with that. Without Game 1 we wouldn’t have been treated to JR Smith’s hilarious ineptitude , and the world NEEDS laughter.
Obligatory:
https://www.theonion.com/cavs-hoping-to-avoid-game-4-1826647155
Sadly, in my years of Latin instructions, I was never taught that phrase
Rain delay (middle of the 9th, I shit thee not, fuck off Ohio) deejay time:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwhwSirr098
Own basket. Everyone finish your drink!
If it was JR, it doesn’t count.
Nice work by the Browns to give up a long field goal with just five seconds left in the half.
LeBron is going to be thrown out of this game. You can only give the refs so much lip; no matter how blind or one-sided they are.
I say the Hatfields. Wait was that not what we were talking about?
Anyway, I’m bushed thanks to chasing around small children so they sit down to play violin and other things. How is it lizard people?
I can’t stand the peace and quiet, all I want is a runnin riot
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NWFcENP6kko
I was basically playing a one-man game of Red Rover. In a dress shirt and pants.
This NEVAR gets old for me.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmFgejWZjtg
That’s two Rills, if someone says it one more time you-know-who will apear!
/Oh, crap
Beetlejuice?
Also, the interrobang is the best punctuation
⌡ ╦ ‽
Who the fuck is Casper Baby Pants and why does Alexa think I want to listen to songs by them?!
Just to give themselves a challenge, Golden State should sign some poor wheelchair bound make a wish kid next year and play him for 48 minutes a game in the finals.
Biggest downside to the GSW sweeping? No more game day Bevmo coupons.
I haven’t seen a more dejected team go into halftime since the 1995 Toon Squad.
Well there were the rumors of a LeBron Space Jam sequel… this is your audition!
I saw the Cav trying to kick that pass. They’re so bad, they can’t even cheat right.
Eating food supplies your body with calories, but why isn’t there any way to expedite the expenditure of calories? Then I could eat more food but not get fatter. Is there any greater injustice in the world?
#RomanTickleFeathers
I want to put a vomitorium in the same strip mall as my Sports Opium Den. I shall get into the Wall Street Journal yet!!
LMFAO
Exercise, but finite, inefficient, and occasionally breaks stuff
Ryan Gosling is Neil Armstrong?!
I’m mean its great Claire Foy is getting some mainstream movies (you should watch Crown on Netflix – its pretty good) (and its weird hearing her in a American accent), but back to my original point…
Ryan Gosling is Neil Armstrong?!
In all seriousness, if LeBron James somehow, someways carries this NIT All-Stars Team back to win this thing, he’s the best ever. End of discussion.
All respect to his Airness, but at least his teammates were good.
How many NBA finals in recent memory have been without LeBron? He has no worries legacy-wise
But is he shootin’ at the walls of heartache?
No, because he’s not the Warrior(s).
Right now, he’s in the conversation. Like comparing the Steel Curtain of the 70s to the 49ers of the 80s to the Patriots of the 00s-10s.
If he wins, it’ll be like the Big Red Machine versus the 20s Yankees. Both are great, but one is obviously better than the other.
“What about us?” -‘39 Yankees, who might have been even better
I’m firmly in the camp that modern athletes,in every sport, are significantly better than older ones. Have you seen these compound bows?
You can’t level set, but no single player has been as dominant, ever. To say he isn’t withing striking distance of best ever would be equivalent to saying that over the course of his career the average play of the the next 20 best players or so has been worse than it was before he was in the NBA
I dont know about all that fancy ciphering but the improvements in steroid quality alone makes me take Lebron
it’s hard to compare, because “The Association” is no longer a legitimate sport
Yeah, that ain’t gonna happen.
There are few things in the world that I love more than grated cheese.
Canada Grating Again is what’s got trump all mad at you guys.
counterpoint: all cheese is fookin’ disgusting
Melted cheese would like a word
It’s summertime!
All the Browns jokes are invalid. Like they would even get close to a Championship Game.
how did #ThePauls do when Jim Brown played?
…and a blown coverage by the Browns defense leads to yet another easy score for their opponents.
They don’t even use baskets anymore; this is the biggest travesty of false advertising since my case against The Neverending Story.
OK, so if I am to survive the next few months with only el Beisbol (fuck you, Baltimore) and Futbol (holy shit, am I really that desperate?), Imma have to pick some new teams to follow.
To coin a HippoPhrase…I need at least a couple of “ShadowPacks” to root for, or at least follow mildly, which will not cause me to become suicidal.
I’m open to suggestions. But no AL East dirt teams, please. And none of those Eastern European Futbol teams. The women are too hot.
I’ll take submissions here.
(phrasing)
Gotta root for Panama. Think of the puns. Join the Panamaniacs!
plus, just thunderfuck England!
Given recent…. events, I suggest an African team.
OK, settle down over there!!!!!
😛
I laid out my case a few days ago! AGREED!
Any Spanish speaking country EXCEPT Spain. They employ Sergio Ramos. Saving grace: those 5’3” guys got skills like Westworld hosts, the Dolores army kind.
Agreed. Fuck Spain and anyone from there.
Sheeeeeiiiiit. Counterpoint, the lovely ladies of Hinds, f/k/a Deers:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HpQgrWndsLg
Ahem…
Think about it.
Then forgive me.
You know you still love me.
No matter the time of year, even when I lived by Wrigley (and my neighbor named his dog Wrigley) I always forget when baseball is happening
UPDATE for Redshirt – now Billy Hamilton misreads a ball thinking he needed to climb the wall in dead center. almost Jose Cansecos it over. Triple for Ozuna.
The Bungles are going to have a tall order to top what the dREaDS are doing this long lost summer.
of course, we stranded him at 3rd (nobody was out) because we are more than a bit shit ourselves. MIL or PIT just has to win this thingy.
‘Have you met my Polish friend Richard?,
Somebody look in on Son of Spam?
/Ohtani getting “stem cell injection” in his pitching elbow, will check back in 3 weeks. #Wishcasting
Elbow baby coming up
Pretty typical first quarter for the Browns, two turnovers and trailing by nine.
this works too well and is kinda creepy
Also that it’s a very important game for the franchise and the number of fans in attendance is 20,562.
So, the Bevmo 5 cent wine sale thing has me pretty much entirely off liquor. This would be fine, except that now I have a purely ornamental bar of mixer liquors, and the day I drink straight campari is the day I go Carrie Nation
LeBron: “Cleveland, I don’t feel so good…”
Oh, and I have no TV access at the moment, but I’m just gonna assume how the NBA finals go
It’s just not fair that Kevin Durant aka Avon Barksdale
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m09x9c2N2A1qbcs46o1_500.jpg
brought in his ringer but what’s Prop Joe gonna do about it?
Go Caps for breaking the DC drought (and for actually playing in DC, Gallery Place/Chinatown represent!)
Also, are testicles a primary or secondary sex characteristic? Either way, while it may not entice the same way, I support y’all’s right to sideball it
Also…primary.
The hair on one’s nutsack…secondary.
Any more questions?
😛
I suspected as much cause the whole sperm manufactory thing. Also, why the hell does my phone not recognize the word ‘sperm’? What sort of prudish dictionary is on here?
/borrows Dok’s phone
It recognizes sperm now, babeeeee!!!!!
Hey, my phone still has a keyboard, don’t go gunking it up!
Hey, if I can gunk up Hippo’s Blackberry while he’s not looking, what makes you think your phone is too good for such treatment?
wait, you’re a BlackBerry person too??
Just like that scene from Back to the Future, that’s some fortunate Berry placement.
Damn right. Don’t know what I’ll do when my Priv finally dies.
Oh Jeebus. There’s two of ’em now.
smgdh
There always has been, not my fault if you didn’t notice the signs
Having known you in the same time and space on a few occasions, I’m ashamed I didn’t notice. If I had, it would have been at the bottom of the fountain at Caesar’s Palace.
Also…out of the closet and INTO TEH STREETS!!
I got a BlackBerry KeyOne when I was forced to upgrade, but hold onto what you have as long as you can. This is like a hybrid with a Droid, and I do NOT consider it hybrid vigor.
Still have a hard text keyboard, at least.
Turns out we don’t have to wait all the way until September to watch a Browns game.
somebody look in on Redshirt
/any other #BFIB lurking will know what I mean
Aw, hell. What happened to the Reds now.
#BFIB have terrible lefty reliever in, men on 1st and 2nd, 2 outs after a walloped RBI single by Votto, 5-1 lead cut to 5-4. Tucker Barnhart for some reason takes off for 3rd base after the 1-1 pitch and is thrown out by about 20 feet.
#BFIB scratch out a 6th run in top of 7th, in annoying #BFIB fashion.
“Billy Hamilton gets all the glory. Anyone can steal 3rd base.”
Looking like Hippo shall make lots of moneys on the Dirt Giants coming back on the Dirt Mets, and I’d be much obliged if the Dirt Charged Ones and Dirt Redacteds would follow suit and complete theirs as well.
/don’t worry, I insurance bet the #BFIB goddamnit
Outside shot I gets mah stake over $20K tonite. Might be an airport strip club kinda evenin…
Niiiiiice. But you shoulda told me sooner.
I’m well on my way to being wrecked.
Dirt Jets may fuck me over anyway. Que lastima.
– A. Benitez
/turns on the NBA
//already wants to kill self
/turns on Baltimore @ Toronto
//kills self
– A. Bourdain
Boom
Canadian Football: Converting Fourth And Goal into Third And Goal Since Before You Were Born!
Woo hoo! Basketball time! They are going to LIGHT IT UP toni…oh who am I kidding this is just a formality.
If basketball doesn’t tickle your balls, could I interest you in some preseason CFL action?
I just read that the Bombers sent 4 potential starters that’s it. It will be a derp fest.
I mean, I do know how to read, smh
So glad I put together an effective google search function that got me to a helpful place.
https://www.marijuana.com/community/threads/when-to-know-your-bowl-is-finished.246394/
“how many times til weed is burnt“ was the search.
Hehehe…you still on that?
Smoke it ’til it’s cashed out, dude.
how’d i know? i didn’t study it in school.
White ash. Means nothing left my friend. Black ash still has some left.
Well yeah, I learned that from the site.
Else I just figured it was when it turned black.
The reason I’m posting this tune? It’s fucking great. That’s the reason.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xgAlL6gSvxo
Cockburn though? He always kind’ve rubbed me the wrong way.
Huh, I didn’t know Paul Manafort was 69.
In the past few years we have seen:
*The Cubs win the World Series
*Cleveland take home a Championship
*A 16th seed beat a #1 in the NCAA Tourny
*The Caps win the Stanley Cup
Smoke’em if you got’em folks the only rational explanation here is we are at the End of Days
Eagles won a Super Bowl.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mbBbFH9fAg
TRUE STORY: I used to have a badass “Black Hole Sun” T-shirt, until a 5’1″ evil girlfriend (she was still at State when I was in law school, friend of a friend) who liked to sleep in it ruined it by association. I did insist on retrieving it post-nasty breakup, but ’twas never the same.
Underboob is the forbidden boob.