Welcome to Monday Night! In which we have the last game of the week and it happens to be a good one if you like the colour “light blue”.
This also works if you like teams that are stuck in the middle
of the mediocrity zone that is a .500 record.
Both teams have a 3-4 record and ASPIRE to reach the magical .500 mark.
On the one hand, you have the Cowboys, led by a tin of canned ham
and on the other you have a duck that continuously ducks to avoid getting hurt
by big fat defensive linemen that are only stopped by what basically resembles this:
So, what i’m saying is, we have a wonderful game ahead of us.
At least the game is in Arlington, so the crowd shots should be pleasant to watch.
Did you know there is a Victoria’s Secret store in Jerry World? I can sadly report that the last time I was there they basically only sold PJs, sweats, stuff like that. No thongs with a big Star covering up the hoohah.
Missed opportunity, JJ!
Enjoy the game!
That was beautiful.
The fact the offense doesn’t use play action every down is fucking stupid.
Wife just told me there is a medical cocaone they use for nose bleeds.
/Hippo punches hisself
All the medical cocaine comes from making Coca Cola
That was the ending this Cowboys team deserves. Wow.
that entire sequence…just delightfully Benny Hill-ish
hey, DAK! almost made hisself a FG at least
Nice trickeration there Cowgirls
LMAO
/redux
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=37&v=Y-qdQ2AI2H0
Seriously, at what point does the Ole Double J get rid of The Ginger? It’s embarrassing.
Fingers crossed for “never.”
Yeah — a man we all joke is so unstable is really just an old cook who can’t let go of someone obviously exploiting his mental condtion.
Once The Ginger bites the hand that feeds him. Who knows when that is, though
Awful quiet there in Jerrah World.
If there was a way to bottle that sadness & sell it, that’d be great.
“Suppository?”
-King Hippo
Don’t give Jerry any ideas
Stay out of bullwhip range if you see Double J this week.
Goddamn the Cowboys window was small and closed quickly.
You know, I always thought they should have gone all in on Manziel.
He’s picked worse.
Like that blonde from the Plano whorehouse in 85
These three comments are banner worthy.
Don’t the Raiders get that pick?
which I’m sure Jerral didn’t Top 10 protect because Amari Cooper’s a goddamned star!
Weaselo’s next production:
/revision/latest?cb=20100910230535
So time to bring Wade Phillips back to fix up that D?
I feel like Wade is just an excellent coordinator.
Garrett better have someone else start his car tonight.
He seems like the sort of person who would have someone do that for him anyway
Would a Princetonian do something so gauche as drive a car?
You know he’s got some dumb British sportscar convertible that only starts one out of five attempts and needs the plugs cleaned every 250 miles and you have to add castor oil somewhere.
Doesn’t his limo driver do that anyway? Something something Princeton something something Grey Poupon
Please Double J, end Garrett. End the madness.
How did I just KNOW this would be North Cakalaky?
https://talkingpointsmemo.com/news/appeals-court-judge-son-accused-burning-cross-threatening-synagogue
The judge… was a woman.
“Mental illness”, fuck that asshole with a Star of David.
last funny:
imagine if your roommate made you watch a movie and left ten minutes into it. dick move, right? my point is old people shouldn’t get to vote
I don’t want to say I’m a compulsive masturbator, but I jerked off twice while I was typing this post. Make that three times. Don’t worry, I can stop any time I want.
Dude regions? That’s beaches where surfers tend to flock, right?
Tossing salad has gone mainstream
Great work counteracting no-fap November!
Same here, that would explain why I can type faster with one hand than I can with both.
What is Hippo’s butthole after a weekend of betting?
I’ll take Porent Potables for $100, Alex!
I tells ya, the Demmycrats are DUE!!
NO; IT’S A UNICORN’S ASSHOLE DURING ORGASM.
Dividing by zero again?
Dak might need glasses
probably just misses his old glasses
All Cowboys fans need shot glasses
1 more sack! 1 more sack!!!!! come on TITS defense!
The kicker should get 4 points for coming out of it early.
Saved by the DOINK!
DOINK!!!!! bahahaha!
HAIL SHAN’KLOR
PRAISE DOINK!
I may suck at cooking but I do good at seasoning. Senor Weaselo’s fry seasoning: A solid amount of Reaper-Cussions for salt, a similar amount of black pepper, then some more powdered Reaper while we’re at it.
You sir, must have the colon and sphincter of tempered steel!
The wisdom I’ve gained is when to pick my wars (like days that I don’t have a gig the next day). I don’t have to teach again until NEXT Tuesday, which means I can get my capsaicin reserves back up!
Cowboys D:
oh wow, they let it stand after the conference. I laugh b/c it’s the non-gendered Cowpersons, but Christ on a cracker
Just a complete garbage call.
Tomorrow, however, the NFL will have a long-winded explanation as to how the crew got it exactly right.
Just like they would have one for how the crew got it exactly right if they didn’t make that call.
Life in the Ginger Era
That’s a clean hit.
just lucky it’s not JV, he’d have been thrown out for that clean football play
“YOU BET IT WAS!”
-Abe Reles
Romonobyl’s comment reminds me: worst bruise I ever got was when i tripped coming out of the shower , somehow my middle toe caught the rail, it was bad.
Weird part? It stopped hurting after 1 day, but was still bruised like crazy. No injury what so ever.
Sean Lee is hurt? The hell you say!
I’ve seen….. this somewhere…… can’t quite place it……
Can’t believe it took so long.
at least he’ll have no memory of it!
Thumbs down on the Tits’ away uniform
Cowboys no match for the Tits
Cowboys have bad nipples.
Anyone ever visit Fukuoka? Just started planning a trip for next September and I’ll be there for a few days, so recommendations welcome!
Women tell me to go there all the time.
Oh, I misread that.
Is that the place with the nuclear disaster?
Nah, that’s Fukushima, which is in a totally different part of Japan
Ah yes, I see. Is Fukuoka where they dropped the atom bomb?
Garrett is prolly updating his LinkdIn profile on that pad.
if it’s anything more than 4th grade phys ed teacher he’s woefully underqualified
Huh, a quick search reveals that I have multiple 3rd degree connections to people who work for the Cowboys, including someone who works as a Microsoft Surface Tech
Garrett would likely be the guy responsible for Windows ME.
they might want that Tiempo Fuera back later ,, smh
Moar Cooper!!!!
She was great as M’gann M’orzz
Jonnu with the touchdownnu!
Oh good. A robocall from the local police organization telling me how to vote.
/votes exactly the opposite
“We need to be free to look at your stuff without a warrant and shoot brown people without being questioned.”?
MOAR DONUTS
We want a raise.
one or the other, raise or shoot blacks with impunity!
Ever stub your toe so hard you’re scared to look at it?
Yes. Some mountain bike crashes were that way too, but morbid curiosity always wins my brain.
yup, it turned black 3 days later
/actually bent back the wrong way, and it’s a big toe that’s been surgically fucked with and really ain’t supposed to bend like that
//pills sweet pills
SORRY ABOUT YOUR PENIS!
Think nothing of it, I’ve had to apologize for it many times.
Yep. Ironically when I did break my toe, it didn’t hurt that bad
Just got home, how’s the game? Worth the effort of finding a stream?
I’d look for a nice brook instead, or maybe a peaceful mill pond.
I’m a fan of creeks, but with a mill pond I could get my wheat turned to flour….hmmm
This one does corn. Read the brochure!
So, what the Raiders like a Dallas pass rusher for Derek Carr?
Sweet jesus fuck one more day of these fucking commercials. Then the GENERAL ELECTION CYCLE BEGINS FUCK YEAH BITCHES WALL-TO-WALL HILLARY
Here in CA (even in formerly bright red OC) we gets ads hating on anyone supporting Trump. It’s quite refreshing.
Actually a small coachable moment there.
When a qb feels pressure, they need to prioritize protecting the ball. You a lot of qbs clam up when they get hit
Daunte Culpepper for the next generation. Remember that guy? I had to google his first name. History is cruel.
I legit thought his first name was brian for like 2 years.
I wasn’t watching much football when he was a rookie, so I just casually said it one day, brian culpeper, and my dad just gave me a look like, how fucking dumb is this kid?
yay TITS defense!!!!!!!!